This was Larry’s Eulogy at her funeral
My wife Joanne Debbie Behar was diagnosed with Pancreatic Cancer on August 3 and began chemotherapy on Aug. 10 2004
Debbie went to all the chemotherapy with our son Dan, who was a true support for his mom always there with a ready ‘hi mom’ to cheer her up. Debbie never complained about all the medication that was given to her, she just lived with the hope it would help her to live a longer with the people she loved.
When her illness could not be beaten, she stood up and never complained,even when running fevers as high as 105 or as low as 92.She was brave,and mentally strong even as the cancer continued to grow.
I am not here to tell you Debbie’s biography. But I will tell you a little of her youth.
Debbie was raised in
She was 46 and we have been together for 27 and a half years. She was all of 19 when we married. I can tell you that I loved her the moment I saw her
I knew her for 28 years and they went by like a minute.
I proposed at pizza city on Crossbay blvd on a Sunday and by Friday we were married.
We had been going out for 6 weeks
I told her a while back ‘ if I knew you might leave me I would have married you sooner.’
She was the best,smartest,and classiest person I ever meet
I brought her home to my family and she become a loving daughter to my mother and father, a sister to my sister a favorite cousin to the rest of the family
She gave me 3 loving children,( Jack, Danny, and Melinda) a home, permission to get a few dogs, 3 Harley Davidson motorcycles (1 at a time of course)countless vacations, and most importantly…her love
She was a mother to 4 children 3 she gave birth to and 1 she married.
Sometimes I would be amazed at how Debbie could do everything.
She took care of our kids, planned our vacations and maintained a full time job.
She went back to college at 29 graduating from Hofstra at 37 with honors…she became a
C.P.A. at 39.
She was also doing work with the local Hadassah chapter ahava … there she worked from simple volunteer to president, she enjoyed the work and held a variety of positions… Here she found much love and many long lasting friendships, you ladies were her sisters and she you all dearly…
She applied for a job at the S.E.C.
A job that wasn’t only a source of income, it was also a source of pride and joy, a place where she made many friends whom she cared about. She made the best move in her life (work wise) when she joined the S.E.C. going thru 3 interviews in one day… starting at the bottom and gong all the way up…from staff accountant to assistant regional director in 8 years. Receiving examiner And supervisor of the year awards along the way
Debbie could not have done it without her good friends, some of whom are here today. They were her support and her lunch crew. She cared for you her friends as family and she truly cared for you more than you would know.
Her favorite meal at the end of a hard working day was lets eat out
She always knew what she wanted
Debbie loved to travel. Planning was here middle name. Debbie planned everything ou on vacation building an impressive resume of cruises vacations, and travel she was in her element, never having been there but with supreme self confidence getting there.
She earned everything she got and she deserved so much more.
She always said “anything worth having was worth working for and doing it well.”
Debbie always believed in quality not quantity
She lived life with no regretsand it is important to live like that… have no regrets
HOLD HER MEMORY NEAR TO YOU !
DO NOT FORGET HER!!
I NEVER WILL.
The women I held in my arms for all those years passed fom this plane while in the arms of her loving husband and children in her bed in her home at 10:30 p.m. on Feb.09 2005
This is what her friend
Joanne Debbie Behar
Hermosa,
Jacobo, and Dora
We
are gathered here today to pay our respect to our dear Debbie.
Debbie
was a pillar of strength for many of
us, a true friend, an honest person to speak to when you
needed someone you can trust.
If
I was to describe Debbie I can summarize it in three words. Honest
* Loyal * Devoted
Debbie
will always be remembered for her devotion
to her family. She loved her family
and mostly her Larry.
She
loved to help others and availed herself
when her community needed her. She
was an active member of HADASSA, a
resource to our congregation when we needed her. When
we needed her she was always there.
I
recall the first project we worked together was a Purim party for the kids in our temple. We worked till late hours of the night and
the event was a success.
Close
to ten years ago Debbie gave me the good news that she had finished school and
she been offered a job at a CPA firm and the Commission.
She
asked me what she should do. I said you
want to make money or be with your family.
Take the job with the Securities and Exchange Commission.
The
choice was hers in the end and one she is forever grateful she made.
Joanne,
as she was known at the Commission, stood out among her peers. She
loved her job, the people, the worked, her superior. No wonder she earned two of the highest
honors at the Commission, as examiner of the year and recently supervisor of
the year.
She
always had a positive comment to say about everyone and praised others for a
job well done.
It
was very moving when Linda and I visited her on Sunday and all our colleagues
surrounded her. A testament to the bonds
she had forged with her co-workers.
She
gave the appearance of being tough and stern on the surface as a regulator but
she was also fair and compassionate on the inside. She
was not afraid to take on assignments.
And in many instances excelled at what she loved to do most, Regulate.
Just
last night at 6:09 an attorney sent e-mail thanking her and her team for a job
well done.
Prior
to me joining the commission I worked for a different organization and we combined our efforts on a project
that once again was a success.
Not
long ago I joined her at the Commission
and had the opportunity once again arose to work with Joanne. Again with the help of our colleagues we were
successful.
Joanne
loved her profession and mostly the people she worked with as I stated and last
Sunday her last words to me were “Thank you for guiding me to the commission”.
I
knew what she meant. The commission and
the people she worked with were her passion, her love her newly extended
family.
She
respected everyone and received respect in return.
I
went to visit Debbie last Thursday at the hospital and she looked at me square
in the eyes and said I am not afraid. The courage that she displayed was no less
than we would expect from Debbie.
Debbie
last Sunday was so surprise of how many
people cared about her and she felt that so many people touched her life,
but in reality she had touched many of our lives and helped many in a positive
way.
Debbie,
Linda, Larry and myself were left alone for a few
minutes and it hit me that I was not
going to see my friend again.
Linda
and I will miss the ride in the Catskills, celebrating Roshashana
together, and most of all her smile and laughter.
I cannot say good bye my dear friend because you
will always be a part of my life as she will be a part of all of us, and my
fond memories of you will live forever.
Your
family, your friends your colleagues will always have fond memories for you.
I
know you are at peace my friend. No more
pain, no more medication.
My
dear friends I deliberately did not speak of her illness because Joanne Debbie Behar’s life was more than that.
A pillar of strength for
many of us, a true friend, an honest person, we will miss you.
Shalom,
en gan-eden que estes.