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As they gathered around the banquet table in the town that bears no name but is familiar to those that are principles in the story, Sancho Panza was asked to relate a story which depicts the Knight Errant in a most favorable and amusing light. This was not difficult for the Squire as he had a talent for adding extra seasoning to a pot that needed little more than a grace of salt and perhaps pepper.
"Friend, as I know you to be friends by the attendance on this glorious day. God has smiled on us. The rain yesterday was most welcome and the North wind now blesses us with force for our mills and fills our sails with a gentle and caressing breeze. The corn and lentils are now assured of filling our larders and the pigs grow fat from the mast that will surely fall. The flowers that adorn our tables cannot overshadow the outpouring of our host, while may they might, at any less than this abundant feast. The politicians are at once silent and the force sent by the King to protect us has this day filled their pockets with our hard won monies and are gathered elsewhere to count their "blessing." Our old have good teeth, the young straight bones, our paupers and poets have found a means of filling their stomachs (but not too full), and love abounds.
Note well that the cause of much of my Master's ventures into the outside world is here at this banquet. As we all know her and much respect her for saving herself, unblemished, for a wealthy suitor, let us raise our cups to lady Dulcinea. While her face may be able to stop clocks and her belly, round may it be, contains no life other than her own, the pearly white skin, not unlike the fatty shroud that covers the beast as it hangs in the shop of the meat vendor, her teeth while they are straight, do not quite match but serve as a suitable strainer for separating the solids that swim in the brew that she offers for sale in the marketplace. It is true that the belly supports the legs, but in our fair damsel's case, her magnificent post would well support the stomach of Rozinante, if called into act. Her stomach as I said before has what appears to have a life of its own; countless times we have heard it speak ^� the flavors of garlic once served are never forgotten in the second passing and the wind of the lentils emitted from our beauty could raise bedcovers from the most heavy coverlet in the depth of our days of short sun. They stir the skirts that modestly cover, or attempt to cover her knees and by the aroma remind us of places where we rather not be. Yes my Master pledged his life; and mine as well to serve this picture of God's offering to man and what Spain sought to impose on those who call themselves Portuguese. Is it a wonder that they and the Basque as well have stayed within their boundary's in fear that once aroused we good Castileans might inflict a more vicious penalty upon them by offering up our maids in waiting if they be so bold as to have conquest in their minds."
To this was heard a cheer that echoed from the nearby forest and startled the nap of Rozinante who having completed the passage from the last exploit was now laying on a layer of fat on his hips and across his narrow back. Perhaps in anticipation of another venture into the unknown, this mighty steed sought refuge in the merry presence of the growing herd of mares that seemed to be accumulated by Sancho as if by chance. It being well known that a foray of a stallion and his mares through the country side often resulted in an increase in his brood although to the dismay of their rightful owners who often were unclear of the legality of the process as they had perhaps "acquired" the services of the mare through a midnight venture as well.
Our fair maid Dulcinea having visited the keg more than once this morning, was pleased to hear her name mentioned in such a favorable light. Most of the time, she was shunned by the locals who were afraid that some apparition might appear that would grant them the pleasure of a continuation of her services. The women grimaced and the men applauded as more than one had awakened in a foggy morn to discover Dulcinea at their side. They would be the first to vouch for her chastity, as none would admit to having deflowered such a renowned member of the community.
At last, the Don interrupted as he was so prone to do. "Sancho, please, the children should be spared such a definition of principle. Let their grandparents teach them what their parents will not and do not presume that you have been given the position of sage of our community. That rest with the good student of Salamanca who wisely knows when to fill his mouth with food, (as you are most capable of doing, and should do) and when to meddle into the affairs of those who haven't any interest in having a sermon delivered (if it is that which they wish, then the learned man of the Cloth can do it quite well, as he has learned that to encourage the contribution to his well being it is best to not be too observant in the unusual interest his flock has in man and beast.)"
"Granted, sire. Let me begin the tale of the fool who sat beneath the olive tree and how he came to provide a wise man with the guidance that saved our country from the ravages of war.
As we were the guest of a man no more renown than our own King Ferdinand and he had in attendance, the family of one of our most prosperous and rich, Don Argonese de la Santa Cruse. The Don, not to be confused with our valorous knight Quixote, and his wife had arrived at the staging grounds of trials in combat and in their charge were their two maiden daughters who having reached the ripe age of fifteen and beyond were now poised for marriage. While the Don was a man of character beyond reproach, his wife, Armanda, alas, had the wiles of her former husband and was most knowledgeable in the ways of winning succor from an opponent, the most that could be gained. In particular, she desired that the King should arrange the marriage of her first born, to the King's son. The lady in waiting was a winsome lass by name of Gretchen. Who, it must be said had inherited her dam's ways of winning and could connive with the best of them. She also had arms that were more fit for battle than for holding a child in her embrace. Her way of sitting a horse more of that of a cavalier than one of gentle and kind ways, especially as she was known to put spurs to the sides of her animal and run it until it dropped to gain advantage in a race. Her voice was a bit deeper than might be desired and her taking a choice of words to express opinion perhaps could be better. As you can see, the lass was not one to rest gently at the side of her husband.
Be that as it may, Armanda had caused her good husband to beseech the King to permit the marriage of their daughter to the King's sole claimant to the throne, his first born and most favored child. The boy, although of the age of twenty and one, had the disposition of his father and would rather not fight if there was a means of avoiding confrontation. And in the ways of treating the fair sex, he was not inclined to seek out their favor, although it was the right of the heir to the crown of Spain to do so if such was his desire. No he had lived more as a man of the Church (not as our resident does it is for sure), and if eunuchs were in favor, he might be suspected as being one. Such were his gentle ways. But he was manly as could be clearly seen by his growth of beard, although it must be admitted it was a bit weak in appearance and ^�twas rumored that he blackened it with the preparations of the day to make it more distinct, sometimes colouring the underlying skin as well as without the aid of assistance from his man of the hour would unavoidable besmear much too much. Some rumored him to be a poet as well and that his verse was often heard in local plays. The plays he was known to support with a dip into from his father's larder of gold from time to time.
His father having accepted the proposal for the wedding had posed the question to his son who simply shrugged and said what will be, will be. And with that, it was announced that the wedding would follow the contest which all were here to see.
Our famous Knight, Don Quixote, was at the fair and it was his interest to win for the damsel, Dulcienea, favors that would much advance him in her approval of swains who he knew were seeking her hand. When the King learned of the Knight errant's presence, (and mine as well may I add), nothing would be but that we should attend a course of meals that was laid out from the nearby peasants larders and was most generous, may I say so. So it was that on the eve of the major joust, we were all assembled. I remember it well.
On the King's right hand sat the Don. On his left, with access to the King's good ear sat the Armanda who intended to say much about the advantages the King would gain, through his son's marriage to her daughter. Seated next to Armanda, sat me, Squire to our village's most famous son. And then next came the daughter, Gretchen, who would prove quite a contestant with me for the favors of the table.
On Don Quixote's right sat the father of the intended bride and next to him sat his younger daughter, Catherine, who I will describe later, time permitting. This youngster of ten and five, I must admit was the fairest of those assembled. She had a spark about her that drew everyone's attention ^� especially that of the King's son, Charles, who at first sat stone cold still as if in a trance and later became a bit more alive as he came to appreciate the beauty who sat beside him.
As the table was somewhat round, those on the ends could see most clearly those across from them. It was in this way Prince Charles, could see his bride to be and consider her charms while still being in the presence of this vision of sweetness. Our good Don entertained the party well with his tales of accomplishments, especially how he had fought the dopplegangers that had inhabited the castle by the sea. In modesty, I admit that he gave me my fare share of praise, which I acknowledged with my usual grace. Following the meal that lasted more than the time to, I forget how to measure it, the banquet was ended. And, the simple folk of the village came to gather the scraps from the table for their own use.
As the King had sought my advice on a manner of great concern, I was invited to his tent, as was on Valorous Knight. It seems that the Prince had approached his father with the bold statement that he was not going to wed the one to whom he had been pledged but instead would marry the dear one who had been seated with him at the banquet. The King was most distressed, his word was his bond and he had given the people to know that Gretchen, the first, would be wed to his son, not this new arrival, Catherine. Although, he acknowledged that this younger was by far the most attractive and suitable for his son's taste. If he went back on his word, a darker problem emerged. One of the benefits of this wedding was to free himself from the rule of the money changers, in particular Jacob Fugger, the rich. They were bleeding his coffers dry as they provided loans for the forays into France to protect Spain's boundary. He now was pledging the people's future earnings as collateral to the money advanced for the wars. At the exorbitant interest charged, he would either have to renege on his pledges which would surely be a disaster in which none of the monied Walser's and others would provide relief for his financial pains. The marriage would provide access to the wealth of the Santa Cruse family. With the monies, he could hire those forces necessary to pursue the war and he (and his son) could retire to more comfortable and safe surroundings in Madrid. Now all was in shambles. He could not refuse the wishes of his son, nor could he withdraw the pledge he had made. It was for this reason, he sought the council of Don Quixote (and myself as well).
We three sat under an olive tree and Ferdinand retold the circumstances of the enigma. Finally he asked for my Master's sage advice. Don Quixote picked from the ground a fallen olive and considered it for a moment as he turned it between his thumb and forefinger as though it might have been as well, something dislodged from the innermost reaches of his nose.
Sire, there is a poem from the Moors that may be applied as a balm to your suffering. It goes, as I remember it, something like this; "A fool sat beneath an olive tree and thinking of the olive he held in his hand, said; "why should I have an olive when I can have a tree, why a tree when I can have a grove, why a grove when I can have the world. But then he went to sleep. But Sire, what was a deep thought for the fool, has awakened me. Yes indeed, the answer is plain as the nose on your royal face. Why have an olive (the lady Gretchen), when you can have the tree (the monies of Santa Cruse family), why have a tree when you can have the grove (both daughters), why have the grove when you can have the world, (at least Flanders and beyond)."
"Enough." said the King, "Can't knights speak in other than riddles, I may as well have asked my poet son for an answer. But wait, I am beginning to see the light. Yes, assemble the people. I have a royal pronouncement to make!" And with that we all returned to the banquet table.
With the herald of trumpets, the masses of both high and low families were called to the King's table, on which he stood so that all could see him in his most regal dress.
"I, King Ferdinand, ruler of Spain, am to take a new wife. Her name is lady Gretchen." A hush fell over the crowd at this most strange proclamation. How could it be, Gretchen was pledged to his son. "As I take the pride of the Santa Cruse family as my own, I am sure that my son will be greatly disappointed, but as he is young he will recover from his sadness and perhaps will find it in his heart to embrace the younger member of the family as a lady much suitable for his attention.
I have so ruled!" And with that he commanded that one of his knights forcibly seize lady Gretchen and take her to his tent for the pleasures of the King.
How wise it was for my sire to suggest this simple solution to the enigma. Don Argonese and his wife would see their two daughters married to royalty. The King had his money. The lady Gretchen could go to Flanders flying the King's colours and fight as she was so disposed to do. The King could retire to the South and avoid the troubles of war. Prince Charles would have his fair maid and they likewise could seek greener pastures. And the money lenders, Fuggers and Walsers, found a ready demand for their golden hordes from the opposition who were forced to raise an army of mercenary legionaries who must be paid. "
"But what of the contest in which Don Quixote was to have been the champion?" Asked a sleepy voice from the far table.
"A fair question. But I must sadly say that our Knight Errant was not to be judged the following day. It was a problem of my own doing. As I had hobbled the good horse, Rozinante, so that he would not stray, the bindings became tight with the morning dew and fired his fetlock causing him much pain and gave him a decided limp. Seeing this, our Don could not bear to cause this noble animal additional suffering, and of course would sit no other. Having explained this to the King, the Don was rewarded with a suitable seat of honor in the First Booth where he was called upon to assist in rewarding prizes to those who won favor."
.As Sancho completed his tale, he noted that Don Quixote's head lay in his lady's lap and she was brushing away the stray hair that seemed to always find its way into his vision. The lasses of the village had departed for the inn where better drink was offered, and they were followed by the swains who recognized that the party was not over but just beginning. Sancho's wife had gathered into her abundant apron the scraps from the table and summoned him with her free hand to come along as the swine herd would surely benefit from the largess of their host. Only the bachelor and the barber remained but they were in deep discussion as to the merits of a new procedure for control of the affliction of wind which so troubled many of the folk. Such was the attention the people of the village paid to their returning Knight and his Squire. When the food and drink were exhausted, they found other pleasures. Food for thought, mused Sancho.
Vale.
Soldier returns, Tales, Toothache, Insemination, Saltpetre, Snallygaster, Fulling mills, Flyaway Islands, The cat in the tree, Strawberries, Cave, Bath, Conclusion, Epilog_1, Epilog_2, Epilog_3, Epilog_4, Banquet, Sancho's tale, Flax, Ingenuous, Avellaneda, Truth, Dali.
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