| March 7, 2003 - A new game and a new character |
| Dear Friends, what should I tell you about first? The new game I made up or the new character I saw at Ye Olde Watering Hole last night? I think I'll tell you about the game first so that you can start playing it right away if you wish. You'll remember that some time ago I spoke about singing current pop songs the way Ethel Merman would. A few days ago at Ye Olde Watering Hole, my friend Harold was singing some song full of obscenities by some heavy metal band when he decided it would be fun to sing it like Ethel Merman. It really was quite funny, although Ethel probably used such words sparingly and only when she felt that her status as a star was being compromised. So that led me to think that I should make up my own song game. Now back in the 50's there was a song recorded by Eddie Howard and Rosemary Clooney, separately, not together. If you don't know who they were, you'll have to look them up. The name of the song was "Count Your Blessings" and the first verse went like this: When I'm worried and I can't sleep, I count my blessings instead of sheep. And I fall asleep counting my blessings. You might want to see if you can find a soundbyte of the song somewhere otherwise you'll have to recite it like a poem when you play my game. Now here's the game. Think of a word that you can put in place of "blessings" and just keep going until the song is sillier and sillier. Alcohol helps it along, believe me. Now my favorite word for this is "bosoms" because I think the word sounds funny just by itself. So my new song is: When I'm worried and I can't sleep, I count my bosoms instead of sheep. And I fall asleep counting my bosoms. Other fun words are "nipples", "hickeys", and "lesions"! Try it at your next drinking party! Now for the weird character at Ye Olde Watering Hole. We're all just sitting there when this guy comes in and orders a glass of Coca Cola with plenty of ice. He then proceeds to scoop the ice out of the glass, wrap it in a napkin, and then press it to his nose, all the while muttering unintelligibly to himself. He kept on asking for more ice and kept rocking back and forth while holding ice to his nose. Finally, Brad the owner came over and asked the bartender, Jason, what was wrong with the guy. So Jason asked the man if he was OK and the guy answered yes, that he had hit his nose and was using ice to keep the swelling down. After a while he got up and left and Jason told us he had seen the guy earlier in the front of the restaurant eating an ice cream sandwich. JOHNNYLEEN asked if he had pressed the ice cream sandwich against his nose, but apparently he hadn't. Later on, I had to tinkle, so on the way to the unisex bathroom there, I noticed that the guy had come back in and was eating a small container of ice cream. It was all very strange. First of all I hadn't noticed that his nose looked swollen at all. Secondly, his steady diet of ice cream in freezing weather struck me as peculiar. But then, that's Ye Olde Watering Hole...always providing fodder for my fantabulous on-line diary! Next entry Previous entry Go to diary entries Go back home |