Next stop...THE WORLD: They 2K1 Tour
The "2K1" tour will span the globe, and be the most important event of century. A complete around the world trip that will encompass excitement filled days, party filled nights, and a possible takeover of the world. The logistics of the journey will include 75 rolls of film (for documentation), 4 cases of shiney beads (for swindling the locals), and 54 kegs of beer (for consumption). The temporary itinerary is as follows:
From our home base in the City of Angels (Los Angeles), we will complete final planning of 2K1. We will be hoping for a big event down at the Staples Center, so we can join in the rioting and looting, to stock up on last minute supplies.
Then we're off! First stop will be Las Vegas. We will go to Las Vegas to win all the money that we'll need to fund the revolution aka trip. These 2 ladies have promised to give us insider tips on winning big in bingo. After we have won enough money (and filled up on buffets and free drinks), the journey will continue.
Although it is not tactically very important, if we take over The Alamo, it will be a symbolic victory, and draw attention to the fact that Psycho Tours and not just tourists, but touring for fun AND profit. In order to infiltrate the fort, we will sport coonskin caps and eat a lot of hard tack.
Next stop is Lousiana where we will stay at this old moonshiners hideout. This will be timed in conjunction with the celebrations of Fat Tuesday, so detection among the beaded drunkards will be difficult. And when the moment is right, we make the next move...
Cuba!!! Here we will befriend Fidel with talk of fine cigars and Hemingway, while getting him drunker than Captain Morgan on cheap rum. Then after a bit of top secret trickery, Cuba will be ours!
Then off to Tijuana, for a bit of Jai Alai and cerveza. This will fall in line with the celebrations of "spring break". A bit of R&R will be well appreciated after all the hard work of the coup d'etat. But back to work we will go...
A trek through Thailand to pick up some elephants and elephant trainers to lead the next leg of the battle (a la Hannibal, both the crazy guy who crossed the alps, and the leader of the A-Team)
Another stopover, this one in Australia, where we can pick up some didgiridoos (sp?) and fighting Kangaroos. We will also try and convince Steve Irwin to join us as a military consultant. (Our first pick was Paul Hogan, but apparently he was just an actor.
In Tibet, we will first free it from China, then take it back for ourselves. So all you people with thoses stupid stickers on your cars, don't get rid of them just yet. The only real reason for the take over is so we can conduct a full scale Yeti search.
Russia is next on the list. Here we will walk through the streets laughing at all the Russians who thought that Communism was a good idea. Hahahaha! While we are there, we have a lot of other tricks hidden in our big furry hats.
more is coming soon