My inconsequential rant about McDonalds
When I started working for McDonalds, I freely admit I wasn't very good at it. I couldn't work anywhere near as fast as everyone else, but I was assured I'd get better with time.
My first few shifts were occupied with just keeping up, but within a month I had begun to look around, and little things about the establishment began to worry me. The whole place epitomises "economies of scale", and clearly when the McDonalds system was designed, it was done by someone with a great deal of intelligence, who managed to design out most of the potential for error. The fish portions will only fit in the fish basket, for example, and the menu board is above and behind the tills so customers look up, open their mouths and talk to the till operator rather than the floor. The whole kitchen works like a giant shapesorter because most of the staff hold the corresponding IQ.
The theory behind employing 'less clever' people is that they demand less money, and money is what the whole business is about. Everything is budgeted and timed. The exact cost of each Big Mac can be calculated to hundredths of a penny, knowing how many servings each bag of dehydrated onions holds and how many burgers each menial worker can make per minute.
The controlled environment is one of a factory rather than that of a kitchen; I know one of the 'better' kitchen workers can stick the lettuce and sauce on 12 Big Macs in thirteen seconds, and the whole emphasis of the manager's job is to get more work out of the staff in the same timespan. Different stores are traded off against each other in a league table of 'pence profit per burger', which itself is a statistical nonsense.
All this is good sound business sense, although it does perhaps encourage the management of each franchise to treat the workers as robots, and as such there are few staff who enjoy their shifts there. In general there are three types of people who work at McDonalds - students who work part time while still at college, who are in general clever and can cope better with the accounting and business side than the base-level cooking post they applied for. There are also slightly older people who work there as a stepping stone to earn a little money before they move into their intended career, and finally there are the people who see McDonalds as the end rather than the means to a different end. They plan to stay with the company and move up the ranks. While the pyramid of ranks at McDonalds has a very wide base, it narrows very quickly and so there are many candidates vying for each management position. In general everyone stays where they are, and continue to earn their 5p/hr payrise to stay above inflation.
Despite all this, the one single aspect of McDonalds that irritates me most is the delusional attitude the senior management have towards the image of the company. Perhaps they should learn from the subtle public indicator that their major custom is made up of people under twelve, or those who want a quick meal and don't care what it tastes like. The managers attend management courses, and 'take on board' only those parts they're interested in. They return with the certain knowledge that phrases such as 'Teamwork makes the dream work' and 'Come on! Let's really show the public what we can do' will inspire people to work faster ... sorry, more effectively ... the more times they are shouted. The monthly crew meetings encourage crew to share their concerns for the store, and the managers promise to produce action plans and new work practices to get around the problems. I daresay they do create these 'action plans', but they are filed for copying in triplicate and authorisation by fourteen franchise holders in eight countries, and nothing further happens.
When the happymeal seekers open the McDoor, run to the McCounter and McOrder two McNuggets and McFries with a McCoke, it's fun for them to prefix everyday words. It appeals to their juvenile mind. So why are the cardboard boxes in the stockroom marked up as McSundae topping and McShake mix? The illusion has been run with for so long, it has become reality for those in everyday contact, and it scares me that the adults responsible for a business (and my health and safety while I'm working there) actually use these Tellytubby-esque pseudonyms.
Despite a big bible of guidelines to cover every eventuality so nobody actually has to do any thinking when someone finds a hair in their burger, the philosophy of employing people without the capacity to think has it's flaws, and can work to undermine the structure when the A-level and degree students understand a concept while the management just follow their guidelines.
For example, a customer asks if the meat used in the burgers is halal. While a manager would listen, sympathise and probably bring out an identical burger from the kitchen, assuring the customer it's hally-al, the A-level Religious Studies student can just apologise and provide more meaningful advice.
When I lost more than a certain threshold of money from my till, the management had to follow an 'improper cash handling protocol' and issue me with a verbal warning. The manager called me aside at the end of the shift (so I couldn't clock off) and spent five minutes searching through the office. When she emerged she announced that all the verbal warning forms must have been used up, which brought a smile to my face. She tried to palm me off with a written warning instead, but I had to quickly cross out the part warning me that a repeat occurrence of such misconduct would result in my dismissal.
I simply don't feel that the company treats their staff in an ethical way; most are trapped there by their own need for a wage, and in general those more shrewd trainees leave fairly soon. Sadly I wasn't amongst them, and I'm doomed to return for a six or eight-hour slog until I can find better work.
If you feel any of this is right, wrong or you have similar experience, email me: [email protected]
