THE TOP TEN WAYS TO REALLY IRRITATE A COP

1.

Upon being stopped for a nonmoving traffic violation, ask the cop why he or she isn't out catching drug dealers. Then, after the cop finds the smoldering marijuana joint in your ash tray, ask the cop why he or she isn't out doing something about all the speeders on the highway.

2.

Upon being arrested for a violation, start telling the cop the limitations of his/her authority even though the evidence is in plain view.

3.

Upon a traffic stop, tell the vertically challenged (a/k/a "short") Officer: "Gee, I thought there was some rule about a person's height before they could become a cop. Are you really a cop?"

4.

After giving the third false name and D.O.B. to an Officer, and once again, when the physicals don't match up, tell the Officer: "O.K., I'm not going to lie to you this time, my real name is..."

5.

Wait until the cop goes on dinner break and just when his/her food comes to the table, walk up and state: "I know you're on your break, and I really hate to bother you, but I have a legal question."

6.

After seeing that a cop is trying to pull you over (as indicated by flashing lights and sirens), drive into the Mall parking lot and search for the best parking spot while he/she follows, after all , you've got shopping to do anyway.

7.

While waiting to receive your copy of a ticket, point out several other vehicles that were going as fast or faster than you were. Then ask the officer why he/she isn't stopping them too.

8.

While an officer is investigating the crime scene of a burglary at your residence or business, pick up any evidence that the suspect may have left behind and ask the officer: "Do you think you can try and get some fingerprints off of this?"

9.

Wait until the cop finishes a long, hard shift and begins the drive home in his/her marked patrol car. Look in your rear view mirror and upon seeing the police vehicle, begin to drive five miles under the speed limit.

10.

Walk up to the crime scene tape at the convenience store where three marked patrol cars and a crime scene unit are parked and ask: "Is the store closed? I have exact change. Can I get a pack of cigarettes?"

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