contented

DISCLAIMER: All hail Joss Whedon, UPN, the WB, FOX, Mutant Enemy and 20th Century Fox Film Corporation. Theirs, not mine.

We held hands as we walked through the streets of Sunnydale. �I haven�t been to the movies in ages,� I said to Tara. �It was always a good place to catch dinner unawares.� She gave me a weird look. �Right, you probably don�t want to hear about that,� I chided myself.

�You�ve lived a long time, you must have a lot of stories to tell,� she said. �If you can�t tell me about your past, you can�t be free to be yourself.�

�It doesn�t disgust you?� I asked, not sure I wanted to hear the answer.

She stopped and took both my hands in hers. �You�re a vampire,� she said forthrightly. �You need blood to survive. No one ever told you that there was another way, that you didn�t have to kill to feed.�

�I did like the killing,� I admitted. �It was part of the whole experience, part of the rush.�

�You�re a predator,� she said earnestly. �That is part of your character. But obviously not the whole of it.� I kissed her gently and we resumed our walk.

�If I had the chip out,� I explained, �I think that I would try to kill again. I thought that it wasn�t working, and I tried to eat someone.�

She paused for a minute and thought. �How did it make you feel? Did you get the same rush?�

I shook my head. �The high, the juice, it wasn�t there. It wasn�t about the blood, or the kill. It was more about being angry with Buffy, and angry at myself for being so whipped.�

�You�re not ruled by your instincts anymore,� she said. �Even if the chip fails, you�ll be different than before.�

�Things are different now. I have you.� I gently kissed her knuckles. �I know you couldn�t stay with a killer,� I said to her. �As long as I have you, I won�t hurt anyone, even if the Initiative comes knocking on my door with a big box of candy, an apology, and a really good brain surgeon.�

She laughed. �The Initiative-O-Gram.�

�We�re from the government,� I intoned, �and we�re here to help.�

We turned the corner onto Revello Drive. I stopped and looked at her. �How do you want to play this?� I asked.

�What do you mean?� she replied. She shivered slightly in the wind and I looped her long scarf around her neck.

�Do you want to keep this a secret? You don�t have to tell anyone about us if you don�t want to,� I said sincerely.

�I�m not ashamed of you,� she said earnestly. �And I don�t believe in lying to the people that I care about.�

�It will hurt Willow,� I said to her. �She thinks you�ll come back to her.�

A shadow crossed her face. �I don�t want to hurt her,� she said softly. �But she hurt me. What she did to me was wrong, and I�m not going to push what we have under the rug just to make her comfortable.�

�She is in recovery, and she�s having a hard time,� I said. �I�m just afraid that she might try a love spell or something if she knew.�

�I won�t lie,� she said adamantly. �If anyone asks directly, I won�t lie. And I don�t want you to lie either.�

I wrapped my arm around her shoulders and we continued to walk. �Whatever you want, love.�

Buffy�s house appeared down the block. I tugged Tara back into the bushes. �What are you doing?� she asked, as I put my hands under her jacket.

�I�m storing up for later,� I said as I caressed her breasts. �I�ll have to be a good boy all night long.� I moved my mouth to her jaw, and licked her. She moaned. �Oh, don�t make that noise, pet,� I said as I bit her ear. �You�ll be shagged upright in the shrubbery.� Her hand cupped me through my pants and she rubbed me firmly. �Apparently that�s what you want,� I said, as her mouth covered mine. She kissed me heatedly as her tongue probed my mouth. She stopped for a second to catch her breath. �Stop that,� I said. �It feels way too good.�

She broke away reluctantly. �You�ll have to make it up to me later,� she said with a sly grin.

We walked down the street and up Buffy�s front porch. I rang the doorbell. Buffy opened the front door. �What a surprise,� she said coldly. �So much for not darkening my doorstep again.�

�I�m not here for you,� I said.

She smirked. �I know exactly why you�re here,� she said, as she leaned in close.

�He�s with me,� said Tara, as she peeked out from behind me. Buffy stepped back, flustered. �We�re here for Dawn.�

We walked inside. �Why are you with him?� Buffy asked Tara.

Dawn ran down the stairs, a smile on her face. �Spike! What are you doing here?�