The Ties that Bind
Chapter 7
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Lois suggested that she and Brenda take a walk and maybe go shopping, sensing that Jax and Ned needed to discuss their business dealings. Brenda reluctantly agreed and they left the room.
Ned went to sit in a chair in front of Jax's desk. Jax placed his elbows on the desk and rested his chin on his hands.
"Jax, this is a huge problem," Ned began.
"You don't have to tell me that, Ned. I know."
"There's no way to take care of this without involving everyone. It's going to get really messy."
"I know," Jax sighed. "This has Miranda's name written all over it, you know. She's the only one who would do this to me." He shook his head. "I knew she didn't love me or even like me all that much, but I never guessed she hated me so much. What was she thinking? Doesn't she realize that if I lose our business, my money-which she wants-goes with it?"
"I'm sure she does. But think about it, Jax. If you go down, it doesn't matter to her. She's with the other side, remember? The side that is getting all your money."
"True." He put his head between his hands and massaged his temples. The headache he'd had before was back with full force. "So, how do we do this, Ned? I don't want to lose, but I don't want anyone I care about to get hurt, either. I don't know how we can do both."
"You have to tell anyone it might hurt now. They may not believe you, but you have to. At least then it comes from you and it's your side of the story, in your own words." Ned shrugged. "Or maybe they'll believe you and no other explanations will be warranted."
"The thing I can't understand is how we let this happen. How did they get so far without us seeing it?"
"You said it yourself, Jax. You don't love her. We both stopped paying attention to her. She slipped it right by."
They continued to discuss the situation for hours into the afternoon. They were oblivious to the time as they tried to figure out the best thing to do.
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Six o'clock came and went in Jax's office and neither Ned, nor Jax noticed it. They had been furiously working all afternoon. It wasn't until almost seven-thirty that there was a knock on the office door.
The door opened and Jax looked up with a pen in his mouth, his hands full of papers and folders. Brenda and Lois walked in after he told them it was okay.
"We're not interrupting now, are we?" Lois asked.
"Depends, what time is it?" Jax asked distractedly, turning his attention back to his papers.
"Almost seven-thirty."
He looked up surprised and put down the things in his hands. "Then, no, you're not. We can be done for the night. Right, Ned?" Ned looked up for the first time with a confused look. "We can call it a day, right, Ned?"
Ned put down his papers and stood up. "Sure, sorry about that." They began to tidy the desk and stack the papers.
"So, where were you two?" Jax asked as he put everything away.
"A little bit of everywhere. We took a walk through the park and we went shopping for awhile," Brenda said. "I take it you haven't eaten yet?"
Both of them shook their heads. "Didn't even think about it."
"Good, because we brought some food home with us. It's in the kitchen and there's enough to feed an army, thanks to Brenda," Lois laughed.
"Me? I just didn't know what everyone would like! So we got a little bit of everything on the menu." Lois and Ned took off for the kitchen while Jax remained behind, seated in his chair.
"Are you coming, Jax?" Brenda asked, turning back to see if he was following.
"Go ahead, I'll be there in a minute." She nodded and left for the other room. Jax sighed and put his hands to his head. His head was pounding furiously, but it wasn't from the painkillers anymore. He was trying not to let it bother him. It wasn't working.
Brenda returned a few minutes later after he hadn't come into the kitchen with them. "Jax?" He looked up at her. "Are you coming?"
He reached for his crutches and Brenda asked, "So, how are you feeling now?" She noticed he looked a little tired, but otherwise fine.
"I'm fine, Brenda," he was trying not to take out his frustration on her.
"Good, what about your headache? Is it gone?"
"No, but it's not from this morning anymore."
"Business?" He nodded in response, not wanting to say anything else right now. "Are you hungry now?" she asked, as they headed towards the kitchen.
"Brenda, did anyone ever tell you that you ask too many questions?" Jax sighed. "I'm fine, all right? Leave it at that." He wasn't really upset with her, he was just irritated in general. She happened to be standing close by.
"All right, Jax." She held up her hands in a silent surrender. She was surprised by his reaction, but figured it was all about the business deal.
They went into the kitchen and saw that Lois and Ned had already set everything out. Lois had been right, Brenda did have enough to feed a small army. They started to eat, each trying to forget the problems of the day. Jax seemed to relax, but in his mind, he was still reeling from the information. Hundreds of thoughts, ideas, problems, and solutions flashed through his mind. He didn't know what he was supposed to do now.
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Later that evening, while Brenda cleaned up the rest of the kitchen, Jax went to his bedroom and changed. He put on his pajama bottoms and searched for the shirt, finding it in the back of his closet. He wanted avoid any chance of the tensions returning. Ned and Lois had left with Ned's promise to return to the apartment to work the next day. Jax lay down on the bed and propped himself against the headboard, his foot on the two pillows at the end. He reached for the television remote control, meaning to find something good to watch. He wanted to forget the day's dealings for the rest of the night. Finding an old movie again, he quickly got lost in it.
Half an hour later, Brenda went into the bedroom to check on him and see if he was up to talking. She found him asleep in front of the television. She knew he couldn't have been asleep long and decided not to wake him. Instead, she changed into her own silk pajamas that Lois had packed for her. She picked up her briefcase and, sitting at the desk in the room, began to read over her notes for a future campaign she was representing.
Jax was dreaming. It was the same dream that he'd had before, but it was even more vivid this time. He was running down a hallway, passing doorways on either side, each distinctly different and each locked. Suddenly, he reached the end of the hall. The only unlocked door was in front of him and he opened it. As he walked cautiously through it, he was transported back to that night and he was wearing the white dinner jacket and tuxedo pants. He looked around. He was in that garden, but it wasn't that night. Whereas he was expecting Brenda to appear any minute in her purple gown, she never did. He began to search for her, but found he wasn't allowed out of the garden boundaries. Finally, he saw her, just beyond the gates. She was standing there motioning to him. She was smiling happily. He tried to open the gates to get to her, but they wouldn't budge. He put his hand through the bars and reached for her, she was just beyond his grasp. Please, Brenda, just come to me. Please, a few steps toward me! If only she would come closer, he could grab her hand. But she shook her head, her smile fading. She couldn't come any closer. Something was standing in the way. He turned to look for some escape, but there was none. When he turned back, she was gone. Brenda! Brenda, where are you? Please come back! Brenda! he yelled in his mind. He continued to shout for her. Suddenly, he was silenced by a maniacal laugh. He recognized the voice that was laughing at him. No, there were two voices and he knew them both. Tears came to his eyes as he realized he was trapped. They had trapped him. And there was no escape now. He couldn't get to Brenda, not now, not ever. He sank to the cement tile in the garden, sobbing. All he wanted, all he needed right now, was to see her again, just once.
He could hear her voice calling his name. Someone was shaking him. Slowly, he opened his eyes. She was there. She was right in front of him, and she was saying his name. "Brenda," he said softly. Suddenly, he sat up straight. "What...?" his voice trailed off in the question. He realized the tears from his dream were in his eyes now and he wiped at them.
Brenda looked at his confused expression. "It's ok, Jax. You were dreaming."
He nodded. "Yeah, I must have been." He gazed around him. The television was off and Brenda sat next to him on the bed. "How long was I asleep?"
"About an hour. You were talking in your sleep, but when I heard you yell, I had to wake you." She looked at him, concerned. "What were you dreaming about? Do you want to tell me?"
Jax ran a tired hand over his face, remembering the dream and the desperation he'd felt in it. "You know what? I do want to tell you. Really, I do, just not tonight. Not right now. Brenda, you and I, we need to talk, and I mean, really talk. I know that, as I'm sure you do. But, please, not tonight." His tone was pleading as he seemed to almost babble the words away. He raised tired eyes to look into hers.
Brenda smiled softly and ran her fingers lightly through his hair. "Ok, Jax, we'll talk tomorrow. For now, why don't you go back to sleep?" she said gently.
He nodded slightly and closed his eyes again. Brenda watched him until she was sure he was asleep. Then, she went back to work on her notes, eventually going to bed two hours later.