Insults spew from mouth like vomit.

Name: Melissa
Age: 17 (practically)
Birthdate: June 12
E-mail: [email protected]
AIM: checkmyalpaca
I like you: Easy Mac, Batman, kung fu movies, pajama pants, straighteners, dance breaks, the noble kinkajou, Weezer, carrot juice, ping pong, correct spelling, The Simpsons, coke time, NYU, robots, cameras, trying on hats, coconut monkeys, translating Spanish soap operas, Nintendo, peeling fruit, spitting off ledges, octopi - but not for eatings...
These can die: Reeses, kids who don't shower, chickens, the phrase "I know, right?", formalwear, squirrels, ski masks, slush, Leonardo di Caprio's disproportionate head, raisins, Charlie Brown, my inability to juggle or walk on my hands, Staind and Creed, burn marks, broken watches, blasting the AC, chemistry, One Tree Hill, little kids who won't shut up, drama whores, episodes 1 & 2 of Star Wars, papercuts, flip flops with freakin' heels, cockroaches, and dull scissors...

Many moons ago, approximately seventeen years worth of moons to be more specific, the planets had reached a certain magical alignment and a mystical, prophecy-fulfilling child was born.

In another hospital room in Texas, another, more awesome child was born. This child was named Melissa, and she would grow to become the Jew part of the Jewsian Fusion (which is much better than fulfilling some crappy prophecy, which turned out not to be that important anyway).

Nowadays, Melissa spends most of her time shaking her fist at things and thinking about baking cookies. She's also attempting to expand her movie/soundtrack collection for her eminent departure towards college (donations accepted). Hopefully she'll end up somewhere in that crazy film industry, for after all, there's no business like show business. However, she'll take a job designing the packaging of watches at Fossil. She likes Fossil. It might go back to the seventh grade, when they gave her a free red hat. She likes free red hats.