Kerosene County

The Paranoia Police was having an unusually busy week. Many people called in and claimed that they were being followed. Since it most likely was the Paranoia Police themselves who were doing the surveillance they could neither confirm nor deny anything. This of course only fueled the paranoia of the people, but that is the purpose of the Paranoia Police anyway so nobody should be surprised. Another thing that kept the Paranoia Police busy that week was the high number of undercover secret service agents coming in from all over the world. Apparently there was going to be some kind of political convention, only problem was that nobody knew where it was going to be or who it was that was going to have it, Democrats, Republicans or maybe even Nazis. Nobody could say for sure.  

Dave and Steve was making themselves ready for the inevitable riots in their own way, smoking weed and listening to old Stones records on vinyl. It was Street Fighting Man and Let It Bleed, Sympathy For The Devil and You Can't Always Get What You Want. They were having a blast, man. So much in fact that they almost missed the convention. 
-Dude, something scary happened to me yeesterday, Steve said.
-Yeah? Go on and tell us then, said Davee.
-Yeah, I was walking down the street likkes when this guy comes up to me and asks me if I had any cigarettes. I said sure and reached for my pack of Gitanes. Once I had given him the cigarette and lit it for him he started to talk about all these cops that he had seen patroling the streets. There was  just too many of them he thought. I agreed of course, but then he said something that really made my blood curl.
-Really? What was that?
-He said that he had seen one of the copps carrying a machine gun up on a roof.
-No?! Are you sure?
-Well, that's what he said anyway, I donn't know if it's true or not, but if it is it's very scary you know.
-Oh yeah, no doubt about that, but can yyou really trust the word of a man on the street, a complete stranger and all.
-He didn't look like the kind of guy to tell a lie. He seemed legit.
-So what should we do with this informattion?
-Nothing, except keep on the look out foor snipers and other things like that. We have no choice. Scaring people more than neccesary in advance will only bring panic. We, you and me, should be prepared though.
-Ok, true enough. But what about the parrty, shouldn't we at least tell them?
-We could ask party central and see whatt they have to say, but unless they think it's a good idea we won't spread it to the rest of the party. At least not before we have more information.
-Ok.
-Ok.

Meanwhile, at party central, John Lentrot raised his head from the newspaper he was reading and looked at Jane Goldstein who was sitting across from him at the other side of the table.
-I think I've found something, he said.<
-Really? What is it? Jane asked.
-It says here that a number of the leadeers of the religious right are coming to town and will be shaking hands with the people all afternoon tomorrow. It doesn't say anything about any convention but one can guess.
-Yeah, I definitely think that you're onn to something here.
Jane smiled and then looked the other way. She always did that. John tried to smile back, but her face had already turned in the opposite direction so there was no one to smile at. He continued reading. Jane on her part was surfing the internet trying to find information. There was nothing, not one single clue. She eventually got frustrated and screamed:
-Won't somebody give me something sometiime soon?!!?
-I don't know, said John, what do you waant?
-Oh I don't know, anything, anybody, youu tell me.
-How should I know what you want?
-Well, it would be nice if you knew someething.
-I know something, I know a lot, just noot what you want.
-Yeah, and that's the problem ain't it?<
-Really? Why?
-Cause you is stupid.
-Oh, that's mature.
-Stupid stupid stupid.
-I'm ignoring you.
-No you're not, you can't ignore me.
> -Yes I can.
-No you can't.
-I can and I am.
-You can't and you aren't
-Ha ha, very funny, go  back to worrk now.
-You can't tell me what to do.
-Well I'm going back to work at least. -Yeah, you do that. Coward!
John pretended not to hear her and went back to reading the newspapers. She always did this. Trying to tease him and arguing with him, he couldn't understand why. She was hopeless. Hopelessly annoying, and cute. No, he couldn't think like that, she was a comrade, and besides she wasn't interested in him. She thought he was a geek, a dork, a dweeb, and a coward. She was constantly criticising him and telling him that he could never do anything right. She couldn't like him. 
Jane was thinking about John and about how annoying he was. Why could he never do anything right? Why couldn't he just kiss her already? She thought about John and how adoringly cute he was. Cute but clueless, why oh why couldn't he see? Why wouldn't he give her what she wanted? Why couldn't he see what she wanted? Was he really that dense? She knew he liked her. What guy in his right mind wouldn't like a girl like her? Also she had seen him looking at her and at her breasts and while it wasn't proof that he loved her it didn't exactly disprove that he found her at least somewhat attractive. Or was she just clutching at straws. Was he gay like all the other girls in the party had said? He could be, he was feminine enough, he never talked about girls, but he liked to gossip with the girls, he never talked about boys either though. Except one time when she and the girls had been talking about which guys in the party was cute and which wasn't. She had said that she thought Dave and Steve were cute, she had wanted to say John but he was in the same room and was listening so she couldn't say it, not in front of him. Anyway, then John had said that he didn't think Steve was cute, Dave was ok though, but not as cute as Brian, who was the cutest guy in the party according to him. This of course had only fueled the other girls speculations about him being gay, and she had to agree that it was pretty strong evidence.

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