Why won't that buzzing stop? They know its there, they know its not just me. All it would 
take is one phone call. I suppose that would be asking too much of the flabby arm of my 
suporvisor. "Shawn!" he yellls from across the room, "are you taking your break again? 
Because, I could swear so far you've used today's break, tomorrows and yesterday's twice." 
I sucked it up, I'm not a complainer "No, sir." I turned to the monitor, thinking of all 
the ways I could have told him off, and started scanning the lines, looking for the bracket 
or semi-colon I misplaced. I see him coming towards me so I try to type something, erase 
it, and then type it again to make it look like I've spotted something and fixed it. "You 
might want to think about installing a privacy screen," my boss advises over my shoulder, 
"so your co workers won't be distracted by all the 'girly' sites you're looking at." Thats 
when I tell him its an emai-"Yeah, I don't care what it is. Just see that its off the 
screen in 3 seconds." I quickly stand up and turn to him, "What?" He says condiscendingly 
and expecting me to start a NHL style brawl. I lock into his eyes "What exactly is it that 
you disaprove of? The fact that I listen to you or the fact that I do a good job? What 
exactly is your job here anyway? Don't you have anything better to do? Is the fact that I 
took 5 minutes to stretch my neck whats keeping you from being promoted?" were just some of 
the things I was thinking of while I stared at him blankly. "Yeah, thats what I thought. 
Get to work, Earlacker." I angrily sat down feeling frustrated and just a little turned on 
by the fact he thought I had girly sites on my computer. In fact, I started to wish I was 
looking at girly sites. So there I sat, back to scanning the lines of code for one misplaced 
character. The little snag that provented my comic hypnotist career from getting the 
financing it deserved. You see, they only pay us here when our programs actually work. I 
guess thats why I'm broke. "You going to eat those?" Cyg asks me. "If you want to call it 
food you can have it." 
"I sincerely thank you and might I say I never seen him get to you like that before."
"Him?" I look at my boss as he begins another motivational speech to an empoyee across the 
room, "He's just-..."
"Fuck'em, he's probably mad cuz you're sleeping with his wife."
"Yeah, ten dollars will get you anything these days."
"If I were you, I would quit this shit hole job. You see the way I look at it, you're only 
here because you think you deserve a shit hole job."
"So my problem is self esteem..."
"Basically. If you wanted to tell that sleezy dick you call Sir and salute with your middle 
finger to shove it up his ass in ways he's never fantasized about, you could do it. And I 
would respect you for it. No one wants a job like this. You could be getting paid 5 times 
you make now working at Microsoft, or... MacDonalds."
"Then why are you here?"
"Same reason as you."
"You have a crush on the copy girl, too?"
"Yes, but besides that point, your self esteem issues are rivaled in complexity only by your 
humble therapist's mind. Allow me to explain if I may..."
"By all means."
"You see at Microsoft I would be an entry level programer. I'd have ot work on the guidance 
system. They would slap training wheels on my dick and force me to write machine code to 
speed up someone else's shit. The boss would be a good boss, a frirendly boss, the boss that 
wants to be your buddy. And projects would move with the quickness of a taught young 
ukranian gymnast."
"But you don't go for that."
"Not in the slightest sense. I like to wollow in the chaos and utter ineffeciency that this 
organization is pumping out like so much gas from a 40 year old on a diet of broccoli and 
cabbage. I'm much happier here than I would be at Microsoft."
"So being all you can be isn't your main driving force."
"Nope, not like you. I can see that you're only here because you have to be in order to 
hypnotize people and make them do silly shit. Which oddly isn't that different from what you 
see here everyday." Cyg looks across the room to see the boss making some poor girl do 
pushups. "Now that would be your main driving force. My main driving force is surrounding 
myself with little people, petty minds and small dreams. Here, I'm practically a god."
"I finally understand why you had that baby sitting job for so long."
"That was only the start my friend, only the start."
"And here I am telling everyone it was because you were a pedophile."
"Don't feel bad about getting me arrested, police just have no sense of humor."
"Amen."