You're idea of a traffic jam is ten cars waiting to pass a tractor on the highway.
"Vacation" means going to Six Flags or Branson.
You've seen all the bands ten years after they were popular.
You measure distance in minutes.
Down south to you means Tennessee.
You know several people who have hit a deer.
You think Missouri is spelled with an "a" at the end. Missoura.
Your school classes were cancelled because of cold.
Your school classes were cancelled because of heat.
You've ridden a bus to school for an hour each way.
You've had to switch "heat" to "A/C" in the same day.
You think ethanol makes your truck "run a lot better."
You've seen people wear bib overalls to funerals.
You see a car running in the parking lot at the store, with no one in it, no matter what time of year.
You know in your heart that Mizzou can beat Nebraska in a football game.
You end your sentences with an unnecessary preposition. Ex: "Where's my coat at?" or "If you go to the mall, I wanna go with."
All the festivals in the state are named after a fruit, vegetable or grain.
You install securtiy lights on your house and garage, and leave both unlocked.
You carry jumper cables in your car, and know that everyone else should.
You know what "cow tipping" or "Possum Kicking" is.
You only own 4 spices; salt, pepper, garlic and ketchup.
You design your child's Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit.
You think everyone from a bigger city has an accent.
Your local paper covers national and international headlines on one page, but requires 6 pages for sports.
You think I-44 is pronounced "foarty-foar."
You think deer season is a national holiday.
You know which leaves make good toilet paper.
You find 105 degrees F a little warm.
You know all four seasons: Almost Summer, Summer, Dead of Winter, and Construction.
You know if another Missourian is from eastern, middle, or western Missouri as soon as they open their mouth.
You failed world geography in school because you thought Cuba, Versailles, California, Nevada, Houston, Cabool, Louisiana, Springfield, and Mexico were cities in Missouri. (Which they really are, but that's not the point here!)
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