The Ties that Bind

Chapter 21

Jax awoke the next morning with Brenda's arms wrapped snugly around him.  Her head rested on his chest with her ear just above his heart.  Her light breath tickled him as she lay sleeping.  He opened his eyes and looked at the breaking daylight around the windows of the room.  His alarm clock hadn't gone off yet, so he reached over and turned it off before it would wake Brenda.  He gently eased himself out of her embrace, reluctantly, without waking her.  He smiled and traced his fingers across her lips lightly before putting on his running clothes and leaving the room.

He ran his normal course, knowing he wouldn't be tempted to veer off it if the object of his desire was sleeping in his own bed.  Just as he was passing by the gates to her allotment, he noticed a sleek, black limousine turning onto the road.  He stopped dead in his tracks.  Sonny was home and he was a lot earlier than they had thought he would be.  Jax turned immediately and ran for his house at full speed, taking a few shortcuts he knew.

He tried to rationalize it as he ran.  Maybe it wasn't so bad.  Maybe Sonny wouldn't notice that Brenda hadn't slept there last night, that she wasn't still there this morning.  Maybe the North Pole wasn't all that cold.

When he reached his house, Jax ran for his bedroom, throwing open the door and looking for Brenda.  She wasn't in his bed.  He looked in the bathroom and she wasn't there either.  When he stopped, he realized that there was no trace of her in the house at all.  She was gone.

And then he noticed the note on his bedside table.  He smiled and picked it up.  Jax, I have an early meeting, so I had to go as soon as I woke up.  Hope you had a good run.  See you very soon, I hope.  Love, B.  He breathed a sigh of relief and sat down on the bed.  He just hoped she'd made it home in time to beat Sonny.

Brenda was walking out of the shower when the door to her bedroom swung open and banged against the wall.  She jumped and whirled around.  Her face paled as she saw who walked in.  "Sonny!" she exclaimed.  "What are you doing home already?"

Sonny gave her a quick glance and then went back to what he was doing, looking in the bedroom desk for a phone number he needed.  "Brenda," he said politely, by way of greeting.  "My business was finished early, so I came home.  Hope it's not an inconvenience."  There was a hint of sarcasm in his voice as he turned from her and left the room.

She sighed as the door closed again.  She was extremely glad that she had woken up when she realized Jax wasn't next to her and had had the foresight to come home to shower and change for work.  If Sonny had known she hadn't slept in her bed last night, he would have gotten suspicious and that was something they couldn't afford right now.

Brenda finished dressing and went downstairs to get a cup of coffee.  As she passed his office, she could hear Sonny on the phone.  She didn't make any nose that would interrupt him as she got ready for work.  Robin stopped her in the doorway just as she was ready to leave for the office.

"Brenda, I was wondering if you would have time for lunch today," Robin asked.

Brenda knew that tone.  It meant that she had something to discuss with her and she better not blow it off.  She smiled uncertainly at her friend.  "Sure, I guess we can do that.  Where and when?"

"I was hoping you'd say that," Robin smiled, easing Brenda's tension.  "How about Kelly's?  Around twelve-thirty?"

"Sounds great," Brenda said as she left the house and headed for her car to go to the offices.  Anything to leave that house and Sonny behind right now.  She didn't want to run the chance of slipping up in front of him.

Jax walked into his offices and smiled and Addie who was already seated behind her desk.  She smiled back, noticing he looked a lot better than he had the day before.

"Any messages?" Jax asked her as he passed her desk.

"No sir, not yet," she replied.

He continued into his office and closed the door behind him.  He was determined to get the problems he'd had the day before solved today.  If that meant he would work all day, he would do it, but he was tired of being behind all the time now.  Besides, after spending the night with Brenda, he felt like a new person.  As he sat behind his desk and picked up the phone to call Ned, he realized he had a goofy grin on his face.  He turned serious and set to work.  He would have a lot of meetings and a lot more work ahead of him before he left for the day.

~~~~~~~~~~

Brenda walked into Kelly's, a restaurant on the docks, at almost exactly twelve-thirty.  Robin was already sitting at a table by a window.  She sat down across from her and smiled.  When the waitress appeared, she ordered a glass of water and then turned to Robin.  "Okay, Robin, so what's up?"

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, I know you.  You were giving me that 'I need to talk to you about something really important' look this morning and I want to know what's so important."

Robin smiled slightly and nodded.  "You're right, I was and there is something I need to talk to you about.  Especially now that Sonny is back in town."

"What is it?"

There was no easy way to broach the subject, so she just blurted it out.  "It's Jax."

"And what about Jax?" Brenda instinctively lowered her voice when she said his name.

"I want to know what's going on with you and him.  I can tell there's something and there has been since you got back from New York.  Is there something between you two?  Something I should know about?"

Brenda considered it for a few minutes.  She didn't know if she should tell Robin, but maybe now that Sonny was back, it would be a good idea.  Finally, she nodded.  "Yes, I suppose there is something you should know about."

"What?"  Robin leaned forward eagerly out of curiosity. 

"First of all, you should know that I am going to file for divorce from Sonny."  She was a little surprised when Robin didn't look surprised by that comment at all.

Robin nodded and said, "I kind of thought that was going to happen."

"You did?"

"Yeah, I've known it for awhile, I guess.  Brenda, I can tell you don't love him.  It's in the way you guys talk, or rather don't talk, to each other.  I only wonder why you've lasted this long."

"That's the other thing you should know about.  The reason it's gone on this long was for appearance's sake only.  Sonny needs a wife in his business and I didn't want to be alone.  I guess now I realize that I was more alone with him than when I didn't have him.  But all of that's changed now.  I don't want to keep up appearances anymore."

"What changed that?"

"Jax changed that."

Robin looked confused.  "I don't understand."

"I'm not so sure I understand it myself."  Brenda continued to tell Robin everything that had happened in New York, or at least everything Robin needed to know.  She told her about Jax getting his divorce and Miranda's plan to destroy him.  She also told her about Sonny's involvement in the plan and the speculation that it was because of her relationship with Jax.  She ended with the fact that she had every intention of moving on in her relationship with Jax, now and when she was divorced from Sonny.

"Wow," Robin said when Brenda finally stopped.  "I didn't realize there was so much to it.  Why didn't you tell me sooner?"

Brenda shrugged.  "I don't know.  I guess I wasn't sure of everything myself, but now that I am, I know that you needed to know what was going on.  But you know that you can't breathe one word of this to Sonny yet, right?  He can't know that I'm planning to divorce him yet."

"Yeah, I get it.  You need Sonny's help to get Miranda to give up on her thing with Jax."

Brenda nodded.  "Right.  It's the only way, Robin."  She knew that her friend might have a problem with her lying to Sonny, but it was chance they were going to have to take.  It was their only chance, too.

Robin and Brenda finished their lunch and Brenda returned to her office just after one-thirty.  She had a few meetings right away and then when she finally had a break, she picked up the phone and called Jax.  Addie answered the private line again and told her that he was currently unavailable, but that she would have him call her as soon as he could.

She hung up the phone and sighed.  She almost laughed out loud at the fact that she couldn't even go half a day without thinking of wanting to her his voice.  She wondered if she would have called his house just to hear his answering machine if the phone hadn't rung a few minutes later.  Grinning, she picked it up.  "Brenda Barrett," she said cheerfully.

"Hey Beautiful," Jax said as soon as he heard her voice.  He'd just gotten off the phone with a client and as soon as he'd hung up, Addie was in his office to tell him Brenda had called.  He called her immediately.

"Jax!" she exclaimed happily.  "I just called you and Addie told me you were unavailable."

"I was, but for you, I'll make myself available anytime."  He smiled and turned his chair away from the door, leaning back and crossing one ankle over his knee.

"You didn't," Brenda said, uncertainly.

He laughed.  "No, I didn't, but Addie did tell me and I called you right back as soon as I hung up the phone."

She breathed a sigh of relief and laughed.  She could feel a heated blush coming to her cheeks as she talked to him and felt like she was in high school again and talking to her crush.  "Jax, I feel so ridiculous," she revealed.

"Why?"

"Well, look at me.  I can't go even a few hours without talking to you now."

"And that's such a bad thing because…?"

"It's not, but it's certainly making me feel like I'm sixteen years old again."

"If it'll ease your mind at all, I was going to call you as soon as I got off the phone anyway."

"You were?  Why?"

"Because I wanted to hear your voice," Jax said softly.  It was amazing him how much he was missing her already.  He'd seen her just that morning and now he wanted to see her again more than anything.  "You know, it was about this time yesterday that you were here and I didn't have to go through this," he teased.

Brenda laughed again.  "Yes, but we both know that if I did that every day, not only would we never get any work done and you'd fall even further behind, but people would begin to get suspicious, too."

"Yes, I know.  And speaking of people getting suspicious, did you see Sonny this morning?"

"How'd you know about that?" she asked, surprised.

"I saw his car while I was out running.  When I ran back to the house to get you, you were already gone.  Did you make it home in time?"

She nodded.  "Yes, I did.  He came in as I was getting out of the shower.  He didn't even apologize for not calling to warn me.  He just basically ignored me just as he always does."

"Well, at least he doesn't know anything."

"No, he doesn't, but this does present a small problem you know."

"Which is?"

"Now I won't be able to see you without him knowing something is going on, or at least thinking there's something."

"Yeah, I know, but remember, he already thinks there's more than friendship here."

"Yes, but it was never true before.  You know I can't lie to anyone in person very well.  If he asks me now, it'll show in my face that I'm lying to him."

Jax sighed.  "I know.  It's one of your endearing qualities."  There were a few moments of silence as they sat thinking about what they would do now.  He was coming up empty for a solution right at the moment.  And he heard the buzzer in his office that indicated that his next meeting was there.

Brenda heard it, too.  She asked, "What was that noise?"

"My next appointment.  I have to go here, but I'll call you back later, okay?"

"Okay," she said reluctantly.  "I love you, Jax."

He smiled.  "I love you, too, Bren," he said before his door opened and his next meeting walked in.  He hung up the phone and stood to greet the men walking beside Ned into his office.

For the next two hours, Jax and Ned met with their two potential clients to discuss the future of a merger with them.  Though he was in a good mood all day, Jax was glad when they finally left.  With this meeting, he was finally caught up again and he could start to relax about what he had missed while he was out of the office.  Now, all he had to worry about was the project they had to begin again and the plan for Miranda and Sonny.

He arranged to meet with Ned for dinner to discuss moving on their plan now that Sonny was back in town.  He knew he wouldn't be able to see Brenda tonight because of that and he decided to make the most of the evening without her.  As much as he could of it, anyway.

~~~~~~~~~~

Jax returned to his house a little after nine o'clock.  Even he had to admit it was strange coming home to such a completely empty house.  Miranda had asked Mrs. Whitter to stay on with her and the woman had agreed because for whatever reason, she liked Miranda more than Jax.  He didn't really care.  When he had time, he'd hire another housekeeper, but he wasn't worried about it now.

He opened the front door after parking his car in the garage and he didn't turn on the lights as he walked in.  The moonlight from outside was enough to light the front foyer for him.  He went immediately upstairs to his office and turned on the light.  After he put down his briefcase and turned on his computer, he walked over to the bar he kept and poured himself a drink.  Swallowing it quickly, he poured another and held onto it.  He stood in front of the windows that looked out onto the back lawn.  Everything that surrounded him was dark.  The closest property to his was blocked by a wall of hedges and the house was parallel to his so neither neighbor could see into the other's house unless they stood on their balconies.  He looked up at the starry night and sighed, wishing he could be with Brenda right now.

He laughed at himself for thinking that again.  It was truly amazing how much he missed her when she wasn't there with him.  For almost five years, he'd lived without seeing her every day and now he couldn't go one hour without thinking of her at least six times.  True love, he thought.  It really did consume you.

Slowly, he finished his drink and set the glass down on his desk when he went back over to it.  He was planning to work on the Miranda and Sonny plan that night.  He and Ned had talked about it over dinner at the PC Grille and they'd come to the decision that the sooner they started, the sooner they could be done with it.  They'd also had a big discussion about whether or not to involve a business ethics lawyer in their plans.  Ned seemed to think they should now.  Jax disagreed.  If they involved one now, the lawyer would insist on doing it the long way and they'd never be done.  There would be no quick-fix like they were looking for.  He would want to go back over the records time and time again, looking for something to tie them all in together.  But Jax knew they wouldn't be able to find it.  The only way was to do it with another 'new' company and track every transaction, keeping records for evidence.  But he'd had a heck of time convincing Ned of all that.  When he finally agreed, Jax wanted to end the dinner before he could change his mind.  He'd come home right after and needed a drink.

He found himself actually wishing there was someone else in the house for him to talk to.  While he didn't mind the silence, there were times when he just plain needed to talk to someone.  This was one of those times.  He felt like he was lost all of a sudden without Brenda there with him.  But she was the reason, that was the problem.  After spending one full week with her as he had and the night before now, he didn't want to be without her.  It was an emptiness he was feeling deep inside and he just needed someone to talk to, he thought.

Done feeling sorry for himself, Jax set to work with their plan.  He began to lay the groundwork for contacting Miranda and Dolway to get involved.  He worked for a few hours, stopping when he began to feel the muscles in his neck tightening from sitting at his desk for so long in the same position.  He hadn't gotten as much work done as he would have liked, but it was certainly sufficient for the evening.  With any luck, they could begin putting the plan into action the following day.

Now that he was done, his thoughts reverted back to Brenda and he poured himself another drink.  It was eleven o'clock and if was as big a risk taker in his personal life as he was in his professional life, he would have called her, but he wasn't and he decided not to chance that Sonny would pick up the line.  Instead, he finished his third drink of the evening and decided that going to bed would be the best option.

As he lay alone in the bed, he couldn't help but long for her once again.  It was getting ridiculous, he knew.  He also knew that there was no way he was going to a go a second longer without her than was absolutely necessary.  He fell asleep thinking that and was soon dreaming of the life they would have.

~~~~~~~~~~

Brenda took the first opportunity she had to do some snooping in Sonny's office, but she came up with nothing, as she reported to Jax.  They hadn't seen each other at all in the last three days, but they'd spoken every day on the phone, at least twice.  Jax had been contacted that Miranda had picked up on the phony company and she was inquiring about it.  She also knew that Jax had a vested interest in it, so he was sure that was the reason she was looking at it.  They just needed to her make a bid on it to move to the next stage.

Jax was alone in his office, working, when his private line rang.  He answered it to find Brenda on the other line.  "Hi there," he said when he heard her voice.

Brenda smiled and responded with, "Do you have any idea how hard it is not to see you every day?"

He laughed softly.  "I think I have some idea, yes."  They talked for a few minutes before he asked, "Bren, did you ever get a chance to talk to Sonny again?"

"Yeah, I did, but he won't tell me anything.  I haven't been able to get anything from his office either.  I'm guessing Miranda hasn't talked to him yet."

"He's not suspicious yet, is he?"

"I don't think so, why?"

"Just being careful, I suppose.  Miranda hasn't made a move yet on anything so there isn't much else to do, but wait."

"I know," she sighed.  She really wanted to see him.  It had been way too long since she'd been able to look at him, touch him, kiss him.  She smiled thinking about it.  "I just wish this whole thing was over with already."

"So do I, sweetie, but it won't be long, you know that."  Before he could say anything else, the door to his office swung open and banged against the wall.  Jax turned surprised at the interruption.  Addie was desperately trying to get whoever it was to stand back and wait in the reception area.  "I've got to go," he said quickly and dropped the phone into its cradle without waiting for a response.  "Addie, what's going on here?" Jax asked as he got up from his desk and walked toward the door.

His secretary turned and looked at him helplessly.  "I'm sorry, Mr. Jacks.  He wouldn't wait in the hallway.  He insisted on seeing you now."

"It's okay.  Let him in then," Jax consented, not knowing who it was.  He was nearly floored when Sonny Corinthos walked in the door.

"I know what you're trying to do, Jax, and it's not going to work," Sonny announced as soon as he stepped through the doorway.

 

Chapter 22