What is it like to be gay?

In an ideal society, being gay would be no different from being straight. However, the great prejudice some heterosexuals hold against homosexuals inhibits them to be different. They want to feel accepted by at least a small part of the world, so they are sucked into the �gay subculture.� This small group of homosexuals leads a life of promiscuity, clubbing, alcoholism, and illegal substance abuse. It attracts lonely gay teens because only one thing they have in common: they were both cast away by their parents and friends, and denounced as not being equal by the government and religion. They would normally lead totally different lifestyles were it not for the prejudice that pulls them together.

Being pulled into this subculture of acceptance usually drastically changes the ethics and morality with which many people have been raised. The teen is now accepted for being gay, but must go against his original morals to fit in, thus continuing the state of depression.

It is one thing to admit that you are gay. It is very different trying to figure out how that characteristic fits in with the rest of your lifestyle. To be gay, you do not need to have weak wrists, a high-pitched voice, and a lisp, smoke, drink, use drugs or be promiscuous. The only thing that qualifies you to be gay is an attraction to someone of the same sex. You can still be religious, live in a committed relationship, go to college, be a jock, and be yourself; you do not have to �be gay.� That is just one small part of who you are, not an all-encompassing trait.

I, myself, started to be pulled into the sub-culture. I thought it was the only way I would ever be able to find others like myself. Since then, I have learned that many homosexuals lead �normal� lives, have mostly heterosexual friends, work in prestigious businesses and lead a life of their own. I was not disowned by my family, but I do not feel comfortable to be myself around them. When watching TV, I do not feel comfortable commenting on a hot guy like my sister often does, as I would get weird looks.

When I had braces, my dad went around telling everyone I had just gotten braces. I did not like the fact that he had to announce this to everyone. However, when I told him I was gay, he did not brag to anyone. It is barely mentioned in the house. The fact is known, but never discussed.

Being gay is not as much of my life as I have made it to sound. There is a lot more. I am an Eagle Scout; I hold the Vigil Honor in the Order of the Arrow and was Chief of my chapter this past year. I am President of my church youth group, a Sunday school teacher, and accompany the Cherub Choir. I am also the Youth Representative on the Southwestern Minnesota Synod of the Evangelical Lutheran Church of America. I have had ten years of piano lessons and played trumpet in the Crow River Area Youth Orchestra, High School Band, Pep Band, and Jazz Band. I was also in the school production of �Scrooge, The Musical,� the One Act Play based on the Holocaust, and participated in speech. In addition, I have a paper route and work as a cashier at a large retail store.

Being gay is not the only thing in my life, but has contributed to some large problems with depression, as I did not see being gay could fit in with the rest of my life. I now know that I can still be involved with everything I was and still be gay at the same time. I am the same person I was before, but with the addition of a very caring boyfriend.