BY: Arnold Martinez
As I see my friend Gina Laying there, motionless in her casket.I start to remember all the things we had done together. All the good times we had. Thinking how could I have let this happen. Just by one thought wasted, I'll never see her again. It was all over. Wishing I could have gone back and changed it all. Then as I get closer to her casket. I start to remember how this all came about.
Not to long ago....about a couple of days. Gina and I were hanging out at her house. I was keeping her company taking care of her younger brother Jason but we call him Jay. Well Jay and I were playing video games. Jay of coarse is beaten me. Gina was just watching us and on the computer doing her own thing.
Then the phone rang.Jay and I were locked into the game so we weren't moving. She answered the phone. She was talking, I couldn't hear anything Gina was saying. Gina was whispering, and I was trying to concentrate on the game. Gina hanged up the phone and walked quickly into her room. I asked her brother "What up with her?"He replied "she probably got use the bathroom."
We both break off into laughter. Then I realized I wasn't gone beat him in the game, so I gave up. "All right, that's it, it's over, I quite." I told him. He called me a loser for giving up to a younger kid then he started laughing.
I Just got up and started walking to Gina's room. To see what was wrong with her. I make it to her door and I hear her crying. I knock on her door. "Yo, I'm coming in", I said. I didn't hear a reply.
I walk in, see her laying in bed, crying like there is no tomorrow. "What's wrong?" "Why you crying?" I asked. "Calm down, calm down and tell me what's wrong."
After a couple of minutes. She finally stop crying so much. She tells me something very unexpected. She tells me, "Inches has HIV." Inches is some kid from our neighborhood. He jumps really high so everyone knows him as Inches.
I'm shocked Inches had HIV. I replied "Stop playing." She replied " No joke." I feel bad for him, but I start thinking why... I ask Her " So why you crying?" "Yeah, you know him but you barely ever cry." "It's not like It's going to effect you."
He seen her eyes start to water up. The she stuttering "Yes, it does." Trying to hold her tears back.
So know I'm confused. " I don't understand, what you mean it effects you?" "How? When?" "How does he know he got HIV? How you know he has HIV?" My mind is spinning of ideas thoughts and questions.
She sits up, whipping her tears away. Asking me "Remember when I answered the phone?" I nod my head. She continues "Well that was the hospital. Telling me I just tested positive for HIV," She pauses. "Inches is the one that gave it to me," She pauses again. "Cause awhile ago, he had called me. Cause the hospital told him to call his sex partners," starting to tear once again. "Well I got tested hoping, it wasn't going to happen to me." " I didn't want to tell anyone. I didn't want to get anybody worried for no reason," now she really starts crying. "Now I'm the one that has to make the call."
She stop talking, trying to regain her composer again. Also I guess waiting for a reply from me. I couldn't say anything, my mind is out of control now. It was like a dream to me. It just wasn't make sense to me right now.
When I finally found some words in my lost mind. I asked, "But when were you with him?" " I thought my boy John was your first." John is my friend I consider to be like my brother, I met Gina through him.
She told me "He was, remember when you and John went out of state for about 4 months for that thing." I Just looked at her with a shocked expression. "Well that is when it all happened." " I met him at a party then we started talking, a while later things happened."
So now I want to curse her out but yet, one my closes friends has a deadly disease. I asked her " Who else you got to call?"
She replied, " I just have to call John." " He shouldn't have it do cause we were always protected."
I asked her If she was telling her parents. She told me that she was going to tell them as soon as they got in. Then I told her, "all right I got to go. Want me to stay or something?" She replied she didn't need me to stay. So I leave her house mad cause she cheated on my boy but I was more worried then anything.I just had to go home and calm down. I had a half an hour walk ahead of me, so I had time to think.
Then I finally got home. I sat around for a while thinking, then I went on my online. I saw an e-mail from Gina. I opened it, it said " Arnold you've been one of my closes friends. I'll miss you." "This is not your fault, it was just meant this way." I signed off immediately and called Gina's house. Her brother answered the phone. I asked quickly, " where is you sister?" " In the bathroom" he replied. "seriously!" I yell at him, thinking it was a joke. " Nah, she went online for about a couple minutes. Then she made a call, then went to the bathroom," he replied a little nervous. " She did all that a couple of minutes right after you left," he added. " Yo, knock on the door. I have to really speak to her it's an emergency," I say panicking. "I think she washing some clothes, cause I smell bleach." I yell out "What!!". Next thing I know I had my mind spinning at a 100miles, then I just blackout.
I start to wake up, I find myself in a hospital bed and John is in front of me.
"Yo man you all right?" " Had everyone scared, you're parents are right outside getting something," John tells me. I start to sit up, scratching my head. Still a little bit dazed. Then I just say "yeah" looking around half confused. "So I see you know bout Gina and how she got it." he tells me. I just nodded my head. Then he told me that she had killed herself, that she drank half a bottle of bleach. " She couldn't take the news." I just sat there shaking my head in disbelief knowing she was gone. Then I started to tear.
Here I am, at Gina's casket. I can't believe she is gone. I asked myself " why I had to leave?" I should have stayed, everything would have been all right if I would have stayed. " Still in shocked, that I lost my friend. I grab her hand and whisper to her " I'll miss you." As I walk away in tears I remember her crying and me thinking. She is crying like there is no tomorrow and there wasn't.