happy valentine's day john! - the cool thing is that at least half of the pictures i used to make that were taken before me and john started dating...some of the pictures date back to 1997!!! so the pictures range from 1997 to 2002...see, it was all in God's plan :)

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valentine's day.

ok. so i'm writing this on march 8. but in case you wanted to know what me and the

MOST WONDERFUL BOYFRIEND I EVER HAD

did...we had a great time :)

on thursday night he surprised me. i won't say anything more than that. but i didn't think i was going to see him because i had class till 8 pm and he had 3 cousins that were here from korea. but he knew it was my very first valentines ever and so he surprised me. and i don't think i've ever been so happy and surprised and happy and happy in my life. we ate dinner afterwards.

and then it was the next day.

john the adorable, smart, wonderful sunshine of my life took me to san diego early friday morning (after valentines day cause i had class on thursday night) and we went to.....

SEA WORLD!

i didn't want to go cause it was so expensive, but he made us. and i had the BEST time.

we saw the manatees and the walrus and the sea otter and the sea lion and the polar bears and the sting rays and tons of different kinds of fish and shamoo and baby shamoo and other killer whales and beluga whales and penguins and turtles and dolphins and we went on this arctic ride thing and john's so nice he bought me churros and lemon slushy and popcorn.

it was so fun i was jumping out of my seat and smiling and so excited and my eyes were so wide open because i wanted to make sure that i saw everything.

i think john had more fun watching me enjoy everything than watching the shows.

AND THEN, after that i was tired but john, being as sweet as he is, let me sleep while he drove us to the Gaslamp (Gaslight?) District in San Diego. i woke up when we got there.

i wanted to eat ribs. (i was craving it) and so john, being assertive, asked a guy in a store where a good rib place was. so john, being so considerate, found it and we ate there! we ordered FIVE appetizers and whole rack of ribs!!!!! it was so fun! i ate so much!

AND THEN, i was really really full and i needed to walk around. so john and i walked around all the stores and restaurants and he let me look at all the things i wanted to see even though he didn't care about it (like this one neat furniture store that had neat girly stuff in it). john's so cute :)

AND THEN, he drove us to a place called Extraordinary Desserts thats famous for its...you got it! desserts! there was a line of like 15 people and everything! by the time we left, the like was like 25 people in line. each dessert was like $8. i was torn between two different types of desserts. and i think john wanted to get this one dark chocolate dessert. but guess what?????????? he told me to order the 2 that i wanted. i thought i was going to order the 2 i wanted and that he was going to order his. but you know what john did? being sacrificial, he let me get the 2 that i wanted and he didn't get one for himself. i felt really bad but i didn't know he wasn't going to get one. he's so nice.

and then we listened to the laker game as we drove home.

john teaches me a lot about love. he's very unselfish when it comes to me. i wish i could say the same about myself...but i'm learning. i never knew that i could be so selfish, but i'm learning a lot about myself through my relationship with him.

important thing that i'm learning - relationships can't last long when one person is selfish. the whole point in loving another person is that you want to give all that you can for them. kinda like your kids. you would never be selfish with your own children. my mom is so giving and generous when it comes to me it makes me uncomfortable. but i think it makes me uncomfortable because i'm not used to being around people who are willing to give everything and do anything for me in a split second. there's always a catch, a hesitancy, an unwillingness. but not with john. and not with my mom. not with my brother. and not with my dad (when it comes down to it).

with john, i'm selfish about his attention, not necessarily money or material things. the funny thing is that i didn't know i could get like this until i started dating john. i knew i would be "emotionally" high maintenance, but its funny because more than that, i just want to talk to him all the time. when something (or anything) happens to me, i think "I wanna tell john! ooo! i gotta tell john!" hhahaah....and then he just listens and listens. and listens and listens. and listens and listens.

and then when he talks for long periods of time...i fall asleep. and he gently and quietly whispers goodnight and then we hang up.

but when he falls asleep on me, i have a cow. "ARE YOU FALLING ASLEEP??? STAND UP! TURN ON THE LIGHTS! DO 20 JUMPING JACKS! DRINK SOME ICE WATER! PLEASE DON'T SLEEP!!!!"

see what i mean? i'm selfish.

i hope i'll learn soon.