10 WORDS THAT DON'T EXIST, BUT SHOULD: 

~Matthew

1. AQUADEXTROUS (ak wa deks' trus) adj. Possesing the ability to turn
the bathroom tap on and off with your toes. 

2. CARPETUATION (kar' pur pet u a shun) n. The act, when vacuuming, of
running over a piece of string or lint at least a dozen times, reaching
over and picking it up, examining it, then putting it back down to give
the vacuum one more chance. 

3. DISCONFECT (dis kon fekt') v. To sterilise the lolly you dropped on
the floor by blowing on it, assuming this will somehow 'remove' all the germs.

 4. ELBONICS (el bon' iks) n. The actions of two people maneouvring for
one armrest in a movie theatre. 

5. FRUST (frust) n. The small line of debris that refuse to be swept
onto the dust pan and keeps backing a person across the room until he finally
decided to give up and sweep it under the rug. 

6. LACTOMANGULATION (lak' to man gyu lay' shun) n. Manhandling the the
"open here" spout on a milk container so badly that one has to resort to the
'illegal' side. 

7. PEPPIER (pehp ee ay') n. The waiter at a fancy restaurant whose sole
purpose seems to be walking around asking diners if they want ground
pepper. 

8. PHONESIA (fo nee' zhuh) n. The affliction of dialling a phone number
and forgetting whom you were calling just as they answer. 

9. PUPKUS (pup' kus) n. The moist residue left on a window after a dog
presses its nose to it. 

10. TELECRASTINATION (tel e kras tin ay' shun) n. The act of always letting
the phone ring at least twice before you pick it up, even when you are
only six inches away.