I'll settle for you, chapter 4.

Zoicyte aka Johnnyjosh

Warnings; Language, Yaoi, lemon.

Notes; Weirdness, insanity, humor (at least I think some of it's funny, anyway), some MAJOR OOC, WAFFY, sap and silliness in places, AU, THIS IS BASED ON THE ANIME. I guess this takes place when Bra is like, 16, Goten and Trunks are like, 27 and 28 respectively, and Pan is about 14. You'll have to excuse me if I make a few mistakes with plot and characters, I've only seen DBZ up until the cell saga.

Rating; NC-17.

Pairing; Piccolo + Vegeta.

Description; Vegeta and Piccolo try to deal with the little bundle of joy on the way.

Disclaimer; Don't own 'em, not makin' any money.

Notes; Thanks to Lara, extra special thanks to Jari S for the help with my questions, and all the pple that have threatened me with sporks and various other creative torture devices.

"Denotes speaking"

*Denotes thoughts*


Vegeta and Piccolo touched down in the front yard, relieved and ready to handle the impending baby shower.

"Let's go grab a shower and hey! Mmmphh..." Vegeta's sentence was cut off as Piccolo grabbed the startled Saiyan and pulled him up against his chest, claiming his lips in a searing kiss.

"We can have a shower together, after we have a little quality time alone." Piccolo purred, breaking the kiss as he began to make his way to the front door.

Vegeta shivered at the intensity of his lover's gaze, his body responding to the Namek's sudden aggressiveness. His pants started to feel a little too tight as Piccolo's large hands cupped his rear, pulling Vegeta tight against his body.

"Piccolo, we've got to get ready, Bulma is going to be here with Juuhachi-gou to set up the food and arrange the furniture." Vegeta said, wriggling in Piccolo's arms.

Piccolo opened the door and strode into the house, kicking the door shut behind him as he walked down the hall toward the bedroom. "They said they wouldn't get here until ten thirty," he turned to look at the clock in the living room. "That gives us two hours, if we leave ourselves an hour to clean this place up a bit and take a shower. I can do a hell of a lot to you in two hours koi..." Piccolo leered.

Vegeta's eyes widened as he was dropped on the bed. He scrambled to get out of the way as Piccolo nearly dropped on top of him, seeking to pin the slight Saiyan under his considerable bulk. "Wha..? Hold it!" He bellowed. "Who says you're on top? Bulma said we could probably have intercourse with you on the bottom safely for at least another month!" Vegeta snapped, scooting off the edge of the bed.

Piccolo sighed, looking at Vegeta across the bed, obviously annoyed. "I suppose you're going to make me stay on the bottom all that time aren't you?" He asked, his eyes narrowing dangerously. "You're probably banking on the hope that I might not want sex after that point, and maybe not for quite a while after the baby's born. And you may be right. But know this, when my hormones get back under control, I will make you go uke just as many times as I do in the next month." Piccolo growled, before reaching across the bed and snagging the front of Vegeta's shirt with his long nails and pulling Vegeta to him once again.

Vegeta grunted as he splayed his hands against Piccolo's rock solid chest. "Easy!" he cried.

"Don't worry Vegeta, I know what I'm doing." Piccolo said quietly, laying Vegeta on the bed and straddling his slender hips. He leaned down and trailed kisses along Vegeta's throat, smiling as the Saiyan began to arch eagerly into his touch.

Vegeta reached up and grabbed the sides of Piccolo's face and pulled him up for a kiss, opening his mouth in silent invitation. An invitation Piccolo accepted immediately, plunging his tongue into Vegeta's mouth teasing and exploring.

*I don't think I could ever take this for granted.* Piccolo thought, enjoying his lover's unique taste, and marveling at his passionate responses. He ran his fingertips down the sides of Vegeta's throat, and began to try and undo the buttons on Vegeta's shirt. *The only complaint I have is what is it with him and these pink shirts?* He snarled as the buttons stubbornly resisted his repeated attempts to undo them, and ripped the shirt from his startled lover's body.

"Ahh! Piccolo! I like that shirt, or at least I did......" Vegeta trailed off, watching in distress as pieces of his shirt were thrown all over the room.

"Vegeta...." Piccolo murmured, trailing his tongue across Vegeta's chest, laving attention on each pebbled nipple. "You have 9 more shirts just like that one hanging in the closet."

"Yes......b...ahh...." Vegeta moaned as Piccolo's sharp canines grazed his stomach, raising goosebumps. His hands cupped the back of Piccolo's head as the Namek's tongue dipped into his navel, wrenching a soft gasp from him. Piccolo quickly undid Vegeta's jeans, pulling them down past Vegeta's hips. "Uhhh......Piccolo....." Vegeta groaned, as Piccolo's lips moved further down until his cheek brushed Vegeta's straining arousal. Vegeta raised his head, eyes hooded with desire as he watched Piccolo's lips brush the tip of his erection. His head dropped back and a loud moan escaped him as Piccolo's warm mouth engulfed his manhood, sliding down to the base in one slow, smooth stroke.

Piccolo moved his mouth up and down Vegeta's length teasingly, his body throbbing in response to the soft sounds coming from his lover. He raised his eyes to watch his lover as Vegeta began to writhe and pant softly. Piccolo reached down and cupped Vegeta's balls, massaging and caressing gently.

"Uhh..Piccolo......please.....nnn..." Vegeta moaned, trembling. He rocked his hips, attempting to coax Piccolo into moving faster. "More...Piccolo..please!" The Saiyan begged.

Piccolo chuckled quietly as he began to slide his tongue up and down the underside of Vegeta's arousal, swirling his tongue around the head, and back down. Vegeta snarled at being teased, drawing another grin from the Namek. "What's wrong Vegeta?" He purred.

"Stop it.......stop..." Vegeta rasped.

"Stop?" Piccolo asked, cocking his head to one side as he drew his mouth away from Vegeta's manhood. He sat up on his knees and moved forward until he was looming over Vegeta, his large hands braced on the bed far above Vegeta's head. "I don't really want to stop, but if you insist." he heaved a loud, disappointed sigh and moved away from Vegeta.

Vegeta froze, his eyes widening as his lover moved away from him. "Shimatta!! Piccolo! Get back here RIGHT NOW!!" He hollered, seizing Piccolo by the shoulders and pushing him down onto his back. He quickly scrambled onto his large lover, sitting on Piccolo's chest and leaning down to claim the Namek's lips in a heated kiss, both of them opening their mouths to each other to touch their tongues together teasingly, before they began to duel for supremacy.

Piccolo growled softly, reaching up to splay his hands across Vegeta's taut stomach. *I wonder......* Piccolo thought to himself, before spreading a hand around each side of the smaller Saiyan's waist. His eyes snapped open and he gasped softly when his fingertips and thumbs met. *Wow, I can wrap my hands right around his waist!* Piccolo thought, amazed. It made a wave of protectiveness wash over him, maybe even a little possessiveness. *He's mine, whether he admits it or not, he wouldn't be here if he didn't feel something for me. It's not just an obligation to the baby that made him want to set up house.* Piccolo smiled against Vegeta's lips before shifting quickly and pinning Vegeta below him. "I can't wait anymore." he said softly, using his long, sharp clawlike nails to shred Vegeta's jeans, sending scraps of denim all over the bedroom, using infinite care to just rip the jeans, and not catch Vegeta's skin. Piccolo leered down at Vegeta as he looked up into Piccolo's eyes, a little startled by the violence of Piccolo's actions, but Piccolo could see the underlying excitement in the depths of Vegeta's eyes.

Vegeta shifted restlessly as Piccolo tore away his own garments, the purple and blue material joining the denim and pink scraps of shirt that littered the floor. "Piccolo...." Vegeta groaned, his hands clutching the sheets tightly.

"Right here Vegeta." Piccolo whispered, straddling Vegeta's waist once again, bracing his arms on either side of Vegeta's head as he leaned down to capture his lover's lips in an exquisitely gentle kiss. He shifted his hips until Vegeta's erection brushed against his entrance, drawing a quiet moan from the Saiyan, and thrust down.

Vegeta shouted against his lover's mouth as his length was plunged into Piccolo's hot, slick passage, the smooth flesh caressing him as Piccolo's internal muscles gripped him tightly. Vegeta shuddered violently, his hands shooting up to grip Piccolo's thick forearms as his hips pushed up toward his lover eagerly. He groaned as Piccolo began to move up and down slowly on his straining arousal. "P...Piccolo.....ahh...more.." he moaned, his head shaking from side to side. "I need you."

Piccolo froze for a moment as Vegeta's words sunk in. In the few months they'd been together, Vegeta had never once used that particular phrase. "I need you too." He said softly, kissing his lover tenderly as he moved his hips again. He raised himself slowly until just the head of Vegeta's cock was inside him, then thrust down quickly. Piccolo found his rhythm, moving up and down fast enough to keep Vegeta writhing and moaning beneath him, but not fast enough to bring either of them to climax.

Vegeta whimpered, shouted, pleaded, begged, threatened and cajoled, anything he could think of to coax Piccolo into moving faster, but the sadistic Namek would not be swayed. He kept up his steady pace of slowly pulling up, then plunging down on Vegeta's cock for what seemed like hours until the frustrated Saiyan was snarling, thrashing and growling beneath him.

"What do you want Vegeta?" Piccolo asked softly, moaning as he thrust down again.

"You...." Vegeta growled.

"Yeah? What do you want from me?" He panted.

"I....I want to fuck you..." Vegeta ground out.

"Mmm....I like it when you talk dirty Vegeta." Piccolo grinned ferally at him, before rolling Vegeta on top of him. "Do it." he growled.

Vegeta's eyes widened, then narrowed to glittering slits as he rose to his knees between Piccolo's parted thighs. "You asked for it." Vegeta purred as he pulled himself almost all the way out of Piccolo's body and then paused.

"What are you waiting for?" Piccolo hissed.

"Look at me." Vegeta said quietly. Piccolo raised his head and complied. "I want to watch you. I want to see your eyes." Piccolo grabbed the pillows and put them under his head, locking eyes with Vegeta.

Vegeta rammed his length into Piccolo and froze as his lover cried out. "Did I hurt you?" he asked worriedly.

"No! Keep going!" Piccolo cried.

"Piccolo...I..I don't think I should..." Vegeta said uncertainly.

"VEGETA!!! JUST FUCK ME!!" Piccolo shouted bucking his hips for emphasis.

"FINE!" Vegeta shouted back. "IF THAT'S THE WAY YOU WANT IT, THEN TAKE THIS!!"

Both of them grunted as Vegeta began slamming himself into Piccolo. The bed creaked and groaned under the force of Vegeta's thrusts, and the headboard smacked loudly against the wall. Piccolo had to fight to keep his eyes open and locked on Vegeta's as the pleasure threatened to overwhelm him. Vegeta stared into Piccolo's eyes with ferocious intensity. Piccolo gasped as he stared into Vegeta's obsidian eyes and saw all of Vegeta's passion, all his emotions laid bare as Vegeta thrust into him. The two of them bucked and arched against each other, moaning and panting, never breaking eye contact.

Piccolo reached up to grasp Vegeta's shoulders tightly as he felt his climax fast approaching, and he felt the growing sense of urgency radiating from Vegeta. He tried to let his own emotions show in his eyes as his orgasm hit, wrenching a scream from him.

Vegeta whimpered softly, staring into Piccolo's half closed eyes as he screamed and buried himself inside Piccolo one last time, his seed shooting into his lover's body. He gasped for breath as he tried to roll off Piccolo, but the Namek would have none of it, he grabbed Vegeta's arms and pulled the Saiyan onto his chest. Vegeta spread his legs and let them dangle off Piccolo's sides as he relaxed against his lover.

Both of them jumped and cried out in surprise as loud clapping filled the room "Very nice. That was quite a show you two." A calm female voice said from the doorway.

Piccolo growled softly as he reached down to grasp the sheet, pulling it up until it covered Vegeta's rear. "What the fuck do you think your doing?" He growled looking at the tall, blonde cyborg who leaned against the doorframe.

"Just enjoying the show. I couldn't believe it when Krillin said we were invited to this baby shower, but now I definitely believe. You two are obviously not going to have any problems in the bedroom." Juuhachigou smirked.

"I thought you onnas weren't going to show up until ten thirty." Vegeta mumbled, yawning almost kittenishly. Piccolo looked down at him in surprise wondering why he didn't seem the least bit concerned that they had been performing for an audience.

The jinzoningen tilted her head, wondering how someone as caustic as Vegeta could look so adorable sometimes. Piccolo caught her train of thought, and snarled at her. "Whoa there big fella." She purred. "I don't want your boyfriend, I have my own man, so put away the fangs. For your information Vegeta, it's ten forty five."

"WHAT!" Vegeta yelped, sitting up on Piccolo's chest and staring at her. "Where's Bulma?"

"She ran out of the house right around the time Piccolo yelled just fuck me." She said, her face blank. "It was really interesting. Her face went five shades of pink, and four shades of red before she made it to the door." Piccolo glared at her, and Vegeta clamped his hands over his mouth to stifle his giggles, albeit unsuccessfully. Both the jinzoningen and the Namek stared at him in surprise, which only made him laugh more. Finally he pulled his hands away and threw his head back, laughing out loud.

"Whatever." Juuhachigou said, turning and walking down the hall with a dismissive wave.

"Kuso!!" Piccolo shouted, jumping off the bed with Vegeta cradled in his arms. "Let's get that shower and get this mess cleaned up!" He carried Vegeta into the bathroom and slammed the door.

Half an hour later, the clean and freshly dress couple finished picking up the scraps of cloth off the bedroom floor. They entered the living room to find all the chairs set in a circle, with a huge buffet set up along one wall.

"Do we need that much food?" Piccolo gaped.

"Absolutely." Bulma said, trying not to blush when she looked at them. "Remember, Goku, Gohan Goten, Trunks and Vegeta are going to be here. I've got the caterers on call. If we run out, we can fill this table at least two more times within twenty minutes." She set the last of the plastic cups out on another table piled high with disposable dishes. "I figured this was the easiest, no dishes to wash." Bulma grinned.

"Good point." Vegeta smirked. "So how much time do we have?" He asked, turning to see the clock.

"The early guests won't arrive until about quarter to twelve." Juuhachigou said. "Krillin and Marron will probably get here first, and your son and daughter Vegeta. Gohan will probably show up early as well. I don't know whether to wish Chi-Chi and Videl come, or stay away. I kind of like the idea of playing bouncer." The jinzoningen said with a dangerous gleam in her ice blue eyes. " The rest will probably arrive right on time. But...Goku and Goten couldn't be on time for their own funeral." She said, earning a chuckle from everyone in the room.

Juuhachigou was wrong, it was actually Yamcha and Puar who showed up first, Puar greeting Bulma with a hug, and Yamcha reaching up to clap a hand on Piccolo's shoulder and offer congratulations. He presented his gift to Vegeta, and laid a hand on his shoulder tentatively as well.

Vegeta looked at Yamcha calmly for a moment. "I know since Bulma and I stopped being romantically involved, you and she have been toying with the idea of resuming your relationship. I wish you all the best." He shocked everyone in the room by wrapping an arm around Yamcha and giving his shoulders a squeeze. "Oh and Yamcha..." Vegeta said as the human tried to inconspicuously make his way to the buffet table. "Don't screw it up this time, and wait until some of the other guests get here before you start digging through the food." Yamcha blushed furiously, not sure which comment he was more embarrassed about. Bulma laughed, blushing as well. She hadn't thought Vegeta would take it nearly this well.

Five minutes later, Korin and Yajirobe arrived, bearing two presents, a brightly wrapped and a small bag of senzu beans. "Just in case." Korin said. "I hear labor and delivery can be pretty rough."

"Thanks Korin." Piccolo smiled and rested a hand on his longtime friend's shoulder.

Next to arrive were Tien, Chiaoutzu, and Lunch. Bulma and Yamcha's eyes widened as they saw Lunch on Tien's arm, both of them dressed semi-formal. Tien had a light suit of pale green, with a white dress shirt with a button down collar. Lunch had a pale pink dress on, the two colors contrasting beautifully.

"Umm, hey Tien, hey Lunch!" Yamcha called, warily staying on the other side of the room. Vegeta eyed him strangely, wondering where the sudden tension was coming from. Piccolo stood still beside Vegeta. He wondered how he was going to be able to put up with Videl, Chi-Chi, and Lunch. *Shit! This is just what I need!* He went and sat down in one of the chairs, Vegeta coming to see if he was alright. He patted the seat beside him, and began explaining Lunch to Vegeta.

Tien proudly stood beside Lunch, who was telling Bulma and Yamcha about the new therapist she'd found, who had helped her to integrate Blonde and Brunette into one whole personality, and learn to manage her anger.

Krillin and Marron arrived next, with Master Roshi and Oolong in the car with them. Four more presents were added to the rapidly growing pile in one corner of the room, making Bulma smile.

Trunks and Bra finally made it, their excuse being that Bra had to wait in line for their presents to be wrapped at the mall.

Next were Videl, Pan and Mr. Satan. Mr. Satan struggled with a large package, brightly wrapped with multicolored foil paper. Krillin immediately ran over to take the package before anyone got hurt, namely Mr. Satan. Pan immediately ran over to Bra and Marron, all three girls giggling and whispering conspiratorially.

Gohan, Goten the Ox King and Chi-Chi arrived next, carrying two large packages, and two smaller ones. Chi-Chi didn't look to happy, and Gohan didn't either as soon as he got a look at his ex. He wisely decided to go and sit near Piccolo and Vegeta, as it seemed most of the guys had decided to stay on that side of the room. Chi-Chi and Videl sat together, the bond between the two women since their divorces was strong, and obvious to everyone. Goten immediately raced across the room to plop down in the chair beside Trunks.

The next person to arrive shocked everyone. Juunanigou strode calmly into the living room, placing a present in the corner with the others, and taking a seat in the corner. He glanced around the room casually, getting up gracefully as his sister came over to give him a hug. "Congratulations Piccolo, Vegeta." he said quietly. Piccolo and Vegeta nodded, reaching out to shake his hand.

As usual, Goku was the last to arrive. He struggled up the steps, trying to see around the massive package in his arms. Piccolo and Vegeta raced to the door to help him maneuver the cumbersome present into the house. "Hey! Looks like the gang's all here!" He grinned. "This is great! Wow! Look at all the food!" He said, drooling slightly. Everyone immediately raced to the table, grabbing plates and piling them with food before Goku ate it all. Bulma got on the phone to the caterers, deciding to have them bring out all the food at once. They informed her that the air van had been loaded for the last hour, and was on it's way immediately.

Juunanigou walked over to the entertainment center, putting on a CD, and turning to volume down low enough that the music would provide some soothing background noise. Juuhachigou sat beside her husband and daughter, patting an empty seat beside her. The jinzoningen came and sat beside his sister, smiling almost shyly.

"O.K. everybody," Bulma began, "the caterers are bringing the rest of the food in about fifteen minutes, so don't worry about running out, and when you're done, Piccolo can open his presents." She beamed. "Oh Piccolo, can I see you for a minute?" She asked, leading him down the hallway to the guest bedroom. She jumped when she turned around and found Vegeta behind her instead of Piccolo.

"Go eat Vegeta, don't worry about him, alright?" Bulma asked.

"No, I want to know what's going on." Vegeta crossed his arms and stayed where he was.

"Well, I was just going to give Piccolo my present, which is this." She clicked a capsule and dropped it in the middle of the floor. When the smoke cleared, a large machine almost to Piccolo's waist stood there.

"Alright, now. From what Dende told me about Nameks just drinking water, I assumed that you absorb your vitamins, nutrients and protein from it. So, after analyzing the blood and tissue samples I've taken from you so far, I proved that theory. Now, that's been fine up until now. But you have a baby inside you, a Saiyan baby at that. So you're going to need more nutrition. I've cross referenced your nutritional needs with Vegeta's, and set the machine to infuse the required nutrients and protein into the water for you." She went out to the kitchen, and filled a large pitcher with water. "You just put water in here," She poured the water in a hole at the top, "press this button," she pushed a green button on the side of the machine. The machine hummed to life, "and voila!" She held the pitcher under of a spout on the front of the machine, pushed a blue button just above the spout, and water poured forth. "Here, taste this!" Bulma poured some water into a glass and handed it to Piccolo.

"Hmm, it's fine." Piccolo said after trying it. "Thank you." He squeezed her shoulder gently.

"Hey, no problem. I was worried about the baby getting it's proper nutrients when I remembered what Dende told me about Namek eating habits, or lack of, all those years ago on the old planet Namek when I first met him." I had to ask when we were on the lookout." She smiled proudly and walked out of the room.

"So." Vegeta said, wrapping his arms around Piccolo's waist. "We should rejoin the party I suppose."

"And you should get something to eat before Goku and his two eat it all." Piccolo smirked.

"Definitely!" Vegeta said, quickly disappearing down the hallway. Piccolo chuckled quietly, then grabbed the water pitcher and followed Vegeta.

As Piccolo maneuvered his large frame in between chairs and mingling guests to take his seat beside Vegeta, he froze. Goku was standing in the corner of the room, unnoticed by anyone save Piccolo. He gazed longingly at Vegeta, not even bothering to eat the huge plate of food that sat on the counter in front of him. Piccolo's gaze shifted to Vegeta, who was busily stuffing his face, seemingly unaware of the other Saiyan's gaze. Vegeta's eyes snapped up to meet Piccolo's and he nodded his head toward the chair beside him, motioning with a large chicken leg for Piccolo to join him. Piccolo made his way across the room, trying to keep his eyes away from Goku. He couldn't help himself. As he sat down beside Vegeta, setting his water pitcher on the coffee table in front of him, he glanced up to see Goku turn away, dragging a hand down his face. *Shit shit shit!!* Piccolo thought frantically. *Great, now Goku decides he has feelings for Vegeta!* He didn't notice Vegeta's assessing gaze.

"Piccolo." Vegeta said quietly, lifting the Namek's arm and draping it over his shoulders. "I know Kakarott was staring at me. It doesn't matter. This relationship is no longer about being with you because I couldn't have Kakarott. You're the one I want to be with now. Ai shiteru Piccolo." Vegeta whispered, pulling Piccolo down for a gentle kiss.

Piccolo closed his eyes to hide the tears that suddenly threatened to overflow, "V....Vegeta.." he whispered, before jumping out of his chair and running to the bedroom, slamming the door behind him.

The room fell into a stunned silence, everyone turning to Vegeta for an explanation. Vegeta sat in his chair, staring after Piccolo, shocked.

"Vegeta!" Bulma cried, exasperated. Juuhachigou stood up and reached over, pulling Vegeta to his feet. "DON'T JUST STAND THERE, GO TALK TO HIM!!" They yelled in unison.

Vegeta bolted out of the living room. He flung open the bedroom door, his face drawn with worry. Piccolo lay on the bed, face buried in the pillows, shoulders shaking softly. "Piccolo!" He cried. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing....Gomen Vegeta...I.." Piccolo said, hiding his face in a pillow.

Vegeta shut the door and went to sit on the bed next to his lover. "Tell me." He pleaded softly.

"Nothings wrong, I just didn't want to burst into tears in front of all of them." Piccolo murmured.

"What....why? Did I do something wrong?" Vegeta asked, utterly confused.

Piccolo laughed and sat up, pulling Vegeta into his arms for a crushing bear hug. "Nothing's wrong Vegeta, but I just got the best present I ever could have asked for." He smiled and kissed Vegeta's forehead, holding the Saiyan on his lap as he rocked back and forth gently. "Ai shiteru Vegeta." Piccolo said softly.

Bulma stood outside the door listening, tears streaming down her face. Juuhachigou stood beside her, a suspicious sheen in her icy blue eyes as well.

TO BE CONTINUED............................................