The Top 20 Cool Things About a Car That Goes Faster Than The Speed of Light*

Sleep 'til noon and hit the golf course, and still get to work by 8:00 a.m.
Doppler shift makes red traffic lights look green.
Breaking the laws of physics is only a misdemeanor in most states.
Never in a car long enough to hear an entire Spice Girls song.
Carl Sagan and Stephen Hawking keep bugging you to carpool.
No one can see you pick your nose while you drive.
Lunch breaks in Paris, circa 1792.
Dublin to Las Vegas in 2 nanoseconds.
You can stop worrying about being sucked into a black hole while driving home from work.
You'll be so thin while driving it you can even wear horizontal stripes.
That deer in your headlights is actually behind you.
Traffic enforcement limited to cops with PhDs in quantum physics (which rules out most of them!).
Bugs never see you comin'.
You can travel in the fourth dimension: transcend of the limits of physical space!**
Can make a fortune delivering pizza with the slogan: "It's there before you order, or it's free!".
Car makes it from Hollywood to London fast enough to not arouse suspicions of Liz Hurley.
License plate: "Me=mc²"
Cigarette butts don't land in the back seat - they land in last week.
The more you drive, the younger you get.
Wait until Christmas Day, then go shopping in April!

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If anybody has 20 or more downers about a car
that goes fatser than the speed of light, please send them in!
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*: Neither the potential nor the effects of travelling this fast have actually ever been proven, so don't get your hopes up!
**: The existence of which has also never been proven, though Einstein suggested that the 4th Dimension was time.

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