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| DATE: APRIL 27, 2008 LOCATION: BANGKOK, THAILAND ATTENDENCE: 30,469 BETTING STRONG |
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THE
OPENING CREDITS ::: The show opens up with "For Each Name Remembered" by Beneath the Sky playing over some fast paced imagery of past wrestling cards the ANWF has tucked away in their extensive library and other slick and "edgy" crap that we throw in there to give people that feel good sensation in their gut. We then head down to the ringside area where we go to the American announcer's table, seated conveniently next to the Spanish and German announcer's table, and we see Joey Styles and Larry Sweeney ready to call this megashow! Joey
Styles: Joey looks over in shock. Joey
Styles: Larry
Sweeney: Larry is in midsentence, pointing at his sheened hair styling, when Joey just has to cut this off right away. Joey
Styles: Larry
Sweeney: Larry has to take a breath after that explosion and Styles can do nothing but nod and stare. Before they can get any further into discussion, "Come Out and Play" by The Offspring hits the speakers and these fans know exactly what is coming! Scott "Raven" Levy hits the ring in all of his leather and flannel clad glory with "The Colonel" himself Mike Sanders in tow! These two head into the ring and Raven takes his usual position in the corner, while Sanders stands in his nice three piece suit with a microphone, waiting for the fans to settle down with their foreign rambling. Mike
Sanders: The fans, um, boo? Mike
Sanders: The fans are growing rather impatient and are booing as Sanders hands the mic over to Raven. Scott
Levy: I was brought into ANWF to generate ratings and make sure things stay interesting. I am the president of this "illustrious" company for no other reason than that and I am not going to pretend like I'm here to make any friends, like I could if I tried anyway... and I'm not here to dance for you ignorant fools and pretend like I care about what you think of me. You people have one interest: violence. Well I'll give you violence. I'll give you all the combatative fetish fodder you could ever desire, and I'll give this promotion something no other company can lay claim to and that is a tested and TRUE champion that we can whore and profit from as a community. Quoth the Raven, nevermore. MATCH
ONE GillT vs. Alex Shelley As
the bell sounds, Shelley shows that there is an at least
ounce of integrity in his dark, cold soul, as he offers a
hand shake to the "Notorious M.V.P."... whom
reluctantly accepts, allowing Shelley to pull him in and
execute the dreaded headlock/noogie hybrid. GillT breaks
free and argues with the ref, in disbelief on how he
could allow such dirty, filthy maneuvers, all while
allowing another free shot for "The Next" as he
takes strikes Gill with a running knee to the gut.
Shelley stays on the offensive, dropping Gill with a
stunner and transitioning into a crossface variant
followed by a spank to the buttocks ... why? For good
measure, of course. Anyway, Gill immediately reaches the
ropes to break the homoerotic hold before he is scarred
for life. The ref tries to lure Shelley away, but Shelley
pushes him away and charges at the seemingly vulnerable
GillT ... whom, most likely on instinct, flips Shelley
over the top rope with a back body drop. However, Shelley
saves himself much error by landing on the apron and
subsequently raking Gill's eyes. Gill staggers, and
Shelley flips over with a sunset bomb ... and holds for
the pin. 1... 2... Gill kicks out. Shelley kicks Gill in
the back and screams some vulgarities at the referee,
giving Gill some recovery time ... but not enough as
Shelley resumes the assault, pulling Gill off the mat,
driving a few knees to the gut, and whipping him into the
ropes. Shelley tries to catch Gill with a dropkick off
the rebound, but kicks nothing but air instead as Gill
manages to stay out of harms way. Gill uses this as an
opportunity to get some offense in and charges at
Shelley, but gets caught with a practically out of
nowhere calf kick. Shelley covers. 1...2...and Gill gets
a shoulder up. WINNER: GILLT (PINFALL) MATCH
TWO Nick Gage vs. Kane w/ James Mitchell BOOOOOOOOMMMMM!!! Kane makes his mark out of an entrance with a bang, that organ music playing all eerie like. The lights are red, James Mitchell's suit is red, and Kane is red, so hopefully these fans out there waving their dollars and hounding down their bookies are going to see A LOT MORE FUCKING RED before this is all over. Nick Gage doesn't make quite as fancy an entrance, but he gets the fans excited nonetheless by storming in with a trashcan stuffed with painful looking object in one hand, a couple of lighttubes slung over his shoulder, and a pair of brass knuckles on each hand! Nick Gage came for a fucking fight, gentlemen, and with the tall order standing in front of him, he better be ready to get one! Gage tosses the trashcan into the ring and slides in with his lighttubes still in hand. Kane charges, looking for a big boot, but Gage smashes him right to the left side of his head with two lighttubes and that takes Kane by surprise. Kane then begins to get pummeled to ribcage and head with haymakers from Gage and his brass knuckles and James Mitchell shows genuine concern on the outside! James
Mitchell: The ref just waves him off and gets back to watching Kane get staggered with some kicks and more knux shots. James
Mitchell: Mitchell jumps up onto the apron and Gage turns his attention that way for a moment to talk some shit with Mitchell. Mitchell jumps down after being threatened with a knux shot of his own, but when Gage turns around he gets a clothesline for his troubles. Kane picks up the trashcan that Gage brought with him and smashes it over Gage's back, sending some of the contents flying from the container. Out comes a crutch wrapped in barbed wire and a stable gun! Kane grabs Gage and picks him up by the throat... CHOKESLAM ONTO THE TRASHCAN! But he's not done yet... Kane goes to the outside and Mitchell is pulling out a table for him to use in the ring. Kane slides the table into the ring and heads back inside, but Gage has already pretty much recovered and smacks Kane right over the head with the barbed wire crutch! Kane stumbles backwards into the corner and Gage charges in and smashes him again with the crutch! Gage hits a DDT on Kane out of the corner and attempts a cover, but as he tries to get the pinfall, Mitchell grabs the referee by the leg and pulls him out to the floor! Mitchell stomps the referee a few times and heads into ring with a BOX OF MATCHES AND A BOTTLE OF LIGHTER FLUID! Gage grabs Mitchell by the hair as he enters, but Mitchell low blows Gage and that sends him down. Mitchell slaps Kane across the face as he lays on the mat, and then a second later Kane sits right up and the two set up the table and douse it in the lighter fluid. Out from the back runs JUSTICE PAIN, though, as they aren't paying attetion. Kane turns his attention to Gage as Mitchell prepares and lights the table on fire. Into the ring storms Justice Pain, who kicks Mitchell and crushes him with the PAIN THRILLA! Kane turns his attention Pain, and Gage kicks Kane right in the sack for his troubles! The two brothers toss Kane off the ropes and hit A DOUBLE FLAPJACK THROUGH THE FLAMING TABLE! Pain rolls the referee back into the ring and Gage makes the cover for the winnig pinfall! WINNER: NICK GAGE (PINFALL) Joey
Styles: Larry
Sweeney: Joey
Styles: MATCH
THREE Rohan Malhotra vs. Homicide Why?
Tell me why these two men, both whom have guaranteed
spots in the main event would still insist on wrestling
each just for shits and giggles? This much I will never
know but who really gives a turd? MATCH
FOUR CM Punk vs. Eddie Kingston Kingston makes his entrance first and doesn't get a whole lot of fan fare. He's got a few high rollers in the audience behind his back, though, as a few wild shouts of encouragement come his way. I don't think he really gives a damn either way, though, as he's here to fight and make his mark on an industry that hasn't been all that kind to him in his relatively short career. Then the drums hit and the lights dim and the fans cheer in anticipation of their loverboy, CM Punk! "Miseria Cantare" is playing all loud like and Punk is just soaking up all of the attention and doing his "X" taunt and is really feeling it... right up until about the time Kingston attacks him on the ramp. Punk and Kingston trade some heavy handed blows, which Kingston gets the upper hand of and begins to choke Punk with his athletic jacket! Kingston drags Punk by the jacket for a few seconds, but Punk gets free and up to his feet and catches Kingston with a kick to the gut and sends him into the turnpost HARD. Punk rolls Kingston into the ring and the bell officially sounds. Punk uses his kicking arsenal to back Kingston in a corner, but as he charges in with a big knee strike, Kingston dodges it and gives him nothing but buckles for his trouble. Kingston runs off the ropes and Punk stumbles right into the LARIAT~! Kingston continues his attack by savagely pummeling Punk on the mat with his fists. Kingston rolls out of the ring and grabs a steel chair and then gets right back on the assault. He sends the chair into Punk's gut and then gives him a chair assisted jawjacker that sends Punk down and hurting on the mat. Kingston follows that up with a chinlock, trying to keep the pressure on the injured area, but Punk gets to the ropes and it's broken up. Kingston tries to take Punk down with some clubarm shots, but Punk elbows him a few times and nails a pretty gnarly palm strike to the jaw that gets Kingston rocking. Punk then gets Kingston up into a fireman's carry and drops him throat first over the top rope, cutting off Kingston's wind supply for a few needed seconds. Punk grabs the chair that was used to assault him earlier and sets it upright. Punk picks up Kingston off the mat and knees him in his rounded gut, before twisting him up and dropping him with a Devil's Lock DDT right onto the seat of the chair! Punk attempts the pinfall at this point, but Kingston does not succumb just yet. Punk tries to pick up Kingston, but catches some fingers to the eye sockets for his troubles. Kingston runs off the ropes and gives him some Yakuza kick action right to the back of the cranium! Punk staggers forward and bounces off the ropes and right into a BACKDROP DRIVER! Punk rolls to his knees, dazed, and Kingston sets up the chair momentarily and grabs him again... BACKDROP DRIVER ONTO THE CHAIR! Kingston attempts a pinfall this time, but gets a two and a half. Kingston picks up Punk and looks like he might be attempting a piledriver, but Punk drops a knee and gives him a low blow for his troubles. Punk grabs him by the arms butterfly and style... hoists him up... WELCOME TO CHICAGO, MUTHAFUCKAH! Kingston is holding his back in agony and Punk hurries to capitalize. Punk plants a knee right to Kingston's spine and begins to wrench back Camel Clutch style. Kingston fights the hold for about 8 seconds and finally reaches the ropes. Punk then seems to be looking for a vertical suplex, maybe, but Kingston blocks that and nails him with some punches to the gut and then tosses Punk to the outside through the ropes. Kingston hurries outside and begins to viciously kick Punk's head into the guardrail multiple times. Kingston picks up Punk and begins to deliver some RAPID KNIFE EDGED CHOPS! Punk is all lit up after that, but sends a knee into Kingston's gut and turns the tides, nailing multiple elbows to his jaw and then roundhouse kicks him right in the chest! Punk then hurries and jumps up onto the apron and slingshots himself upward and hits a sit-out moonsault to the outside onto, squashing Kingston into the floor! Punk and Kingston are both hurting after that move and the fans are applauding wildly. Punk hooks a leg to make a cover and Kingston just stays down on this one and lets the pinfall happen so he can get a breather. The ref begins to count to ten and only makes it to seven before Kingston decides to get back up and take the fight back to Punk. Kingston comes out swinging and catches Punk with a hard elbow to the temple. Kingston then winds up and hits a Roaring Elbow, which sends Punk down to the floor. Kingston picks up Punk off the floor and whips him into a rail about 15 feet away with a lot of force, and then runs and kicks his head right into the rail again! Kingston picks up Punk and grabs him, then Sambo Suplexs him onto the edge of the German announce table, tipping that table over and hurting Punk's back substantially! Kingston measures up Punk, who's crawling back to his feet, with a hungry look into his eye. Punk stumbles and Kingston does a back spin and connects with the Backfist to the Future! Punk collapses after that damn near knock out blow and Kingston makes the cover, this time getting a three count for himself! Once again, the referee makes the ten count, but Punk gets up at seven as well and tells Kingston to go to hell. Punk and Kingston exchange a few pretty brutal open hand slaps before Punk kicks Kingston once more and smashes him face first into the Spanish announcer's table. Punk walks over and grabs the ring bell and smacks Kingston right in the forehead with it and then jumps up onto the apron. Punk jumps off the apron and comes down HARD ON KINGSTON WITH THE BELL TO THE CHEST! Punk once again pins Kingston, but Kingston barely kicks out before three this time, trying to send Punk a message about his heart and intengrity. Punk grabs Kingston and pulls him up to the ring apron right him. Punk hooks Kingston's arms and seems to maybe be calling for a modified version of his Pepsi Plunge, but Kingston breaks his right arm free and grabs the middle rope. Punk unloads a few club blows, but Kingston grabs him and nails an OVER HEAD BELLY TO BELLY OF THE APRON! PUNK HITS FUCKING HARD! Kingston then goes to the crowd and grabs a bottle of wine from one of the high roller fans in attendence who has money on him, apparently, and calls for Punk to get the fuck up. Punk staggers up, holding his back in all kinds of pain, and gets his LIGHTS KNOCKED THE FUCK OUT BY THAT DAMN WINE BOTTLE! The fans are going insane after that shot, as Kingston pins and easily gets the three count. It's pretty much academic now, as Punk is barely even attempting to get up from the ten count here. Kingston has this all wrapped up and is going on to the main event, but in what condition? WINNER: EDDIE KINGSTON (KO) MATCH
FIVE Scott Vick vs. Hindustani The
seventh match in this rivalry. The battle zone is a well,
a common parking area to say the least, with a high
abundance of cars, trucks, vans, and tires. Hindustani
stands in the lot ins a somewhat stoic manner ... but
where's Vick? The rumbling of an engine can be heard in
the distance, and before Hindustani can even react, he is
hit in the legu-lar area by a highly accelerated station
wagon. The impact knocks 'Stani for a loop, as Scott Vick
exits the car and chokes him with a lead pipe in a very
ruthless manner. The Hindu Monster isn't going to give up
though...even with such a clever ruse. Stani uses his
massive strength to flip Vick off and onto the hood of
the aforementioned station wagon. WINNER: SCOTT VICK (PINFALL) MATCH
SIX Christian
Isis vs. Davi Araujo vs. Matt Marley vs. The most exotic match up to come down wrestling's pike in quite some time is about to get underway with all the fans standing in intrigue at the dangling ropes, scaffolding, and trampolines that sorround the ring. It's more like the set up for some off beat circus than a wrestling match, but in this circus there is absolutely no such thing as a safety net. This match starts off with some very high paced brawling, that sees some double teaming from Isis and Simons onto Yoshitsune, with Short Dawg and Xenon taking on one another, and Araujo and Marley trying to play it smart and pick their shots carefully. Isis and Simons send Yoshitsune out of the ring and to the floor, and Araujo runs and kicks both men in the head and send them flying to the floor! Araujo then runs and does a handstand on the top turnbuckle, twists and bounces off the middle turnbuckle and moonsaults onto all three men on the outside of the ring! Marley then follows up after a clothesline to Xenon with a slingshot splash to the outside onto all four men out there now. Xenon doesn't waste anytime using the dangling ropes from the ceiling, as he counters a whip attempt by jumping up on the top rope and catching a rope hanging from the ceiling and swings and catches Short Dawg with a hurricanrana! Short Dawg is up pretty quickly after that and sweeps out Xenon's legs with a quick kick and nails a Standing Shooting Star Press. Short Dawg then goes and begins to climb up the scaffolding as Xenon tries to recover. Xenon manages to recover and instead of climbing up after Short Dawg, runs a does a Tope con Hilo that smashes Matt Marley into the guardrail and clips Davi Araujo in the head with his boot. Yoshitsune begins to climb up the scaffolding and Short Dawg awaits the fight up top. Christian Isis and Michael Simos have taken a rougher path to things, fist fighting into the crowd a little bit. Simons shows his considerable mean streak by trying to snap isis' spine with a brutal chairshot, but Isis manages mule kick Simons in the gut and then runs and launches off the rail and hits a rotating Tornado DDT onto the floor! Xenon surprises Isis by jumping onto one of the trampolines and flying into the crowd and catching Isis with a hurracanrana on the floor! The fans are just going nuts for this truly nonstop action! Yoshitsune and Short Dawg are fighting up on top of the scaffold, exchanging right hands. Araujo is setting up a table in the middle of the ring after trying to decapitate Matt Marley with a Sao Paulo Strike. He grabs Marley and looks to be going for a Capture Suplex through the table, but off the top comes SHORT DAWG AND YOSHITSUNE SWIRLING THROUGH THE AIR! OH SHIT, THEY CRASHED THROUGH THE TABLE! DUDES IN THE TRUCK, WE NEED A REPLAY!!! On top of the scaffold Yoshitsune grabbed Short Dawg and they flew off the top sort of like a DOUBLE FLIP FLUX CAPACITOR! Araujo drops Marley when he felt the impact, and attempted to cover Short Dawg, but Kenn Xenon slid into the ring all slick like and broke up the pin attempt. Marley then attacked Xenon and threw him out of the ring once again. Marley then slingshots himself out of the ring and onto one of the trampolines and catches Xenon with a Pele kick variation that probably hurt him more than Xenon. Back in the ring, Araujo nails Yoshitsune with a vicious Cyclone Kick and is taunting like he thinks he's got the match won, but Christian Isis swings into the ring on one of these crazy hanging ropes and breaks up the pin attempt with a kick to Araujo's head. Short Dawg is stumbling up and tries to run at Isis, but Isis ducks and pulls the top rope down and sends Shorty flying from the ring. Araujo does a handstand and tries for a kicking combo, but Isis managed to duck and catch Araujo and use his momentum to deliver a very devastating "C.C.C."! Christian hooked the leg pretty much Fisherman's style and got the pinfall victory before Marley could make the save! WINNER: CHRISTIAN ISIS (PINFALL) Joey
Styles: Larry
Sweeney: Joey
Styles: Larry
Sweeney: Joey
Styles: MATCH
SEVEN Razor
vs. Rohan Malhotra vs. Blake Straker vs. Homicide vs. Everybody has packed into the top chamber and as soon as the last man gets up top, it becomes all out WAR! The fisteses are a-flyin' and the stompers are a-stompin' as everybodies getting bumrushed and going for the floor door. Homicide brought his own weapon with him to this fight and began to use a fork to gauge people and slither his way down to the second tier, but Justice Pain was right behind him. Homicide tries to hurry and slip out of the second tier and make a run for the door, but Pain smacks him in the back with a Singapore cain and that stops him pretty quickly in his tracks. Pain grabs a couple of trashcan lids and goes on the attack to Homicide's head. Blake Straker is the next one into the second tier and he kicks Pain right in the back of the head and sends him face first into the mesh. Straker begins to grind Pain's face grater style across the fence, but Chris Fallon and Razor make their way down and things get a lot more chaotic in the chamber of weapons! Razor is choking Fallon like a son of a bitch with a chain at this point, using a piece of what appears to be sandpaper to rake the skin right off of his God damned forehead! Rohan tries to choke out Straker with a Rear Naked Choke, but that's just not smart, as Straker rams him face first into the cage and then Homicide nails him with a backdrop into a trashcan attached to the cage! Vick and Kingston finally make their way down to the second tier once people start fighting over trying to get to the bottom tier. Vick finds a steel chair and tries to hit Kingston with it, but ends up clocking Justice Pain and sending him into the corner. Rohan side kicks the chair that Vick is holding and it smashes right into his face and he falls backwards right into Fallon and Kingston. Homicide is the first one working on getting down the ladder, but Straker has a hold of his shirt and is giving him a hard time about it. Homicide and Straker are standing on opposite sides of the ladder and punching each other back and forth, but the bigger Straker gets the upper hand and Homicide flies down to the mat pretty damn hard. Straker takes the opportunity and flies off the ladder with a FLYING ELBOW DROP RIGHT TO HOMICIDE'S HEART! Straker hurt himself pretty good on that landing, but the fans loved it. Rohan is the next one trying to get down and Razor right behind him after hitting everyone with his chain wrapped fist. Razor is trying to rock the ladder a little bit on his exit so that Rohan has to slow down a bit, but Razor also shows his great experience edge because he takes the opportunity to quickly take a pair of handcuffs he found up there and actually handcuffed the damn door shut! Vick, Kingston, Pain, and Fallon are trapped on the second tier at this point and the way things are going, they are pretty much shit out of luck. Rohan seemed to be trying to get out and get to the door, but Straker was back up by the time he got down and sent him off the apron and flying into the BARBED WIRE LACED CAGE WALL! Rohan's flesh rips pretty handily and everybody lets out a collective cringe/cheer in the audience. Straker and Razor then begin to fist fight and Razor actually gets the upper hand for a minute... Until Homicide takes the ladder and tips it to smash Razor in the back of the head and send him flying into Straker, who falls outside to the floor pretty damn hard. On the outside of the ring, Rohan is getting back up all bloody and is closest to the door, but Homicide hurries and runs and catches him with his infamous Tope con Hilo to smash Rohan right into the BARBED WIRE AGAIN! Homicide took a bad spill on that high risk move, however. Razor rolls to the outside and gets back in a scuffle with Straker, but this time he misses a poorly planned clothesline and Straker whips him into the turnpost, which sends him flying right into the barbed wire! Straker takes a small breather and then walks towards the exit door and the fans cheer as he seems to be perfectly poised to make his escape. Meanwhile up on the second tier, Kingston is still trying to kick in the door, while the others have resulted in just senseless brawling to occupy their time in purgatory. Straker gets to the door and is about to be let out when suddenly a man jumps the guardrail and SUPERKICKS THE REFEREE BEFORE HE CAN UNLOCK IT! WHO THE HEL- IT'S AJ CROSS! AJ CROSS IS IN THE BUILDING, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN! Straker just stares at Cross, as Cross smiles at Straker and flips him off. Cross keeps eyecontact as he just strolls backwards towards the lockerroom, knowing that the sinking feeling of defeat just washed over Straker very omenously... that's when Straker gets tackled by Rohan and sent right into the barbed wire! Rohan then gives Straker a couple of kicks to the chest and face before throwing him right into the turnpost. Rohan then continues his assualt by running a Koppou kicking Homicide as he begins to get his traction back. Rohan stomps Homicide quite a few times into the ground before ducking down and stalking Razor as he stumbles towards the exit door unknowingly. Razor gets to the door and grabs it and begins to shake wildly, wondering why the door will not open. Rohan then begins to run and jumps, kicking Razor right in the head and sending him smashing harder than ever into that razor sharp barbed wire! There is just blood all over the place at this point and Rohan is leanig up against the door and yelling at the referee to let him out. Finally, a second referee makes his way onto the scene and retrieves the key to unlock the door. He was being severely rushed, as Straker was showing a lot of heart and trying to pull himself towards the door on his hands and knees, but Rohan was the first one to get a limb outside of the cage and thus... WINNER AND FIRST TRIPLE CROWN CHAMPION: ROHAN MALHOTRA (ESCAPE) From the backstage area AJ Cross emerges once more and gives a small gold inspired clap to the new champion of ANWF, going back and forth between a staredown of Rohan and Straker before back peddaling out once more and the show coming to an end. |