Give me something alternate title, Relapse
by Jewls13
freedom
lightness
a strange feeling of...tingles
yes, that's it
tingles all through me
what is this?
I'm am not used to this
Is this, happyness?
that feeling that has eluded me for so long,
can this be it?
Is this what people are slowely killing themselves for
is this what people are so willing to do anything for?
tingles?
Tingles all through me
this is happyness.
I still don't understand it
or why people work so hard for it
but it is nice,
for now.
it won't last
I won't allow that to happen
this might be nice,
but pain is a lot more fun
Pain I can deal with
pain I understand
this...this is madness
only I see sanity as madness
there is a comfort in the darkness
I've made a home there
and this happyness won't last
because I won't let it
because eventoully
I'll have to go back to my cave and face the truth
face the reality of the situation
of my situation
I don't belong to the world of happy people
I smile and pretend that I belong there
but I don't
I wish that I did
no,
I wish that I wanted too
but I don't
mabey
I don't know anymore
which side is me?
can someone tell me?
can someone help me?
can anyone help me?!
why do I struggle
why instead of picking up that knife,
and drawing another line beside me almost healed scars,
why do I chant, "I'm not crazy, I don't want to be crazy"
WHY GODDAMIT! WHY
what am I saving myself for?
can't somebody help me?
can't somebody just give me a fucking reason?
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