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Can't waste Viagra
This man got his prescription for Viagra, and goes home to get ready
for when his wife gets home. He calls her on the phone, and says, "I'll be home
in an hour." "Perfect," she replies. The man thinks her agreement is because the
Doctor told him to take his Viagra an hour before. He takes the Viagra and
waits. Well, and hour goes by, the man is ready to go, but no wife? She calls
him on the phone and she says, "Traffic is terrible. I won't be there for about
an hour and a half." The man, frustrated, calls his Doctor for advice. "What
should I do?" he asks. The Doctor replied, "It would be a shame to waste it. Do
you have a housekeeper around?"
"Yes" the man replied.
"Well, maybe you can occupy yourself with her instead?" said the Doctor. The man
then replied with dismay, "But I don't need Viagra with the housekeeper..."
Carelessly administered
The wife of an older man is distraught because her husband's 'little
soldier' can't salute anymore. She goes to her local doctor and explains the
situation and the doctor just feels plain bad for her. The doctor thinks for a
little bit, turns to the woman and says, "Listen, I don't do this for everyone,
but since your husband's on his way out... Get this prescription, and put three
drops in his milk before he goes to bed." The wife is very happy and thanks the
doctor profusely. Two weeks later, the doctor sees the woman and asks how it
went. The lady blushes, smiles and says, "well I put thirty drops in his milk by
accident, and well, we just need an antidote now to close the coffin."
Viagra and iron supplements
Men taking iron supplements are warned that taking Viagra may cause
them to spin around and point north.
Expensive Viagra
A man at the pharmacy to pick up his Viagra prescription exclaimed
over the $10 per pill price. His wife, who was with him, had a different
opinion: "Oh, $40 a year isn't too bad."
Viagra eyedrops
Scientists have released a new form of Viagra, it comes in an eyedrop
form and makes you look well hard.
Clinical term
What's the clinical term for men who need Viagra?
Myccoxafailure.
Honeymoon location
Have you heard where many seniors are opting to spend their second or
even third honeymoons?
Viagra Falls.
Keep the old men in bed
How do the nursing homes keep the old men in bed?
Give them Viagra.
Kid who took Viagra
Did you hear about the 13 year old kid who took three Viagra pills?
They had to rush him to the hospital because he had 3rd degree burns on his
hand.
New name for Viagra
In 2005 Viagra will be under a new technical name; please ask your
pharmacist for 'mycoxaflopen'
Overdose on Viagra
If a man overdoses on Viagra, how do they get the casket lid shut?
Snake on Viagra
What do you call a snake on Viagra?
Rod!
Stolen Viagra
Following the approval of Viagra by the UK's health authorities, the
first shipment arrived yesterday at Heathrow airport, but was hijacked on the
way to the pharmacy distribution warehouse.
Scotland Yard has warned the public to be on the lookout for a gang of hardened
criminals.
Using Viagra for the first time
Last night I tried a Viagra for the first time. When I swallowed it,
it got stuck in my throat. This morning I awoke with a stiff neck!
Viagra and Allegra
Scientists have developed a new pill that will now help impotent men
who are also hay fever sufferers. By combining Allegra to take care of the
allergies, and Viagra for the impotency, it gives you an erection not to be
sneezed at!
Viagra and an ugly girl
Pigboy says, "I dated a girl so ugly, she's used as a antidote for
Viagra!"
Viagra and exotic dancers
Since the release of Viagra, exotic dancers now claim that they are
receiving a lot more standing ovations.
Viagra and iron supplements
Men taking iron supplements are warned that taking Viagra may cause
them to spin around and point north.
Viagra and Prozac
I take Viagra and Prozac together. If I can't get it up, I don't
care.
Viagra and Rogaine
What do you get when you cross Viagra with Rogaine? Don King.
Viagra Chapstik
Viagra Chapstik? One way to keep a "stiff upper lip!"
Viagra computer virus
Of course you've heard about the Viagra computer virus, it turns your
3 1/2 inch floppy into a hard disk.
Viagra eye drops
Heard about the new Viagra eye drops?
They Make you look hard.
Viagra guidelines
If the insurance companies are going to set guidelines before
approving Viagra coverage, what are they going to use?
A growth chart?
Viagra in the canal
Just heard that a UPS truck went into the Welland Ship Canal at Port
Colborne, Ontario. Among the other packages was one containing a few thousand
Viagra tablets. As the Viagra in the water went downstream, all the bridges went
up.
Viagra, medicine's version of...
Viagra, medicine's version of "MIRACLE-GRO."