Title: Any Way You Can
Author: Psy ([email protected])
Genre: Romance
Rating: PG-13
Band: Dir en grey
Pairing: Shinya and Kyo
Comments: Shinya finally tells Kyo exactly how he feels...and Kyo responds in kind.
Will Shinya like what he hears?
Any Way You Can
by Psy
Part Five
Startled, the drummer stumbled back a few steps. He certainly hadn't been
expecting Kyo to force his way into his hotel room. Shinya leaned against a
low dresser and nervously watched Kyo walk over to the bed and sit down.
Why is he here? Shinya asked himself. He sighed. I probably look
horrible...all that crying...
"Shinya," Kyo's voice brought him back to the here and now. "Come here.
Sit down."
Wiping at his reddened eyes, Shinya slowly approached the bed and sat
down as far from Kyo as he could get.
"I'm not gonna bite, Shin-chan! Geez!" Kyo exclaimed, reaching out to
take the drummer's slender arm and pull him closer. Shinya lost his balance
as Kyo yanked on his arm and fell face first into the vocalist's crotch. His
eyes widened and his cheeks burned with embarrassment. Why then, he wondered,
am I making no effort to move? And why isn't Kyo dragging me away by my hair?
The petite blond man just sat there while Shinya's face was pressed against
his crotch. After a few moments, Shinya felt a twitch and jerked his head
back up, quite surprised.
"G-gomenasai, Kyo," he stammered.
Kyo shrugged. "Shit happens."
Shinya nodded and the two men sat side by side on the bed for what seemed
an eternity, neither one speaking. Finally, Shinya turned his head to look at
Kyo questioningly. "Uh...didn't you want to talk about something?"
"Huh? Oh...yeah. Yeah, I did." Kyo took a deep breath. Better just get it
out quickly, he thought. "Shinya, do you have a thing for me?"
"What...what makes you ask that?" The younger man's voice cracked as he
forced the words out of his mouth.
"Because of what you said at the restaurant."
Shinya looked down at his hands. "Oh...that...well..."
"Just tell me the truth," Kyo said softly, almost pleadingly.
With a sigh, Shinya closed his eyes tightly. I can't tell him, I can't.
He moaned desperately inside his head. Kyo could never feel the same way.
Why is he asking me this? Is he going to start ridiculing me just like everyone
else? No, no, no. Kyo would never do that, but...but...He let out a loud
sigh. I'll never know for sure if I don't tell him. Shinya gathered his
courage and raised his head to look Kyo in the eye. However, he quickly
looked away. How could he be expected to think straight looking into those
beautiful brown eyes?!
"Shin...?"
"Yes!" Shinya suddenly burst out, cutting Kyo off.
Kyo's mouth hung open in mid-word and, okay, a bit of shock, and he
slowly closed it. "Hontou?" Shinya nodded. "Doushite?" Kyo asked, his voice
barely above a whisper.
"Well..."the drummer started slowly, his voice so low that Kyo had to
lean in to hear him. "I guess because we seem so alike in an odd sort of way.
I'm always in the background and I feel so left out and lonely and even
though you're always up front in everything, it doesn't make you feel any
less lonely. People don't know the real us...and I imagine not many people
would care to...at least with me." He paused and the vocalist opened his
mouth to speak, but decided against it. Better to let him get it all out, he
thought. "You're the only one who doesn't pick on me relentlessly. I
really...I really appreciate that, Kyo."
Kyo smiled a little. "I know how it feels. "
"I know," Shinya replied with a little smile of his own. "Now, you're
probably not going to believe what I'm going to say next, but please listen."
"Okay." Kyo raised an eyebrow, wondering what it was that Shinya was
going to say. He's probably gonna call me cute, and I swear if he does...I'll
kiss him again. He smiled inwardly at the thought.
"Well, I also...like...you because you're so talented. You can do
anything with your voice and you have a way with words that I'll never have.
And...and I think you're..." he took a deep breath and closed his eyes. "I
think you're gorgeous. You can be so cute (uh-oh, I've said the most evil
word I could! He's gonna skin me alive for sure!) and also so sexy that
sometimes I can't breath. I feel like I could drown in your eyes if I looked
into them for too long or be blinded by the brilliance of your smile, whether
it's an irritated little smirk or a full-blown grin. I...I can't help it."
Kyo sat there silently, taking it all in. He called me cute. He called me
sexy. Me? Sexy? He must have it bad...and why am I not tearing his skinny
little limbs off for calling me cute? Oh yeah. I was gonna...
Shinya's eyes widened with shock when Kyo leaned over and kissed him
deeply. Tears came to his eyes and he angrily shoved the smaller man away,
getting off the bed and standing by the dresser again.
"What?" Kyo asked, genuinely confused.
Tears slipped down Shinya's pale cheeks. He tried to wipe them away, but
they just kept coming. He had poured his heart out to Kyo, something he never
did for anyone, and this was how he was rewarded. "I thought I told you not
to do that unless you meant it! How could you?" His slender shoulders shook
gently as he cried.
"What makes you think I don't mean it?"
Shinya turned his head slowly. Kyo had stepped up next to him and reached
up to wipe away the drummer's tears. "Wh-what?"
Kyo smiled. "I didn't realize it until today, but I've had feelings for
you for a while now. I guess I just didn't want to admit it to myself, much
less to you. I've never felt this way about another guy before and...more
than that, I've been hurt so many times that I guess I didn't want to risk
it, you know? It seems we both were thinking the same thing."
"What's that?" Shinya asked quietly, not sure he was hearing correctly.
"We both thought that there was no way the other would feel the same
about us. We were wrong." Kyo took Shinya's head in his hands and pulled it
down gently, bringing the drummer's full lips to his own.
Shinya's heart soared. Kyo cared about him! He couldn't remember ever
being so happy. He wrapped his arms around the older man and returned the
kiss with a passion that took Kyo's breath away.
Moaning, Kyo ran his tongue along Shinya's lower lip, making the tall
drummer shudder with delight. He felt as if a huge weight had been lifted.
He felt free...free to love and be loved and not worry about it. A delicious
sensation went up his spine when Shinya's tongue shyly touched his lip ring
and then moved to touch the tip of his tongue. It was like electricity
surging through him. Soon their tongues engaged in a lustful battle and their
breath came in short rasping pants, their hands caressing here and there,
neither man sure of just how far to go.
The beautiful drummer felt like he was melting. It was so warm and safe
in Kyo's embrace. His tongue was like liquid fire as Kyo broke off the kiss
and licked along his neck and collarbone and back up again. He twined his
fingers in the vocalist's disheveled blond hair and arched his head back. He
let out a small whimper of protest when Kyo's lips left his skin.
"Shinya..."
So wrapped up in the moment, high on the knowledge that Kyo loved him,
Shinya hadn't been thinking at all about what they were doing...or the
position it had put both men in. He could feel his own sex painfully engorged
and glancing down at Kyo, could see that he, too, was hopelessly aroused.
"What do you wanna do?" Kyo asked.
"I...I don't know if I...if I'm ready for..."
Kyo nodded and patted his hand. "I know. Daijobu, ne. I don't think that
I'm ready for..." Kyo flushed and nervously cleared his throat. "Uh...you
know..."
Shinya smiled. Kyo was so cute! "Besides, we just now told each other how
we feel. It doesn't seem right to just jump into that."
Another nod from Kyo. "Honestly, I wouldn't know where to begin!"
"We'll learn together, Kyo." Shinya hugged the smaller man, felt his arms
come up around his waist, and sighed contentedly. His sigh turned into a yawn
and Kyo pulled back.
"Tired?" Shinya nodded and yawned again, laughing a little. "I can leave
if you want, so you can go to sleep," Kyo offered.
The sleepy drummer shook his head. "No...um...would you..." he was
suddenly afraid to ask, wondering if it was too much too soon. Kyo blinked at
him and waited patiently for him to finish his thought. "Would you sleep here
tonight? With me? Just sleep," he added quickly, his cheeks turning almost as
red as Die's hair.
Kyo grinned at the blush on Shinya's face. It was quite becoming, he
thought. He reached out and took Shinya's hand, leading him back to the bed.
"Sure, Shin-chan. I think I'd like that."
They both tried very hard to ignore their aroused states as they stripped
down to boxers and climbed into the queen-size bed. Shinya turned towards Kyo
and kissed him lightly on the lips. He smiled back and put an arm around the
younger man, drawing him closer.
"Kyo?"
"Hmm?"
"Aishiteru."
"Me, too, Shin-chan. I love me a lot."
Shinya whapped Kyo playfully on the head as the vocalist burst out
laughing.
"No, really," Kyo said just before they fell asleep in each other's arms.
"I love you, too."
Kaoru, Toshiya, and Die sat in the hotel restaurant eating breakfast, off
in their own little worlds. Kaoru was, for the millionth time this tour,
going over the itinerary sheet while desperately trying to ignore the fact
that Toshiya had draped an arm around his shoulders and was blowing in his
ear, whispering suggestive, provocative things. Die was sitting back,
munching on a bagel and thoroughly enjoying the play of expressions on
Kaoru's face, every now and then motioning Toshiya over to him and whispering
a suggestion of his own to the bassist, who would giggle and proceed to pass
it along to Kaoru. Soon, however, Toshiya got bored and left Kaoru alone.
"You are sooo boring, Kao-chan!" he complained. He picked at his
grapefuit and pouted.
Kaoru rolled his eyes. He didn't mind Toshiya playing around with him,
but it was damn hard resisting such tempting offers. But he didn't know if
Toshiya was serious at all and he wasn't about to risk making a fool of
himself, especially since it would get back to Die very quickly and he'd
never hear the end of it. He looked over at the other guitarist and frowned.
"Die, where do you suppose Shinya is? It's getting late. He's usually down by
now."
"Why do you assume I would know where he is?" Die asked.
Kaoru shrugged. "I don't know...but I wonder where he is..."
Die grinned and chuckled a little. "Ask Kyo."
Toshiya looked up from his grapefruit. "Ask Kyo?"
"Yeah. Here he comes."
Three heads (psy: one of which SHOULD be purple, the other of which
SHOULD be blue! But they aren't! *sobs*) swiveled around to see Kyo shuffle
his way into the restaurant and over to their table. He sat down next to Die
and rubbed at his eyes, trying to wake up. His arm was still asleep where
Shinya had slept on it and it wasn't exactly the most pleasant sensation.
We're gonna have to figure some other sleeping arrangement out, he thought as
he yawned. He reached for the coffee decanter and completely missed his cup
as his three other bandmates blurted out in unison: "Where's Shinya?!"
Kyo stared at the puddle of coffee on the table.
"Oops," Toshiya giggled.
Kyo slowly turned his head and glared at Die. "What did you tell them? I
swear to kami-sama if you said anything you've got a date with a bottle of
Nair!"
"Whoa! Chill out!" Die's eyes filled with fear. "I didn't say a thing!
That's your job!"
The vocalist narrowed his eyes and then decided to believe him. He was in
too good a mood to stay mad anyway.
"Tell us what?" Toshiya wondered aloud, not directing the question to
anyone in particular.
"I'll tell you when Shinya gets down here," Kyo informed them.
"He's...uh...probably in the shower." He shifted his eyes from side to side
and let out a fake cough. Die chuckled, figuring that Kyo knew exactly what
Shinya was doing. He looked a lot happier than he had last night. The
guitarist leaned over to him.
"I take it things went well?"
Kyo beamed at him and nodded his head so hard it looked like it'd detach
and roll away. Die laughed and Kaoru and Toshiya gave the both of them a
funny look, hopelessly confused. Kyo busied himself wiping up the coffee he'd
poured on the table and then pouring some into the actual cup this time. A
few minutes later Shinya appeared in the entryway and, spotting Kyo, smiled
shyly and walked over to the table. Kyo looked up from his cup and grinned
like a lovestruck schoolboy at the drummer and pulled out the chair next to
him, causing Toshiya and Kaoru to give him another odd, confused look.
"Can I tell?" Kyo asked his new koi.
Shinya looked surprised. "You want to? This soon?" Kyo nodded
emphatically. Shinya smiled. He'd never seen Kyo look so happy. Come to think
of it, he couldn't remember the last he himself had felt so happy. "Okay. Go
ahead."
Still grinning, Kyo stood up and placed a hand on Shinya's shoulder.
"Members of Dir en grey, I am going to blow you all away." Toshiya and Kaoru
stared at him, dumbstruck, and Die merely sat back and smiled.
"O-okay," Kaoru said nervously.
Kyo leaned down and kissed Shinya, slipping his tongue into the drummer's
mouth, causing him to gasp a little. He hadn't said he was gonna do that!
Toshiya dropped the spoon he'd been holding and gaped at them. Kaoru dropped
the itinerary sheet and gaped at them. Die clapped.
"Wh-what's going on?" Kaoru asked shrilly.
"Shinya and I are officially a couple." Kyo announced proudly.
"Wow," Toshiya breathed. "Who saw that one coming?!"
"Me," Die answered. Toshiya swatted at him, causing him to laugh.
Kaoru sat stunned. He looked over at Toshiya. Maybe...he thought, not
finishing the thought that danced around in his head. Instead he turned back
to Kyo and Shinya. "Congratulations, guys. I'm happy for you."
Toshiya nodded in agreement and the newly formed couple grinned back at
them. Their new relationship was the topic of the rest of that morning's
conversation, but although he really was happy for them, Kaoru couldn't hold
back the hint of jealousy he felt. Shinya and Kyo were happy. Both with the
person they loved. Would he ever be that lucky?
~owari~
______________________________________________________________________________
I hope everyone enjoyed this story. I want to thank Lady Sakura for all the
wonderful things she said about my story, this being my first attempt at
yaoi. I'm so glad you liked it. Big hugs to you. I know this story is
actually pretty mild, but I'll write some spicier stuff down the line.
In case you hadn't noticed, I left some hints here and there about Kaoru and
Toshiya. I am planning a sequel starring the two of them. That is, of course,
if there's any demand for that. Until next time!