IN THE  FLICKS

Things you would never know without movies:

·     Large, loft-style apartments in New York are well within the price range of most people - whether they are employed or not.

·     Should you decide to defuse a bomb, don't worry which wire to cut. You will always choose the right one

·     Most laptop computers are powerful enough to override the communications system of any invading alien society.

·     It does not matter if you are heavily outnumbered in a fight involving martial arts - your enemies will wait patiently to attack you one by one by dancing around in a threatening manner until you have knocked out their predecessors.

·     When you turn out the light to go to bed, everything in your bedroom will still be clearly visible, lust slightly bluish.

·     If you are blonde and pretty, it is possible to become a world expert on nuclear fission at the age of 22.

·     Honest and hard-working policemen are traditionally gunned down three days before their retirement.

·     Rather than wasting bullets, megalomaniacs prefer to kill their arch-enemies using complicated machinery involving fuses, pulley systems, deadly gases, lasers, and man-eating sharks, which will allow their captives at least 20 minutes to escape.

·     During all police investigations, it will be necessary to visit a strip club at least once.

·     All beds have special L-shaped cover sheets that reach up to armpit level on a woman but only to waist level on the man lying beside her.

·     All grocery shopping bags contain at least one stick of French bread.

·     Once applied, lipstick will never rub off - even while scuba diving.

·     You're very likely to survive any battle in any war unless you make the mistake of showing someone a picture of your sweetheart back home.

·      Should you wish to pass yourself off as a German or Russian officer, it will not be necessary to speak the language. A German or Russian accent will do.

·      The Eiffel Tower can be seen from any window in Paris.

·      A man will show no pain while taking the most ferocious beating but will wince when a woman tries to clean his wounds.

·      If a large pane of glass is visible, someone will be thrown through it before long.

·      If staying in a haunted house, women should investigate any strange noises in their most revealing underwear.

·      Word processors never display a cursor on screen but will always say, 'Enter Password Now'.

·      Even when driving down a perfectly straight road, it is necessary to turn the steering wheel vigorously from left to fight every few moments.

·      A detective can only solve a case once he has been suspended from duty.

·      If you decide to start dancing in the street, everyone you meet will know all the steps.

·      Police departments give their officers personality tests to make sure they are deliberately assigned a partner who is their total opposite.

·      When they are alone, all foreign military officers prefer to speak to each other in English.