It�s Prom Night. Of course, not my prom night. Although, I would be going. But...well due to the recent circumstances, I won�t be. I wonder if *he* is going? Probably with some slutty nurse.
Well screw this. I�m going to the basement. I�m sick of Donna�s room. I haven�t been in the basement in weeks. I�m too scared to run into him. The last time I saw him was in the hallway a week ago. I couldn�t look at him. I heard his voice and ran. I didn�t want to cry in front of him.
It hurts so much. It�s never hurt this bad. And I should be use to this, right? I mean, I have a history of being cheated on. So what�s new?True love I guess.
Well true love sucks. I didn�t think it would hurt this bad. I thought that if I told him I didn�t love him, I could convince myself I didn�t and then get over him. But those were just words. Words that were full of crap. Of course I still love him. True love just doesn�t die. I have no idea when I�ll fall out of love with him. It took me a couple weeks for Michael. But...the way I felt then doesn�t even compare to what I�m feeling now. I feel lost. I don�t know who I am. What to do...I�m so confused. I want to be with Steven. But I can�t. And it�s not like he�s stopping me. I�m stopping me. I guess part of me thinks its for my own good. That�s what my head is telling me..but my heart is telling me that I need Steven. But it�s not as easy as it seems. He cheated on me, he didn�t trust me... Ok. He didn�t trust me alone with Michael..and I understand that but for him to go and cheat on me just because he thought I cheated on him with Michael just because he saw us on a couch...that is just stupid. He should have talked to me. But no, he went and slept with some slutty nurse.
I ran, after I told him I didn�t love him. I ran until my legs gave out. It was then that I realized I had to get out of Point Place. What good is there in Point place? The only good thing I can think of are the Pinciotti�s. They are like a second family to me. And Donna, she�s my best friend. Even if she�s a lumberjack...But, besides that, Point Place is hell. And I need to get out. I thought I was done with heartache. After Michael, and when I started going out with Steven, I thought me and him would be together..maybe not forever, but I thought it would be a mutual thing when we broke up. But no, that�s not how it ended now did it?
I need to go somewhere and start over. For me. It�s time now that I focus on me. Screw school. I don�t need it. I�m sorry, I can live without it. I�ll find ways with my beauty to succeed. There�s only one thing that could change my mind, and that�s Steven. But...I don�t think I�ll tell him...I really think it�s for the best if I leave. Steven and I are done...he blew it, and I blew it even more by saying I didn�t love him...
I�m going to the basement now. To say goodbye, possibly. I don�t know when I�ll leave. But it�ll be soon now...whenever I feel like it...
Jackie closed her diary. She was serious about leaving. She had a suitcase packed under her cot. She hid it there from Donna. She didn�t want her to get suspicious or anything...
Jackie got up and walked over to the mirror. She stared at herself.
�Don�t I look wonderful� she muttered. She had no make-up, her hair was in a loose pony tail...she had on an old pair of overalls, that she would dare not wear in public..and a white tee-shirt on underneath. She took her ponytail out and shook out her hair. Amazingly, it was straight. She had straightened it in the morning after she took her shower. She picked up her eyeliner, but then threw it down and laughed, �Who�s going to be in the basement? Their all at *prom� she rolled her eyes, �Prom? What�s so great about it. Oh look at me, I�m in a dress. Oh look at me, I�m in a tux. Oh look at my ugly corsage, isn�t it great? Oh, look at the gym, it�s decorated. Oh wow, let�s spend my money on it. Oh yeah� She said sarcastically. She turned around and sighed, �The basement calls for me.�
*************
It wasn�t a surprise to find the door unlocked. It was always unlocked. She opened the door and walked in. It was the same old basement. Nothing was moved. She walked over to Eric and Hyde�s music collection. She picked up a Led Zeppelin Record and laughed, �Yeah. Right.� She lazily dropped it back down. �Led Zeppelin. Stupid band..and stupid shirt...� She didn�t find any records she felt like listening too, so she turned on the radio. She was taken back when she heard country. She changed the channel. Some slow rock song filed through the speakers. She was happy with her selection of music and went over to the couch. Leaning back, she closed her eyes and listened to the song...
"If she bends, then she breaks
She loves you but then she takes it away
She bends and she bows
She's cold, but she melts like snow"
�Great. A song about me. Just peachy� Jackie thought.
�Jackie?� Hyde�s voice was heard behind her. She jumped up.
�Steven! What are you doing here?!�
�Uh, it�s kind of my room.�
�But, but-� She stuttered, � The prom.�
Hyde laughed, �You thought I�d go to that thing? It�s another thing that the government is behind.�
Jackie rolled her eyes. There was an awkward pause.
�So what are you doing here?� He asked.
� You know, I really don�t know. I thought no one would be here. Guess I thought wrong. I�ll just leave.� Jackie started for the door, but Hyde stepped in her way.
�No.� He said a little bit too demanding. Jackie stared at him with a bewildered look, �I mean. You can keep me company.�
�I don�t think I�d be the best company right now. We aren�t exactly on best terms.�
�Look Jackie. Can�t we talk?�
�What is there to talk about, Steven?�
�A lot actually. Like you and me. And why you haven�t been answering my calls.�
�You know why. And there is no you and me anymore.�
Hyde sighed, �Jackie. I don�t know why.�
�Why what? Why I don�t call you back?�
�Why there is no us.�
Jackie was at a loss for words, for once.
Hyde stepped closer, �Jackie.�
Jackie backed away, �No, Steven. No.�
�No what? I didn�t say anything.�
�We can�t do this. You, me. We can�t talk about this.�
�Why not?�
�Because� She looked down at her feet, �It�s too hard.� She said softly. Hyde put his finger under Jackie�s chin and lifted her head up to look at him.
�Jackie. It doesn�t have to be.� He said softly.
Jackie blinked away the tears, �Steven...�
Their faces were almost touching.
�Jackie. I�m going to kiss you in about 10 seconds. And if you don�t want me too, well then you�re going to have to stop me.�
�Steven.� Jackie didn�t move, she just stared at him with big eyes.
�1...�
Jackie could feel his breathe reaching closer, and closer to her. She closed her eyes. And still, didn�t move an inch.
�5...�
Jackie opened them just in time to see Hyde close his eyes and lean in.
�10.�
His warm lips touched hers. Sending an electric shot through her body. One that she was so use to before. One that she missed and ached for, for the past weeks. But Jackie realized what had caused the absence of his lips... She quickly jerked back and wiped her lips.
�We can�t do this.� She tried to walk past him, but he grabbed her hand.
�Please Jackie.� He said. His voice sounding hoarse. His voice made her almost fall. He sounded like he was about to cry...he sounded like he did in the car....
She felt his hand leave hers. She looked over her shoulder and watched as he sat on the couch and bury his head in his hands. He looked up, and stared at the tv.
�Look Jackie. You know I�m sorry. And I�m willing to do anything to get you back. Because it�s not everyday that I fall in love with someone.� He glanced over at her and then looked back at the tv.
After what seemed like an eternity, Jackie finally turned around.
�I lied.�
He looked at her, confused.
�I lied about not loving you. When I told you I didn�t...I just did that to protect me, I guess.� She walked over and sat down in the lawn chair.
�I knew that Jackie. And in some weird way, I was proud of you.�
Jackie looked at him.
� Look at you. You�ve changed so much. You�re stronger now. And I like to think that I helped you become that...so...I was a little bit proud of the way you acted. I mean, it sucked completely for me. It still does. But...� His voice trailed off.
�I am who I am because of you.�
Hyde smiled a little bit.
�You did make me a better person, Steven. You showed me a lot of stuff. You showed me how money wasn�t as important. Showed me how the government was behind everything.� She threw him a big smile, and he laughed, �But most importantly, you showed me love.�
They both stared at each other. Jackie turned away and blushed.
�You did too.�
There was another awkward pause.
Hyde coughed and stood up, �Do you mind if I put on another song?�
�Sure.�
Jackie started to play with her hands.
�Steven...what�s the real reason you didn�t go to prom?�
�C�mon Jackie. It�s not written all over my face? It�s because I didn�t have the date I wanted.�
Jackie looked up and looked at him. Hyde gave her a smile, then turned around and searched through radio channels. He ended up on a different station playing the same song that Jackie had been listening too.
�Well,nothing else is on. So..what do you want to do?� He turned around,and found himself face to face with Jackie.
�I wanna dance.�
�Dance? Here?�
�Yes.� She held out her hand.
�But...it�s the basement.� He looked at her like she was crazy.
�So? Would you stop looking at me like I�m crazy and dance with me.�
�Why do you-�
Jackie put her finger on his lips, �Don�t ask. Just dance.� She reached for his arms and put them around her waist. She wrapped her own around his neck. She looked at him and smiled.
�See? This isn�t so bad.�
Hyde responded by pulling her closer, �But this is better.�
Jackie rested her head on his shoulder, and Hyde took the moment to inhale the sweet smell of her hair.
"If she bends, then she breaks
She loves you but then she takes it away
She bends and she bows
She's cold, but she melts like snow
She hates you, but then she makes a mistake.�
�Jackie.� He said softly.
�Confused and a lot to take
And where to fall out and when�
�Yeah?�
�I meant what I said.�
�And what was that?�
�That I love you.�
�So, bend and I'll break you
Leave and I'll take you back again�
Jackie stopped dancing. She knew he loved her. But the last time he told her, she walked away. And now, she was dancing with him. He had her in his arms. This time, she couldn�t get out. She looked at him, her mouth slightly open.
Hyde chuckled, �Don�t act so surprise. You already knew.�
�Yeah. It�s just different when I hear you say it.�
�How?�
�I knew you loved me before you told me. I�ve known for a while. But I never said it outloud. I�d only think about it in my head. And for you to say it out loud, that�s just kind of a like a reality check. It makes it real. And not just in my head. And when you said it...I walked away. And now.� She looked down at his arms, �I can�t.�
�Do you want too?� He leaned in closer to her.
She gently shook her head. She tilted her head up and pressed her lips softly against his. It was a short, sweet kiss. They pulled apart and looked at each other.
�What happens now?� Hyde asked.
�We just dance.�
�No. Jackie. This isn�t going to be a dance. I don�t want to dance around the subject. I need to know.� He let go, and stepped back, �I�ve been going crazy for the past weeks. I�ve been listening to damn country music. I can barely sleep or eat. You�re all I think about. And I�ve been kicking myself for screwing up. And we just can�t kiss and then dance afterwards.I need to know if this means we�re together or not.� He crossed his arms.
It was now or never. Jackie had to make her decision. This was the only thing that was stopping Jackie from leaving and she never thought she�d be in this situation.
Taking a deep breathe, Jackie took a step towards Hyde and placed her hands on his arms, �It means I want to start over.�
�What do you mean by that? Start over without me?�
�No. With you, Steven. I want us to start over again.�
�But why?�
�Because. If we start over, we won�t make the same mistakes again. We can�t just go back to normal.�
�I know that.�
�So...deal? Start over.�
�Yeah.�
Jackie smiled and grabbed his face, and kissed him.
�Hi, I�m Jackie.� she said, when she pulled back.
�Hi, I�m Hyde. But you can call me Steven.� He kissed her.
She pulled back, �Nice to meet you, Steven.�
�Yeah, same.� He eagerly kissed her again.
�Steven! Stop!� She giggled.
�Fine. Jackie. How would you like to take a tour of my room? I have a really comfy stack of mattresses on the floor.�
Jackie laughed, �Sure.�
�Great.�
Hyde took Jackie�s hand and led her in the back, both laughing.
It was a start to a beautiful relationship...
Again...
******************