February 10, 2001

Saturday

i went to ikea today with peter choi and lillian. it was peter's first time there and lillian told him he was no longer an ikea virgin, interesting way of viewing it, huh? i wanted to buy so many things there but since i may or may not be moving at the end of this semester, i had to resist the temptation...

can you see how this background is dizzy-ing? yeah...well that's how i felt at ikea, i promise there were hundreds upon hundreds of people there today...kinda disgusting the number of people there buying tons and tons of stuff that they don't really need (me included).

i wish i had a freaking nice body...(haha, that must catch you off guard). it's the truth, but, i'm sure everyone in the world wants a nice body.  anyways, so jennifer lopez was on snl today and it was just making me think of how much she must work out to get her abs...and then it went to commercial break and it was one of those victoria secret commercials where the camera is like one inch away from her chest and her zero fat stomach. how nice. 

in no way, shape or form do i do anything whatsoever to loose weight or get healthier. i eat ice cream, chocolate, pizza, bread, candy, cereal, burritos, scones, muffins....and then i think, "UGH. i wish i was thin." so silly, huh? all you ladies out there - can you feel me? haha

i keep on thinking that i'm gonna loose weight naturally or something... and the thing is, i think i'm going to be diabetic when i'm older (my grandma is diabetic type II - late onset) there are so many risks in being diabetic - increase risk of everything bad (in my psych 117 class we were looking at all these mri scans from diabetes related strokes and it was sooooo sad).  but i still feel like i'll loose weight once i graduate...especially if i move home...my mom's really good at keeping my eating in check...she knows how i can get eating all fatty foods and so she's like my food nazi at home...but not only that, if i get a full time job then that means i can't eat continuously till 2 in the morning and then sleep at 4 or 5 every night... by that time i'll be like 23,24 and i'm gonna feel a little more pressure to uh...you know, meet some people...you get my drift? haha...i'm gonna want to look and feel my best...

ironically, i feel and look my worst here at berkeley...apparently some guys know that also (there was a whole 'thing' between a few guys and a few girls here cause some of the guys think that us girls are unattractive cause we make no attempt to look decent...) its all good though, it's true, i don't think a lot of us put in tons of time on how we look (we're too busy studying, getting A's and volunteering at local shelters...haha! JUST KIDDING!).... i love that i can wake up, brush my teeth, just change my pajama pants into jeans and run out the door! haha...i don't wash my face in the morning =) i don't really brush my hair either...haha. yay! dude, in high school, make up was a necessity....in college make up is something you put on when you...um, well, i dunno... i suppose i put it on when i want to look better... but who really needs to do that? i guess some people want to...but, i mean, ultimately, our faces are our faces, right? we COULD put on color to accent certain features... but...i dunno... all i have to say is if make up REALLY REALLY made a difference on how i looked, i would wear it every day. HOWEVER, on days i wear make up and try to look nice, i'll get as much attention as when i look like i didn't sleep for a week and then got hit by a truck. so there.

blah blah...all that is stupid superficial stuff that need not bog me down. i am not of this world! 

side note/tangent - i'm still not a US citizen...i really need to get naturalized.

me and lillian ate so much for dinner i thought i was gonna barf.

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