| April 27, 2004 - My fantabulous birthday |
| Dear Friends, Saturday was my birthday and boy did I get my drink on! First off, a colleague of mine took me out for lunch on Friday for burgers and fries (with a teensy gin and tonic to wash it all down). The weather was wonderful for a change and I was tempted to sit outside on the patio except for the fact that the pollen count has been so high. Anyway, I wish you could have seen the necklace our waitress was wearing. It was shaped like those nude women silhouettes you see on the the mud-flaps of trucks! That was so totally unexpected, but it gave me something to titter over, because, as all of you know, I can't go out in public without seeing something strange or being accosted by booger-bearing, bum-pinching freaks. Of course, after work I went out again since that one gin and tonic at lunch just was not sufficient. To be honest with you though, it was all rather low key. I just stood around watching music videos and marveling that I still somehow managed to stay 29 and some months old. On Saturday, I got up bright and early and headed off to my Swedish class only to discover that we had a substitute teacher because the usual teacher had gone out of town to celebrate her own birthday, which was also on Saturday! Isn't that amazing? After school, I had to rush home, work out, and eat lunch in preparation for a little more partying. I toddled on into town where I ordered several vodka tonics and watched more videos. But these weren't music videos; they were more like excerpts from stage and film musicals. I guess it was OK, but I would much rather have seen real music videos. Anyhoo, after having had about 4 or 5 vodka tonics, I shambled over to an Italian restaurant to meet Pablo. The food was dee-lish, as it usually is at this restaurant, but I felt like I just couldn't drink another drop of alcohol! Quelle disappointment! It's a sure sign of growing older. So after din-din, I headed on home and got some sleep because I had to do Drunken Brunch Sunday the next day with my friend K. On Sunday I was up by 6 because those damned kitties were hungry and kept walking around the room and jumping on things. Gunhilda can be particularly annoying that early, because she makes a kind of grunting noise that sounds more like some Vietnamese pot-bellied pig than a cat. Anyway, I forced myself to get up and feed them, then I washed clothes, and rode the stationary bike for what seemed like the lifespan of a Galapagos tortoise. And then finally, finally, I was able to start getting ready for Drunken Brunch Sunday. You'll remember, dear Friends, that I recently wrote about these neat pills called "Chasers" that stave off a hangover? Well, K. said I had to be certain to bring enough for us so that we'd feel OK Monday morning. So I just emptied a whole bottle of them into a little sandwich bag and put them in the pocket of my jeans jacket. Brunch was really good as it always is at the Happy Heifer. And luckily, Mr. Licky-Fingers wasn't there, so we didn't have to put up with that. And we only talked about silly stuff in order to appear more shallow than we really are. At one point though we did get a bit scientific, because I pointed out that the only way I can remain 29 and some months has to be through the application of some facet of Einstein's theory of relativity. K. agreed and said that when I get older, I should be shot into outerspace at several times the speed of light, so that when I return to earth, everyone would be dead, but I would have turned back the hands of time for myself! A truly clever idea! Though I have to admit that I wonder if that "shooting into space" idea is just a not-so-subtle way of getting rid of me. So after we left the Happy Heifer, we went off to another place for more drinkies. We chatted at this new place with some people I knew and then we headed to yet another place. That's when disaster struck, dear Friends. We had just arrived at the front door of the next bar, when K. screamed out, "The 'Chasers' JOHNNYLEEN! The 'Chasers'!" Because I had been carrying my jacket instead of wearing it, the sandwich bag of Chasers fell out and those precious beauties were scattered all over the sidewalk! K. dropped to his knees and started scrounging around trying to gather them all up while yelling, "We've got to save them! We can't let 'em go to waste!" It was like a bizarre re-enactment of "Valley of the Dolls"! And, of course, I got caught up in the excitement myself and started crawling around on all fours trying to rescue my "dolls". People were walking by and I can only imagine what in the world they thought. Oh my God! I just realized that we were acting like the kinds of freaks I'm always making fun of! Next entry Previous entry Go to diary entries Go back home |