USBDT

"I watched a show on ESPN2 this morning that showed some vintage (1970s) footage of snook fishing in south Florida. My first thought was "man, look at the dorky clothes, the clunky boat, the fiberglass rods." Then it hit me...we wore dorky clothes, had clunky boats, and fiberglass rods. We've become vintage!! Oh, I know that all our favorite music can now be found on the "Classic Rock" station. I'm fully aware that we'll all complete our 4th decade on earth this year. It was just a shock to realize that a significant event in our manhood(albeit early)could be depicted in grainy 8mm film format...without audio. After the tears had dried, I was comforted by the positive aspects of reaching this status; we all have skills which can only be gained through years of experience yet still have the physical attributes needed to execute most of those skills (some skills are better left unexecuted), and we have enough disposable income to do pretty much whatever we want, within reason. Life is good, a little grainy, but good."

The U.S.B.D.T. (The United State of Bokeelia Drinking Team) -- Formed in 1980 in response to Carter's boycott of the Moscow Olympics. Long and storied team history. Meetings held annually, at least. Membership requirements vary, but stamina (in fishing and beer consumption) is considered a must. John McCabe (McRon) was, is, and always shall be the official Team Captain. Other founding members are Mitch Mastrobuono (Bone), Paul Stewart (Fat Boy) and Tom Woodward (Wood). Mr. Dick Mastrobuono (Dick) is an honorary member, since he discovered the damn place. (Editors note: McRon {the editor} is terribly disappointed that his nickname does not have a phallic connotation.)

The Butthead Hat Award -- The Grand Poobah of Bokeelia honors. Eligibility is immediate. To be considered, the candidate (team member) must show an ability to screw up. Big time. Past winners have stepped on and broken rods, forgotten the boiled peanuts, injured themselves on stairs or barnacles, fallen out of the boat, ignored channel markers, dropped gear overboard, etc. Fame is fleeting, however. This is a revolving trophy. As quickly as you win the award, someone can take it away (usually after the team has recorded the moment on film).

Peanous Daiquiris -- The Nectar of the Bokeelia Gods. The recipe's origins are understandably foggy. Legend has it that one team member, possibly several, decided to toss a single boiled peanut -- sans shell -- into a pitcher of frozen lime daiquiris years ago. Voila! A passion was born. Over the decades, modifications have been made; the shell is no longer removed. Good source of roughage. And a damn fine buzz. Bartending chores are shared, and always applauded. Forgetting the blender is not grounds for the Butthead Hat. It's cause for a lynching.

Sweaty Bettys -- Mentioned merely for historical perspective, this tradition once involved certain local females, who exhibited rather advanced stages of homeliness. No longer practiced. Not frequently discussed. While never a source of pride among members, this was an important period in the team's development.

The Silver Tarpon Lodge -- Owned and operated by Frau Barbara, a stern and eccentric inkeeper. Team headquarters for many years. Now considered off-limits. New training facilities are currently being evaluated. In the years to come, like other extraordinarily Sweaty Bettys, Frau Barb will be discussed less and less frequently. The team's decision: either leave her or shoot her. We left.

The McCabe Curse -- Powerful mojo. Causes an angler to flog the water fruitlessly for hours, sometimes days. Sometimes the whole trip. Severity seems to have lessened in recent years. However, since the curse no longer solely afflicts Captain McCabe, its effects can be experienced by any team member at any time.

Jimmy Buffett (Boo-fay) -- Composer of all Bokeeia anthems. Required listening during team outings (volume varies, according to blender operations). Tapes and CD's, the older the better, are supplied by team members. However, any Parrothead paraphernalia found by the team will be immediately confiscated and thrown into the canal.

"Hits Like Crazy On Everything" -- Infamous statement from a team member who shall remain anonymous (Mitch). Originally overheard while the anonymous member (Mitch) was publicly discussing the previous night's action at the mouth of Jug Creek -- the holiest of holy places. After 3 boats appeared that night, the practice was halted immediately. Sharing information is strictly forbidden, except within confines of the team. See "Butthead Hat Award." See also "lynching."

Code Names -- All productive sites are given appropriate code names by the team member whose hands first get smelly with fish at the new spot. These names are recorded and henceforth referenced by the team. Their locations are national secrets. The Honey Hole. Bone's Bend. Beer Fart Bay. Pedro's. The Mouth. Anejo Bay. Point Jesse. They don't exist on any chart, except ours, but you will learn these names and others. The list goes on and on. Adding to it is a high honor, although not as high as the Butthead Hat.

Losing Big Snook -- One of the oldest Bokeelia traditions. Methods vary, but all are effective. Perfecting techniques can take years. The custom has caused several equipment changes: heavier rods, heavier line (30 lb. Fireline instead of 15 lb. mono), and heavier leader (although some -- you still hear the snap, FB? -- occasionally insist on tempting fate). Alas, the results remain relatively constant. Ask Wood. He has it down pat -- "three per trip, at least."

And by the way, the only bar in Bokeelia, at Four Winds Marina, hasn't been visited by members of the team in our entire history.

PERSONAL ITEMS:
Rain Gear (So it won't)
Hat (McRon & Bone: Mandatory. Wood & FB: Optional)
Polarized Glasses (What shoal?)
Shaving Kit (Yeah, right)
Wallet/Money (Get this right and everything else on this list is optional)
Fishing License (It's a good cause)
Camera (For luck)
Smokes (Still legal in Florida)
Leatherman (Never leave home without it)
Flashlight (As if it would be handy when you need it)
Sunscreen (We'll be comparing scars in 40th reunion anyway)
Insect Repellent (Duh)
Clothes (Please)
INDIVIDUAL FISHING GEAR:
Rods & Tackle (For every conceivable situation. You'll use one outfit the whole time.)
Flys & Tying kit (Elitists only)
Filet Knife (For luck)
Ziplock Bags/marking pen (To keep track of your chum)
Wading Boots (For post-fishing debriefings)
Sun gloves (Compulsive elitists only)
Stringer (For luck)
BOAT/FISHING GEAR:
Boat, USCG equipped (Meaning plug in)
Cooler (Ah, yesss!)
Anchor, Line & Float (For exercise)
Deep Cycle Batteries (Extras if available, they always die on day one)
Charger/Ext Cord (See above, one per battery preferred)

BOAT/FISHING GEAR (CONTINUED):
Charts/Maps (You'd think we would know the way by now)
Spotlight (To re-enact Captiva run of '80. Did we do that? Or, was it a dream.)
Landing Net (For luck)
Dip Net (For retrieving dip overboard)
Hand Gaff (For luck)
Casting Net (For the flying banana competition)
Buckets/Bait Bucket (Capt J says: "You can never have too many.")
Tool Kit (What's that quote about "A little knowledge.."?)
First Aid Kit (With alka seltzer)
Spare Parts: fuses/filters/lights/tire/oil/etc. (To prevent failure of
these items)
Dock Lines (Take em with you when you go)
KITCHEN ITEMS:
Blender (Can you say, and spell, Peanous Daquiris)
Deep Fryer (For luck)
Cast iron skillet (For blackened luck)
Condiments, Spices, Batter (Secret ingredients only)
Coffee mug (If you have a favorite)
Thermos (If you have an addiction)
OTHER ITEMS:
Books, Magazines (Can't sleep without em)
Fishing Regulations (PhD's only, no one else will figure them out)
IGFA World Record Book (You just never know)
Weather Radio (To check for tornado warnings)
Chum (Does this stuff really do anything?)
Can Koozies (Optional, if you drink fast enough)
Old Photos (Preferably embarrassing ones)
Tunes (For the Anthems)

Boat (Reserve your john boat rental)
Cooler (Full of cheap beer)
Fishing Rod (Or 2, if you can borrow one from your dad)
Hat (Dual-purpose as tackle box)
Old Pair of High Tops (For post-fishing debreifings)
Cigarettes/Chew (Dual-purpose as insect repellent)
Wallet (With money, if you can borrow some from your dad)
Tunes (For the Anthems)
Blender (For the Anthems)