I came into this world, not chiefly to make this a good place to live in, but to live in it, be it good or bad. - Henry David Thoreau
In the end, everything is a gag. - Charles Chaplin
Art is a lie that makes us realize the truth. - Pablo Picasso
I start every morning with the New York Times. The first thing I do when I get up is read the obituary column. If my name isn't in it, I get dressed. - Alan King
It was one of those parties where ou cough twice before you speak, and then decide not to say it after all. - P.G. Wodehouse
It is not the truth that makes man great, but the man who makes the truth great. - Confucius
Do not take life too seriously. You will never get out of it alive. - Elbert Hubbard
If you aren't fired with enthusiasm, you will be fired with enthusiasm. - Vince Lombardi
That's the trouble with "Have a nice day!" - It puts all the pressure on you. - George Carlin
It has always been a rule never to smoke when asleep, and never refrain when awake. - Mark Twain
Never put off until tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow. - Mark Twain
The only reason I'm not running for president is I'm afraid no woman would come forth and say she slept with me. - Gary Shandling
A skeptic is a person who would ask God for his ID card. - Edgar A. Shoaf
If there were no bad people, there would be no good lawyers. - Charles Dickens
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