4-12-04
“The Lord reigns, let the
earth be glad.“ Psalm 97:1
Dear Family and Friends,
Yesterday (Easter) sure would have been a great day for another resurrection
but, alas, the Lord must have other plans.
Things seemed to be going fine with Tim. We like the staff at Sunbridge. It is
encouraging to walk into Tim’s room and see his nurse’s aide, Lupe, kindly
talking to Tim as she gets him ready for the day. I told her how much I
appreciated the way she treated Tim. They have even asked me to bring in Tim’s
own clothes (t-shirts and sweat bottoms) - it is so great to see him in his own
clothes. Tim’s new wheelchair was delivered last week - it needs some tweaking
and adjusting yet, but it is really fabulous. It has a special seat on it that
it so comfortable, and it can be placed in many different reclining positions.
When Tim is put in his chair, he is so tall that it is like driving a stretch
limo, but the chair is so easy to maneuver - even Daniel can get Dad around
easily. We have been able to take him outside everyday that the weather has been
agreeable. We find a shady spot in the courtyard - I don’t know how aware Tim is
of his environment, whether he realizes that he is someplace different or not,
but it makes me feel good to take him out of his room and do something
different.
You may have noticed that I said earlier that things SEEMED to be going fine -
that’s because they were -until today. Yesterday, I noticed that Tim’s
respiratory rate had picked up a little bit. I checked his pulse and it seemed
to be a little quicker, too. But, he seemed to be resting easily and didn’t have
any other symptoms, so I hoped that it was nothing. When I got home, the kids
asked how daddy was (all three of the kids have colds right now, so they can’t
visit their dad) and I said, “I hope I’m wrong, but he may be getting sick.“
This morning when I stopped by I thought he sounded a little louder in his
breathing. This afternoon when I got to his room, he felt warm and his breathing
was pretty noisy. I checked his rate and it was up to 26 breaths a minute, and
his heart rate was over 120. I took his temp and it was about 100-101degrees.
So, I went out to the nurse’s station and said that I was pretty sure that Tim
was getting sick. They were great and listened to me - someone came right in and
checked his vitals, and they confirmed everything that I told them. So, the
doctor was called -he ordered a chest x-ray. Tomorrow, they will do a urinary
analysis and CBC. Either his UTI is back or he is getting pneumonia. Hopefully,
the infection hasn’t reached his bloodstream.
I feel so bad for Tim - he really hasn’t come back from his last infection -
hasn’t been able to respond and seems pretty tired most of the time. We would
appreciate prayer for him.
I got a great gift this week. A friend from Misawa who now resides in Texas sent
us a tape. When I was being treated for cancer, Tim often had to fly back to
Japan to put in a couple of weeks of work. He would try to time it so that he
would be back before I had another chemo treatment. Anyway, on one of his trips
back to Japan, he was asked to speak at the chapel - sort of an update for the
church family there on how I was doing. Tim spoke for about twenty minutes and
my friend happened to record it. I had not heard his comments before - it
brought tears to my eyes to hear his voice again, but I was so blessed and
encouraged by what he shared. He talked about the faithfulness of God. He talked
about trusting Him NO MATTER WHAT. He went on and on about the many answered
prayers we had seen and shared many scriptures. I thanked God so much for the
chance to hear Tim’s words - it was so timely because ever since Tim’s last
hospitalization, I had been feeling pretty low. I know that the enemy took
advantage of my physical and emotional fatigue. I would get these thoughts my
head, “It’s so hopeless. This is never going to end. You are such a burden to
everyone - people are going to get sick and tired of helping you. You’re heading
for disaster and ruin.“ Lies, all lies, but they are hard to fight when you are
worn out. It seemed , too, like there was one thing happening after another-
some financial issues came up, my grandfather passed away, and I had so much to
do -kind of felt like someone was turning up the heat and pressure in my life a
few notches. Then, to top it off, my car broke down. I kid you not, at that
moment I felt that if someone were to clap me on the back, I might just break
into a million pieces. I felt the need to remind the Lord that he was dealing
with a mere human being, made out of dust for crying out loud!, and that I had a
breaking point that was rapidly approaching. I read several chapters of Job that
evening, all the time muttering, “Yeah! What he said!!” God is so gracious,
though, and merciful. I probably deserved a swift kick in the seat, but what I
got was showered with His love.
Let me elaborate - my car broke down at my church, and inside of two minutes, my
friends had diagnosed the problem and found a car that I could borrow until mine
was fixed. Across the street, there was an auto shop. They were closed (it was
Saturday) but we parked the car in their lot and I intended to show up first
thing Monday morning to ask them to fix it. On Sunday, the pastor was making
announcements at the beginning of the service, and he mentioned that my car had
broken down. Before I left the church that day, the parts to my car were bought
and paid for and my car was being repaired. Absolutely amazing. As the week
progressed, things seemed to settle down, and God brought many people along to
encourage me. But, the kicker was hearing Tim’s voice and his faith on that
tape. I felt like I could get “back in the game” after listening to him speak.
I am so grateful for the help that we have received, for your prayers and
encouragement. I feel so undeserving of all the love that has been shown to us
by the body of Christ. God’s love toward us is like that, though - completely
undeserved, yet lavished upon us. I would appreciate prayer, too, that God would
give me strength. I think the most difficult time for me is when Tim becomes
ill. I thank God that my dear friend, Lisa, is here right now. She and her son,
Joel flew in from Michigan today. They are one half of one of our favorite
families (dad and Hannah stayed home) and always such an encouragement to be
around.
We should have some preliminary test results by tomorrow evening, I think, so I
will keep you posted on Tim’s health.
Love,
Carole
“He will have no fear of bad news.” Psalm 112:7
Christian, you ought not to dread the arrival of bad news; because if you are
distressed by it, how do you differ from others? Others don’t have your God to
fly to; they have never proved His faithfulness as you have done, and it is no
wonder if they are bowed down with alarm and cowed with fear: but you profess to
be of another spirit; you have been begotten again to a lively hope, and your
heart lives in heaven and not on earthly things; now, if you are seen to be
distracted as others, what is the value of that grace which you profess to have
received.? Where is the dignity of that new nature which you claim to possess?
Trust in the Lord, and wait patiently for Him. Your wisest course is to do as
Moses did at the Red Sea, “Stand still and see the salvation of God.” For if you
give way to fear when you hear of bad news, you will be unable to meet the
trouble with that calm composure which nerves for duty, and sustains under
adversity. How can you glorify God if you play the coward? Saints have often
sung God’s high praises in the fires, but will your doubting and hopelessness,
as if you had no one to help you, magnify the Most High? Then take
courage, and relying in sure confidence upon the faithfulness of your covenant
God, “do not let your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid.”
--Charles Spurgeon