Title:  Crystal Rain

Author:  Joolz

Feedback:  If you like J [email protected]

Category:  Slash, First Time, Hurt/Comfort, Angst, Danny-whumping

Pairing:  Jack/Daniel

Season/Spoilers:  Late 4^th, light spoilers up till then.

Summery:  Sometimes when it seems that it can’t get any worse, that’s when your life turns around.

Notes: This story was won by Krystalrain in the Moonridge charity auction.  She gave me an extensive list of elements she wanted included, and let me have the fun of working it out.  I didn’t get them all in, but close!  Er, somebody may want to ask her about the broken wrist fetish!  ;)

Many thanks to Catspaw and Shazz for helping to make this better.  Of course, the final product is all my responsibility.

Warnings:  graphic m/m sex, language, unkind words between the guys

Disclaimer:  Not my lovely characters, just playing with them.

 

 

~~*~~

 

Crystal Rain

By Joolz

 

In the hour of adversity be not without hope,

For crystal rain falls from black clouds.

~Nizami Ganjavi

 

 

Deep under Cheyenne Mountain Jack sat at his desk with a pad of blank requisition forms in front of him.  Instead of filling them out he was drawing a small circle with his pen.  Repetition of the motion had already eaten through three layers.

 

Jack wasn’t a happy camper.  Everything was going to hell in a hand-basket and it was all Daniel’s fault.  The scientist was impossible, that was all.  Nobody could be expected to put up with the kind of crap Daniel dished out.   No other commanding officer would have lasted half this long under the same conditions.  Jack thought that he deserved another medal for sacrifice above and beyond the call of duty.  It was time to give himself a break and accept the inevitable. 

 

So why then did his stomach cramp at the thought of losing Daniel?

 

He replayed that last argument once again.

 

Jack had been sitting at the same desk reading SG-5’s latest mission report when he noticed a dark bulk hovering in the doorway.  The six foot tall archaeologist in baggy fatigues filled the frame but didn’t come in.  Jack glanced at him and back at the page.  “Daniel?”

 

The other man seemed nervous.  He spoke quickly and appeared ready to bolt.  “SG-9 is taking a group of anthropologists to PZ4-145 to study a temple which combines elements of several major Earth religions.  I’m going with them.”

 

The flash of anger that shot through him made Jack react with exaggerated control.  He placed the report on his desk and slowly turned to look at his teammate.  “Is that so?  I notice that you’re not asking me, your commanding officer, if I am willing to authorize this absence from your primary duties.  Again.  I’m detecting a pattern here, Daniel.  You don’t seem to have any respect for me or for the team.  Are we boring you?”

 

Daniel’s face flushed and Jack thought that he might turn and walk away, but instead he stepped into the room and closed the door behind him.  He faced Jack and answered in a tight voice, “I was under the impression, Jack, that it was you who had no use for me.  I don’t want to get into anything right now; I’m just making it easy for you to avoid my presence.”

 

“Me avoid your presence?  You’re the one looking for any excuse to go off with another team.  I’d say that you’re bailing on us.”

 

 “Well you’ve certainly made it clear that you can get along just fine without me.”

 

“Yeah, Daniel, we can.  But I can’t say the same thing about you.  You’re a disaster everywhere you go.  You can’t even attend a funeral without getting ribboned and letting a Goa’uld escape.”

 

Daniel opened his mouth and huffed an indignant breath.  “Oh!  The way I remember it you hung up on me.  For some strange reason I thought you and Teal’c would help.  If you had been there maybe we could have saved Sarah from being a host.  But no, you had more important things to do than try to help someone I care about, things like fishing.  So what else is new?”

 

Jack bristled. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

 

“I spent years trying to rescue Shau’ri from the Goa’uld, but despite your promise to find her, that was never a priority for you was it?  You were more interested in weapons and ways to destroy the enemy than in the suffering of one woman.  She was just collateral damage to you, wasn’t she?”

 

Jack stood up but kept the desk between them.  “Now wait just a minute!  You’re going to blame me for Shau’ri’s death?  That’s rich.  If you had obeyed orders that day instead of running off on your own we might have been able to capture Amaunet and free your wife.  But you couldn’t wait.  You went in without backup and got yourself into a position where Teal’c had no choice but to shoot her.  Way to go Danny-boy!”

 

Daniel blinked at Jack with his mouth open.  “W..w..w…  That’s just!”  The younger man made a visible effort to bring himself under control.  He continued in a quiet but dangerous voice, “If that’s what you think of me then maybe I shouldn’t be on your team.”

 

Jack couldn’t help lashing out.  “Maybe you shouldn’t.  Not everything’s about you, Daniel.  I need a team player, not someone who’s always so sure he’s right that he doesn’t listen to anyone else.  Go play with SG-9, and good luck to them.”

 

Daniel’s nose was wrinkled in fury but he answered calmly. “Fine.  When I get back I’ll arrange for a transfer.”

 

“I’ll get the paperwork started.  Just don’t expect me to come pull your nuts out of the fire the next time you get captured by an Unas.”

 

“Oh, I won’t.  Wouldn’t want to give you the chance to kill another of my friends.”

 

That was the last straw.  Jack was about ready to blow his top big time.  “Get. The. Fuck. Out. Of. My. Office!”

 

Daniel snarled, “With pleasure!” and threw the door open with a bang.  Jack stood staring at the empty doorway for several minutes while he tried to stop his body from shaking.  Something had happened there, something irrevocable.  Jack felt like he had just lost his best friend.

 

 

At his desk Jack pressed harder with his pen, tearing the thin paper.  It still hurt to think about it.  How it had happened was all wrong, but maybe the outcome was right.  Maybe Daniel shouldn’t be on the team.  Never in a million years would he have a conversation like that with a military subordinate.  It was out of hand.

 

Of course, Daniel had never been his subordinate.  Daniel was his equal or even superior in every way.  That’s exactly why it had become so intense between them.  There was no one else who treated Jack like a man, rather than an officer.  No one else who challenged him.  Jack sighed.  No one else it was safe to be himself with.  That’s why Daniel had become so important to him.

 

And that’s why he got so angry.  Daniel didn’t want to be with them, with him, anymore.  He seemed to spend half his time with other teams, and when he was with SG1 he defied Jack at every opportunity.  He never hung out with them after hours any more.  He was pulling back and going in a different direction.  Jack thought that he should let Daniel go, let him find his own way, but it just felt so wrong.  They were a team!  Yes, with Carter and Teal’c they were SG1, but even before that he and Daniel had been a team.  They’d gone to Abydos together, defeated an alien god together.  Now Daniel had outgrown him, didn’t want him anymore.

 

Pushing the requisition pad away, Jack laid his head down on the desk.  He hadn’t meant one word of what he’d said to Daniel in that argument.  Not one word.  He’d been angry and hurt and had lost control.  Everything was so personal with them.  When Daniel saved Jack’s life it was personal.  When they disagreed it was personal.  It would be wrong to try to hold Daniel on the team when Jack couldn’t keep an emotional distance.

 

Not that it mattered much what he thought.  Daniel had made it clear that he distrusted and disliked Jack.  This was it.  It was over and done.  Life was going to suck even more from now on.

 

 

~~*~~

 

Daniel sat in the dark with sweat beading on his forehead as pain swept up his arm like flames.  He concentrated on taking slow, deep breaths, preferring, if at all possible, to avoid throwing up again.  At least the last shower of dust and rock had covered the mess.

 

The archaeologist was trapped in a pocket underneath the collapsed temple.  There was a good bit of space around him so he could stretch and bend his legs and sit upright leaning against the cool stone block as he waited.  The fact that his left arm was trapped between that stone block and a fallen slab meant that that was all he could do. 

 

The arm extended straight out from the shoulder, disappearing between the two solid surfaces.  Of course he couldn’t see, but it was clear to him that there was some irregularity, a ridge or lump, on the slab just at the level of his wrist.  Something was pressing at that point and had, he was quite sure, broken several bones.  He had tried to pull his arm free and that was when the contents of his stomach had met the floor.  He couldn’t feel his hand, which was probably a good thing.

 

The air was thick with dust that hung heavily around him, increasing his incipient claustrophobia.  With his free hand Daniel rubbed the grit out of his eyes and wiped his forehead where the grime had stuck to a sheen of sweat.  He felt buried alive, living in the underworld like Persephone.  The question was, would he rise again in the spring? 

 

He was breathing the long dead history of this world, shattered beyond recovery. How all these different faiths had come to be integrated in one temple was a question they would now never answer.  Whether it represented an association of Goa’uld making use of various mythologies, or a colony of divergent cultures which had learned mutual respect, they would never know.  When the answers were silenced, of what import was the questioner?  For Daniel, the search for understanding was reduced to what was inside his own head, which seemed a lonely and limited place.

 

More immediately, there was physical survival.  To control the pain, the budding panic and the physical discomfort, he fell back on half-learned meditation techniques.  With each slow in-breath Daniel tried to think a positive thought.  One, he hadn’t been killed outright in the collapse.  Two, aside from a number of bruises left by falling debris, only his arm was injured.  Three, his entire arm wasn’t squashed flat (yet); the damage seemed limited to his wrist.  Four, there was enough oxygen that he wouldn’t suffocate.  Five, he believed that the others had all gotten out safely.

 

It was a short list of positive thoughts.  On the out-breath the negative thoughts sneaked in unbidden.  It was a big temple.  If anyone was trying to find him it could take weeks.  It could be that no one was trying to find him- they might think him dead or that the task was impossible.  Assuming he was eventually rescued, depending on how damaged his wrist was he might lose his hand.  Even if he was rescued and didn’t lose his hand, it was all over anyway.  Jack had made that quite clear in their last conversation, so what did it matter?

 

And it hurt.  It hurt so much he wanted to cry or scream. 

 

Daniel leaned his head against the stone that was crushing his arm and closed his eyes.  It was all Jack’s fault, he brooded.  If Jack hadn’t made him so angry Daniel wouldn’t have been in the temple at all.  The small detail that Jack wasn’t even on the planet was insignificant.  Everything was Jack’s fault just on principle. 

 

He slumped forward in despair.  Jack’s fault.  He couldn’t convince himself of that.  It was his own fault.  He had done something wrong and that was why Jack was acting the way he was.  Maybe Daniel had argued with him one too many times.  Maybe the soldier had just had it with his civilian encumbrance.  Maybe he was a worthless screw-up.    Maybe their ‘friendship’ had no fucking foundation.

 

It hadn’t always been this way.  He remembered how Jack used to look at him and listen to him.  How Jack used to trust him and touch him and call him ‘space-monkey’.  That was when their friendship had become something more for Daniel, and it was a friendship then, he was sure of it.  They had been through so much together, things that no one else could understand, that a bond had formed despite their differences.  There were times when everything seemed unreal, everything except Jack. 

 

Jack had become the cornerstone of his life, his personal life that he kept hidden far inside.  People thought that all he did was work.  Dr. Jackson: sought out when someone needed him to do something, invisible the rest of the time.  The only one who had really seen him was Jack, who went to the trouble of shaking him out of his obsession with work, who understood it for what it was – his way to avoid dealing with things that were too painful to face.  Jack had offered himself as an alternate distraction, had in fact insisted upon it.

 

Maybe that was the problem.  He had come to depend on Jack, to need him, and in doing so had taken more than what was offered.  Maybe, since Jack could read him so well, he knew that Daniel felt… strongly… about him and didn’t want that.  Didn’t want him.

 

At that thought anger rose again.  Damn Jack O’Neill for not wanting him!  Was he that useless?  Wasn’t there anything Daniel could do to be good enough in Jack’s eyes?  Apparently not.

 

It was cold and getting colder.  He couldn’t move around to keep warm, and the fingers he could still feel were getting numb.  On top of everything, hypothermia was a possibility.

 

Positive:  If he died under that mountain of broken stone Jack would be sorry (or was that a negative, self-pitying thought?).  He would be sorry that Daniel was dead; he would feel guilty.  Sam would be sorry, and Teal’c.  Maybe General Hammond and Janet.  But if he wasn’t there to be useful any more they would move on quickly.  Out of sight, out of mind. 

 

His morbid train of thought was broken by an ominous shifting of the debris above him.  Daniel tensed and held his breath.  It wasn’t only the possibility of imminent death, it was that sound again.  The grinding of stone against stone.  The creak of weight and mass out of balance.  It was the same sound….

 

Eight years old.  The Museum of Fine Arts in New York City.  His parents directing the installation of the exhibit they were so proud of.  There was a sound of stone grinding against stone.  A creak and rumble.  And then the stones fell and his parents were dead. 

 

Daniel’s heart contracted.  At that moment he felt more compassion for his parents than he ever had before.  They wouldn’t have wanted to leave him.  They, unlike Daniel now, had someone to live for.  But they couldn’t have stopped what happened any more than Daniel could change his current situation.  At least it had been quick.  They didn’t have time to wallow in regret.

 

Negative:  Having time to wallow in regret.

 

 

~~*~~

 

Jack sat up quickly when the klaxon began to blare.  ‘Unscheduled off-world activation.  I repeat, unscheduled off-world activation.’

 

Pulling himself together resignedly, Jack got to his feet.  He would go see what was happening.  It was his job, and his job was all he had left.

 

When Jack entered the control room the ‘Gate was already open but they were waiting for the IDC.  After a moment the technician turned to the General and said, “It’s the team on PZ4-145, sir.  They aren’t due to check in again until tomorrow.” 

 

The base commander’s blue eyes flashed concern.  “Open the iris.” 

 

He turned to O’Neill.  “Let’s go see what’s happened now.”

 

Jack took the stairs two at a time and made it into the Gate Room just as a woman in green fatigues sprang onto the ramp.  As she hurried down to meet them Jack kept watching the blue circle waiting for Daniel to follow, but it blinked out of existence.  Jack frowned at the piece of machinery as though it were at fault.  Then the woman’s breathless voice drew his attention.

 

Hammond had asked, “Dr. Cresida, to what do we owe this unscheduled visit?”

 

“General, Colonel, there’s been an accident.  The temple we were studying collapsed suddenly.  There was no warning.”

 

Jack looked at her sharply.  The scientist’s shoulder-length black hair was dusted with a fine powder, and she looked like she had been running.  He didn’t wait for the general to ask anything else.

 

“And Daniel?”

 

Dr. Cresida, her first name was Joan, he remembered, looked at him with wide eyes.  “I was working in the same chamber as Dr. Jackson.  We were taking rubbings of some deteriorating inscriptions when suddenly he froze and looked up.  It was like he heard something, though I didn’t.  He grabbed his radio and ordered everyone to leave their gear and get out of the building.  I tried to ask him why but he actually shoved me toward the exit and yelled, ‘Get out now!’  That wasn’t like Dr. Jackson.  He’s always so professional.”

 

Jack was growing impatient and more than a little worried.  “Cut to the chase, doctor.  What happened?”

 

That earned him a glance of admonition from his superior officer, but he didn’t care.  He had a bad feeling about this.

 

The woman went on.  “I left, but Dr. Jackson went farther into the temple.  Apparently he didn’t think that the others would drop what they were doing and move fast enough just on his order.”  Jack grimaced, knowing exactly how that felt.  “The others came out one by one, but then…”  She looked at Jack with sudden tears swimming in her eyes.  “The whole thing collapsed like a deck of cards.  It happened so fast!  It wasn’t until Major Taylor counted heads that we realized Dr. Jackson wasn’t there.  He was still inside when it happened!  We think he was looking for Dr. Fisk, but Bernard was down at the latrine.”

 

At that moment it was like Jack stepped out of his body.  He felt nothing. 

 

General Hammond asked, “Where are Major Taylor and his team?”

 

“They stayed to begin searching for Dr. Jackson.  Sir, that temple was huge!  We don’t even know where he was or if he could have possibly survived.  He made sure that everyone else got out, why didn’t he?  Why did he have to take that risk?”

 

Hammond laid a comforting hand on her arm.  “Because that’s the way Dr. Jackson is made.  As much as we would like it, we don’t expect him to think of himself first.” 

 

The older man turned to Jack.  “Colonel, organize the rescue team.”

 

“Yes, sir.”  He turned on his heel and began giving orders, not totally aware of what he was saying.  Within minutes Carter and Teal’c were there to help.  His 2IC’s face was pinched with worry while the large warrior simply looked more implacable than usual.  Jack went through the motions, a part of him already dead.

 

 

~~*~~

 

At first Daniel had been glad to be able to sit up, but now he would have given anything to be able to lie down.  The nausea hadn’t passed, nor had the cold sweat and light-headedness.  The whole left side of his body hurt from the awkward angle at which his arm was trapped.  And the arm itself?  Even Daniel had no words to describe the pain.  He recognized that he was shocky, and knew that he was supposed to elevate his feet, but that was hardly possible.  He semi-seriously considered gnawing his arm off like an animal caught in a snare, but since there was no way out it wouldn’t really help anyway.  The absurd thought made him giggle, which bumped the pain up another notch.

 

Daniel used the time constructively, as far as it was possible.  Obviously something other than his arm was maintaining a gap between the block and the slab, and Daniel had no confidence that whatever it was would hold.  He used his free hand to gather chunks of stone and mortar and shove them into the space as far as they would go.  Given the size of the slab it was unlikely that these small, already broken pieces would hold the weight, but it made him feel better to do something.

 

He had no idea how long he had been there; his glow-in-the-dark watch was on the inaccessible arm.  His radio was nowhere to be found, but he did have a canteen attached to his belt – half full at the time of the incident.  Daniel relaxed as much as he could, concentrating on his breathing exercises, trying not to fight the pain but let it flow through him without resistance.  Unfortunately, it appeared that he sucked at mind over matter.

 

His thoughts kept going back to Jack and how they had last spoken to each other.  It broke his heart that those might be their last words.  He wanted to see Jack again just long enough to apologize.  He had said awful things to the man that he wished to heaven he could take back; it had been so unfair to blame Jack for the deaths of his wife and friends. 

 

As he thought about why he had done it he realized that it stemmed from his fear of losing Jack himself.  Jack seemed to be pulling away from Daniel, and he had projected his anguish about that onto the other bereavements he had so recently sustained.  Despite his history with each of those people, he had survived losing them.  He honestly didn’t know if he could survive losing Jack.  Was it the straw that broke the camel’s back, or was it that Jack had become a primary support in the structure of his life?  Fitting, then, that he should die in a collapsed building. 

 

 

~~*~~

 

Major Taylor was waiting when Jack, the rest of SG-1, and SG-4 came through the ‘Gate trailed by two F.R.E.D.’s  loaded with equipment.  It was a ten-minute walk to the site and they wasted no time getting started.

 

Jack snapped, “Report, Major.”

 

The SG-9 team leader was at least five inches shorter than O’Neill, and had to practically run to keep up.  “Sir, at approximately 1130 hours the entire temple complex collapsed.  All the scientists in the research team have been secured except for one.”  He glanced apprehensively at Jack.  “From our preliminary survey of the site there’s no indication of where Dr. Jackson might be within the ruins.  There’s no response on the radio and there’s been no other sound or sign.”

 

Jack looked him in the eye, not knowing or caring that the very blankness of his face was even more intimidating than fury would have been.  “And where exactly were you while Daniel was rescuing civilian personnel from a collapsing building?”

 

“Sir, my team and I were running a security sweep of the perimeter.  It was supposed to be safe inside the temple, but there are wild animals in the vicinity so we were making sure none approached the work-site or the encampment.  We started back immediately when we heard Dr. Jackson’s call on the radio, but by the time we arrived it was all over.  There had been no sign of instability in the building or any tremors or anything.  We couldn’t have known!”

 

“I don’t want to hear your excuses, Major.  The safety of those people was your responsibility, including Dr. Jackson.  I will hold you responsible if he isn’t recovered.”

 

The soldier blanched.  “Yes, sir.”

 

Jack stopped suddenly as the temple came into view.  He had seen images from the original planet survey, but this pile of rubble in no way resembled the two acre configuration of courtyards and domed roofs it had once been.  In the photos sunlight reflecting off a thick frost coating made the elegant complex appear to be covered in diamonds.  Now it looked like a bomb had gone off, or a ten on the Richter Scale earthquake. 

 

He asked, “How far into the wreckage have you reconnoitered?”

 

“We haven’t.  We’ve been around the outside, but we didn’t want to go climbing around in there and risk causing further cave-ins.”

 

“Good.”  He turned to his teammates who were unstrapping equipment from the mobile carrier.  “Carter, get to it.”

 

“Right away, sir.”  She adjusted her scanner and motioned for Teal’c to take his in the opposite direction around the ruin.

 

Seven scientists approached Jack as a group.  One of them whom Jack didn’t know asked, “What can we do, Colonel?”

 

“I’m going to have one of Major Taylor’s men escort you back to the ‘Gate.  You’ll be returning to Earth immediately.”

 

The man insisted, “But we want to help!  Dr. Jackson saved our lives, and we don’t want to leave until we know he’s safe.”  They all looked at him in earnest agreement.

 

Jack’s heart thawed enough to feel compassion for them.  He knew how hard it was to wait and do nothing when someone he cared about, when Daniel, was in trouble.  His voice softened as he explained, “I know you’re worried, but right now this is a rescue mission and the military personnel need to have the space to do what they were trained to do.  You can help the most by making yourselves one less thing to worry about.  We’ll report to the SGC as soon as we know anything.”

 

They reluctantly agreed and began to move away, but Dr. Fisk, a sandy-haired forty-something with thick glasses, approached him.  “I can be useful, Colonel.  I’m an archaeologist and am experienced in excavation, not just theoretical study.”  He motioned to the newly arrived equipment.  “I know how to handle that mini-crane you brought.  Let me help.”

 

Jack had learned not to underestimate geeky archaeologists.  “All right, just follow orders exactly as they’re given.”

 

Fisk nodded seriously.  “Yes, sir.”

 

Then Jack was left alone as the others moved around the edges of the wreckage.  It was inconceivable that Daniel could be alive under all that.  True, Daniel had been considered or had actually been dead before and had come through it, but this time could be the last.  He didn’t know how to even try to come to terms with that.  He swore that if his friend pulled off another miracle nothing would stop him from putting things right, even if it meant groveling.    He prayed silently for the opportunity to grovel. 

 

Just then Carter shouted and waved her arms.  “Here, Colonel!”

 

He took off running and soon joined her on top of a pile of debris.  She excitedly showed him the monitor.  There was a red and yellow blob in the center of the black screen.  Carter explained, “That must be Daniel!  It’s the only heat signature we’ve picked up.”

 

“Carter, can you tell if he’s alive from this?”

 

“Yes.  I’m sure he’s alive.”  Her occasional slight stutter tripped her words.  “W, i, if he were dead then there would be signs of cooling, but this is normal adult human body heat.”

 

Only Jack’s training allowed him to stay upright as the blood rushed away from his head.  “Good news, Carter.”

 

Her face fell.  “We can’t tell from this what condition he’s in.  He could be injured or dying right now.”

 

“Try to be an optimist for once.  This is Daniel ‘back from the dead’ Jackson we’re talking about.”

 

He called the rest of the rescue team and they began surveying the specific site where they believed Daniel to be, a process in which Dr. Fisk proved an asset.  The painstaking task of carefully removing chunks of rubble without causing further damage was entirely too slow to suit Jack, but he had hope, and at that precise moment it was what he needed.

 

 

~~*~~

 

Daniel was still groggy after he woke up.  He much preferred the term ‘napping’ to ‘slipping in and out of consciousness’.  He was finding it more and more difficult to breathe- it was like the stone was closing in on him and crushing the life out of him.  

 

He thought he heard something.  Voices?  An engine?  It was probably either wishful thinking or delirium.  His chest felt tight from the strain of his weight on the injured arm, and the effort to breath seemed more immediate than wisps of imagined sound.  He didn’t want to listen in case they were calling him from the other side.  He didn’t want to die.

 

There was something he couldn’t avoid hearing; the sound began again.  Dust billowed and then the slab began to move.  Slowly, incrementally, the heavy stone shifted position.  Daniel could feel its weight grinding into his wrist, broken bones stabbing into his flesh.  The explosion of pain took his breath away.  When he was able to draw air back into his lungs it was expelled in an agonized scream.  Then he passed out.

 

 

~~*~~

 

On the surface everyone stood still as an ominous rumble sounded below them.  Jack saw a few pieces of rubble shift slightly, but blessedly no major dislocations.  As the vibrations began to abate, in the silence they heard a heart wrenching noise – a scream of deepest anguish that could only have come from Daniel.  The sound, which initially meant that Daniel was alive, cut off abruptly, stopping Jack’s heart at the same time.  After a moment he looked at the others standing around him, who were no less shocked, and barked, “Back to work.  Let’s move it people, and carefully.”

 

They silently returned to the job of lifting the next chunk of rock.  As the lump swung away at the end of the mini-crane, Teal’c leaned into the depression and began hauling up and throwing to the side small and not so small pieces of stone.  Everyone stepped back out of his way.

 

Jack turned to Carter, “Well?  How much farther.” 

 

The slightly pale woman answered, “I think we’re almost there, sir.  Just a few more of the big pieces and we should reach him.”

 

He whined, “Can’t we speed this thing up?”

 

As Sam frowned and began to reply seriously he cut her off.  “Never mind.  I know it takes as long as it takes.  Teal’c?  You ready to go after the next one?”

 

“Indeed.  Please pass me the ropes.”

 

It was an interminable hour later when the removal of a slab of script-covered wall revealed a dark hole underneath. 

 

Carter exclaimed, “I think that’s it, sir!”

 

Jack knelt next to the opening and called, “Daniel!  Daniel, can you hear me?”

 

There was no response, so he carefully lay down, distributing his weight as widely as possible, and lowered his head into the hole.  At first it was too dark to see much, and the dust didn’t help, but after a moment he was able to make out the form of his lost friend slumped awkwardly on the far side of the buried cavity.  “Daniel!”  At his call there was a slight stirring and a moan, but no direct response.

 

Jack pulled himself up.  “It looks like Daniel’s hurt.  There’s enough room, so I’m going in to check him out.  Don’t do anything else ‘til I give you the word.”

 

The others nodded gravely and Jack began lowering himself into the darkness, causing minor rockslides as he disturbed the wreckage.  The space, the existence of which had undoubtedly saved Daniel’s life, was about four feet high, five feet wide and eight feet deep from where Jack crouched.  The ‘roof’ was mostly a fallen wall held up by a long beam crossing the cavity as well as several strategically balanced stones extruding from the rubble walls.

 

Through the swirling dust Jack could make out Daniel’s form at the far end of the chamber.  He was still sitting up, but his head was hanging forward, chin to chest.  “Hey there, Daniel.  I’m comin’ for you.”

 

Without receiving a response Jack began to crawl toward his friend, being careful not to touch the walls or ceiling while ignoring the pain of sharp rocks digging into his knees and palms.  Daniel looked like a ghost, covered in white powder.  As he got close Jack was relieved to see the puff of Daniel’s breath in the cold air.

 

Jack noted a trickle of blood down the side of Daniel’s face, not too much, thankfully, and a bruise that darkened his cheek under the dust.  He quickly patted down Daniel’s limbs and torso looking for broken bones and was relieved to find none.  None on the limbs that he could see.  The arm trapped between a rock and a hard place, the reason Daniel was still sitting up while unconscious, was a whole other story.  Jack couldn’t see what damage had been done, but it couldn’t be good.  And hanging there by his arm must have been putting a lot of strain on Daniel’s shoulder and chest.

 

Jack eased himself in front of Daniel, his knees on either side of Daniel’s thighs, and wrapped his arms around his teammate’s torso, taking some of the weight onto his own chest. Despite the circumstances Jack thought that he had never felt anything as wonderful as the solid body in his arms.  He lost himself in the sensation for a moment until he noticed that Daniel’s head was beginning to move a bit on its own. 

 

“Daniel?  Can you hear me?  How ya doin’ there, big fella?”

 

Daniel snorted a bit, tilted his head back, and blinked at Jack, blue eyes washed to gray in the pale light.

 

“Jack?”

 

“The same.  You’re going to be okay, Danny.  We’re going to get you out of here.”

 

Still dazed, Daniel seemed confused.  “You came?”

 

“Of course I did.”

 

Suddenly Daniel’s eyes widened and his eyebrows lifted as though remembering something important.  He blurted, “I’m sorry!”

 

Jack didn’t know what Daniel was talking about, but it didn’t matter.  “You’ve got nothing to apologize for.  Just take it easy.”

 

Daniel shook his head.  “No.  Wanted to live long enough.  Wanted to tell you.  I’m sorry.  Didn’t mean it, Jack.  Don’t want to lose you.”  Daniel’s free arm snaked around Jack’s back and clutched his jacket.  His head dropped tiredly onto Jack’s shoulder.  “Don’t want to lose you.”

 

Jack’s heart broke into a million pieces at the words and the sadness behind them.  He tightened his hold on Daniel and nuzzled the dirty hair with his cheek.  “Ain’t gonna happen.  You’re not ever gonna lose me, buddy.  Not ever.  You can count on that.”

 

Daniel sighed and Jack thought that he might be on the verge of passing out again.

 

Just then the light dimmed and Carter’s head and shoulders appeared through the hole.  She called, “Sir?”

 

“Daniel’s arm is caught.  We’re going to need some support beams in here to brace the ceiling, then it looks like you’re going to have to remove everything over us to free him.  And bring water and blankets.  Better yet, a space heater.”

 

At that Daniel’s head popped up in alarm.  “No!  That’s what happened.  Our space heaters melted the frost that was holding the structure together, I think.  Never unfroze for hundreds of years till we came.  Stupid.”

 

“That’s a new one.”  Jack looked around meaningfully.  “I think the damage has been done, Daniel.”

 

The younger man shook his head then dropped it back onto Jack’s shoulder,  the cold nose-tip brushing his neck.  “Don’t risk it.”

 

“Okay.”  He turned to Carter.  “Bring lots of blankets.  We’re going to be here for a while.”

 

Instead of jumping to carry out his orders, the woman asked, “How is he?”

 

“Shaky but coherent.  Can’t tell how bad he’s hurt yet.”  His 2IC didn’t seem satisfied with the answer, but he waved her away.  “Go.”

 

She frowned.  “Yes, sir.  I’ll be right back.”

 

Left alone again, Jack rubbed Daniel’s back lightly.  “So do you wanna tell me?  How bad is it?”

 

Daniel mumbled.  “Bad.  Hurts a lot.”  Jack grew even more worried hearing Daniel admit to pain.  “Wrist.  Crushed, I think.  It hurts so much, Jack.”

 

Jack kissed his temple.  “I know.  You hold on and soon we’ll have you out of here and back to the nice, warm infirmary.  Fraiser can earn her salary.”

 

Daniel snorted softly.  “Needs a raise.”

 

“Yeah.  Maybe I’ll suggest she get hazardous duty pay for having to deal with SG1.”

 

The younger man was quiet for a moment then said, his voice becoming progressively quieter, “I’m sorry.”

 

“I thought we covered that.”

 

“Sorry that you had to rescue me again.  Screw up.”

 

Jack knew that Daniel was thinking about what Jack had said to him and guilt washed through him.  “You’re not a screw up, Daniel.  Far from it.  You saved your team and got caught in the process.  There’s no shame in that.  You’re a hero, Daniel.”

 

There was a small puff of air that didn’t quite reach chuckle status and Daniel whispered, still managing to fill the words with derision, “Hero.  Right.”

 

“Yes, it is right.  You’re the bravest man I know.  The bravest man I’ve ever known.  And the smartest and the kindest.  I’m sorry I ever let you think otherwise.  I was a schmuck.  You should believe in yourself as much as I believe in you.”

 

There was no response.  Daniel was either asleep or passed out again.  It hurt that so near death Daniel blamed and belittled himself.  Jack knew that he bore a lot of responsibility for that.

 

“Don’t worry.  I’ll tell you again later and I’ll make sure you hear me.  I promise you’ll never doubt either of us again.  I promise.”

 

 

~~*~~

 

Daniel faded in and out of consciousness, but every time he was awake he was aware of the warmth of Jack’s body against his and the strength of the arms around him.  He heard voices and noises, but didn’t feel the need to follow what was going on.  Jack was there, and that was all he needed to know.

 

He felt Sam’s hands on him, checking his pulse and temperature, and he tried to smile for her though it probably wasn’t very convincing.  She washed his face, which was a relief, and gave him Advil and a hot drink.  At some point shiny thermal blankets were wrapped around both Jack and himself, making a tent that was quickly warmed by their body heat. 

 

He had gotten so that he could ignore the pain most of the time.  It helped to hear a steady stream of comforting words in Jack’s rich voice.  There were, you’re-doing-greats, and, hang-in-there-Dannys, and other things he didn’t bother to listen to very closely.  What was important was that Jack had come for him, was holding him, and didn’t seem inclined to let go any time soon.  It felt like something important was changing, like every moment they spent clinging to each other was a moment spent healing.  Something for the very top of the ‘positive thoughts’ list.  Almost made the whole thing worthwhile.

 

 

~~*~~

 

Digging Daniel out seemed to be taking forever and Jack’s knees, thighs and back were not happy with him.  Compared to what Daniel was going through, his discomfort was minor, and it wasn’t entirely unpleasant to cuddle under blankets with Daniel. 

 

Jack laughed to himself.  It wasn’t the first time he’d thought something like that about the scientist, but it was probably the most inappropriate.  That said, Daniel didn’t seem to mind the contact either, and he wasn’t a particularly cuddly individual.  Wouldn’t it be a kick if Daniel felt the same way he did?  It would explain a lot if it were true.  It was amazing how two normally intelligent guys could act like such complete duffusses (or was that duffii?) around matters of the heart.  Maybe when this was over they would have to bite the bullet and actually talk to each other.  After nearly driving Daniel away to die crushed under a temple, there wasn’t much to lose in trying.

 

Major Taylor was the smallest member of the rescue party so he spent the most time underground.  He was there again positioning a blanket over Jack and Daniel’s heads.  They were ready to move the main ceiling piece, and Jack thought that getting dust in their hair was the least of their worries, but he guessed the blanket couldn’t hurt.  When they were covered Jack felt an arm rest across his back and not move.

 

“Major.”

 

Through the material he heard a muffled, “Colonel?”

 

“Major.”

 

The SG9 leader lifted the edge of the blanket and peeked in.

 

“Major, get out of here.”

 

Taylor looked back and forth between Jack and Daniel, which wasn’t very far.  He said, “I can help shield Dr. Jackson.”

 

“If anything goes wrong there’s no point in you being in here too.  Dr. Jackson is my teammate and there’s no way I’m leaving him alone, but you are under my command and I’m ordering you to move outside while we do this.  Judicious use of Uncle Sam’s highly trained personnel.  Now go.”

 

“But sir…”

 

“Ah!  Me Colonel, you Major, remember?  Order.”

 

The man had to be 35 if he was a day, yet he pouted just like a 3 year old.  “Yes, sir.”

 

Under the blanket Jack smiled as he listened to him clamber to the surface.  There was hope for Major Taylor yet.

 

 Soon there was an ominous creaking and scraping sound and Daniel’s head came up.  After a moment light began to leak in between the blankets as the wall was lifted away.  It had grown dark and the area was lit by floodlights that were brighter than the sun.  The concern was that they were warmer than the sunlight, too.

 

It sounded like it was going well.  There was increasingly more light and a fresh influx of cold air.  Just as Jack heard brief cheers of success from outside, Daniel’s body stiffened in his arms and arched backwards, a choked shout of pain muffled by the blanket.

 

Jack tightened his hold, trying to keep Daniel from moving too much and making it worse.  He hadn’t noticed the blocks trapping Daniel’s arm shift, but then he wasn’t as intimately connected with them. 

 

“Hold on!  Hold on, Daniel, I’ve got you.  Ride it out.”

 

After several interminable seconds Daniel began to crumple forward again, letting Jack take his weight.  His body shuddered continuously and Daniel breathed a long, “Aaaaahhh,” composed of a series of gasps. 

 

Jack rubbed Daniel’s cheek with his own.  “Jesus, Daniel.  It’s almost over, I swear.”

 

The blanket over the top of them was lifted off and a blonde head leaned in.  Jack wasted no words.  “Carter, bring the morphine.”

 

Her eyes on Daniel’s pale face, she looked conflicted.  “Sir, you know it isn’t a good idea until we can examine him more thoroughly.”

 

Jack answered quietly but firmly.  “He’s in a lot of pain and it’s going to get worse.  Just bring it.”

 

“Yes, sir.”

 

Daniel didn’t seem to be aware that he had received an injection, but the trembling began to subside soon thereafter.  Only then did Jack himself start to relax.  It seemed a novel experience to have the open sky above him again.  It was so clear that Jack could see the stars despite the floodlights.  Under other circumstances it would have been beautiful – the diamonds were now suspended in the sky.

 

Teal’c’s round face entered his field of vision. 

 

“O’Neill.  We are ready to remove the final stone.  Do you or Daniel Jackson require anything at this time?”

 

“Just get it done so we can get our boy home.”

 

Teal’c nodded.  “As you say.  Prepare yourselves.”

 

Jack wasn’t sure if Daniel was conscious or not, but he explained what was going to happen just in case.  Renewing his grip on the injured man he nodded for them to proceed.

 

The slab lifted straight up and Daniel’s head followed suit.  After a glimpse at what was revealed Jack captured Daniel’s head in one hand and turned it away, pulling it down on the opposite shoulder.  Feeling that had to be bad enough even with morphine, he didn’t want Daniel to have to see it as well.  Daniel seemed to be fully unconscious now, which was probably a blessing.

 

Jack could hardly recognize what was on the end of Daniel’s arm.  The hand looked almost normal except for being swollen three times its usual size and bright purple in color.  But the wrist…  Jack swallowed hard.  It was well beyond broken and it scared Jack.  It was the wrong shape and the round watch-face was imbedded deeply into the flesh.  He turned his own face away and rested it against the back of Daniel’s head.

 

During his time in the military Jack had seen human bodies mangled and ruined in every way imaginable, had seen much worse, but this was Daniel’s body and he would never get used to seeing it damaged.

 

Her voice tight, Carter explained, “We’re going to slide a board under his arm and hand and secure it.  Then we will be able to move him.”

 

Jack just nodded, trying to tame a rebellious stomach.

 

Carter continued to talk as she worked.  “It’s almost a miracle the skin wasn’t broken.  If it had been he could have bled to death before we could free him.  So it might have been worse.”

 

Jack just nodded.

 

“Okay, I think we’re ready.”

 

Then there were several people around them, prying Daniel out of his arms, lifting him out of the hole and onto a stretcher.  Major Taylor took Jack by the elbows and helped him slowly to his feet, actually holding him up for a minute while feeling returned to his legs.  Jack took a breath and looked around.

 

“Where’s Daniel?”

 

“They’re on the way to the ‘Gate, sir.”

 

“Well, what do ya say we blow this pop stand?”

 

“Sounds like a plan, sir.”

 

The younger man jumped out of the hole and offered Jack a hand.  Jack flexed his knees slightly, shrugged, and let Taylor do most of the work.  The brisk trot helped and Jack felt back to normal by the time they caught up with the others just before the ‘Gate.   On the other side he stood back and let the medical personnel swarm around his friend, feeling bereft at the emptiness of his arms, but glad it was over.   If only it were really over.

 

 

~~*~~

 

“Daniel?  Daniel, open your eyes.”

 

The voice was soft and feminine, but insistent.

 

“Daniel, it’s time to wake up now.  Open your eyes.”

 

After trying valiantly for a moment, Daniel managed to comply with the request.  The face smiling down at him was pretty in a no-nonsense way.  A comforting sight.

 

“Janet.”

 

The smile broadened.  “Welcome back, Daniel.  How do you feel?”

 

“Nothing,” he croaked.  “Don’t feel anything.”

 

Bringing a cup of water and straw to his mouth, the doctor answered, “That would be the drugs.  I’m afraid you’ll be feeling it later.”

 

As his mind became clearer and his parched throat eased, Daniel took stock.  Infirmary, obviously.  His left hand was elevated on a pillow by his side, encased in a cast from the first knuckle of his fingers almost to the elbow.  The tips of the digits sticking out the end were swollen and discolored.

 

“What happened?”

 

“How much do you remember?”

 

“There was a cave-in.  Temple collapsed.  My arm was… caught.  Jack came.  They were digging me out.  That’s about it.”

 

“Very good.  Obviously they brought you back.  You want the medical ‘what happened’, right?”

 

Daniel nodded.

 

“You received a minor concussion, multiple scrapes and bruises,” her fingers brushed his cheekbone and he could feel the heat of what must have been a substantial black eye.  She continued softly but professionally, “Most of the damage was to your wrist.  There were multiple fractures, thankfully none of them compound.  You’ve already undergone two surgeries and another will have to be performed when the swelling goes down.  We’ve had a first-rate orthopedic surgeon attending you, and he is hopeful that you will regain significant use of your hand.”

 

Daniel frowned.  “Two?  Surgeries?  How long?”

 

“You’ve been back about four days, under sedation most of the time.”

 

“Four days?”  His body briefly and unsuccessfully tried to sit up, which resulted in a deep ache shooting through his arm.  “How are the others?  Is everyone all right?”

 

A deep voice answered from behind Dr. Fraiser’s back, “Thanks to you they are.”  The heart monitor betrayed the accelerated rhythm that voice provoked.

 

Janet looked over her shoulder.  “Colonel.  I had a feeling your Daniel-radar would have you back before long.”

 

The tall, handsome man stepped up beside her.  He looked tired.  “You lied to a superior officer, Major.  Sent me away under false pretenses.”

 

“I wanted to wake Daniel up without an audience.”  She didn’t sound the least bit repentant.  “I don’t have to allow you in here at all.”

 

Daniel protested, “But…”

 

She smiled down at him, “But I will.  You’re going to be in my care for some time, Dr. Jackson.  You’ll be sleeping a lot at first, then we’ll balance your medication so that you can be awake for longer periods without too much pain.”  She looked at Jack pointedly.  “Lots of rest, no excitement.  Understood?”

 

Jack held up his hands in a defensive gesture.  “What?  Like I’m going to be bringing in a Mariachi band?”

 

“See that you don’t.  Sir. 

 

“Daniel, Dr. Sorensen will be in tomorrow to talk to you in more detail about your arm and what you can expect, all right?”

 

He nodded. 

 

“Five minutes,” she admonished both men.

 

When the doctor had gone, Jack pulled up a chair and sat so that his head was on the same level as Daniel’s.  The gray-haired man raised his eyebrows.  “What are you grinning at?”

 

Daniel tried to straighten out the muscles of his face.  “I’m just glad to see you.”

 

Jack closed his eyes for a moment then said softly, “I am too.  Glad to see you.”  He stroked Daniel’s arm above the cast. 

 

It was probably the meds, but Daniel felt unreasonably good.  “I remember that you were there, when they were digging me out.”

 

“Do you remember what we talked about?”

 

“Mostly, I think.”

 

“I promised you that we would be all right, Daniel, and I meant it.”

 

“I said I was sorry for what happened before, and I meant that.  I don’t want you to think…”

 

“I don’t.  None of that matters now.  Just get well.”

 

“Okay.”

 

Daniel’s eyes were growing heavy, but he kept them focused on Jack until they closed, falling back to sleep with the smile still on his face.

 

 

~~*~~

 

Jack sang along with the radio as he drove up the steep road to Cheyenne Mountain.  Despite Daniel’s injury, life didn’t suck as much as it had. 

 

He hadn’t spent a lot of time alone with his friend in the last five days.  It seemed like Carter and Teal’c were always hovering around.  Well, Teal’c hovered, Jack shuddered at the thought, telling Jaffa jokes.  Carter flitted in and out like a humming bird.  And then there were the scientists from the ill-fated mission who wanted to be sure Daniel knew they thought he was the cat’s pajamas.  Jack had found Dr. Fisk trying to engage Daniel in a game of chess, but the injured man kept falling asleep between moves.  Jack had ended up playing with the other archaeologist while Daniel kibitzed between naps.  Major Taylor and his men brought magazines and chocolate bars.

 

When they were together, Jack and Daniel were at ease with each other for the first time in a long while.  Something had shifted as they held each other through those hours in the dark.  The basic truth that they were important to each other had been exposed in a way neither could nor wanted to deny.  Nothing was said, but there was an understanding between them that didn’t require words.  Just like the old days.

 

Checking into the mountain, Jack was delayed by a stream of people checking out.  He asked the security guard, “What’s going on?”

 

“Non-essential personnel are being sent home, sir.  Dr. Fraiser asked that you go directly to the infirmary when you arrived.”

 

Jack didn’t like the sound of that, and mentally hurried the elevator along.  When he walked into the infirmary he found Daniel sitting on the edge of the bed with Nurse Sharon buttoning one of his checked shirts over a T-shirt and jeans.  Both Teal’c and Carter were hovering.

 

He saw Janet speed-walking toward him and called a cheery, “What’s up, Doc?”

 

She didn’t even take the time to scowl, but shoved a paper bag into his hands. 

 

“These are Daniel’s medications and detailed instructions on which need to be taken when.  Do not deviate from the schedule and don’t let Daniel talk you out of taking the pain pills.  They are as important to his recovery as anything else.”

 

Jack opened his mouth to ask the obvious question, but never got to it. 

 

“SG7 called ahead to warn us that they have contracted a highly contagious virus-like illness and would require quarantine procedures.  As a precaution the General has ordered the base to prepare for lockdown.  I don’t want Daniel exposed to anything, so you’re taking him home.  He’ll need bed rest, meds and proper nutrition.  You’ll need to check his fingers regularly to make sure circulation is unimpaired, and if there’s any problem you can take him to the Academy Hospital.  I know I can count on you, sir.  Any questions?”

 

“Um.  No?”

 

“Good.” 

 

She looked past his shoulder then walked around him, calling, “Apodaca, how many extra air filters do we have for that…”  and was gone.

 

Jack turned to his team, which was bunched together protectively.  Daniel shrugged, “For once I didn’t have to beg to be let out.”

 

“We’ll send SG7 flowers.  What about you two?  You coming home with me too?”

 

Carter shook her head and looked at Daniel a bit guiltily.  “No, sir.  That is, if you and Daniel will be all right on your own I would rather stay here where I can get some work done.  Being locked out of my lab isn’t my idea of a vacation.”

 

“You’re a strange woman, Carter.”  Then Jack assured her, “We’ll be fine. 

 

“What about you, Teal’c?”

 

“I shall remain as well.  There have been occasions in the past where my immunity to disease has been beneficial.  My services may be required.”

 

General Hammond joined the group.  “I have good people, don’t I, Jack?”

 

Now Jack felt a bit guilty.  “General, are you sure you don’t need me to stay and help?”

 

Sounding perfectly serious he replied, “I suppose that somehow we’ll muddle through without you, Colonel.”  Turning to Daniel, his face softened into a fond smile.  “Besides, you have a very important assignment yourself, taking care of Dr. Jackson.”

 

Daniel blushed and ducked his head, and everyone who was watching melted. 

 

As Dr. Fraiser returned the General informed her, “We have about 15 minutes, Doctor.”

 

She helped Daniel down from the bed and handed him off to Jack.  “We’ve given Daniel an extra dose of painkillers to help with the transition, so he may be out of it for a while.  Take that wheelchair.  I’ll call you later.  General, let me show you what we’ve prepared.”

 

Obviously dismissed, Jack loaded Daniel into the chair and maneuvered out to the hall.  Daniel smiled happily as Carter gave him a kiss and a hug, and Teal’c wisely encouraged him to follow Jack’s orders.  They were in the elevator before it occurred to Daniel to insist on going to his office for books.  Jack just patted his shoulder patiently and headed for the parking lot.

 

Driving down the road he had come up barely half an hour earlier, Jack snapped off the radio.  “So I guess it’s just you and me, pardner.”

 

Daniel twisted under the seatbelt, laid his cheek against the head-rest and grinned at Jack.  He didn’t say anything, he just beamed a megawatt smile that pretty much took Jack’s breath away.

 

“Okay.  Just how loopy are you, Daniel?” he drawled.

 

To Jack’s somewhat alarmed surprise, Daniel sang to him, “Loopy loopy loopy loop-e-e-eee.  Loopy loopy loopy loop-a-a-aaah.”

 

“Um, I think that’s Louie.”

 

Big mistake.  Daniel obliged by repeating the phrases with the correct wording.

 

Jack rolled his eyes. 

 

Daniel asked brightly, “Jack, have I told you how much I like you?  You’re a really great guy.  The best.  You’re the very, very best friend I’ve ever had.  Ever.”

 

“I’m glad, Daniel.  You’re my best friend too.”

 

“You’re the best,” he insisted.  Then, unfortunately, he began to sing again.  “You’re the top.  You’re the Tower of Pisa.  You’re the top.  You’re the Mona Lisa.”

 

“That’s great, Daniel.  Thanks a bunch.  I get the picture now.”

 

Daniel ignored him.  “You’re the top.  La da da da da daaa.  You’re the top.  You’re pepperoni pizza.”

 

It was a long ride back to Jack’s house.

 

Moving from the truck to the house distracted Daniel from butchering the hit-parade of the previous century.  Jack took him directly to the guest bedroom and balanced him on the edge of the bed, hoping he wouldn’t fall over during the time it took to grab a pair of pajamas out of the dresser. 

 

Given direct and specific orders, Daniel was able to help a bit with getting himself undressed.  Jack got his first look at the long, diagonal bruise discoloring Daniel’s back and grimacing, he flashed to that cold, dark cavity with the falling rock and dust.  Pulling up the dark blue flannel jammy bottoms, Jack’s nose became abruptly acquainted with Daniel’s hip bone, but only after he had admired it and the smooth skin surrounding it.  Getting the shirt over the cast proved impossible, and Jack resorted to scissors.

 

As he slid Daniel under the sheet, the younger man’s mood changed abruptly.  He sat up, grabbed Jack’s arm, and held on for dear life.

 

“Jack, don’t go.  Don’t leave me alone.”

 

He sat on the edge of the bed.  “I won’t.  I’m right here.”

 

Daniel looked at him with desolate eyes.  “Please, Jack.  I need you.  Don’t go.”

 

Jack reached out and pulled Daniel to him, holding him close much as he had on the planet.  Daniel felt warm and solid in his arms.

 

“Don’t worry about anything.  I need you, too, more than you can know.  I won’t ever leave you again, I promise.  Go to sleep.”

 

Daniel clung to him with his one good arm and murmured into his shoulder, “I love you.”

 

Jack rocked him gently and whispered, “Me too, god help me.  Me too.”

 

 

~~*~~

 

Daniel could never quite get used to waking up in strange places, no matter how often it happened.  At least this time he recognized where he was, though he hadn’t been here in quite a while.  It was Jack’s spare bedroom.  He’d definitely woken up in much worse places than this.  There were even some of his books on the shelf.  He spotted Secrets from the Sand.  So that’s where he left it! 

 

He managed to sit up, but the deep, throbbing pain in his arm made Daniel groan before he could bite his lip.  Within seconds Jack appeared in the doorway with a glass in his hand.

 

“Oh good, you’re up.  I was just going to wake you to get these pills into you before we got too far off your meds schedule.”  He moved to sit on the edge of the bed, revealing three tablets in his palm.  Daniel sighed, but popped the pills into his mouth and accepted the glass of apple juice to wash them down.

 

“Well, I guess I’m not in the infirmary any more.”

 

Jack cocked his head.  “Neeewww.  It’s home sweet home.  Are you comfy?”

 

“Um, yeah.  Thanks for taking me in.”

 

“Like I had a choice.  That miniature bulldog of a CMO decided this was the place for you and that was the final word.”

 

“Oh, I think I remember that.  There was a problem with one of the off world teams, right?”

 

Jack had a funny look on his face.  “Is that the last thing you remember?”

 

“Pretty much.  Those pain pills make me loopy.”

 

Jack snorted.  “I’ve heard that one before.  Sometimes it’s just as well to forget.”

 

Uh oh.  Daniel had a bad feeling about this.  He asked suspiciously, “Why?  Did I do something embarrassing?”

 

“Oh, not unless you count a falsetto version of that ‘wind beneath my wings’ song.”

 

Daniel grinned.  “You had me worried there for a minute, but I know you’re making that up.  I don’t sing.”

 

“No, you don’t.  And I’m not making it up.”

 

“Are too.”

 

“Am not.”

 

“Are too.”

 

“Damn, I wish I’d had a tape recorder.  Would’a been great blackmail material.  That and, ‘You fill up my senses.’”

 

“I really sang?  I butchered John Denver?  All I can say is that I’m sorry.”

 

“Apology accepted.  Who can you torture vocally if not your friends?”

 

“Did I, er, do anything else embarrassing?  Do I even want to know?”

 

Jack’s face softened and his eyes got sort of misty.  He reached out and grasped the back of Daniel’s neck.  “Nothing to worry about.  You were your usual amazing self.”

 

Daniel didn’t know what to make of that but it didn’t sound bad, and the touch felt nice.  It occurred to him to ask, “Have you heard anything from the mountain?  Is everyone all right?”

 

Jack let his hand drop.  “I guess SG7 caught a pretty bad bug, but they’re responding to treatment and so far nobody else is showing symptoms.  They’re maintaining lockdown for the time being, but it looks good.  Just another day like any other.”

 

Daniel grinned.  “For once it isn’t us.”

 

“And it won’t be for a while.  With that bum arm of yours SG1’ll be on stand down for a couple of months.  My chance to get caught up on paperwork.  Oh, the joy.”

 

Cringing inwardly, Daniel said, “Yeah, about that.  Me and SG1.  We don’t know yet how well my arm will heal up, and anyway, I though I was….”  He couldn’t say it.

 

Jack sat up straight.  “Off?  Do you still want to be?”

 

“No.  I never did.  I thought you did.”

 

“No.  I sort of lost it there for a while, went a little crazy.  I thought you didn’t want…”  He waggled his hand vaguely toward himself.

 

“But I do!  I thought you didn’t.”

 

“Oh, I do.  Believe me, I do a lot.”

 

“So if my arm is okay we’ll be..?”

 

“Your arm will be okay, and so will we.”

 

“I hope so.”

 

Jack looked unusually serious.  He rested a hand lightly on Daniel’s thigh.  “You’ve been kind of out of it, so I’ll remind you of what’s already been settled.  We’re here for each other, Daniel.  We aren’t doubting that anymore.  Agreed?”

 

Daniel felt a weight lifting.  He had kind of thought that, but hadn’t wanted to assume too much.  “I agree.  I’d like that.”  He hesitated.  “But I’m not sure it’s that simple.  We haven’t been working well together.  Will that change?”

 

Jack made a face of consternation.  “Will you still want to get away from us?  From me?”

 

“It isn’t so much that I wanted to get away from you, as that it was too painful to be with you.  You wouldn’t listen to me.  I felt like you didn’t respect me.”

 

“I listen to you and I respect you.  I just don’t always do what you say.”

 

“But it’s my job to do certain things, to know certain things.  If you ignore what I say then what use am I?”

 

Jack’s hand tightened on his thigh.  “You gotta understand, Daniel, I have my own job to do.  My job is to make the final decisions.  The buck stops right here.  You advise me, Carter advises me, and so does Teal’c, but ultimately it’s me who has to decide.  Only me.  It’s my job to get the team home safely and it’s my job to see that our assignment is carried out to the best of our ability.  I make the best call I can.”

 

“But that doesn’t really make sense when it’s my area, when I’m right.”

 

“Daniel, I can’t just turn a situation or mission over to you and drop my responsibility.  It doesn’t work that way.  When I say, ‘Go do your thing, Daniel,’ or, ‘Back off, Daniel,’ that’s me deploying you strategically.  It’s still my call and it has to be that way.  If I don’t do what you want, it doesn’t mean I don’t trust you.  It’s just me making a decision given what information I have, which, I should point out, is sometimes more information than you have.  I can get it wrong, and believe me, no one is more aware of it than I am when it happens.  But I have to listen to my own judgment if I’m going to get you kids home alive.  Nothing is more important than that, not even hurt feelings.  Most of the time I think you understand that.”

 

Daniel did usually understand that, but maybe sometimes he forgot.  It was good to have a reminder of just how heavily the burden of command sat on Jack’s shoulders.  He nodded.  “You’re right.  It’s hard when I believe in something and it conflicts with your judgment.”

 

“Yeah.  It has to be difficult for a man like you to adjust to this kind of environment and I’m sorry if I make it harder.  You have to know that I never disregard you or shut you out on purpose.  I’m just a dumb military grunt doing the best I can.”

 

Daniel snorted.  “Dumb.  Right.”  Then he asked, “A man like me?  Am I so different?”

 

“Oh, yeah, Daniel.  You’re different.  You’re intelligent, capable, professional, decisive, intuitive, independent, open-minded, and did I mention brilliant?  You leave me in the dust all the time.  And you’re damn hard to keep alive.”

 

Grinning, Daniel agreed.  “I guess you left out stubborn, opinionated, argumentative, and arrogant.” 

 

“I guess I did, but you know, those are actually some of your best qualities.  I…I need you to work with me.  You can tell me I’m an asshole all you want, but just wait till we’re safe.  I don’t want to shut you up, I need your input.  I just need to follow the military discipline that keeps us coming home.  It’s bad enough that I’ve blown it by caring for all of you way more than I should.”

 

“Okay, I’ll tell you when you’re wrong – at an appropriate time – but I’ll tell you this too.  I do trust you and your judgment.  The only reason I can take the risks I do is because you’re there watching my back.  Yes, I used to be independent, but I’ve come to realize just how lonely it was out on that limb by myself.  You, you’re the wind beneath my wings.”

 

Jack’s eyes widened in horror.

 

Daniel smirked, “Got ya.”

 

Jack laughed with relief.  “Okay, so maybe we could, say, communicate a tad better.”

 

“I’ll do my stubborn, opinionated, argumentative best.”

 

“Works for me.  You ready for a little excursion to the living room to watch some TV?”

 

“If I get to pick the station.”

 

“Ha!  Don’t abuse your TV privileges, Danny, or I’ll set the remote to lock out the History Channel.”

 

“Fine, threaten the handicapped.  I’ll tell Janet.”

 

“Come on, you knucklehead.”

 

Jack held his arm as he climbed out of bed, then steadied him around the waist when wooziness made it hard to walk straight.   As they shuffled down the hall pressed tightly together Daniel began to hum, “Wind beneath my wings…”

 

 

~~*~~

 

Over the next few days they fell into a comfortable convalescent routine.  Daniel slept a lot and the rest of the time let Jack take care of him.  While this complacency was unusual, it sure did make things easier.  He thought that a lot of Daniel’s energy was probably going into recovering from the emotional trauma of the cave-in, as well as the physical.  He had spoken to Jack for the first time about what had happened to his parents, and Jack couldn’t blame him for having to put their ghosts to rest again.  It seemed to help Daniel to have him close, and that was all right with him.

 

For Jack it was a strange time of change, too.  It appeared that his life was beginning a new chapter and he was surprisingly okay with it.  It wasn’t that he could see a clear path or anything like that.  It was more of an acceptance of whatever would happen next.  The important thing was that he knew how he felt.

 

He felt love.  He had been dancing around the emotion, afraid to get too close.  Now it was simply there in his heart.  And it wasn’t just romantic love, though that was certainly part of it.  It was a deep desire for Daniel to be safe and happy.  He wanted Daniel to stay with him, but thought that if tomorrow his friend decided to get married and have kids he could be a doting uncle too. 

 

When they first knew each other, way back on Abydos, Daniel caused a shift in Jack that set him on a new path.  It was fitting that Daniel should be at the center of his life now, unknowingly moving him on again.  Something, someone, had healed his heart and he discovered that he could love after all.  Sweet.

 

 

~~*~~

 

Daniel dozed on the couch.  Even after several days the pain medicine kept him in between waking and sleeping a lot of the time.  As he moved toward waking he became aware of the rough weave of the couch fabric under his cheek, and of an unfortunate puddle of drool that only he could be responsible for.

 

Jack shook Daniel’s arm to rouse him and didn’t remove his hand after helping him sit up.  Daniel blinked awake and drank most of the orange juice in the glass he was given, then fiddled awkwardly with the rim.  He glanced at Jack’s hand on his arm.  This was as good a time to ask as any.

 

“So, Jack.  Um.  I’ve noticed lately that you’ve been,” he motioned toward the hand, “you know, touching me.  And, well, I just wondered…”

 

Jack’s expression remained neutral.  “Does it bother you?”

 

Daniel hurried to reassure him, “No!  No, it’s, um, nice.  I just wondered why.”

 

The other man regarded him for a moment before speaking.  “Since you asked, I’ll tell you.  You see, I had something of an epiphany down in that hole.  I’ve almost lost you too many times, and I finally faced what it would do to me if it happened for real.  If you had died there I would have just as soon they dumped the rock back in and left me there too.  I put everything in my life into perspective around that central fact.  I can’t lie about this, not even to myself.  I love you, Daniel, and I want to be as close to you as I can.  That’s why all the touching.”

 

Daniel gulped, trying to understand what Jack meant.  He heard his voice squeak, “Close?  How close?”

 

“As close as you’re comfortable with.  I’ve come to accept how I feel and have some hope that you do or will return it in some measure.  But it’s up to you.  You can set the pace in this relationship.”

 

Relationship?  Daniel’s heart pounded in his chest.  “I want to make sure I understand.  Are you saying that you want us to be together?  Like, together?”

 

“Only if that’s what you want.  It seems that you mean pretty much everything to me.”

 

Daniel was flabbergasted.  This was the last thing he was expecting.  He blurted, “But we’re straight!”

 

Jack lifted a finger.  “Ah!  You mean you’re straight.”

 

Can we say mind-boggling?  “S.s.so you’re gay?”

 

“I’d say I’m more on the ‘bi’ part of the orientation spectrum.”

 

“No way.”

 

“Yes way.”

 

“No.”

 

“Yes.  What’s so strange?  I love whom I love.  I think society, the church, whatever, tends to force us into an artificial choice to go one way or the other.”  His eyes twinkled.  “I’ve never been too big on following stupid rules.”

 

Daniel’s shock was giving way to fascination.  Just when he thought he knew everything there was to know about Jack the older man surprised him.

 

“So how long have you been, er, bi?”

 

“Oh, long time.”

 

Jack was answering Daniel’s questions but there was something playful about his manner, too, as though he were teasing.  Or flirting.  Daniel realized that Jack enjoyed shocking him.  Well, he was an anthropologist by training and thus above being shocked.  Right.

 

“Tell me what happened.  How did you know?”

 

“Okay.  I’ll tell you about my sexual history if you tell me about yours.  Fair’s fair.  Deal?”

 

Daniel could only nod, not able to bring himself to really believe the direction the conversation was headed. 

 

Jack turned sideways and relaxed against the back of the sofa.  He continued, looking amazingly comfortable with the subject, “I guess you could say I was a normal kid.  Had hormones coming out through every pore.  At first it was the girls who got me going.”  His face took on a nostalgic glow.  “Man, the girls in my high school wore these tight, fuzzy little sweaters that made their breasts look irresistible.  I went around with a hard-on for about two years straight with no other goal in life than to get my hands on them.”  He cupped and squeezed the air in front of him, then sighed dramatically.  “Heaven.  The Holy Grail.”

 

Completely bemused, Daniel could only listen to these intimate revelations, hoping his mouth wasn’t hanging open.

 

Jack went on, “The first time I went all the way was my junior year, with Anita Hoveland in the back seat of my dad’s Camero.  Oh, yeah, home run out of the ballpark!  Nope, no question that girls were great.”

 

Daniel asked, “So what happened to broaden your horizons, so to speak?”

 

Jack’s gaze softened and turned slightly inward.  “My best friend all through high school was a guy named Randall.  We hung out together all the time, talked about everything.  He was black, and we were kind of an unusual pair.  We were living in St. Paul at the time and there was a mixed population in my neighborhood with lots of blacks up from Chicago.  It wasn’t much of an issue amongst the kids, but the adults made a big deal out of race and it carried over.  It was cool to be friends with kids of another color, but not BEST friends.  That meant Randall and I didn’t really fit into any social circle, which drew us that much closer.”

 

Jack shook his head.  “Anyway, one day early in our senior year we were looking at magazines in his parent’s basement and listening to the Rolling Stones.  We had his dad’s Playboys and there was a men’s muscle mag or two thrown in.  We were both getting really turned on from the pictures and I started rubbing myself through my jeans.  Randall said, ‘Man, I gotta get some relief before I explode,’ and pulled his cock out of his pants right there.  I was so hard I had my own out before I even thought about it.  We watched each other jack off.  Twice, actually.

 

“I guess that kind of thing happens to lots of guys, but we really liked it.  I couldn’t get the image of Randall’s hand moving on his dick out of my head.”

 

Daniel could understand that.  His own mental image of a seventeen year-old Jack masturbating in his friend’s basement was going to be hard to forget, and more than a little disturbing.

 

“Over the next few months we did some experimenting.  Watching, hand jobs, blow jobs, naked full-body contact.  We knew we weren’t supposed to be doing it, but we didn’t want to stop, it felt too good.  One time we were horny as hell and Randall lifted my legs over his shoulders, greased me up with something, and put it in.  Oh, yeah, way better than the girls and their fuzzy sweaters.”

 

Jack looked transported by his happy memory but Daniel was a bit overwhelmed by the idea of Jack taking it up the ass.  Overwhelmed and embarrassed to find himself aroused.  He gulped a swallow of orange juice and asked, “Then what happened?”

 

The other man shook himself out of his reverie, shifted position on the couch, and continued, “We were together the rest of the year, and went out with girls to keep up appearances.  After we graduated he went to college at Columbia and I came here to the Air Force Academy.  We still keep in touch.  He lives in NYC with the same partner for the last 20 years.  Eventually I married Sara and the rest is history.”

 

Daniel blinked.  “Wow.”

 

Jack slapped him on the knee.  “So, big fella.  What’s your story?”

 

“Me?”

 

“Yes, you.  You said you’d tell.”

 

“Right.  Well.  I’m straight.  I mean.  I’ve always been with women.”

 

“I kinda figured, but I want details.  Tell me about your first.”

 

“Um.”  Daniel was more impressed than ever that Jack could talk about this so easily.  He really had no choice but to say something.

 

“I wasn’t as precocious as you were.  I didn’t have that kind of girlfriend until I was a junior in college.” 

 

Jack didn’t look judgmental, just interested.  “But you started college early.  How old were you that year?”

 

“Eighteen, I guess.”

 

“Not exactly middle aged.  Go on.”

 

“As you so astutely pointed out, I was younger than everybody else.  Even when I was interested in a girl, she was never interested in me.  Who would want to go out with a skinny dweeb a couple of years younger?”

 

“Their loss.”  Apparently Jack was going to offer commentary all the way through.  Daniel sighed inwardly.

 

“My third year I met Mei Hon, an exchange student from mainland China.”

 

“You were at UCLA then, right?  What were you studying?”

 

“Anthropology.  I had to do that before taking graduate courses in Archaeo-Linguistics.”  Daniel was flustered by the interruptions, but now Jack waited quietly for him to go on.

 

“I was a geek and Mei had a strong accent and was very shy at first.  We started studying together and, well, one thing led to another.  She was definitely supposed to save herself for marriage but she had other ideas.”

 

“Knew a good thing when she saw it.”

 

“We were together about a year, then she broke up with me to go out with the guitar player in a garage band.”

 

“Ouch.”

 

“Yeah.  I didn’t have another girlfriend until Sarah Gardner in Chicago.  Then Shau’ri, of course.”  Daniel blushed.  “Shau’ri taught me a few things.”

 

Jack grinned.  “Never to old to learn, eh?”

 

Time to change the subject.  Daniel decided to try to get more information out of this remarkable opportunity.  “Jack, what’s it like, making love to another man?”

 

His friend looked at him thoughtfully.  “The mechanics are a little different, but other than that it’s pretty much the same as with a woman.  Basically, it depends on how you feel about the person.  If you’re just doing it for fun it can feel good and relaxing, like a Jacuzzi, but if you really care about the guy it can be much more than that.  I think so anyway.  I cared a lot about Randy, but we were too young to get serious.  Other than that most of my experience has been of the recreational variety.”

 

“Have you been with lots of men?”

 

“I’ve been around the block a couple of times but I don’t sleep with every guy I meet.”

 

Now the big question.  “Do you want to sleep with me?” 

 

Jack didn’t pause before answering, “If someday you want that, I would be honored.”

 

“I, Jack, I don’t know if I can…”

 

“It’s all right, Daniel.  I’m not telling you this to pressure you.  It’s just in case anything should happen to either of us.  I wanted you to know that I love you.”

 

“Me too, you know?”

 

“Yeah, I think I do.  Well.  Time for your meds and for me to start dinner.”

 

Jack left him alone with his thoughts, which swirled randomly in his head.  Yes, he loved Jack, but that way?  The question was confusing but exciting.  Oh, yes, definitely exciting.  Apparently there were still important questions in life yet to be answered. 

 

 

~~*~~

 

Returning from a check-up at the hospital, Jack steered Daniel toward the back deck and settled him in the sun.  Daniel had been pensive since ‘The Coming Out’, as he thought of it, but not distant.  Jack brought them both lemonade and relaxed in the chair next to his friend.  He could almost hear the wheels turning in his friend’s head, and wasn’t surprised to hear a tentative, “Jack.”

 

“Yes, Daniel?”

 

“I think we should kiss.”

 

Jack turned to look at the handsome, solemn face.  “That’s quite a leap, isn’t it?”

 

“Not really.  It’s the part I’m unsure about, so I might as well do some experimenting.”

 

“The part you’re unsure about?  You mean the ‘being-gay-getting-physical-with-another-man’ part?”

 

“Yes, that’s exactly what I mean.”

 

“Look, Daniel, there’s no need to rush into anything.  I gotta tell you that the sex part comes in second to the ‘how-much-I-care-about-you’ part.  We can just work on that for a while.”

 

“No, you don’t understand.  I know how I feel about you.  Like it or not, the relationship, as you put it, is already there, and yes, I feel about you as I would about a romantic partner as well as a best friend.  I don’t have to spend a lot of time figuring out if I love you.  Duh.   It’s the sex that’s the big obstacle.  Can’t quite wrap my mind around that yet.  But you know, there’s nothing better than learning by doing, so what do you say?”

 

Jack chuckled.  “I say that now you’re moving too fast for me.  I know you love me, Daniel.  I just don’t want you to turn it sexual because you think it’s what I want.  I want you to be sure of yourself.”

 

Daniel whined impatiently, “Jaaack!  How am I going to know unless I try?  All I said was that we should kiss, for god’s sake.  I wasn’t going to rip your clothes off right here!”

 

“Oh.  Well if you put it that way it does seem reasonable.”  He turned his chair so that he was facing the other man, butterflies suddenly racing in his stomach.  Maybe he wasn’t as indifferent as he had thought.

 

He leaned closer to Daniel and said, “I would like to kiss you.  I think you’re pretty gorgeous.”

 

“You, too.”

 

Jack raised his eyebrows doubtfully.

 

“I mean, Jack, that I’ve always thought you were a handsome man.  You’re actually getting more so all the time.  It’s pretty remarkable, really; the more your hair grays the more gorgeous you are.  You must have very good genes.  And the way you wear clothes!  High paid models would be jealous.”

 

“You really think I’m good looking?”

 

“I just said so.  I may have been straight, but I was never blind.”

 

“Have been?  As in past tense?”

 

“Well, my thoughts have sort of been crossing the line recently.  Straying more toward the ‘bi’ part of the spectrum.”

 

Jack grinned.  “Welcome to the dark side, Rock Boy.”

 

Daniel looked surprised.  “Dark side?  Personally, I think of it more as a light coming on.”

 

“You know, you still never cease to amaze me.”  He leaned closer.  “I love you.”

 

“I love you, too, Jack.”

 

Their eyes locked.  This was the moment of truth.  Jack briefly sucked his lower lip into his mouth, wondering what it would be like to kiss Daniel, this brilliant man who meant so much to so many people.  He looked at Daniel’s lips speculatively and then back up to the sky-blue eyes.  Gorgeous.

 

He leaned forward at the same time Daniel did, and turned his head the same way Daniel did, and their noses collided somewhat painfully.  In unison they said, “Ow.”

 

They pulled back and smiled at each other.  Jack reached up to hold Daniel’s face between the palms of his hands.  “Let’s try that again.”  He moved forward slowly and brought his lips in to touch Daniel’s.  It was a slight, dry brush of skin against skin, and the most powerful thing Jack could ever remember experiencing. 

 

He gasped and Daniel grabbed Jack’s head and pulled him in again.  This time they devoured each other’s lips, rubbing and nipping and sucking enthusiastically.  The fire grew in Jack’s belly, in his groin.  The taste, the smell, the feel of Daniel was just too much.  He forgot anything else in the world existed until in his eagerness Daniel bumped his cast against Jack’s shoulder and pulled away abruptly, his face going white as he cradled his wrist against his chest. 

 

Jack stroked and petted him, murmuring, “Sorry, babe.  Are you all right?  Should have been more careful.”

 

Daniel smiled at him wanly.  “No harm done.  At least I now know that kissing you is definitely hot.  And I have a sure-fire way to cool down again if I need it.”

 

“It was good, huh?”

 

“Yeah, it was good.  What’s next?  Bed?”

 

Now Jack laughed out loud.  “Whoa there!  We’re taking this slow.  Not only do you have an arm that needs cosseting, but you’re still on some substantial pain meds.  I need to be sure, Daniel, I do, that you’re really with me on this.  Clear headed and making an informed decision.”

 

Daniel leaned forward and kissed Jack again.  “Never been more in my right mind than I am now.”

 

“Okay.  Next lesson is lying on the couch together while we watch a DVD.  I know you’re a fast learner, but do you think you can handle that?”

 

“As long as I can handle you, I’ll be ahead of the curve.” 

 

Not for the last time Jack said to himself, ‘I think I created a monster.’

 

 

~~*~~

 

Cuddling went extremely well and they practiced at every opportunity.  Lockdown had been lifted at the base but there was no mention of moving Daniel back, so they settled into the comfortable domesticity of the arrangement.  Jack went to work during the day and wrapped his arms around Daniel in the evening. 

 

For his part, Daniel was slowly reducing the amount of painkillers he was taking, only to have them bumped back up when Jack found out about it.  It was frustrating as hell to Daniel, as the drugs dulled both the pain and his mind, but didn’t quell the other sensations demanding attention in his body.

 

One evening as rain fell in torrents outside, Jack was leaning against the arm of the couch with Daniel between his legs while watching a cop show on TV.  Daniel asked, “So which do you think is cuter, Jim or Blair?”

 

“Cuter?”

 

“Yeah.  I mean, Blair is an anthropologist, which is of course the superior profession, but Jim?  That guy’s just, wow!  What a bod.”

 

Jack craned his neck to peer at Daniel’s face.  “You looking at the cop’s body?”

 

Daniel teased, “Sure.  I have a well developed sense of esthetic appreciation.  What about you?  Which do you like?”

 

“I’ve always had a thing for long hair, so I guess I’ll go for the little one.”

 

They watched for a few minutes, then Jack said, “They’re so doing each other.”

 

Now Daniel was surprised.  “They…what?”

 

“Oh, yeah.  Just look at them, always touching and gazing into each other’s eyes.   Definitely doing each other.  They’re just pretending to be straight because of Jim’s job.”

 

That was something Daniel had been meaning to bring up.  “Speaking of which, what do you intend to do about that.  I mean, we’ll pretend too, but if anyone finds out…”

 

Jack tightened his arms around Daniel.  “What do I intend to do about it?  Nothing.  There’s this stupid reg about no gays in the military, but they themselves know that it’s impractical and undesirable, so they hypocritically invented ‘Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell.’  Fine, I’ll follow their policy.  If they don’t ask, I won’t tell.  If they do ask, I won’t deny it.  I’m not ashamed of you, Daniel.  I won’t betray you.”

 

Daniel frowned.  “But if someone finds out you could lose your job or worse.”

 

“I’ll tell you something.  The truth is that the SGC needs me more than I need it.  If they make an issue of it I’ll retire, and fuck them.  It’d be their loss.  I have enough clout to make sure there’s no threat of jail time.  We’ll be okay.”

 

“You’re sure?”

 

“Very.  And as for the team, you and I’ve been too involved with each other for a long time.  I expect things will go more smoothly now that we’re beginning to figure things out.  Don’t worry.”

 

“Okay.”  Daniel was determined to be very careful.  It was just wrong that Jack could be made to suffer for what was between them. 

 

Jack asked, “So would you do the cop?”

 

Daniel responded promptly, “No, I would only do you.”

 

“Good answer.”

 

They watched an improbable chase scene that had Jack snorting in derision, then turned the TV off at the end of the program.  Daniel wiggled around so that he was lying on top of Jack, looking into his face.

 

“Speaking of doing you.”

 

He leaned down to devour Jack’s mouth, tongues tangling, every cell in his body zinging at the stimulation.  He rubbed his growing erection against the other man’s thigh meaningfully, aware that Jack’s body was responding to him, too.

 

“I think we’ve got cuddling and necking down pretty well, Jack, don’t you?  Isn’t it time to step up the action a bit?”

 

A bit breathless, the colonel answered, “Your meds…”

 

Daniel interrupted by thrusting his hardness against Jack.  “Does that feel drug induced to you?  I’m on Vioxx, not Viagra.  I want you, Jack, so much.”

 

“Okay, okay.  Sit up.”

 

When they were sitting next to each other, Jack asked, “So, what did you have in mind, you little monster?”

 

Daniel slid his good hand across his new lover’s belly and cupped his genitals.  “Something like this.”  Despite his best intentions, the feeling of Jack’s hardness under his hand was shocking.  Then he felt the organ twitch like a live thing and his mind was completely blown.

 

Jack’s whole body quivered, and he reached over to touch the bulge in Daniel’s pants.  The contact sent a bolt of electricity coursing through Daniel.  He groaned, arching against the back of the couch, and gripped Jack harder.

 

Jack gasped and lifted his hand away.  He directed, “Unzip.”

 

Daniel had to release Jack in order to comply, but soon they both had their pants open, erections pointing at the ceiling.  Hands at their sides, they just looked at each other for a moment.  Yes, it seemed slightly surreal to be sitting on the couch with Jack, hard-ons waving in the air, but it was the most exciting thing Daniel had ever done.

 

He requested, “Touch yourself, Jack.  I want to see your hand on it.”

 

Jack closed his eyes and took a deep breath, then looked at Daniel as his fingers wrapped around his own organ.  Daniel could see nothing but that plum-colored column of flesh, a hand stroking up and down.  His own cock leapt at the sight.  He murmured, “Yes, like that.”

 

Jack used his other hand to reach across and take hold of his straining penis.  He began to stroke both of them in unison and Daniel started to feel himself blacking out.  It was too much.  His entire awareness was centered in his cock, and his heart was trying to pump all the blood in his body in that direction.  He cried, “Jack!”

 

Daniel wasn’t conscious of the fact that Jack had taken his hand away until he noticed the other man kneeling on the floor between his legs, stroking up his thighs and ribs as he lowered his head.  Daniel felt warm moisture at the end of his cock and that was it.  He jerked and came harder than he’d ever come in his life, and Jack sucked and drank his semen down like a favorite beer on a hot day. 

 

When he was able, Daniel grabbed Jack’s shoulder with one hand and pulled him up to sit straddling his lap.  Surprisingly, the older man’s penis was hanging limply over the jeans zipper.  Looking up at Jack’s face, his lover smiled at him.

 

“I’m going to have to get some upholstery cleaner for the mess I made of the couch.”

 

Daniel blinked.  “God, Jack.  That was amazing.  Now bed?”

 

“Ah, enthusiastic bugger, aren’t you?  Now we get used to this for a while.”

 

“When can we do it again?”

 

“Give me a minute.  Old man, here.  Love you.”

 

They wrapped their arms around each other and held on tight.  Daniel began plotting to get them out of their clothes as soon as possible.  He wanted no layers between Jack and him.  No barriers.  He wanted it all.

 

 

~~*~~

 

Jack was dropping poison into one of the gopher holes ruining his lawn.  Generally a friend of animals, in this case the evil bastards had to die.  You’d think that they were taking lessons from the Goa’uld in territorial acquisition and destruction.

 

He heard a noise and turned around to see Daniel sitting on top of the picnic table.  Daniel was completely naked, except for Jack’s leather jacket, which he wore on one arm and draped over the shoulder of the other, the one with the cast.  And he wasn’t just sitting; he was posed languidly, leaning back on his arm with his legs falling open in invitation.  Daniel was blinking and looking around the yard causally, as though unaware of any seductive pretense.

 

Jack wanted to growl but could only gape.  In the pale spring sunlight Daniel’s skin shown like burnished gold, stretched smoothly over swells of muscle and ridges of bone.  His semi-hard cock rose from a nest of golden-brown curls.  He and Daniel had gotten naked together before, but this was…

 

He choked, “Daniel?”

 

Daniel looked at him with his eyebrows raised, pretending to be surprised to see him there.  “Oh, hi Jack.  Are you busy?”

 

“Busy?”  He dropped the trowel and the cone of gopher poison into the grass and stepped close to Daniel.  “No, I’m not busy.  Did you have something in mind that we might do?”

 

Daniel cocked his head coquettishly, all blue eyes and lashes, and said, “Yes, I thought you might make love to me.”

 

“Hmm.  I think I could fit that into the schedule.”  He reached out and ran his hands over skin, under leather.

 

Daniel let him explore at will.  He added casually, “I mean that I want you to make love to me.  All the way.  Full sex.”

 

Jack stilled.  They had been over this before.  Jack wanted to wait.  “My answer to that is the same as it was yesterday.  Not yet.  Meds, remember?  And injury.  It’s not time.”

 

“Jack.”  The pose was sensual but there was the strength of steel underneath.  “It isn’t entirely up to you.  This is a partnership and my opinion carries some weight too.  I say it is time.”

 

Jack stepped back and glared at his lover.  He began, “Daniel,” but was interrupted.

 

Daniel sat up straight to face Jack, the Mata Hari act over.  “Look, I’m on the lowest level of meds that I’m going to be on for a long time.  Day after tomorrow I go in for the final surgery and then I’ll be back at full dosage.  Then there’ll be weeks of recovery before the no doubt exhausting physical therapy begins.  It may be months before I’m in the perfect health you insist on.  I don’t want to wait.”

 

Argument clearly worked out, he went on, “Jack, I’ve enjoyed everything we’ve done.  You’ve been remarkably restrained and considerate, and it was a good idea to make me wait each time before doing more.  Now I’m totally comfortable with being your lover, except for that one thing.  The, uh, penetration part is hanging over me like a great black cloud.  Sword of Damocles time, here.   I want to get it over with so it won’t be such a big deal.”

 

“Daniel, it doesn’t have to be a big deal.  We don’t have to do it at all.  There’s no hurry and I don’t want you pushing farther than you’re ready for.”

 

“It is a big deal because I want to do it but I’m afraid.  And also because you keep putting it off and making it one.  Don’t make me wait any more.  Make love to me and put me out of my misery.  This is the right time, and I want you now!”

 

When Daniel had his mind made up Jack didn’t have much of a chance, but he felt uncomfortable about this.  It was a step he very much wanted to take, but he wasn’t sure.  And the nipple peeking out from behind the black leather was distracting.

 

Jack cupped Daniel’s face in the palms of his hands and kissed him gently, driving some of the tension out of his friend’s body.  “I don’t want to hurt you, Daniel.  I love you so damn much that I don’t always think straight, and I don’t want to do anything that we’re going to regret later.  You understand that?”

 

Daniel took his hands and held them firmly.  “I understand, and I’m telling you that I think it would be a mistake to wait.  We would regret it.  Trust me, Jack.  I want you to make love to me.”

 

Jack closed his eyes and leaned his forehead against Daniel’s.  Daniel was right that if they didn’t do it now it might be a long time before they could, and he didn’t want Daniel to suffer needlessly.  And it was time for him to step out of the role of he-who-knows-more-about-this, and treat Daniel like an equal partner.  The man had come so far so fast, and it was all because he loved Jack.  He decided that their love was up to this.  His dick certainly was.

 

He nodded.  “Okay.”

 

Daniel pulled back.  “Okay?  Did you say okay?  We’re going to do it?”

 

“Yes, we’re going to do it.  The big ‘I’ ‘T’.   But you’re going to have to do one thing.  You’re going to have to stop thinking.  This is not a thinking-related activity, it’s a feeling one.  It’s a body thing.  You’re going to have to let go and trust me, too.”

 

Daniel nodded, his eyes suddenly wide.  “Okay.  Sure.  I can do that.  Tell you what, why don’t I just go take a shower first?  Meet you in the bedroom.”

 

He jumped off the table and practically scampered into the house, the wood grain of the table imprinted on his backside.  Jack followed more slowly, trying to bring himself into the right frame of mind.  He felt a responsibility to Daniel, to keep him safe.  Then he chuckled and reminded himself to take his own advice and not think too much.  Like there was really any question that making love to Daniel would be anything but great.

 

After getting the bed ready, he waited for Daniel to finish his long shower.  Daniel was still self-conscious about his body and had a cleanliness thing going big-time.  Later on Jack planned to introduce him to the joys of funky, sticky sex, but for now he was willing to indulge the man if it made him feel more secure.

 

Daniel finally left the steamy bathroom, scrubbed pink and glistening.  He stood with a towel around his waist and gulped.  “Um.”

 

Gesturing broadly toward the bed Jack said dramatically, “Make yourself comfortable, mon cher.  I shall shower and then we shall begin.”  The younger man nodded and inched away, allowing Jack to slip past him into the bathroom. 

 

Jack loved Daniel so much he could barely stand it.  As he showered he smiled and thought about all the different facets to Daniel’s character; the arrogant scientist, the caring diplomat, the no-longer-innocent teammate, the steady friend, the shy lover who was not quite sure of himself, the demanding lover who knew exactly what he wanted.  Each and every one of them filled Jack with joy.  He had so much more to share with Daniel, and looked forward to every minute of it. 

 

He dried off, hung the towel on the rack and walked into the bedroom, ready to take the next step with Daniel.

 

Jack took in the sight of his friend lying naked on his bed, every perfect inch on display for Jack’s enjoyment.  Daniel himself was inspecting Jack with every indication that what he saw had been deemed acceptable.  Each part of his body responded in turn as Daniel’s eyes slid over him and he marveled at the way that visual caress made him feel like the sexiest man in the universe. 

 

Because he knew Daniel so well, he could see that beneath the leer the reality was more like, ‘I don’t know what the hell I’m doing, but I’ll be damned if I’m going to show it.’   Jack smiled.  That was his Danny; brave to the point of reckless.  Well in this case he was going to make sure that there was nothing to fear.  In fact, if he had anything to do with it, and manifestly he did, this was going to be one of the best experiences of Daniel’s life.

 

Moving closer to the bed, Jack took a moment to just look into Daniel’s eyes, trying to communicate all the love and respect he had for the man who was trusting him with his body and heart.  Daniel stared up at him for a moment, and then he got it.  A soft, radiant smile was his answer to Jack.  Then Daniel asked quietly, “Are you coming to bed?”

 

“Yes.”

 

It crossed his mind to remind Daniel not to think, but now was not the time for words.  Either Daniel had gotten the message or he hadn’t.  In either case Jack was ready to love his friend’s socks off, so to speak.

 

He knelt on the mattress and let his gaze drift over the waiting body, noting the slight blush touching his cheeks and upper chest, the small brown nipples that were already pebbled in anticipation, the accelerated respiration causing the flat belly to quiver, and the partially filled penis.  Jack had never seen anything more erotic in his life; Daniel’s body wanted him.

 

The plaster-encased arm rested by Daniel’s side and Jack leaned over to lift it carefully in both hands.  He lowered his head to briefly kiss the fingertips peaking out the end, then moved to place it beside Daniel’s head where it would be out of harms way.  He slowly ran his fingers down the cast, over the bent elbow and back up the soft underside of the bicep, finishing the caress by brushing a smooth cheek.  Everything would be slow today and, for the moment, gentle.  Jack planned to drive his lover crazy with pleasure, culminating with the joining of their bodies.

 

He shifted to kneel straddling Daniel’s strong thighs, his own opened widely so that he wasn’t touching his lover, then leaned forward to place his hands either side of Daniel’s head and cast.  He hovered for a long moment, holding the wide-eyed gaze before dropping his head to within an inch of the other man’s.  Jack brushed his lips dryly around the corner of Daniel’s mouth, pulling away when he tried to turn into the kiss.

 

When Daniel gaped at him in surprise, he reassured, “Ssshhh.” Daniel frowned and thought for a moment, then nodded to indicate that he would follow Jack’s lead. 

 

Once again Jack dipped down to brush his cheek against his lover’s and then nuzzle an exposed ear.  He blew lightly into the opening and was rewarded with an answering gasp.  Daniel turned his head and stretched his neck out, offering it to Jack, who was sorely tempted to forget the plan and go straight for devouring the younger man whole.  Instead he simply breathed on the enticing skin and waited again until Daniel squirmed impatiently, wanting more stimulation.

 

Jack was glad to oblige.  This time he lowered himself until only their chests touched, heart resting atop heart, faces inches apart.  Holding still for a moment, Jack drank in the heat of Daniel’s body, rejoicing in the life so close to his own.   Then he lifted up barely half an inch and began to move sideways, back and forth, brushing his chest hair over Daniel’s skin, allowing only the softest tickle of contact. 

 

Daniel gasped again and let his head fall back, mouth open to draw in oxygen.  When he swept the soft hair across a nipple Daniel arched, instinctively searching for more.  Jack looked down between their bodies and noticed with satisfaction that the other man was now fully, impressively aroused. 

 

He shifted a bit lower so that he could use his lips to graze newly sensitized skin.  The surface of Daniel’s chest was hot but smooth as he used his teeth to survey the expanse.  Allowing himself the briefest touch of tongue to nipple, he blew a stream of air across the moistened nub. 

 

Daniel arched under him again, this time groaning as though in pain along with it.  His good hand, which had been spread flat on the bed, suddenly clutched at Jack’s back, trying to draw him closer.  He maneuvered the hand down to the mattress and held it there firmly, sure that Daniel would get the message, then returned to slowly driving him mad.

 

Jack kissed Daniel’s belly, teasing the line of fine hair that lead downward.  He had to contort himself to be able to do this without touching the rosy cock standing out from Daniel’s groin, but it was worth it to feel the shudders in the body beneath him. 

 

As the exploration led down one thigh Daniel tried to open his legs but quickly met the obstacle of Jack’s arms.  Jack knew what he wanted and paused, hovering over the resplendent cock, admiring it, desiring it.  He looked up to make sure Daniel was watching, and indeed the blue eyes were riveted to the intimate scene.  He opened his mouth and slowly, to give the full benefit of the anticipation, moved down to the bobbing head. 

 

By the time Jack touched his tongue to the target Daniel was panting raggedly with desire.  He nibbled along the edge of the organ then swirled his nose around one of the furry brown balls.  Daniel started to emit small, staccato moans in time with his rapid breaths.  Jack had never been with anyone more responsive, more open to his attention.  It was quite something from someone who, only days before, had doubted his ability to be sexual with another man.

 

There was a whole world of tactile sensation Jack wanted to introduce Daniel to, but for now it was time to move on before the excitement became painful.  He again shifted to his knees beside the supine man.  He commanded softly, “Turn over.”

 

Daniel eagerly did as he was told, barely allowing time for Jack to position a pillow under his belly so that his distended genitals weren’t mashed directly into the mattress.  This time he spread his legs before Jack could trap them, providing his first real look at what was on offer.  It was beautiful.  Perfect.  He wanted it right that very minute.  Jack asked the gods to give him strength.

 

His own arms trembling slightly, Jack resumed his position on all fours over his lover.  He nuzzled the enticing ear again and drank in the aroma of clean hair and skin, then lapped daintily at the nearby neck until Daniel wriggled. 

 

This time he used his hands to touch and massage down Daniel’s back, relaxing and connecting with his partner.  He kept going when he reached Daniel’s butt, covering the firm pads of muscle with his palms and massaging them with a push/pull motion.  He let his thumbs stroke farther and farther into the crack between.  Daniel sighed into his pillow, face partially hidden behind the plaster cast.

 

Jack looked forward to sending his responsive lover through the roof with the delights of rimming, but for this first time he thought he should keep it simple to reduce the potential for freaking out.  He kissed and laved the dimples at the small of Daniel’s back as he fumbled to get some lube from the strategically placed bottle onto his fingers.  Then, holding the prepared hand in reserve, he nibbled his way back up Daniel’s body until he could rub his cheek against the other man’s. 

 

He whispered, “I love you, Daniel,” and this time met the mouth that sought his.  He poured his love and desire into the kiss and felt Daniel moving beneath him, pushing his pelvis into the mattress and back up, searching for Jack’s body. 

 

It was finally time.  Jack lowered himself so that his erection pressed against the curve of Daniel’s buttock.  When his aroused friend rubbed against him, he shifted slightly so that his length moved down the crack, over the puckered opening, along the perineum, and against the back of Daniel’s balls.  As he stroked across that sensitive corridor, he had to hold his breath and concentrate on controlling his urge to move harder and faster.  Not yet, not yet.

 

This time when the man under him tried to spread his legs Jack let him, fitting both of his own between Daniel’s.  He positioned himself so that he could reach between them to stroke a wet finger back and forth over Daniel’s anus.  The brown-blonde head came up and he murmured to the headboard, “Oh god, oh god, oh god.  Yes, yes, yes.” 

 

Jack leaned forward to bite the skin where Daniel’s neck met his shoulder, using that moment of erotic pain to distract while he slid his fingertip into the opening.  Daniel cried, “Oh!” and bucked under him.  He pushed the finger in farther.

 

Daniel turned his head and gasped over his shoulder, eyes burning, “How does it feel, Jack?  What does it feel like inside me?”

 

Jack whispered in response, “Like velvet.  You feel like warm, wet velvet.  You’re going to feel so good around my cock.”  He plunged the finger in and out, caressing the tight passage.

 

Daniel demanded, “Do it, Jack.”

 

“Soon, babe, soon.”

 

He added another finger, twisting them to widen the entrance.

 

Daniel pushed back against him, forcing Jack up so that he could get to his knees, positioning himself in blatant invitation.  “Now.”

 

“Soon.”

 

Daniel mewled as Jack added the third finger, sounding like he didn’t know whether to feel discomfort or desire.  Jack prodded him in the direction of desire by reaching around to handle the full cock.  Daniel bucked sharply at the stimulation, pleading, “Jack!  Jack!”

 

Jack removed his fingers, quickly coated his own member, and placed it at Daniel’s loosened opening.  “Now, Daniel.  I’m going into you now.”

 

He pushed until the head of his cock popped past the ring of guardian muscle, then a couple of inches more.  Daniel was tighter and hotter than he ever could have imagined, squeezing Jack’s erection and sending waves of sensation through him.  It took a moment for his lust-addled body to communicate the change in his lover to his brain.  Daniel’s insistent writhing had disappeared, replaced by tense, stiff endurance. 

 

Jack succeeded in holding still despite the imperative to thrust.  He panted the question, “Daniel?”

 

His voice tight, Daniel answered, “It hurts.  It’s horrible.  How could anyone enjoy this?” 

 

Crap.  Jack had feared something like this.  He tried to encourage, “Just wait.  You will.”

 

Daniel shook his head, “No.”

 

Jack rested his forehead on the sweat-slick back and groped below, only to find Daniel’s erection completely wilted.  He concentrated on taking deep, calming breaths while he thought.  If he pulled out now, Daniel would probably never bring himself to try again, and would never know how good it could be.  On the other hand, if he went ahead as his own body demanded, Daniel would rightly never trust him.  He decided to buy some time, falling back on one of his linguist’s favorite things, words.

 

“I remember my first time.  I remember what a shock it was to feel something inside me where it wasn’t supposed to be.  I had the advantage of being seventeen, with a young, hormone-laden body.  Not that you’re old, of course, it’s just that at that age the body is more flexible.  Even so, I needed to breathe through it at first.  I wanted to continue, so I tried to get used to it.”  Daniel’s body began to relax as he listened, and Jack stroked his cock gently.

 

“It took a while, but I started to think about how it wasn’t just any old thing inside me, it was my best friend.  He loved me and wanted to be as close to me as physically possible.  He wanted me and wanted me to want him.  That’s how it is now, Daniel.  I love you and I want to give you pleasure.  That’s what being inside you is about.”  The death-grip around his erection eased a fraction.  “It’s going to be good,” he promised.  “We’re going to be connected in the most amazing way.”

 

Daniel wiggled slightly, checking the situation behind and increasing the contact in front.  His penis was starting to twitch again.  Daniel admitted, “I do want this to work.  I know you say it’ll be good.”

 

“Then relax.  Trust me.  Let me show you how much I love you.”  He kissed Daniel’s back, letting Daniel support some of his weight as he used one hand to pump the returning erection while the other slid over the muscular chest, brushing nipples and caressing as much skin as he could reach. 

 

The man below him nodded, “Okay,” and Jack pushed in a little farther.  Daniel took and released a deep breath and nodded again.  He pressed in inch by inch until he was fully sheathed within his lover. 

 

He whispered, “That’s it, I’m all the way inside you.  How does it feel, Daniel?  How do I feel inside you?”

 

Daniel murmured, “I feel full.  Full of you, full of your love.  It’s good.”

 

Jack eased most of the way out then thrust slowly back in.  “I’m going to make it better.  I’m going to make you fly.”

 

With each deliberate thrust Jack changed angle slightly, searching.  Soon he heard a surprised, “Oh!” and felt the blood pulsing in Daniel’s cock.  Bingo.  He nibbled on the back of Daniel’s neck and increased the pace of his thrusts, still reminding himself that this was for the other man.  It all had to be about Daniel’s pleasure.  He reflected that there were in fact advantages to being an old guy.  He could never have managed this restraint when he was seventeen- it was hard enough now.

 

Soon Daniel began to undulate beneath him, loosing himself in the responses of his body.  Jack thrust harder and deeper.  “Oh, Daniel.  Need you, Daniel.”

 

Now Daniel was writhing, seeking his release, and Jack had to wrap his arm around his enthusiastic partner’s waist to keep them from slipping apart.  They found a pounding rhythm that worked for both of them and Jack gave up thinking, gave up control.  He let himself feel how wonderful it was to be making love to Daniel, his heart swelling along with his cock. 

 

Daniel bucked then cried out inarticulately as his orgasm rushed through him, to be ejected over Jack’s hand and the mattress.  Jack let himself drive in farther, seeking deepest penetration, then he was pouring himself into the depths of the other body, stars flashing inside his head with the ecstasy.  “Daniel!”

 

Next thing he knew he was lying on his back, on the wet spot, with Daniel propped up on one elbow beside him, watching him.  He blinked at the beautiful, relaxed face and reached up to brush his fingers over the perfect lips.  “You’re glowing.”

 

Smiling affectionately, Daniel quipped, “I should hope so, I went off like a rocket.  The proverbial fireworks.”  He observed Jack for a moment then said, “Thank you.  You were wonderful.  You’ve given me a great gift.”

 

“Aw, shucks, ‘twern’t nothin’.  Then again, I don’t want to sound greedy, but you can give it back any time you want.”  He noticed the injured arm resting on Daniel’s naked thigh and quickly rolled over to face his lover.  “Are you all right?  I mean down there, but your arm, too.  I forgot about it for a while.”

 

“I’m fine.  Never better, and I really mean it this time.  I’m very happy.”

 

“Happy?  It’s good to know that we can do happy.”

 

“We certainly can.”

 

 

~~*~~

 

Daniel lay between Jack’s legs, his nose brushing pubic hair each time he slid the long cock into his throat.  This was another new skill that benefited from repetition.  His CO was generous in allowing Daniel to use him as a training implement.

 

Daniel pulled back and slid the lovely phallus out of his mouth.  He asked, “How was that?”

 

Jack’s voice sounded a little constricted.  “Good.  That was good.”

 

“But I still need to practice, right?”

 

“Huh?  Practice?  Yeah.  Practice is good.  Anytime.”

 

Then the phone rang.  Jack looked around as though wondering what the noise was, then eyed the phone on the bedside table with hostility.  Daniel could tell he was thinking about ignoring it, but his training won out in the end.  Jack grabbed the handset and said, “O’Neill,” at the same moment that Daniel began to lick his erection like a dripping ice cream cone, with long swipes and tiny bites.

 

Jack managed to choke out, “Hello, General.”

 

Daniel was amused.  This would be a good time to see just how well this Special Ops expert could control himself.  He nibbled on the dark head bobbing before him.

 

“Ah, no sir.  No problem.  Daniel and I were just…playing poker.”  Pause.  “Yeah, he’s a real card-sharp.  Who knew?”

 

Finished nibbling, he drew the first inch of hard Jack-flesh into his mouth.

 

“Yes, sir, I’ll be there.”  Then Jack’s eyebrows went up and he glared at Daniel accusingly.  “Yes, that is good news.”

 

Daniel’s cheeks hollowed as he rhythmically sucked his treat farther into his mouth.

 

“Aaahh.  Yes, sir, I’ll be sure to tell him, if I can get his attention away from the cards for a moment.”

 

Daniel’s head rocked up and down.  He savored the intoxicating heat and energy contained within the satiny skin.  It gave him a sense of power to have it inside his mouth, contained and controlled. 

 

The colonel said, “Right,” and hung up the phone.  Daniel looked up and praised, “You are good!  You didn’t give anything away at all.”

 

“Living dangerously, Danny-boy.”

 

That gave Daniel pause.  He had sworn to be careful of Jack’s position, and he’d just blown that to hell.  He would be careful next time.  Definitely next time.

 

Jack continued to glare.  “Did you forget to tell me something?”

 

“Huh?”  He resumed his snack.

 

“Like about your visit to the doctor today?”

 

His head came up.  “Oh!  I was going to tell you.  I guess I got distracted.”

 

“Blame it on me why don’t you?  George said he was glad to hear the good news.  What good news would that be, Daniel?”

 

“Well, Dr. Sorensen said that the operation was as successful as they thought, and that it looks to him like I’ll be getting at least ninety percent of my mobility and dexterity back.  That’s pretty good considering.”

 

Jack’s pique forgotten, his fingers caressed Daniel’s scalp.  “That’s good, love.”

 

“And Janet is clearing me for light duty as of tomorrow.”

 

“Really?  So they think eventually you’ll be up to going back into the field?”

 

“Yeah.  We’ll all have to keep in mind that I won’t have the same strength in that hand that I used to.  Janet says no hanging from cliffs by my fingertips, but I won’t be considered disabled or anything.”  Daniel grimaced.  “There’s still another month of PT, though.”

 

“I’m so glad, Daniel.  All in all I’d say that life is pretty good right about now.”

 

Daniel took Jack into his mouth again and the older man groaned, “Damn good.  Real damn good.”

 

Daniel agreed.

 

 

~~*~~

 

Jack frowned at the requisition form as he tried to decide how many MRE’s they were likely to need in the next quarter.  He had been scolded by the Supply Sergeant for losing too many fully provisioned packs, as though escaping with nothing but their lives was deliberate profligacy. 

 

There was a light knock and Jack looked up to find Daniel hovering in the doorway.  The usual thrill flickered through him at the sight of his lover.  He enquired with a sensual purr used only with one person, “Daniel?”

 

Daniel met Jack’s eyes, starting to speak without preamble.  “SG-12 is working on a treaty with the inhabitants of Greenhome, P6N-322, and they need to read some of the historical texts in order to get the formal wording to harmonize with their intentions and they asked if I would give them a hand.  They’ve been there three weeks as you know and there’s been no sign of hostilities so it’s probably perfectly safe.  I’d really like to go.”  He finally took a breath and watched Jack expectantly.

 

The thrill of pleasure turned into a shiver of dread in Jack’s gut.  Daniel wanted to go off world with another team.  He said sharply, “You’re injured.”

 

“I sit in my office here and work on translations and stuff.  It wouldn’t be that much different to sit in the library on Greenhome and do the same thing there.  I talked to Janet and she’s willing to sign off on it if I follow a whole list of conditions.  So can I go?”

 

Jack’s voice sounded flat even to him.  “Sure.  Fine.  Go if you want.  Don’t forget to write.”

 

His teammate frowned.  “It shouldn’t be more than a week.”  He took a couple of steps into the office, concern clear on his face.  “Jack?”  After a moment he continued quietly, “Jack, I don’t want to go to get away from you.  Not at all.  I’ll miss you every minute.  I always want to be with you.  Always.  You know that, don’t you?”

 

“Then why do you want to go?”

 

“Because it’s just so exciting!”  He bounced briefly then settled.  “It’s what I do.  Ancient cultures, languages, communication.  It’s what I’m good at and this is a great opportunity.  SG1 is on stand down until I’m ready for active duty, and I want to go where I’m needed.”

 

Jack told him, “I need you.”

 

Daniel’s features melted with longing and his face flushed – not from embarrassment.  “Oh, god, Jack.  I need you too.”

 

Jack let the fear go.  The light of enthusiasm in Daniel’s eyes was too precious to dampen.  He loved this about Daniel; the need to know, the need to experience, the need to help.  That he loved a grumpy old soldier was nothing short of a miracle and Jack wasn’t going to use it to repress those unique qualities.  Still…

 

Grinning wolfishly, Jack teased, “A week, huh?  That’s an awfully long time to postpone our poker game.”  He asked lightly, “Whatever shall I do without you?  Play solitaire?”

 

Daniel’s blush deepened and his eyes darkened.  He growled, “Well.  Maybe I won’t need to be gone a whole week.  Maybe I can stay a couple of days to get used to the verbal syntax and context, then bring some documents back here.  That way we can pick up the poker game where we left off.”

 

Suddenly serious, Jack said, “Wherever you go, Daniel, however long you’re away, I’ll always be waiting for you.  Always.”

 

The blue-eyed man smiled and Jack knew that they understood each other.  He held out the list of MRE codes.  “So, should we get chicken or something that tastes like chicken?  Whatever you want.”

 

Daniel choked on what he wanted to say and Jack answered silently, ‘You got me, babe.  No need to ask.’

 

 

End

 

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