| Totally Unique Ways to Make and Save Money. |
| You may wonder why this page is in grey and black when the rest of my page is red and yellow. Well, its because this is a serious page. This is how to save money. These ideas are totally unique, every single one of them I thought of myself. |
| 1. DO NOT brush your teeth before visiting your dentist. They will see your filthy teeth and guess what? They will give you a brand new tooth brush. It will be complementry and it won't cost you a cent. |
| 2. DO USE your scanner as a camera. If you are like me you own a scanner. Cameras cost lots of money. What a waste to spend all that money on a camera when you can use your scanner! simply hold your scanner in an upright position with your subject in front of the scanner. While a scanner is not quite as robust as a camera, it definatly saves you money to use it as a scanner. |
| 3. DO USE a shopping cart as your principal means of transportation. Shopping carts are wonderful. Sit down on top of a long hill and your speed will rival that of many sportscars. I must admit that this idea is not totally unique. I have seen many homeless... eh hem highclass citizens flying down the street on their way to panhand... eh hem work. Oh, I almost forgot. Shopping carts can be obtained free of charge at your local waste disposal station, which is sometimes called a dump when actually they are wonderful shopping centers where everything is free. |
| 4. Forget your lunch when you go to school. Leave a note for your mom telling her that you forgot your lunch. Tell her to phone the next person on the bus route they will feel sorry for you and make you a lunch. There you go! A free lunch. |
| 5. Buy a jug. Buy some paper cups. Fill the jug full of water. Sell the water at the end of your street to people who are thirsty. |
| 6. Find a box. Live in it. |
| 7. Convince the federal government to give more funding to universities. (This will be most effective if you are in University) |
| 8. Work for McDonalds, find out how they make their food. Make your own food the same way. (Now its likely that you will not eat this food so in order to get dispose of the food you will need to form a company which can compete with McDonalds. There you go! You have now started your own bussiness.) |
| 9. Eat Manna. (This might be difficult for people living in the 21st century but hey thats not my problem its just my idea.) |
| 10. Grow algae in your bathtub. Eat it. Algae grows rapidly and is totally free! What a food! |
| 11. Elliminate Carbon Dioxide from the atmosphere. The money saved on taxes caused by increased health which is caused by intake of carbonated beverages which causes visits to the Doctor is well worth it. (That made no sense. Next time I will not use run-on sentences.) (Oops I guess we probably need carbon dioxide for plants. This is not going to work.) |
| 12. Invest in stocks. Sell them to a Chimpanzee for more than they are worth. (I know thats not very nice but Chimpanzees love stocks and will pay anything for anyone who is willing to sell stocks to them. So really you are being a really nice guy.) |
| 13. Offer to swallow pills containing the active ingrediant of Raid as a medical experiment. This is worth $460 (American Dollars) (Believe it or not this is what several college students did in 1998) |
| 14. Buy a hamster. Ok so this probably won't save you money but by one anyway because they are really cool. |
| 15. Addvertise that you know how to make a million dollars and for $25 dollars you will tell anyone who wants to know. You don't have to actually know just say you do. This is probably illegal so you don't have to do it. But its an idea anyway. This is not unique I suppose because hundreds of people have scammed other people. What a dumb society. |
| 17. I know, I missed 16. You may wonder why. Well let me tell you that you can save a lot of money by missing 16. This is really tough to do. I tried skipping my 16th birthday by being born on a leap year but it just doesn't work. I still turned 16 and therefore I did not save money. So I decided to make up for it by skipping 16 on this webpage. So far I've saved $34.26. |
| 18. Chop a stick from an elm tree. Hide in a ditch on your nearest highway. Wait for a snake to come crawling by. Trip the snake. I don't know if you've heard about this not but snakes will pay you big money if you trip them. |
| 19. Go to some sort of camp. Enter in their treasure hunt. I don't know for sure but I bet the treasure is worth something. |
| 20. Believe it or not you could get a job. Some people have become millionaires by working. |
| 21. A better plan would be to get people to work for you. Then you would be called a boss and you would pay the workers for the work they did. Even more people have become rich by owning a business. |
| 22. DO NOT get married, DO NOT get a boyfriend or girlfriend and above all DO NOT get a car. These are the top three expenses of every single person. |
| 23. DO read this page everyday. It will increase your productivity by 87%. |