Subject: Episode 6, "The Hidden
by J.
(c) 2000
Tron Malkaszar, a curious high elf -- Matt Grossman
Aran, paladin of a lost kingdom -- AJ Drexel
Norel Bolderdash, a hulking woodsman of the Adri forest
--
Nigil Palom, a noble from a far-distant land -- Kevin Osborn
All others --
The heroes are confronted with a rough hewn passage-way on the other
side of a secret door. It curves into darkness.
Tron: I'll lead.
Nigil: I'll keep a torch.
Aran: I have a lantern.
Tron: It branches left. I'm investigating... follow me.
Aran: Okay.
The elf suddenly senses a trap.
Tron: (runs full tilt into Nigil and Aran) Ohmygod!!! It's a trap!!!
We're all gonna die!!!
Nigil: We are?
Tron: (brushes himself off). Uhh, it's a dead end.
Aran: What was that about?
Tron: Nothing.
Aran: Ah. I see.
They continue further down until they come to another dead end. There,
they find a secret door set in an overhang. Tron opens it. On the
other side he sees a furnished room. Inside the room, a voluptuous
woman leans suggestively against a desk. A bald man scribbles
furiously for a moment, stops, bites the nib of his pen, mumbles for a
moment more, and then keeps scribbling. A hairless cat naps motionless
on a bookshelf. The room is lit by a number of torches. A large
diagram of a flayed humanoid sits on a tripod. It is clear that the
man is some sort of necromancer, perhaps the mastermind behind the
strange undead that the party has been fighting.
Tron: (carefully clambers out of the hole and begins sneaking towards the
bald man.) [klink]
Kitty: Hisssssss!
Man: Shhhhh. I'm trying to work.
Kitty: (leaps off shelf and attacks Tron)
Man: Damn it Mr. Bigl- hey!
Tron: (stabs bald man... and misses) Damn.
Man: (makes strange motions with his hands) Abracadabra!
Tron: Must... resist...
Aran and Norel climb through the hole. The kitty leaps viciously at
them and tears open Norel's chainmail, wounding him deeply. There is
something deeply frightening about the cat.
Norel:
Aran: Scary. So scary. So very, very scary. I think I'll just stand
here and contemplate this.
Nigil: I'm coming! Urg, ugh. Tight fit.
Tella: Hurry your fat ass! (shove)
Nigil: Agh. Through.
Kitty: Hissss!!!
Norel: Gotcha cat! Hmm. Tough cat. My weapon seems hardly to have bit.
Sexy woman: (bites deeply into Tron's shoulder)
Norel: Take that, evil bald guy!
Necromancer: Argh! Darkness!
Most of the room is suddenly cloaked in impenetrable darkness.
Nigil: Damn this cat! Ouch!
Kitty: (A hissing, biting, slashing, incredibly powerful tornado of
furlessness).
Aran: I'm free of the hairless beast's evil spell! Ha! (hacks into the
sexy woman's back from behind with his two-handed sword) Fiend!!!
Norel: Ouch! Cat bit me!
Tron: And me!
Aran: And me!
Skanda: And me!
Tella: I'll uhhh... guard the rear.
Norel uses his heightened sense, gained while in the orc mines, to
fight in the dark.
Norel: Get some! [hack]
Someone: Arrgggh!!! [thump]
Norel: Uhhh... who'd I get?
Necromancer:
Norel: Not so fast! (begins to messily remove head)
Aran: [whack] Gotcha!
Sexy Zombie: (falls apart)
Kitty: Meow. (slashes through Tron's puny armor)
Tron: Arrrgggggh!!! I'm dying! (collapses)
Skanda: So what's new?
Aran: This cat won't die! [hack]
Tella: Maybe hit it harder?
Skanda: Sigh. (heals Tron)
Nigil: My sword edge fails to bite. I'll try a morning-star.
Tron: Gasp. Try fire!
The heroes spend more than ten minutes trying to hack the cat into
little bits. They fail. Tron suggest four or five times that they "Try
fire." They don't try fire.
Tella: This is boring. (snags a torch from the wall). 'Scuse,
guys. Soooo... how do you make a cat sound like a dog? (pokes the
kitty with the lighted torch).
Kitty: Wooof!!! MRRRRRRReeeeooooooowwwwww!!
The other characters continue hacking at the cat with their weapons.
All are badly wounded by the strange cat's ferocious and powerful
attacks.
Aran: Wait a minute guys... there's something strange about this cat.
Tella: My boss, the genius.
Nigil: Tella, I have oil in my pack. Let's try that.
Tella: Hold still a moment. Got it.
They pour oil on the cat, but it simply leaps out of the pool of oil.
Tella: (drops torch in pool of oil) Damn! The cat got away.
Nigil drops his weapons, grabs the cat, and throws it into the burning
pool of oil.
Norel: Nice move.
Kitty: Ack. [burns]
Tron: Duh, duh, duh. Hey, wasn't that zombie Chantel? Mendel's wench?
Didn't he say she had run off?
Nigil: I'll be damned. You're right. That bastard.
Suddenly there is a sound outside the door of the room.
Voice through the door: [ahem] Uhhh... is uhhhh everyone dead?
Aran: No.
Voice through the door: Is Tarlech dead?
Aran: Tarlech?
Voice: The bald guy.
Norel: I cut his head off.
Voice: Okay. Can I come in?
Aran: (Opens the door, revealing a young, pale girl dressed in black
robes)
Arpad: Hi. My name's Arpad. You're pretty handsome. It's about time
you guys rescued me. Hi Tella. Yuck it smells in here. I see you got
that nasty little cat, too. I was captured from the keep. Did I mention
that you’re pretty handsome. Why does it smell like burnt cat? Do you
have a girlfriend?
Aran: Stop talking so fast!
Arpad: [blink blink]
Aran: What else is here?
Arpad: Nothing. Other than a few guards up the hall.
Norel: That's not nothing!
Arpad: Oh they won't harm anyone. They're just undead.
Aran: We're badly injured. We can't afford another fight.
Arpad: Well, like I said, just those guards with the prisoners.
Aran: Prisoners? I thought you said just the guards.
Arpad: Well, what did you think they were guarding? Themselves? Ever
since Wiggums got killed, I haven't had anyone to keep me company.
Norel: Did Wiggums happen to look like an owlbear?
Arpad: It's not very nice to hold that against him. He was my buddy.
Puddy-wuddy widdle Wiggums. Never hurt a soul. I haven't had anyone
except Spotty to keep me company since Wiggums died.
Nigil: Spotty?
Arpad: Spotty. He's fine as long as he's fed.
Norel: What is Spotty?
Arpad: My friend.
Aran: What does Spotty get fed?
Arpad: Oh, you know. This and that.
Norel: Can you be more specific?
Arpad: Metal or whatever. He likes it.
Aran: (contemplates his plate mail armor) Can you go tie Spotty up? If
you don't, we'll have to kill him.
Arpad: Okay.
Tron: Hey, uhhh, you haven't seen a mule have you?
Arpad: Tarlech didn't use mules.
Aran: How did you get here?
Arpad: Mendel cast some kind of spell on me and took me away. I'm not
sure why. By the way, there's a secret door over there. Tarlech kept
his spell book in a secret trap door in the roof behind it. If you
keep going you get to the temple where all the freaky priesty types
live. They visit a lot. They're even creepier than he is. Was.
Tron: Mendel? I bet he killed Knobby Foot.
Arpad comes back in a few minutes, bringing the starving prisoners
with her. The prisoners have been victims of some sort of foul
experiment in magic and starvation. The heroes feed them dried beef
and hardtack, and the prisoners lose their last few teeth trying to
gum the iron rations into submission.
The heroes quickly search the rest of the necromancer's cave. They
find a large library full of scrolls and books, but little
treasure. As it is late afternoon, they return to the keep. They forgo
a small, and now insignificant, reward from Devereau for the
necromancer's head and for the rescued prisoners. Arpad has a tearful
reunion with her father, Asham the Cooper.
Asham: I cannot thank you enough. Here is my thanks. (He holds out
three silver).
Aran: No, no --
Tron: No problem. Thanks for the cash. (pockets the silver)
Aran: (Passes Asham a purse with fifteen silver). Don't thank
me. Thank Hieronyous.
Asham: Uhhh... Sure.
The next day the heroes hire Jerrick, his brother Jed, and their
Ox-cart to return to the caves and haul away the necromancer's large
library. Arpad decides to lead Spotty back as a pet, despite being
worried that, "my parents didn't let me keep that puppy that one
time..."
Even as they set out on the road, they see a wounded child staggering
towards them. The child collapses almost at their feet.
Tron: (readies his bow and takes aim). It could be a trap!
Aran: It could be, but it's not.
He lays his hands on the child, and the
child, moments before near death, suddenly begin to bawl vigorously.
Aran: Shush child! -- shush! Who has done this? Stop crying this
instant and tell us!
Child: Wah! Wah!
Arpad: Can't you see? He's just scared. Shhhh... that's okay, that's
okay, cry on my shoulder. That's a good boy. Can you be a big boy and
tell us what happened?
Child: Sniff. Big monsters come and eat everybody and mommy and daddy
and nanny goat and everyone and and wah!!!!
Arpad: Shhhh... that's a big boy...
Child: Everyone eaten and fire everywhere by orcs and big things.
Tron: Orcs?
Arpad: I think he's from the little village down the road. It's about
two miles down the right, just south of the road, I think. There's a
little track. I've only been that far once or twice.
Jud, Jerick and Arpad return to the keep. The heroes continue down the
road to investigate. They find the village in ruins. A sickening
smell of burned human flesh hangs in the air. They spread out and
search the area.
Nigil: Not a living soul.
Tron: Actually, there was a dog with a broken spine. But I killed it.
Skanda: No kidding.
Norel: Tracks. Lots of 'em. Thirty or forty orcs, two giants -- one
very large, one smaller, and worgs. Also their human
prisoners. Eighteen hours old and heading north towards the river.
Tella: If they're eighteen hours old, they crossed the river many
hours ago.
Aran: We cannot catch them. We'd be throwing our lives away.
Tron: You didn't see mule tracks, by any chance?
They return to the keep. There, they train for several weeks.Tron
learns new techniques both as a warrior and a scout. Nigil
and Aran are both taught by Jadale. As the weeks slowly pass, spring
begins to slowly dawn across the frozen land. The ewes lamb, trees
begin to bud, and a thin fuzz of green begins to sprout across the
recently snowy earth. Nigil and Gabriel's sister Jola find themselves
attracted to each other and begin to spend the chilly spring
afternoons together strolling on the wall.
Nigil: Oh, beautiful Jola. Thy eyes are like a summer's rain. Wet.
Jola: Sigh.
Mouse: (whispering) Shhh... a bit closer... a bit closer.
Jola: Did you hear something?
Nigil: No.
Mouse: Cut with a quick flick of the wrist -- like so.
Tron: Got it.
Mouse: Very good.
Nigil: Say -- didn't I have my purse with me?
Jola: Someone stole my brassiere!
The heroes return to the Caves of Chaos on the 17th of Coldeven. It
has been close to three months since they escaped from the clutches of
the orc-slavers. They are strong, vigorous and ready for almost
anything. It is a fresh spring morning, and a low fog from the nearby
river and marshes has just burned off.
Aran: Let's investigate the necromancer's hideout and see if it has
been disturbed.
Norel: Wait -- fresh tracks.
A large, dog-headed humanoid stands on a nearby rise.
Tron: There! (nocks an arrow)
Nigil: Wait -- it's holding up its hand. Some sort of dog-man.
Norel: Gnolls.
Gnoll: Shnarfle gack woof growl gork.
Norel: Okay.
Tron: I think I understood it. It's a dialect of orcish, poorly
spoken.
Gnoll: (draws a human skull on the ground and then stops on
it). Long-bone-pig made by heap bad witch-doctor. You kill?
Tron: Yup. We killed heap bad witch-doctor.
Gnoll: Me called "Tammuz." Me flind, not gnoll. They (points at two
much smaller dog-men behind him) -- they is gnolls. Me is flind called
Tammuz. (draws even bigger skull on the ground and stomps on it) Me
want kill. (points at an arched cave entrance that the players have
avoided). Me helpy killy.
Tron: He says his name is Tammuz. He sounds smarter than the other
gnolls. He's glad we killed the bald guy, and from the sound of it,
wants to help kill more undead in there.
Tammuz the Flind: You help, you keep four finger coins. Gnolls keep one
finger coins and caves.
Tron: He says we get 80% and they get 20%.
Norel: Sounds like a good deal to me. How many of them do we have to
help?
Tron: You -- how many gnolls you have?
Tammuz: Many many. This many. (He indicates about 30 fingers
worth). Two heap big flinds.
Tron: About thirty, and two flinds like himself.
Aran: We could use the help.
Tron: Tammuz -- you get all here. When?
The flind points to the sky and motions the arc between noon and 1
pm. Then he takes off at a run, heading towards the southwest.
Tron: He says he'll return with reinforcements just after lunch.
Several hours later, Tammuz the Flind returns with
reinforcements. There are two more flinds with him. The flinds are
clearly highly dominant over the gnolls -- the gnolls are rowdy and
difficult to control, but clearly respect the flinds' superior
discipline, size and intelligence. Tron confers with Tammuz, and the
heroes come up with a plan -- they will sneak through the secret door
that leads from the necromancer's lair to the temple while the gnolls
storm through the front door. The heroes begin by sneaking through the
secret door. It leads into a mausoleum, full of strangely unrotted
corpses.
Skanda: There is something strange here. Let us move through quickly.
Tron: But I --
Aran: Not now. Loot the bodies later.
They move down a dark passageway. There is a locked door on the
right. Tron picks the lock, and they find a flight of stairs leading
down. The party moves silently down some stairs and leaps out to
surprise a man and a woman. They are wearing strange priestly garb.
While the two were clearly expecting trouble, it's also clear that
they are badly surprised. The woman is hacked down quickly.
Woman: Erishkagal take me... AAaaaahhhhh... [thump]
Man: Grrrrr -- not so fast. (wounds Norel with a single blow).
Norel: Arrgh. I am wounded.
Badly out-numbered, the man is killed moments later.
Man: Aiiiiii... Nerull be kind... [thud]
Aran: Look -- an evil book. The pages are unreadable -- they are all
black. This should be destroyed. (sets it on fire)
Skanda: Did you hear them call upon their dark gods? Erishkagal and
Nerull...
Aran: Indeed, this must be the temple I have been searching for.
The heroes quickly continue. From a great distance, they can hear the
sounds of a battle raging. They kill several human guards, then face
an unspeaking black knight with a bitterly wounding blade and a former
ranger turned to evil. It is hard fight, most of the heroes are badly
wounded, and Skanda's magic is drained. After recovering for a few
minutes, they continue on. They find two drugged acolytes playing some
form of strip chess.
Aran: Strange rites.
Norel: Let us continue up these stairs.
Tron: I'll guard the rear.
He waits for a few moments until the others have disappeared, and then
quickly hacks both of the chess players to death. The party returns.
Aran: There wasn't anything up there.
Norel: Uhhh...
Tron: What?
Norel: You're covered in blood.
Tron: Oh. You're right. Do you have anything I can wipe off with? Why
are you looking at me like that? They attacked me when I asked them
about Knobbyfoot.
The heroes climb another flight of stairs and find themselves in the
wreckage of a battle fought between gnolls and scores of undead. Gnoll
blood is spilled everywhere. Aran heals a badly wounded flind. From
down a broad, black and red floored passage way come the sounds of
continued battle. The heroes arrive just in time to see the last of
the skeletons fall. Over a hundred undead have been killed by the
gnolls. Six gnolls and one flind, Tammuz, are still standing. The
party searches the area and finds a number of human prisoners.
Skanda: Look -- prisoners for their sacrifices.
One of the prisoners is absurdly cheerful.
Jude: Hi, my name's Jude! Lovely day, isn't it? Gosh, so nice of you
to come and save us from certain death!
Norel: Is this guy for real?
Aran: I think so. Let us return to the small temple we saw on the way
here. There were zombie-guards in it.
Norel: Okay.
Nigil: Okay.
All quickly leave, heading down the passage way.
Tron: I'm just going to have a look around here... Hmm... a doorway hidden
behind this thick curtain. What could it be? Urp. Uh-oh.
After a few minutes...
Aran: Has anyone seen Tron?
Skanda: Nope. He was looking around.
Norel: Hmmmmm... We'd better search for him.
The party looks and soon finds the same concealed doorway that Tron
found. Behind it is a small room. A male and a female priest have
bound Tron. The female priest has a sharp-edged scythe held to his
neck.
Tron: Urk! Just do what they say!
Male: Move away. All of you. Or he dies.
Aran: If he dies, you die.
Male: We worship the true gods of death. Do you think we fear it?
Female: Step aside!
The heroes back away, and the two priests move quickly down the long
passage way. Aran waits at the main entrance, but they run quickly by,
dragging Tron with them.
Aran: Hey! Stop! Come back! (He begins running after them).
Suddenly, from two doorways, a horde of undead poor forth. Tron is
dropped, and the two priest sprint past the undead to safety. A long
battle ensues between the exhausted, badly wounded heroes and the
undead, but eventually they triumph.
Norel: It's too late to catch them.
Tron: Those bastards.
Nigil: At least you didn't get your throat cut...
A few minutes later, the heroes notice a door they had missed. The
surviving gnolls have fetched their women and children and all watch
the heroes closely.
Tron: I wonder what's in here.
They open the door and find Mendel the merchant cowering in the corner.
Nigil: Come here, scum bag.
Mendel: I was captured! It's so good of you to come rescue me!
Aran: Rescue you to be hanged by Devereau, anyway.
Tammuz: What you do with heap fat man?
Tron: Takey heap fat man to stone house for big man.
Tammuz: Big man eat heap fat long-pig?
Tron: No.
Tammuz: No?!?
He says something to the other gnolls, and they look very surprised.
Mendel: What are you talking about? Are you talking about me?
Tron: They want to eat him.
Tammuz: One figure you, four finger us.
Tron: They say we keep 20% of Mendel and they get the rest.
Mendel: What?! You can't leave me here! That's not fair!
Tron: Okay. Eat heap fat man, but we keep head for big man in stone
house.
Gnoll: Head best part, but okay. Growl. (draws sword and moves towards
Mendel)
Suddenly Aran leaps into action and decapitates the merchant. There
is much cheering and growling on the part of the gnolls. Tammuz and
the surviving flind immediately eat fat man's testicles.
Tron: Ugh.
Skanda: That was more than I needed to see.
The heroes return to the keep with news of their great victory in the
evening. A spontaneous party breaks out, with massive quantities of
alcohol for everyone. Tron arm wrestles Tella and beats her
soundly. The three middle-aged dairy maids dance on tables. Jess the
Barmaid ("I'm not a wench!") is half run off her feet, and gives up
after a few hours and simply hauls a few kegs up from the
cellar. Nigil and Jola retire when Gabriel isn't watching. Johann the
bard comes out of deep contemplation long enough to sing a few
songs. Many pass out on the floor. The heroes, exhausted by their long
day, retire after midnight with the party still raging below
them. Very late that night, their door is kicked open.
Jadale: You, elf, don't move!
Tron: Crap. I'm still drunk, or I'd be able to get away.
Sabine: You're under arrest.
Tron: What for?
Sabine: Devereau is dead. And your dagger was found with
him. Poisoned.
Tron: My dagger?
Thorlech: (from behind the guards) Yeah -- I seen him with it! It's
his!
Tron: My dagger was stolen a few weeks ago. I told Devereau and my
companions.
Jadale: A likely story.
Aran: Where are you taking him?
Jadale: To prison. There will be a trial tomorrow.
Tron is thrown into the prison tower in the
keep. Laurl and and Sabine keep a close eye on him throughout the
long night.
TO BE CONTINUED...