60 deg. -California residents put on sweaters (if they can find one.)
50 deg. -Miami residents turn on the heat.
45 deg. -Vermont residents go to outdoor concerts.
40 deg. -You can see your breath.
----------California residents shiver uncontrollably.
----------Minnesota residents go swimming.
35 deg. -Italian cars don't start.
32 deg. -Water freezes.
30 deg. -You plan your vacation to Australia.
25 deg. -Ohio water freezes.
----------California residents weep pitiably.
----------Minnesota residents eat ice cream.
----------Canadians go swimming.
20 deg. -Politicians begin to talk about the homeless.
---------New York City water freezes.
---------Miami residents plan vacation further South.
15 deg. -French cars don't start.
---------Cat insists on sleeping in your bed with you.
10 deg. -You need jumper cables to get the car going.
5 deg. -American cars don't start.
0 deg. -Alaska residents put on T-shirts.
- 10 deg. -German cars don't start.
----------Eyes freeze shut when you blink.
- 15 deg. -You can cut your breath and use it to build an igloo.
----------Arkansas residents stick tongue on metal objects.
----------Miami residents cease to exist.
- 20 deg. -Cat insists on sleeping in pajamas with you.
-----------Politicians actually do something about the homeless.
-----------Minnesota residents shovel snow off roof.
-----------Japanese cars don't start.
- 25 deg. -Too cold to think.
-----------You need jumper cables to get the driver going.
- 30 deg. -You plan a two-week hot bath.
------------Swedish cars don't start.
- 40 deg. -California residents disappear.
-----------Minnesota residents button top button.
-----------Canadians put on sweaters.
-----------Your car helps you plan your trip South.
- 50 deg. -Congressional hot air freezes.
-----------Alaska residents close the bathroom window.
- 80 deg. -Hell freezes over.
------------Polar bears move South.
------------Green Bay Packer fans order hot cocoa at the game.
AND AT:
- 90 deg. -Lawyers put their hands in their own pockets...........
