I jacked this article from Ubersite, which I came across on a long Google journey in an attempt to discover if it really is the amps that kill you--I would think it would be the joules or watts...
Science Teachers.
Odd people usually. I had the (mis/good?)fortune of getting taught by two teachers that would do anything other than teach you.
Here are some examples of why I scraped a pass in physics and failed chemistry.
<start of class>
Physics Teacher: So, did anyone see Star Trek last night? It was great, time loops and everything. There was this bit when Geordie.........
(20 mins later).......... Physics in action class, good old star trek.
Trout: No I didn't sir but isn't this getting away slightly from todays topic of electricity?
PT: Time Loops Hamilton, it had time loops.
Trout: Yes sir.
PT: And then the captain.........
<ten minutes after class starts>
Chemistry Teacher: Reminds me of the time I was county javelin champion.
Trout: Yeah, what county sir?
CT: The one I grew up in, now if you had seen my style. Flawless. Pterodactyl muscles.
Trout: But surely pterodactyl had very few muscles since they were a gliding bird. The probably had next to none in what is their equivalent of our arms.
CT: Would you like to see how strong pterodactyl muscles can really be? Outside in the car park?
Trout: No, not really sir.
CT: Good, so........when i was county javelin champ.
<ten minutes into a chemistry class>
Trout: Sir, is there anyway you can tell the difference between ethanol and methanol without any lab equipment?
CT: Well, when I was working for the BP there was this group of workers that decided to sample what was in one of the methanol tanks. There were five of them. Four died and the other one went blind. As they were taking him out the plant in a stretcher everyone wondered what had happened. I stopped the stretcher and took one sniff at his breath. Methanol......not ethanol. That's your problem right there.
Trout: So you can tell the difference between methanol and ethanol, by smell?
CT: Of course.
Trout: And can you explain the difference sir, or is the fact it's a lie going to make that too difficult?
CT: Pterodactyl muscles Hamilton, pterodactyl muscles.
Trout: Yes sir.
<middle of physics class>
Trout: Sir, if you were in a lift that was plummeting to the ground and you jumped out just before it landed I assume that unlike in the cartoons you'd sustain damage.
PT: No, the cartoons have it right. You'd be fine
Trout: So if I put that in the exam you'd mark it correct?
PT: Of course.
<he didn't>
<chemistry class>
Trout: So a nuclear bomb is fission-fusion-fission. Is that right?
CT: Well, you can have all sorts of bombs. Fission-Fusion-Fission-Fusion bombs; Fusion-Fission-Fission bombs; Fission-Fission-Fusion but they're not that great.
etc etc etc etc etc
Trout: So what one do i need to know for the exam?
CT: How would I know?
<I failed the exam>
<physics class, experiment set up>
PT: It's not volts that kill you, it's amps. This here has 3000 volts going through it but only 0.1 amps so you'd be fine.
Trout: Can I touch it then?
PT: Good god, no. I'm going to turn it off now. No more experiments. You lot can't be trusted.
<chemistry class, experiment set up>
CT: Now this experiment requires careful measurements.
Trout: Of what sir?
CT: Everything Hamilton, everything.
Trout: So, is the fact I used centi-litres instead of milli-litres for the first two ingredients a bad thing?
CT: Only if your lab partner adds in the third ingredient in centi-litres. Which he is doing now.
<smoke billows everywhere and our conical flask shatters>
CT: Pterodactyl muscles boys. Now go and get the janitor and don't come back until next monday.
Is it any wonder I was shit at science?
Every class was like the above.
I learned next to nothing.
Pterodactyl muscles, my arse.