| Trouble Shooting For Jesus |
| **When trying to see if your speakers work, yell at your speakers. If they yell back at you, well, then they work. If they do not yell back then play horrible Satanic Rock Music until it screams "Lord Save Me!" **If your CD drive starts smoking, then the CD in it is contaminated by Satan and you must douse it in holy water. **Do not buy a computer with Intel Inside. It means intelligence inside. It will be way too much for your mind. **When the whistling Chinese woman appears on your screen, back away! She is a consort of Satan and whistles a tune of Hell that might lure you away from Jesus. **When the paper in your printer jams, your printer is telling you that what you are writing will not help spread the Word. Erase and try again. Eventually, with much frustration, you will prevail. |