*AG? my cousin's name is Alex G. Are you talkin' bout my family?*
Come in, over
*i'm here, and i'm waiting for you to shuddup, but i guess that ain't
happening any time soon, huh?*
Yo, turn me up
*i can hear ya just fine, buddy. As a matter of fact, why don't you turn
down the volume? it's a little loud.*
I wanna be heard
*Wow. i'm impressed. you, mr. fake-southern-accent-that-is-so-
totally-obvious-and-that-has-ghetto-relapses Space Cowboy has something
constructive to say? well, then, out with it boy!*
See i'm talkin' bout the future, y'all
*The future, y'say? Almost intelligent and constructive. ALMOST.*
And the future looks bright
*Bright? since when did you have the chance to get away from your duties
saving civilization as we know it from the Y2K bug to notice what goes on
down here on the lonely, miniscule planet we call home?*
'especially when we rip it in half.
*Ummmm, ya lost me at the we part. where does it say in my contract that i
am supposed to work with you? i will sue! By the by, how in the hello do
you propose that we rip the future in half when you can't even physically
touch it? just a thought.*
*Ah, the first verse. Finally! i know, i know, i ramble on a tad much. so...on with the sh...er song.*
Here it comes, millenium
*Thank you for pointing that out. i never would've known that if you hadn't
told me.*
And everybody's talkin about, Jerusalem
*Define "EVERYBODY."*
Is this the beginning or beginning if the end
Oh. My. Lance. This is the most intelligent thought i have ever heard
come out of the mouth of JC. And he wrote this song, too? DAYUM! this boy is
movin' up on the IQ scale. Go, Boy! Go*
Well i've got other thoughts my friends
*Forget to call Jerome? Caffiene just ain't enough anymore, is it? Got crack?
uh...i mean COFFEE. (coughbullcough)*
See i've got my eyes on the skies
*Uh huh. Had a fix lately? Feelin a little HIGH?*
The heavenly bodies up high
*See. I told you he uses crack. why would he want to be HIGH unless he used
crack!*
And if your in the mood to take a ride
*Only if Lance is there to hold me when JC spazzes. That boy is scary!*
Then strap on a suit and get inside
*Where do i sign?*
*The infamous chorus. Get ready for the RIDE of your life. hehe*
So if you wanna fly, come and take a ride
*With Lance, anyday. didn't we already go over this?*
Take a space ride with a cowboy, baby
*As long as Lance is the cowboy. We already went over this. Let's move on.*
If you wanna fly, come and take a ride
*Are you saying that Lance doesn't want to take me flying and make me his
cowgirl?*
Take a space ride with a cowboy, baby
*Are you sayin that JUSTIN wants to be my space cowboy? Oh, no. No way. If
that boy comes anywhere near me, i swear JC, you will never hear from Jerome
again!*
Why-yi-yi-yippee-yi-yay-yippee-yi-yo-yippee-yi-yay
*That's right! that hit hard, huh, jc? Aimed right at the heart!*
Why-yi-yi-yippee-yi-yay-yippee-yi-yo-yippee-yi-yo
*Oh, yeah. That kick in the nuts hurt like hell, huh Justin? That's for even
suggesting that you and i could be together. Now get away from me before you
replace Chris in the group as soprano.*
*Verse 2. sung by none other than Lusty Thrusty Justy himself.*
We don't need all these prophecies
*What prophecies? Oh, the prophecies that say that you won't be able to hide
your relationship with Brit anymore coz eventually someone will see past
(singing, yet AGAIN) this charaaaaaaade! (from Grease 2) old news, bub.*
Tellin' us what's a sign, what's a sign
*Ya wanna see a sign? Here's a sign, and it says that if you don't get as
far away from me as possible, i will call on the great powers of the
Almighty Lance, leader of the world and All-Powerful Being, to kick your
sorry butt back to the hood (coughtrailerparkcough) capeesh?*
Cause paranoia ain't the way to live your life from day to day
*I'm having another oh my Chris moment. He actually said that? Oh, wait, JC
wrote this. Mad props to JC for writing something that we can apply to our
everyday lives, but you lose them all by letting Justin sing it. Why not
Joey? Oh, wait. that would be even worse. sorry I asked.*
So leave your doubts and your fears behind
*With you, Lusty Thrusty Justy? yeah right. I'd be a fool to let my guard
down with you and Joey around*
Don't be afraid at all
*Ok, who said anything about being scared? As long as i have Lance the
Almighty by my side I have no reason to be scared. Except when it comes to
JC. Then I get a little, einsy, teinsy, weinsy bit scared. But not enough to
make me do anything.*
Cause up in outer space there's no gravity to fall
*Oh, sorry Joe. we don't need you anymore. There's no gravity to fall,
according to Justin, so we don't need your big butt to land on any more.
sorry!*
Put your mind and your body to the test
*Uuuuummmmmmmmm, lemme think. (scratches chin) NO! NO! NO! NO! Do you need
me to repeat that for you? No way am i puttin my body to the test if you and
Joey are around, Justin. Just...no. And JC, JC'd probably try to see how
much crack i can take before dying, not to mention Chris tellin' me all his
jokes, but that shouldn't take long. As for you, Lance, you big hunka
buffed-up Mississippi Albino, (sense the exaggeration here?) PLEASE put me
to the test. C'mon baby, you know you want to!*
Cause up in outer space it's like the wild, wild, west
*Ah to see a tumbleweed roll across my path. The good ol' days. Wait, not
that kinda wild, wild west? Oh, the Wild, Wild West with Kevin Kline and
Will Smith (who rocks! welcome to MIAMI!) Ah, yes. Justin's wild wild west,
where he plays the part of James West, and JC is Artemis, and Lance is that
Salma Hayek chick. Wait, mebbe that should be Chris. And Joey could be
Loveless, coz then he'd get all the chicks in totally trashy clothing.
Cool!*
*Ah, the chorus is repeated, But you don't wanna hear that again, so...onto the rap. Oh, beautiful day it is when i don't have to hear Justin and Chris attempt to rap. I still think that they shoulda let Lance do Left Eye's rap in concert, but such is life. Anycrap...*
Boom and never let you try to stop me
*I am outta the way, coz i see Lance over there at the karaoke machine,
choosing a Garth Brooks song. Hot stuff, comin' thru!*
Born to fly sky high up to the top see
*See! i told you she did crack! I also think that she and JC share needles,
but us crackheads have to stick together, right? Oops! Did I say crack? I
meant coffee!*
Nothing to fear, no doubts and no tears
*That's right, nothing to fear, unless Jerome gets arrested and they
confiscate his whole store of crack. Oops! did i say that out loud?*
Millenium sound to motivate the future years
*Uuummmmmmm, okkkaaaayyyy.*
And you can either be scared or get prepared
*I've got Lance. I'm ready. What about you JC?*
Against all odds i bet you never would've dared
*That's what YOU think. but you don't know me at all. See, i am a very
interesting person, and i never back down from a challenge.*
To make these moves and take flight like me
*Uuummmm, i'll leave that job to JC. He'll definately take flight with you.*
To come thru for the world prophecy
*That's Justin's department. He has to deal with the "prophecies" as you
call them, about himself and Britney. I'm not surprised, coz after all, it's
been proven that they shared a hotel room.*
Space connect to overthrow your interception
*I have no idea how to intercept this. Maybe the Spaced Crackheads JC and
Left Eye "connected" to overthrow my interception.*
Ready or not make it hot
*Oh, Lance and I'll be heating it up, alright.*
That ain't no question
*took the words out of my mouth.*
Get *NSYNC and put your head to the sky
*I am *NSYNC. I'm *NSYNC, you're *NSYNC, we are all *NSYNC.*
Keep the faith
*What faith, *NSYNCism?*
One love from Left Eye
*One love? Huh?*
Once again, the chorus. (hears boos from all corners of the room) Alright! Alright! No chorus! you'll just have to scroll up if ya wanna read it again. What was that, Poofu? Oh, you really love my chorus and want me to rewrite it again? Sorry, babydoll, but the masses say no, but how about you and me go to my safari themed room and i'll show you how a real cowgirl rounds up wild animals. (wink, wink)
The end is near! The end is near! Repent! (Chedd grabs Chris's now-short-and-extremely-flattering haircut and pulls him away from screen) I told you to stay in your cage! Did you convince JC to lend you his needle to pick the lock? Bad Boy! Go back to your cage with Busta! Sorry, Chris got out. Dayum, that boy is annoying. That's the 5th time in the last 10 minutes! I thought it would be ok to let JC continue his "habit" but i guess he won't. I could lock him up in the basement with Justin, but i don't want him to pick up Justin's ghetto ways coz he has to sing to me before i go to bed, and that just wouldn't sound right. Ya gotta admit, that boy has a sweet voice. One of the few things that can make me cry besides Lance's feeble attempts to pelvic thrust, and Joey's vocabulary. With Joey, though, i cry from laughing (actually, i hopefully hope, actually). So, as Chris so eloquently put it, the end is near.
Riprock, AG end transmission. they've had enough.
*Of your wack songs, JC! tank you for ending it!*
