Episode 29
"A Mage Too Far"
(c) 2001 Matt Grossman and J. Sage Schreiner

Norel Bolderdash, hulking woodsman of the Adri forest -- Tom Morin
Nigil Palom, noble from a far-distant land -- Kevin Osborn
Keht, an unlucky monk -- AJ Drexel
Tron, a crafty scout -- Matt Grossman
Sapphire nee Tika, a courageous gnome -- Corey Paganucci
Rhahid, an ill-fated spell-crafter -- Eric Kruller
All others -- Sage Schreiner


The party gets back to Thorfinn's house and explains the situation to
him privately.

Thorfinn:  That's too bad.  We're planning to attack in two days, at
the dark of the moon.
Nigil: We want to go and see the hermit, Gylf, and see if he can do
anything for Skanda.  Also we want to see if he will agree to come
with us.
Thorfinn:  It will take you about two days to go to Gylf's isle and
back.  You can take the Osprim's Will, and rendezvous with us off the
coast of Niborg.

The party sets off for Gylf's island.  After arriving, they talk to
the hermit.

Nigil: ... and that's what happened.
Gylf: I cannot do anything for this one.  Her soul is now in the
keeping of her god.  However, I will ask Lendor for advice.

He goes off and meditates.

Lendor: My meditations tell me that there is unrest amongst the great ones.
Rhahid: Well, that is not very helpful.
Norel: Your clerical powers would be very helpful to Thorfinn during
the attack.
Gylf: Ehh, I'm too old, my legs are watery, my eyes are lame...
Nigil: No way!  You look like you're in great shape to me.
Sapphire: Look at the muscles on him!
Rhahid: Yes, he is clearly in the peak of health!
Gylf: You think so?
Nigil: Of course!
Gylf: Hmm, ok then.

He goes into the hut and emerges armed and armored.

Gylf: Let's go kick some!
Tron: We have to burn Skanda first. What's left, anyway.

They burn the straw-filled skin.  It burns quickly.

Gylf: I'd say some words, but she was a priest of a foreign god, so...

Tron: Pholtus!  Justice pleases you.  I ask one thing:  Grant us
revenge!  And if you will not help, then to hell with you!
Nigil: What he said!
Sapphire: That seems fair to me.
Norel: Skanda, rest in peace.  Your unhappy life is over now.  We will save
Myra, I swear it.

The party (and Gylf) reembarks on the Osprim's Will and, a day later,
rendezvous with Thorfinn's fleet off the coast of Nyborg.

Nigil: Here's the plan.  Using Rhahid's magic, we'll sneak into the
castle and kill the wizard.  We will light something on fire as a
signal to attack.  Then you can attack.
Thorfinn: Sounds like a plan.
Nigil: Gylf, you go with Thorfinn and back up the main attack.
Gylf: Heh, you mean I don't mean to lead the vanguard?  Wait, I have
to go pee...

Later that night...

On the walls of the castle...

Guard#1: ... so then she says...
Guard#2: ... laughter is the best form of birth control...

Rhahid: [splash]

Guard#2: Wait!  I thought I heard a boat.
Guard#1: (looks over the battlement) There's nothing there, dude.
Guard#2: Hmm, I guess so.

Nigil:  [thump clank]

Guard#2: Hey, did you hear that?  It sounded like somebody falling
down on the dock.
Guard#1: Nope.

Sapphire: [clank thump]

Guard#1: Hey, that sounded like somebody falling down on the stairs.
Guard#2: Yeah.  But there's nothing there.  I guess it's just ice
settling or something.

Meanwhile a shadowy figure has come onto the battlements and stands
staring down at the steps leading up from the harbor.

Tron: [whispers] She's still there.  It's that half-orc!
Keht: Well, she can't see us, or smell us.  So let's move.

The party circles around to the side of the castle.

Rhahid: Now, Hooter!

Hooter flies up to the top of the battlements, carrying a noose of
silk rope which she puts over the crenellations.  Then the party is
able to climb over the wall.

Tron: Wow, that owl is actually useful for something.
Rhahid: Bah.  Ok, Hooter, bring the rope down now.

Suddenly an arrow flies from the darkness and hits the owl.

Hooter: Hoo.

She flutters to the ground, badly wounded.

Keht: It must be that bitch!
Nigil: Let's move!  We know where the wizard's house is!

However, they cannot move from around Rhahid without becoming
visible.  Therefore, they can only move as fast as Sapphire.

As they round the keep and approach the wizards house, they see the
half orc on the wall.  Simultaneously she shoots and hits Nigil.

Nigil: Ow!
Rhahid: Stay together, guys!  That must have been just a lucky shot.

They continue to walk towards the wizards house.  Another arrow flies
near.  The woman whistles loudly and leaps off the battlements.

Tron: That's it. (runs for the house)

The party charges towards the house, leaving the field of invisibility
around Rhahid.  The fighters melee with the half-orc outside, while
Tron and Rhahid run inside.

Tron: He's not downstairs!

They run upstairs.  The door at the top of the stairs is closed, and
there is a note on it.

Tron: Hey Rhahid, what does this say?
Rhahid: Hmm... "Surprise"?

A spark flies from the note, hits the mage, and explodes into a
fireball.

Tron: Whoah! (ducks)
Rhahid: Ow ow ow ow!  Hot!  Oh no, Hooter!

The owl is clearly dead.

Rhahid: That is it!  I am fed up!  He is dead!  That mage is so dead!

Meanwhile, outside the house:

Sapphire: [chop hack] Die!
Half-Orc: Yaargh! [clang]
Nigil: Ouch!  Why me?

Keht: Hmm... time to use my monkey style!  Hiiiyaaaa!

The monk leaps at the wall of the house and climbs up to the second
floor, where he kicks in one of the shuttered windows.

Keht: Kiaah!  Ha.  A laboratory?

Tron and Rhahid burst through the door.

Tron: He must be in the other room!

Meanwhile, outside:

Norel: And stay down! [chop hack]
Half-Orc: Urgle. [thud]
Nigil: Finally!
Sapphire: (starts looting the body)

Upstairs:

Tron: No traps... (kicks the door open, revealing a bedroom.  It is
empty save for a few sticks of furniture and a trapdoor in the
ceiling)
Rhahid: [rattle rattle] It's locked!
Tron: Not for long! (starts hacking at the ceiling)
Keht: (runs into the laboratory and starts breaking through the
ceiling with his bare fists)

Downstairs:

Norel: There's nothing here, just a library, a dining room, and a
kitchen.
Sapphire: That woman just had this medallion.  And a nice two-handed
sword.
Nigil: I'm bleeding pretty bad.

Upstairs:

Tron: (crash) Nobody here!
Keht: (crash) He must have gone out the attic window!
Rhahid: (flies out the window, still invisible)
Wizard: [zort, zort, zort, zort, zort, zort]

Rhahid: Urk... Hooter, I'm coming to join you... [thud]

He falls to the snow, dead, and becomes visible.

Tron: Woah. (pulls the mage's body inside)  The wizard must be
invisible and flying too.
Keht: Well... (looks at the mage's feet, still encased in magical
boots)
Tron: He won't be needing them...
Keht: All your boot are belong to us!
Tron: Take off every boot!
Nigil: Set us up the boot!
Keht: I called it first!  They're mine!
Tron: Bah.

Sapphire: What are you guys doing?  What happened to Rhahid?
Norel: I guess this is how half-orcs show respect to a fallen comrade.
Nigil: And elves too.

Outside, the guards are starting to become alarmed.  Although they
don't seem to know exactly what is going on, it is clear that if the
party stays in the house much longer they risk becoming trapped.  They
decide to burn the house down and take over the gatehouse leading into
the inner keep, figuring that it is likely to be a strategic point,
and also one that is more defensible than the house.  They make a
quick search of house but don't find any valuables.  Tron snags a lead
medallion from the laboratory.

Norel: Rhahid sure would have liked all these books and stuff.
Sapphire: Maybe we can get him resurrected.

The attic window of the wizards house lies about four feet below the
walkway along the walls, so the party drenches the house with oil,
sets it afire, and starts to climb out.  There are a couple of guards
on the wall...

Tron: [twang twang]
Norel: [twang twang]  Clear!
Nigil: Go!  Go! (pushes Sapphire onto the walk and heads towards the
gatehouse carrying Rhahid's body)
Keht: (jumps up on the walk)
Norel: (jumps up on the walk)
Tron: (covering them)

As they move towards the gatehouse, Nigil suddenly drops Rhahid's body
and jumps off the wall.

Nigil: I surrender!  Don't hurt me!
Sapphire: Huh?  What's gotten into him?

Wizard: (casts Chain Lightning on Keht)
Keht: (burned to a cinder, he dies instantly)
Norel: Oww!
Sapphire: Oww!
Tron: Oww!

Two unfortunate guards inside the gatehouse are vaporized.

Norel: Get under cover! (drags Rhahid's and Keht's corpses into the
gatehouse)
Tron: (saw where the lighting came from and takes aim) [twang twang
twang]
Wizard: Oww! (still invisible, he floats away)
Tron: Wait for me!  (runs for the gatehouse)

Norel and Sapphire finish the guards inside the gatehouse.  Tron runs
inside and starts shooting at guards outside, while Sapphire goes up
on the roof.

Wounded Guard: (cowers in a corner, hoping she doesn't see him)
Sapphire: (walks towards wounded guard)
Wounded Guard: I... I surrender?
Sapphire: (guts him like a fish, then throws his corpse over the
battlements) Boo-yaa!

Nigil: What am I doing?  I never surrender... Help!  Don't kill me!
I surrender!

He runs over to one of the towers, dropping his sword as he does so.

Guard#1: Hey, this one wants to surrender!
Guard#2: Tie him up and throw him in the corner.  We'll kill him
later.

They do so.

Nigil: This sucks!  I'm glad I burned that wizard's house!

As smoke rises from the burning house, the party suddenly hears the
sounds of battle from outside the keep.  Thorfinn has arrived!

Tron: We're saved!
Norel: Or maybe not.

They fire at guards running across the outer courtyard, but are unable
to have any noticeable effect on the battle.  Soon they hear the
sounds of explosions and lighting strikes.

Sapphire: I guess with that wizard still alive, they're kinda screwed.
Norel: Yep.
Sapphire: We'd better figure a way out of this.
Norel: We should rescue Nigil.  He was obviously controlled by the
wizard somehow.
Tron: (pulling the boots off Keht's smoldering corpse)  Just let me
get a few things here...

TO BE CONTINUED...