407 – Fugitive Alien
ééé
Impressions
Holy crap! Main impressions: 1) Huh? 2) Wait wait wait. 3) What? At one point, Joel explains that this is a TV show run together to make a movie (think Riding with Death). It’s sort of like a poorly dubbed Japanese version of Commando Cody. The acting is so comically goofy that you almost don’t need the riffing. Captain Joe’s long crazy laugh, the funny gauges on the ship’s dashboard, the abrupt fistfights – you find yourself laughing more at the alleged movie than the riffing. Even so, the riffing is fair. It’s an enjoyable episode, but not a top level one.
Synopsis
Some “Wolf Raiders” attack what appears to be Earth. Said Wolf Raiders, without any explanation, wear long blonde wigs while doing the killing. The leader of the invaders orders them to destroy all the humans, which they commence doing. They do this as ineffectively as possible by shooting each individual human one by one with rifles. One of the invaders, Ken, feels guilty and doesn’t want to kill the women and children. He tries to stop his fellow invader from killing a child and in the attempt kills his fellow invader, who also happens to be his girlfriend’s brother. As far as I can tell, this this causes the multi-gazillion dollar invasion to be called off! As punishment, Ken is forbidden to return to his home planet. He tries anyway and takes off for home in his ship. His own guys fire on him and disable his ship. He bails out in space and is rescued by humans and taken back to Earth. The captain of the Earth’s best space crew invites him to serve on his ship and promises to keep his secret (that he’s one of the Wolf Raiders) in spite of many obvious reasons not to (for example, Ken repeatedly attacks him and his crew). He enforces Ken’s compliance by threatening to reveal his true identity to the authorities, who would certainly have him killed. Captain Joe figures he can use Ken to help him get back at the Wolf Raiders somehow.
Back on the Wolf Raider planet, (Valdar?) the Wolf Raider leader sends Ken’s girlfriend out to kill him. Wolf Raider law says the next of kin has to execute the murderer. So she’s conflicted. She loves Ken, but he’s a traitor and he killer her brother.
Captain Joe is given a mission to go to an Egypt-like planet, Cararr, and offer to protect them from another race, the Cesars, in exchange for money. The Cararris are unexpectedly rude and aggressive. While Captain Joe is involved in the contract negotiations, Ken wanders into town and gets in a fight and kills one of the Cararri soldiers and is sentenced to death. The ever resourceful Captain Joe learns that there is a Cesar officer in the prison with Ken. He tells Ken to escape and bring the Cesar officer so they can use him to trick the Cesars. Ken does this. Along the way, his girlfriend finds him and dies in an accident. Ken is sad for almost a minute, but then finds the Earth ship and they all leave together.
It ends with “To Be Continued.”
Host Segments
Prologue: Joel is doing a life simulation exercise and the ‘Bots are his chickens. He cuts off Servo’s head. Invention exchange. Frank and Dr. F invented a super dropper that gives all the ear, nose, and throat drops simultaneously. Joel invented a musical chair that plays like a xylophone and sits like a chaise lounge. Jack Perkins comes on to introduce the movie.
Segment Two: Crow and Tom are digging through their weird hats with hair on them that they’ve saved from parties. The got the idea from the movie. They make jokes about each of them. They mock Frank and Dr. F, who get mad. Jack Perkins says it’s delightful. Dr. F cattle prods him.
Segment Three: Joel tries to get Tom and Crow to play along with his fantasy to play Captain Joe.
Segment Four: Tom and Crow are very confused by the plot. Who’s fighting who and why? And why is everyone named Ken? Joel explains it’s a bunch of Japanese TV shows strung together to make a movie. Joel uses the Syd Field’s Screenplay Model to explain it. He predicts the blonde assassin will join Ken in a suicide pact. Jack Perkins tries to chime in, but Dr. F conks him on the head.
Segment Five: Joel is explaining his tiny button weapons. They read a letter. Jack Perkins declares that being genetically altered on cable TV is good TV.
Stinger: Captain Joe laughing like a maniac and they saying, “You’re stuck here!”
Funny Riffs
The invaders are wearing girl wigs as they shoot everyone.
Tom: When Josie and the Pussycats go bad.
Ken is shot in the leg.
Crow: He hurt his little pants!
Not really a riff, but funny:
Dials on the Earth ship’s dashboard read: “Space Speed,” “Cabin Air Presser” and “Tenperature.”
As Captain Joe runs through the hospital, he stops each nurse he passes and puts his hand on her elbow.
Riffs:
So, dinner Thursday?
So, dinner Friday?
So, dinner Saturday?
So, dinner Sunday?
He finds his wife, who dies immediately.
Joel: That takes the pressure off.
Captain Joe laughs maniacally for a while, then suddenly gets all serious: You’re stuck here!
Tom Servo: Mood swings!
Ken narrates his own situation as the camera follows him.
Crow: What is this? The Wonder Years?
Chipmunk-cheeked Captain Joe takes a phone call.
Joel as Captain Joe: What about my cheeks?! Why, you!
Rocky: Captain, anyone can make a mistake. Just as long as you don’t keep repeating it. I think we should get rid of Ken.
Girl: I disagree. Have you already forgotten? Ken saved our lives. I think he deserves another chance. Don’t you agree?
Rocky: OK.
Joel: Man of firm convictions.