Part 1...... "Hey shorty, ya feelin' better" Cory asks walking into your hospital room. "Yeah I guess.." You answer quietly looking at your bandaged wrists. " I thought I told you to call me when you felt like doing that sh*t again." "Yeah I know, and I'm sorry but.." "NO, no buts!" He stares at you, hurt and sadness in his eyes. "You are like my little sister babe, I don't want to see scars on your wrists. I love you to much to let that happen." He stares at you some more hopping what he says will sink in. You stare at your hands and hold back your tears, you love him, you love him more than anything. But the pain out weights that love, you don't want to die, but you don't want to live. Nothing you do helps the pain go away. So you choose to cut yourself and hope that no one finds you and you can finally be at peace. But that never happens, if Cory doesn't find you, your best friend Samantha always does. You hate to see them so worried about you, but you just can't help it.... "Jess?" Your suicide watch nurse Doyen comes in the room and smiles when she sees you asleep. "She's asleep but you're welcome to come in." She says to someone, "I'm not asleep, I'm just laying here trying to figure out how to cure boredom." Doyen laughs and walks in all the way "I might have a solution to that hun." She says with a grin. "What are you so happy about?" You ask with a suspicious look. "Well there's some guys here to see you," "If Cory brought his posse again he can bug off." Doyen just smiles, "No no no, it's not Cory, they said they got your letter and wanted to talk to the beautiful girl who wrote it." Your eyes go wide and you jump up in bed "WHAT?" "Well someone's feeling better, so should I let them in?" "Are you kidding me YES!" She walks to the door and smiles letting the men enter. You watch as Scott Stapp, Mark Tremonti, Scott (Flip) Phillips and Brett Hestla walk into the room. Scott looks around the room noticing the Creed poster on the wall he smirks. "Good band" You turn beet red and want to hide, but insted hang your head down so your hair covers your face. Mark sits next to you on the bed, "Now look what you did man you embarrassed her!" He puts his arm around your shoulder and pulls you to him, putting his finger under your chin he tilts your face up to look at him. "There that's better." He smiles and so do you. "Now what's a pretty girl like you doing in a joint like this?" Scott asks coming over to sit on the other side of you. "Being watched 24/7.." You say under your breath. "Well from the looks of these bandages I would say that's why." Scott whispers in your ear. You look at him then quickly look away, anger taken over by sadness in your eyes. "Guys can I talk to Jess alone?" Mark looks at Flip and Brett, they all knew that was coming. They all get up and leave saying they'll be back in a bit. Sitting alone with Scott you start to get nervous, you knew this would happen but didn't know it would happen so fast. He gets up and starts to pace the room slowly, he runs his hand through his hair as if trying to think of exactly what to say. Finally he looks at you, "Why did you do it?" Trying to break the ice a little and not make it so tense in the room you just smirk "It took you that long to come up with that?" He just looks at you seriously, you swallow hard, my god those eyes. "I'm serious Jess." You can feel the tears welling up in your eyes, you really don't have an answer.. "I hate life" He shakes his head, "But why??" "You read the letter you know why." You answer feeling a tear roll down your cheek. He looks at you and can see the sadness in your eyes. He does know why, he just doesn't understand completely. "You're right, I do know why, I've just never been that depressed hun, I understand some of why, but not all of it. Help me understand hun." His eyes are pleading with you, "I can't,.." You close your eyes and look away. He comes over to your bed again, "Yes you can, you know you can. You have been through so much, more than anyone I know. You shouldn't have to feel this way, you shouldn't want to die." The tears are streaming down your cheeks as he pulls you to him. "Shhhhhhh sweetie listen to me, no one should feel the way you do. You can beat this, what do you need?" You cry into his chest and hope and pray the conversation will end soon. You don't know how much more you can take. "I need to get away from here." He pulls you up, "Then I'll get you out of here." "No," you look at him, "Not the hospital, this town, this state, I have to get away from it. I hate it so much" He stare into your eyes and can see how much you really do need to leave, he sighs "Done," You look at him confused "You want to leave, all right, would coming on tour with us help?" You can't believe those words just came out of his mouth. "Well?" He looks at you, "Yes," is all you can manage to get out. "Then you're coming with us." Part 2... A few weeks later .... You are just grabbing your duffle bag to bring it upstairs to the door when the doorbell rings. You run up to answer it and there stands Scott and a guy you don't recognize. "Hey you ready?" Scott asks smiling. "Yeah, I think I got everything." You lock the door as you step outside on the front step with them. "Here make Vince take that" Scott say grabbing your bag, and handing it to him with a grin. "Oh sure make me a slave." Vince says smiling and takes your bag. "Vince here is on the road crew, he'll show you around, if he hits on you just slap him." You laugh and smile at Vince. You arrive at the hotel where they are staying for a couple nights, they have a show to do and then have a day off. Scott shows you to your room, you discover right away that it's his room, the pictures of Jagger kind of gave that away. You wonder why you're staying in the same room but decide against asking right now. You're just happy to be leaving home for a while. After your settled it's almost time to leave for sound check, Scott leaves you "in Vince's capable hands." While they do sound check. Vince shows you around the backstage, ok so you head straight for the game room. That's besides the point. You wound up playing ping pong and each one one game. "I'm better," Vince teases you, "Oh really and who beat you just a minute ago? Oh that's right me." You are too busy teasing each other to notice Flip and Mark have entered the room, "She beat you man?" You both look over at the door and see Flip making faces behind Mark. You crack up laughing. While Mark and Flip start to tackle each other, Scott walks in, looks down, steps over Flip and Mark and acts as though nothing is going on. He grabs a beer from the mini fridge and walks over to you. "So is he keeping you busy?" He asks motioning to Vince, "Yes he is," you say smiling at him, "Had to slap him yet." You can't help but laugh, "No he was a perfect gentleman for your information." Scott looks at him and winks, "Oh really, so you haven't hit on her yet, what's wrong with you man?" Vince just smiles back at him and then turns to you, all of the sudden he is running towards you yelling, "Oh Jess marry me please, you are so hot, kiss me baby!" You run away laughing at him, but trip and land on Mark, "Well looks like she likes me better man." Mark helps you up and explains Scott and Vince to you. "They are maniacs, simple as that, stay away from them and you will be fine." He smiles at Scott and Vince and then goes to the ping pong table to play with Flip. You crash on a couch still laughing, "I'm sorry, Scott made me do it." Vince says sitting next to you. You just smile at him, Scott sits on your other side "Want to go back to the hotel for a bit?" "Sure" you answer and say by to Vince, he waves good bye and heads over to play with Mark and Flip. "So you're responsible for Vince pouncing on me hu?" You smile at Scott, while he's driving. "Is that what he told you?" "Yes, is that not the truth?" "Oh it's the truth, I'm just curious what you really think about him?" You look out the window for a minute and think, "You like him don't you?" Scott looks at you with a mischievous grin. 'W.. Well, I don't know," "Yes you do." He can tell just by looking at you. "Fine, yes I like him, not will you drop it?" He just smiles at you. Back at the hotel you decide to finally ask Scott why your sharing his room. He is laying on the couch reading a book, "Scott, can I ask you something?" "Sure babe, what's up." He sits up and closes the book. "Why am I in your room?" He sighs, "I knew that was coming, you're in here because I don't trust you to be by yourself." Puzzled, you look at him "I don't get it" He sighs again, and then gets up, "You're in here so I can make sure you don't hurt yourself, that's what Vince is for too." Realization hits you and you start to get mad, you get up and walk past him. He can see the anger in your eyes and follows you. You head to the bed room and try to shut the door, but Scott is to strong. "Don't Jess, listen to me. This isn't some kind of prison, and you're not going to be watched 24/7, but if me, or Vince or anyone thinks that you shouldn't be alone, You won't be." You realize that you'd rather not be alone, you've been alone for so long. You want someone to actually care what happens to you. Sure Cory and Samantha do, but you need more than that. Besides you just can't seem to stay mad at Scott, he's done so much for you already, and he doesn't even know you. "Those are the rules Jess, you either follow them or it's back to the hospital." Knowing that you don't want to go back you agree to them. "But...what if I... I mean I don't want to but, what if I do?" "Cut your wrists again?" "Yeah," you look at him hopefully, "If that happens we'll deal with it then. Right now though I've got a show to do and you've got a show to watch, so come on." Part 3 While Scott was on stage you were down in a box area surronded by gaurds, you had a perfect view of the concert. After the concert you waited in the game room for them as they showered and changed. While you wait, you grab a ping pong paddle and play by yourself. Which is not exactly an easy thing to do! You feel a pair of eyes watching you and turn to see Vince. "Hey" you smile at him, "So were you spying on me?" He laughs "I wouldn't call it spying." He grabs a bottle of water and sits on the couch. "They put on a good show." You tell him, trying to make conversation "Just like they always do, it amazes me that Scott can walk after a show, he puts so much energy into it." "He's just doing what he loves, it takes a lot less energy because of it." You look up and stare into his eyes, my god he's cute, you think to youself. You lick your lips and convince your self it's because they were dry. Little do you know that Vince is thinking the same thing you are, my god she's gorgeous, you decide to go for it and start to lean into him. But all of the sudden the door opens and Scott walks in. He can see he interupted something and mentally scolds himself for not knocking. "Sorry guys, we're ready to head back to the hotel." You get up reluctantly and go past Scott in the doorway, he notices the look on your face and starts hatching a plan. "Vince, why don't you come by my room, Mark and Flip and some of the guys were going to come by and hang out for a while." His face lites up, "I'll be there man." During the drive back to the hotel Scott can see the regret in your face. "Why didn't I kiss him when I had the chance?" You keep asking your self, Oh well to late now. You follow Scott up to the room and flop down on the bed. "Oh no, I don't think so," Scott says pulling you up, "The night hasn't even started yet, a bunch of the guys are coming up here to hang out. So don't even think about going to bed yet." You reluctantly get up and go sit on the couch, there's a knock on the door and Scott goes to open it, it's Mark and Flip and a few guys from the crew, but you could honestly care less. There's another knock at the door, "Jess want to get that for me?" Scott asks trying to hide his smile, you roll your eyes and go get the door. "Vince! Hi," You are surprised to see him, but also very happy. "Hey Jess, I see the party's already started." "Yeah come on it." You are jumping up and down inside and go into the kitchen area to go get a soda, Scott follows and whispers "You're welcome." You look at him confused but realization hits, "You invited him!" "Well yeah." He just grins at you and goes back to join the others. Serves me right for telling him I like Vince. You scoled yourself, then remind yourself to thank Scott repeatedly. Everyone is having fun, talking and watching a movie, but you are kind of tired to you head off towards the bedroom. Scott smiles as Vince follows. You just got your pajamas on when there's a knock at the door. You open it expecting to see Scott, "Vince, hey I thought you'd be Scott telling me the party isn't over." He laughs, "Nope just me, mind if I come int?" You smile and let him in. "The party was getting boring so I though I'd come see what you were up to." You flop back down on the bed, "Well I ws just going to try out this bed, care to join me?" You turn red, that didn't come out the way you wanted it to. Vince just smiles and sits next to you, "So whats'..." Before you can say another word Vince is kissing you, you tense up and then instantly relax, you wrap your arms around his neck and pull him to you. You can feel his tounge begging for entry, you open your mouth and allow him to deepen the kiss. He pulls away gently and watches your eyes open, you smile "I've been wanting to do that all afternoon." You whisper still a little weak from the kiss. "What took you so long?" He asks, you just smile and stare into his eyes. You can here people leaving and goodbyes being said. He looks at you and kisses you softly, "I'd better go and let you get some rest, see you tommorow?" "Yeah, definatly." He smiles and goes to say goodbye. Scott watches Vince walk out of the bed room, "Well, did you finally kiss her?" Vince just grins, "I'll take that as a yes." He walks him to the door and says goodnight before going to find you and hopefully some details. "So is he a good kisser or not?" "He's very good" you sigh, you just can't seem to wipe the smile off your face. "Just don't sleep with him all right." Scott looks at you walking out of the bathroom dressed in a t-shirt and a pair of boxers. "What! What do you think I am? He's a great kisser but I really don't want to know how big his..." "DON'T say it!" Scott says laughing, "Yet" you add, Scott just looks at you surprised, then shakes his head. "What am I going to do with you?" He asks getting in the bed across from you. "I really don't know." You smile at him as he turns out the light. Part 4 You wake up in the middle of the night, another nightmare, you're sweating and you were crying in your sleep. "God I hate this" you whisper, you look over at Scott, sound asleep, "I wish I could sleep through the whole night." You sigh and grab your note book from the night stand and start to write. You must have enventually fallen asleep because you wake up when Scott takes the notebook from your hands and lays you down again. "Go back to sleep hun, it's still really early." You just close your eyes and relax again. Scott looks at your note book and starts to read what you wrote. "My life is a battle that can never be won, it is a never ending pain that will only get worse. What is my reason for living, if there is one at all. I am worthless and my time here is limited. Soon my life will end, soon I will no longer have to fight these battles." He looks up at your sleeping figure, extreme worry on his face. "How can a girl so young be so sad?" He asks hiself. He gets dressed and goes to sit on the couch, he sits down and decides to start at the beginning, he clothes your notebook. Noticing for the first time the cover, it is a picture of a girl dressed all in white walking through a dark cemetary. He opens it and starts to read more of the same. All dark depressing words from your soul, finally he comes to the end. Emotionally drained just from reading your words he puts his head in his hands and trys to think. "How can I help her?" Nothing, he can't hink of a thing, frustrated he gets up and goes back to the bedroom. He stares at you while you sleep and takes in every detail. Paying special attention to your wrists. He can see every scar, and it pains him to look at them. You start to wake up, you open your eyes and find Scott staring at you. "How can you be so sad and so talented at the same time?" You can see the pain in his eyes, it sends a sharp pain to your heart, "I don't know." Is your only answer. He looks like a little boy that has been hurt. He lays down on your bed and you hold his head as he rests. He now truly understands how deeply you hurt, how far the pain really goes, and it hurts him just as much as you. He gets up, "I'll be back in a little while." You don't ask where he's going you can tell he need to be alone. Scott gets in the elevator and heads for Marks room, he looks at his watch. "I hope he's awake." He knocks on the door and is relieved when it opens a minute later. Mark can see by the look in his eyes that something is bothering him . "Hey man come on in, what's up?" Scott walks in and sits on the couch, "I'm really worried about Jess, listen to some of this man." He reads some of your note book to Mark who sits there stund at what he's hearing. "She's really talented at writting but I know what you mean man, no one should be that depressed." "But she is, and I don't know how to help her." Mark can see how much it's bothering his friend and decides to be honest with him. "Look man, I don't think you really can help her, well not totally anyway. Rememeber in her letter, she said she knew you couldn't cure her depression. But you could help her at least make it a lot less dominante in her life?" "Yeah so, what's your point?" "My point is, make her talk about all that stuff she's written, make her explain it all so you both understand it and then see how she feels." "What if she doesn't feel any better?" Scott was getting frustrated, not at Mark, he was just trying to help, but at himself. "I don't know man, but think about it, she loves music, I mean as a last resort we could just take her with us for the whole tour." Mark says jokingly, but Scott's eyes light up, "That's it, if we take her with us, she wouldn't be alone, she could be around what she loves and I wouldn't worry about her. Mark you're a genious!" "Whoa Whoa Whoa, wait a minute Scott, what about her parents?" "Don't you think they'd want her to get better, and besides it's not like we'd be keeping her from them, she could see them whenever she wanted." Scott runs out of Marks room and to the elevator to tell you his desicion before Mark can say another word. "You are officially crazy Stapp." He thinks to himself. Part 5. You had decieded that no matter what your parents said you were staying. It didn't take much convinving, they could see you were happier and they knew you were in good hands. Your relationship with Vince has blossomed over night, now Scott doesn't have to worry about you being alone, your always with Vince. Scott had also noticed that Vince couldn't wipe the grin off his face, it had been there since the night he first kissed you. It was the middle of the after noon and the guys were in the middle of soundcheck, you're laying on a couch backstage reading a magazine when you feel someone start to rub your feet. You smile and put the magaizine down. "And just what did I do to deseve this?" You ask Vince with as smile. "Nothing, I just felt like it." "Well feel like it more often." You laugh. You sit up and kiss him hard on the mouth, he gently pushes you back down with his body. You moan as his hand caresses your neack and gets caught in your hair. The other slides up and down your waist, you can feel him untucking your shirt. He knows what the rules are and how far you'll let him go, he knows that when the time is right you'll give your slef to him. But now is not that time, for now he's content to touch you and kiss you and maybe one day make love to you. His hand goes in your shirt and runs over your stomach, you can feel him unbuttoning your jeans when the door opens. You don't think anything of it and neither does he. "Uhhhem" You both freeze, Flip is in the door way watching with an amused face. You quickly fix your clothes and sit back up on the couch. Both beet red from getting caught. "Just be glad I caught you and not Stapp. You know the rules, but if you're going to break them, at least make sure it's a safe place all right." You both nod and get out of there as fast as possible. Just as you are rounding a corner you bump into Scott, he looks at you both suspiciously but keeps going. He walks into the game room, "What were they up to?" He looks at Flip for an answer, "Just making out like teenagers do." "Tell me you did something about it." He looks at Flip angrily, "Scott calm down, I told them they know the rules and they also know the consiquenses. They won't do it again man, they know better. Besides you know Jess wouldn't let him get too far. So relax they've been warned let them be." You opt to stay in for the show tonight, Vince has to go to help set up but then he's coming back to stay with you. The show started about 20 minutes ago, Scott didn't want to let Vince go but he didn't want you to be alone so he let Vince go. Flip nods Vince over "Remember what I said all right, and be careful." Vince feels weird talking to Flip like that but doens't think to much about it. Back at the hotel Vince rushed up to your room and knocks on the door, you run to get it and as soon as you have it open Vince is all over you. You pull away just long enough to say "Hello to you to" He smiles and grabs your hand leading you to the couch. His hands are everywhere on you and you love it. You can feel him tugging at your shirt and make a very important desicioin, you start to take your shirt off, much to Vinces surpries. He just looks at you now in your jeans and bra, he can see the love in your eyes and kisses you hard. You love the feeling of his hands of your bare skin and beg for more. You feel him unhook your bra and work his way down to the buttons on your jeans. He can't believe this is happening, he was just hoping for a night alone with you not this. But he's not complaining. You lift your his to help him slide of your jeans, he looks at you again. "Are you sure about this?" You don't even have to think about it. "Yes." He kisses you will all the passion he has in him as he strips off his clothes. You can feel his desire for you and it just makes you realize you made the right choice. He stops "No not here, the bedroom." He takes your hand and leads you to the bed, he lays you down gently and starts to kiss your neck and work his way down. He takes your nipple in his mouth and nibbles it gently. You can't take it anymore and pull his face back up to yours. You kiss him hard as you feel him enter you. You take a sharp breahe and he can see pain in your eyes. "Do you want me to stop?" "No," You whisper kissing him again. It hurts but the pleasure and love you feel out weigh the pain. Together you find your rhythem and peak at the same time. You bothh collapse exahusted but hold each other tight and stare into each others eyes. "I love you Jess" You can feel the tears well up in your eyes, no one has ever told you that before. "I love you too." You kiss him passionatly as your tears fall. Part 6 At some point in time you both must have fallen asleep, you wake up when you hear the door open "Jess? Where are you?" "OMG Vince wake up!" You whisper loudly, "Mmmm what's wrong baby?" He asks not really waking up, "Vince wake up, Scott's back!" That woke him up, he looks at you "Oh sh*t my clothes are out there." He just flops back on the bed, knowing that you're both dead you just curl up next to him and pretend to be asleep. Scott opens the bed room door and stops dead in his tracks, "What the h*ll?!" He yells angrily, you jump as does Vince. "Scott!" He pretends to act surprised, "Umm hi, did you have a good show?" Scott just glares at Vince, walks back into the living room, sees his clothes, picks them up and brings them back into the bedroom and throws them at Vince "Get dressed and get lost, I'll deal with you later." He gets dressed quickly and opts not to kiss you goodbye in front of Scott. "Don't let me ever catch you again," he glares at him with his head cocked to the side watching him leave. "Scott, I..." You start to say but are cut off "Don't, talk to me right now, you're not my favorite person at the moment. I told you not to sleep with him and you did anyway." He sighs and walks out of the room, you know he's mad but was that regret behind his anger? You decide you'd better get dressed before Scott gets back, you put on a diffrent out fit hoping to avoid the whole confrontation by making him forget. You know it won't work, but give it a shot anyway. "Scott, look I know you're mad but... Scott?" He isn't in the room, you really don't want to go listen to him chew out Vince so you decide to find Flip. "Hey girly what's up?" Flip opens the door with a smile, he looks at you and can see the sadness in your eyes, you walk in past him and flop down on the couch. "All right what happend?" He asks sitting next to you, "He caught us that's what happend." Flip just nods and pulls you to him, "Let me guess you fell asleep." "Yeah, I don't care that he caught us, it's just.." You sigh trying to figure out how to say it. "It's just what hun?" Flip looks at you confused. "I swear I saw regret in his eyes." You look at him, he looks like you could blow him over with a feather. "Are you sure?" He ask finally, "Yes, I just don't get it." You sigh and sit down next to him again. "You don't worry about Scott right now, worry about Vince getting fired." "He wouldn't wounld he?" You look at him with fear in your eyes, " He knows how much I love Vince." "I don't know if he has a choice babe, if he just lets it go the other guys might try and get away with sleeping with the fans. But let me go talk to him and see what's up. He wouldn't fire him without givinging him a warning and he's never had to do that before, so you should be safe." You look at Flip relieved, "Look Jess, I know you didn't have sex with Vince just to have sex, and I know Scott does too. But.." "I know," you cut him off, "I'd better go find them." You squeeze his hand and kiss him on the cheek. "Thank you." He smiles and follows you to the door. "Any time babe." You honestly didn't know what room Vince was in, you had always hung out at the venues or in Scott's room, but walking down the hall you could hear Scott yelling. You opt to just listen right now, see if he gives any clues to the look he gave you. "Scott you know I love her man, I didn't sleep with her just for the h*ll of it. I'm not that kind of person!" Scott sighs, "I know, and I don't want to do this.... But I have to..." "Scott please no, not for me, for Jess." Vince notices his eyes change the minute he mentions your name, "You love her don't you?" Startled and not expecting to answer questions about his feelings towards you he stummbles over his words. "What, ummm I... Well, ye.... No..." "Yes you do, that's why you're so upset. God man why didn't you just say something?" "What would I say, Vince I think I'm in love with Jess, and expect you just to say ok have her?" "No man, but you could have told me." Scott sits on the couch and sighs putting his head in his hands. "Scott, she loves you too, not the same way, but I know she cares about you man. Tell her how you feel, let her decide." Scott looks at him, "You'd risk losing her?" "Yes because I know she'd pick with her heart. You know d*mn well she doesn't care that your famous or have money. It's you she cares about." Scott decides to go find you as he reaches for the door he turns to Vince. "Thanks man, and by the way, you got your warning." Vince just smiles and nods. Scott opens the door and sees you standing there stund. "Jess! Ummm hi..." "......umm I have to go.." You slowly get out, and start to walk down the hall before breaking into a run. Scott lets his head fall back "D*mn it" He whispers, "Well what are you standing here for, go talk to her!" He looks at Vince before running after you down the hall. Part 7 "Jess wait please!" He runs after you, you make it to the elevator and pray that it will hurry. It doesn't, "Jess please, we need to talk." The door to the elevator opens and you both get it. You avoid looking at him and it starts to annoy him. "Jess look at me, please." You don't turn so he does it for you. You close your eyes because you know the minute you look at him you will start crying. How can he do this to you, he know's you love Vince. "How can you do this to me?" You finally look at him with tears in your eyes. He looks at you, he doesn't know what to say. "I'm sorry, I... God I knew I never should have said anything." He turns away you can see how hard this is for him. You take his hand gently, he looks at you with hope in his eyes. "Scott I care about you....but I love Vince, I can't give that up." His head drops you can see how hurt he is, you start to smile, "but I think there's someone you should meet." He laughs "You sure you want me to meet her." "Oh yes, you'll like her. She looks like me, she acts like me too. It's Sam." "Samantha? Your best friend." "Yeah, come on." You grab his hand and pull into your room. You dial Sams number and hand him the phone. "No! Jess I don't even know her!" "Hello?" You whip the phone at him forcing him to catch it and talk to her. "Hi is this Sam?" He gives you an evil look. You just grin and leave him to talk to her. You go down to Vince's room hoping he's still there. He opens the door and looks at you with hopefull eyes. "You" that's all you have to say, he grins and kisses you with all the passion he has in him. "What happend with Scott?" "He's talking to Sam," you grin, "You're playing match maker again aren't you?" He states more than asks. "Yep, I know he'd love her, he just has to meet her." Vince just rolls his eyes. When you walk into your room a couple hours later you find Scott laying on his bed still talking to Sam. You can see just by looking at him he likes her already. You make yourself a snack and sit on the couch. Scott comes out of the bed room a big grin on his face. "Your welcome" you say matter of factly. "Don't act so smart, she's not here yet." You just about choke on your sandwhich. "What? She's coming here!" "Not here but she's coming to visit at the next stop." You get up and hug him, and kiss his cheek. "You'll love her even more in person." He just laughs and hugs you back. You don't give it a second thought when you hug him, but he does. He still loves you and loves the feel of you in his arms. He knows you'll never love him the same way you love Vince, but is greatfull for you making him talk to Sam. "What are you grinning about man?" Mark asks Scott sitting next to him, "Sam's coming," "She the one Jess made you talk to?" "Yeah, I really like her man." Mark just smiles, he's glad to see his friend so happy. He's been that way even since the day he first talked to Sam, she's been good for him. "Scott?" He heres a familier voice and jumps up, he runs to the bus door. "Hey, sorry I couldn't pick you up." He says to Sam grabbing her bag and helping her on the bus. "That's ok." She smiles at him. "So you must be the girl that's got this guy grinning like an idiot." Scott gives Mark a dirty look but Mark just pats him on the back. "I'm Mark." Sam smiles and shakes his hand. "Jess here? I did come here to see her too ya know." Shc winks at Scott and he smiles. He leades her to the back where you and Vince are sitting watching a movie. "Sam!!" You jump up and hug her. "Hey girl I missed you, we have to talk!" She looks at you and smiles. "Yes we do." You answer her smiling. "Girl talk is not allowed on the bus, either you come and talk to me or find somewhere else to chatter." Scott says trying to look sternly at Sam, but can't seem to hide his smile around her. "Oh really Mr. Big Rock Star, I think that rule will have to be changed." She is now standing toe to toe with him and they are both about to laugh when she surprises him with a passionate kiss. You grin seeing his eyes get wide and then close. Still breathless from the kiss Scott just nods his head and stammers out, "Yeah, I... I... I think that rule can be changed." "Oh go with him already he's stuttering." You tell Sam with mock annoyance. She just grins and says "I'll talk to you later Jess." You smile as she leaves hand in hand with Scott, "I told you he'd like her." "Ok you win." He smiles, glad to see Scott happy and in love. Part 8 "I"m so glad you came." Scott smiles at Sam, 'I'm nervous, I'm never nervous!' He thinks to himself, 'man I must really like her' he can't stop staring at her or smiling. "Would you stop smiling already!" She tells him trying not to smile "You're making my cheeks hurt." He laughs, "I'm sorry, I can't, you're to beautiful." Sam stops laughing and stares into his eyes, he leans in and kisses her softly, her hands go around his neck and urge him deeper. She pushes him backwords and he lays down pulling her with him. All of the sudden he gets up and stops the action. "Wait, Sam I can only do this if it's me you want, nothing else." He looks down at her, she sits up and looks at him. 'God he's gorgeous,' she thinks to herself before answering him. "Scott, I'm not going to lie to you, before I new you, yes the whole idea sounded great. But now, none of that matters, it's you I want and nothing more. The fame, the money that doesn't matter. I just want you." That's all he needed to hear. He attacks her lips with his and can't believe how good it feels to be able to do it and know there's no motive behind it from the other person. Pretty soon you and Vince can hear noises coming from the next room and just smile. "So I did good?" You ask Scott later back at the hotel after the concert. Sam is coming over and you are helping him set up a romantic night for the two of them. "Yes, thank you, and thank you for helping me tonight." You just smile at him, "You do realize though that if you break her heart, I will have to hurt you." "Yes I do, but what if she breaks my heart?" You just roll your eyes, "That won't be happening, trust me." He smiles and then shoo's you out, "Sam will be here soon, get lost." You stick your tongue out at him as he pushes you out the door. "Oh Scott, I'm going to stay with Mark tonight k?" "Thanks Jess." You smile at him as he shuts the door. "So Lover boy all set?" Mark ask when you walk in. "Yep she's gonna love it." "Thank you Jess," you look at him confused, "Here we're supposed to be helping you, and you help Scott more than you know. He hasn't been this happy in months." "That's what Sam will do to you." You shrug. "No, look he told me about the whole thing, the day when you found out how he felt about you and everything. You didn't kill him by yelling at him or pushing him away, you gave him Sam." You can't believe you're hearing this, you can feel the tears well up in your eyes, "Thank you Mark that means a lot." He hugs you and pulls you over to the couch, "What movie we watching? We got a long night ahead of us." He says laughingly. "I don't know, whatcha got?" He looks on a stand where a stack of movies sit, "Not much, oh wait, how about Remember the Titans?" "I love that movie," you smile at him. "A woman who likes a football movie, that's what I like." There's a knock on the door and you go answer it while Mark gets the movie ready and goes to make popcorn. Vince grins and kisses you when you open the door, "Hey baby, what we watching?" "Remember the Titans." He just smiles. There's a knock at the door, Scott is standing there wating for it, but counts to 5 and then opens it. Sam is standing there wearing a sun dress and white strappy sandals, she can see Scott was fidgeding with his collar and can tell he's a little nervous, even though he doesn't have to be. "You look gorgeous." He says softly, she smiles "You look amazing." She leans in and kisses him passionatly releving all his nervousness. He smiles when she pulls away, he steps aside and lets her in. "Jess helped you with this." She says matter of factly noticing her favorite flower on the table, Scott blushes "umm yeah." He smiles and so does she. "Now you know why she's my best friend." Sam grabs his hand and they both sit at the table and enjoy an amazing diner with great company. Part 9 You wake up the next morining is Marks bed, he wasn't having anyone staying with him so he only had one bed. You don't remember going there, all you remember is talking after the movie. You figure you must have fallen asleep and Mark or Vince put you to bed. You feel an arm come around your waist and try not to laugh as Mark pulls you close, "mmmm baby you smell good." You can't help but giggle at him knowing he's thinking of his girl, Anna. He wakes up and jumps when he sees you, " ohhh man I'm sorry Jess." You just smile and laugh, "It's ok Mark, it's cute," He's blushing a little and is quite embarrassed. "I'll have to tell Anna your thinking about her even when your sleeping." He turns beet red and and begs you not to tell her. "Oh Mark, she won't care, she knows you better than that. Besides she knows that neither of us would ever cheat." He nods knowing you're right but his ears are still a little pink. You just smile and throw a pillow at him "So I smell good hu." You can't help but tease him. "Don't tell Vince I said that." "He'd laugh and you know it. Besides he'd probably agree with you." Mark laughs and gets up. After you are both dressed and have eaten breakfast, you are starting to wonder what happend with Scott and Sam last night. Just to be safe you call, "mfhh lo?" A tired Scott answers the phone, "Well good morning loverboy," you smile hearing Sam ask who it is. "Jess why are you calling so early?" "Scott it's almost 11, but I was just curious how last night went, and juding from the fact I can here Sam in the backround I would guess it went well." You can here the smile in his voice, "Yeah it did." He looks over and Sam who smiles back. "I'll let you get back to your fun, but tell Sam we are talking later!" "Thanks Jess, I'll tell her, bye." You hang up and grin at Mark, "I'll bet he never went to sleep." Mark says grinning. "Jess says you're talking later." Scott says laying down and pulling her close. "She's right, but that's later," She pulls up and kisses him. He grins and pulls her on top of him, she fixes the blankets and gets settled to go back to sleep with the man she loves. "So how is he?" You ask Sam, you are sitting on the bus relaxing while the guys do soundcheck. "OMG Jess, you have no idea!" She is glowing and can't stop smiling. "Thank you so much for last night." She sits next to you and hugs you tight. "No problem babe, I'm just happy that you're happy." She smiles and leans back on the couch. "So how have you been lately?" You know what she's refering to, "They're all healed Sam, and Vince and I are good." She looks at you concered, "But?" You want to cry, you should be happy, you've got a great guy and a bunch of people that care about you, and yet you're still depressed. "Jess talk to me." She grabs your hand. You sigh, and run your hand through your hair. "I don't know, I should be happy, but.... I'm not." She sighs, "Why don't you go take a shower and relax a little, you'll be fine you just need to loosen up your muscles." "Maybe you're right." You go take a shower and try to forget everything that has been going through your head. You get out of the shower and stare at your reflection in the mirror, you can't help but hate what you see, you have bags under your eyes and you have lost some weight. You know the guys have noticed because they always ask if you're ok, and Vince is always looking at you with concern. You put on a robe and just slide to the floor, you start to sob because you just can't take holding it in any more. That's when you notice Scott's razor on the sink, "I'm sorry guys," you take the razor and cut across one wrist and then the other. Sam is getting worried it's been a while since the water shut off, she knocks on the door "Jess?" "I'm fine." You call out, 'no I'm not,' you think to yourself but don't say anything. Soon you start to feel weak, the blood is draining from your body making you tired. Sam hears the bus door open and looks at Scott with fear and concern in her eyes. "What's wrong babe?" Scott looks at her worried, Mark Flip and Vince are right behind him but she doesn't notice. She just looks at the door and then back to Scott. Scott tries knocking "Jess....." Nothing "Jess.. Are you ok?" No answer, He looks at Vince and can see the worry in his eyes, "That's it, Mark." He motions to the door and Mark helps him kick it open. Scott is the first one to see you, "No!" Is all he can manage. He is at your side hoping they're not to late. Mark wipped out his phone and is talking to the ambulance. Vince is just standing there stunned with tears in his eyes. Flip and Sam help him sit down, Sam holds him while Flip goes to help with you. He walks over to the bathroom and see's Scott ripping his shirt and tieing your wrists tightly. He looks up at Flip with fear in his eyes, he is covered in blood from trying to help you. The paramedics arrive and push Scott away, he doesn't want to leave you so him and Vince go in the ambulance with you. Mark, Flip and Sam pile in Marks car and floor it to the hospital. Part 10 A couple hours later..... Everyone is sitting in the waiting room doing just that... Waiting. Vince has been pacing back and forth worried sick, more than once he's looked at Sam and walked out of the room while she follows. Every time he comes back his eyes are red and has obvious tear stains on his cheeks. No one says anything about it, they all feel the same way. Finally a doctor walks in, he gets ambushed by all the guys running up to find out whats going on. "Where is she?" "Is she ok?" "What's going on?" They all ask at once. "One question at a time gentlemen, she's going to be fine." A sigh of relief falls over everyone. Scott just closes his eyes looks towars the celing and whispers "Thank you." The doctor looks at all of them before continuing, he recognizes them but decides now is the time to say anything. "She lost a lot of blood, you were lucky to find her when you did. I noticed this isn't the first time this has happend, but it's obvious she's in good hands. So I'll let you talk to her before I do. She's in room 112 just down the hall. You're welcome to go see her any time, normally we have visiting hours but because of the situation they won't apply to you." Vince is standing anxiously in the door way as everone thanks the doctor and heads to the door. "Scott, could I talk to you for a second?" The doctor asks. "Yeah, I'll be there in a minute guys." It doesn't even hit Scott that the doctor knew his name, he's to concerned about you right now. "I know you know this already, but I just wanted to say it to make me feel better. Don't leave her alone, if you thought it before, make sure it happens now. She is a threat to herself and I know you or the rest of the crew that's here wants to see her hurt." Scott just nods and heads to your room. He sees everyone but Vince outside, he looks in the window and sees you both crying and you apologizing. A little while later Vince comes out, Scott imediatly goes in before anyone can say anything. You are laying in bed just waiting for it, you knew he'd be next. You're expecting to be yelled at, but insted he walks in sits on your bed picks you up and holds you. "God don't you ever scare me like that again." He whispers in your ear, you start to cry and he holds you tighter. "I'm sorry Scott, I'm so sorry.." "Shhhhhhhhhh you have nothing to be sorry for, you can't help how you're feeling. That's why I'm here, and that's why you WILL talk to me when you fell like this or I will tie you to a chair until you do." You can't help but laugh a little, you know he's right you should have talked to him. "There that's better," he lifts your head up an looks at you. "Up for more visiters?" You nod kowing that they are probably dieing out there. Scott opens the door and they practically plow him over."Let us in man." Mark says pushing him out of the way. "Hey girly" he smiles at you and goes over to hug you, "Don't you ever do that again" he whispers in your ear while he hugs you then kisses your cheek. Next Flip comes over and whispers as he hugs you"As soon as you get out of here, we need to have a talk." You just nod to both of them and hug Sam. "I'm so glad you're ok Jess." She tells you honestly, you can see she's mad but you know she won't say anything.Vince sits next to you and holds your hand tight. You can see the sadness in his eyes and it hurts you to look at him. After a few hours the guys decide to go get something to eat and let you rest for the night. They all hug you goodbye and give you the 'we will talk' look. It's an all to familier look, you know they care about you but you dread having the up coming conversations. A few minutes late Flip walks back in, "We're having that talk NOW," you can see he's angry and you don't blame him, you just look down and let him get it off his chest. "How could you do this Jess? You claim to care about us, but then you go and do this!" He starts to pace and runs his hand through his pretty much non exsitant hair. "Do you have any idea what we went through today, Scott looked like he was about to cry, Vince WAS crying and Mark and I were trying to figure out what the h*ll we were going to do if...." He stops knowing he shouldn't say it. "If what Flip? If I died! What do you think I wanted to happen!" "NO Jess no, don't say that, NEVER say that. I don't care how depressed you are, that is NOT going to happen, we love you too much to let that happen." You can't help the tears that are streaming down your cheeks, "Of all the people in the world why would you want to love me?" You say through sobs, Flip stops and looks at you, "My God Jess, do you have any idea how beautiful you are? You are so amazing, you deal with feeling like this everyday and yet you are so talented. You've done it all, sing, act, dance, you are an amazing writter. There is nothing more amazing and beautiful than a strong talented woman, and you are it." "No I'm not," you look at him tears still streaming shaking your head. "Yes you are, why do you think Vince loves you so much? Because you have been through h*ll and yet your still here, you're here for a reason Jess. What I don't know, but I know you're here for a reason." He takes you in his arms and rocks you back and forth whispering comforting words in your ear and laying his head on yours. You cry yourself yourself to sleep, he lays you down in bed and kisses your cheek. He doesn't notice that Mark came back up to get his coat he left out side your room. He heard the whole thing and smiles slightly leaving, 'Flip is right Jess, please listen to him' he thinks to himself while waiting for the elevator to go get some grub. Part 11 The doctor wanted to keep a couple of nights to make sure your wrists were healing good. Because of that Creed had to cancell a show, you told Scott not to, but he said he wasn't leaving you especially not now. Now it begins, suicide watch, you hate it so much, you can't do anything alone. You know it's only to help you, but it never helps. You thought maybe Scott would be different and not inforce it, no luck. He actually hired Sam to watch you 24/7, she didn't mind because you are her best friend, and she's worried about you. Scott finally had a yelling match with you after you were out of the hospital, you were both angry and hurt by the end of it. Sam made sure to never let you out of her sight after that. She knew how much it hurt you to have Scott mad at you, but she also knew that Scott can't stand being mad at you either. Soon Scott was pacing out side the bus figuring out a way to apologize when you step out and just hug him. "God I hate being mad at you." He says into your hair, "I know, I hate it too." He just holds you tight and prays that you get better. You open your eyes and see Mark standing not to far off, he waits for Scott to let go and go in the bus before he comes over to you. "I think we need to have out little talk now." "Mark please I"m..." "No arguments Jess." He puts his arm around your shoulder and pulls you along as he goes to take a walk. "Look Jess I know you hate this whole suicide watch thing, but it's not going to change.You know why, and I know how much Scott worries about leaving you alone. He's put his relationship on hold so he can help you, Sam and him temporarly broke up because she knows he's so worried about you. You're all he cares about right now. Sam knows that and so does everyone else, once you start to get a little better Sam will be back in the picture for Scott." You knew he was worried about you but you didn't know that Sam and him had "temporarily broken up"! "Mark what do you mean they temporarily broke up?" "Just that, right now they are both so busy worring about you they don't have time for each other. So insted of everntually getting mad at each other, they decided to deal with everything first and once it's settled down they'll get back together ." You can't believe they broke up because of you, Mark can read your face and stops, "Look at me Jess, they love each other, and they are getting back together, just not right now." He puts his arm around you again and continues walking "Why did you do it? That's the one thing I haven't asked you." You look at him, you can tell by his eyes he has to know. "Because I hate life..." You say quietly and start to walk again, he stops you. "Why?" "Wouldn't you after all the things I've been through?" He looks down at the ground. "I don't know Jess, I wish I did," He wraps his arm around you once more and you head back to the bus. Part 12 You climb in the bus with Mark behind you, Scott and Sam are laying on Scott's bed talking, you know it's about you because they stopped the minute you walked in. You decide to lay down and head to your bunk. A few minutes later Vince climbs in the bus and looks for you, he sees you laying down and lays down behind you, he kisses your head and wraps his arm around you tightly.You turn to him and he can see the tears stains on your cheeks, he kisses you gently and pulls you on top of him holding you tight. You start to cry into his chest, he just holds you rubbing your back and playing with your hair. It kills him to see you like this, he tries not to let on but all the guys can see it. They know what he's feeling and want to help him, but.... They don't know how. Eventually you both fall asleep, show time arrives and Scott sees Vince still asleep holding you, he writes him a note. 'Take the night off man.' He knows that ever since the hospital Vince hasn't really slept, it's obvious. Vince hears the bus door close and wakes up, he carefully gets out of your bed and sees the note on the table. He starts to head to the door but sees another note taped to the door, 'If I see you anywhere near the stage you're fired. Get some rest! -Scott' he can't help but laugh at it. "All right man I can take a hint." He sits down and sees another note on the tv, 'there that's better!' His laughter wakes you up, you walk over to him and read the note. You give him a confused face and he shows you the others, you laugh and remind yourslef to thank Scott later. You cuddle up on the couch next to him and get ready to watch the movie. You both fall asleep during the movie and don't hear the bus door open, "Scott man get a camera," Mark whispers to him getting in the bus, Scott grabs one from his room and smiles taking a couple of pictures of you two. They just stand there watching you two sleep for a minute before deciding to play video games. You wake up to fighting.. "No way man I beat you by a mile!" Mark and Scott are on the floor wrestling with each other when they notice you're awake. "Hey Jess, sorry we didn't mean to wake you up." Mark looks at you sheepishly. "I don't believe you." You tell him with raised eyebrows. You try to look serious but it doesn't last long. They pull you down and start to tickle you, you are laughing hysterically and wake Vince, he just smiles and joins in. After a little while everyone decides it's time for bed, you go into the bathroom to change and try and lock the door. Then you remember Scott had the lock taken off, he also hid anything and everything that he could think of that you could possibly cut yourself with. You actually have to ask for your razor when you take a shower and even then there's a time limit. None of the bus doors have locks on them any more, the only exception is the main doors. You told him he was over reacting, he just gave you this 'you're kidding me' look. You come out of the bathroom and climb into your bunk. You lay down on your stomach and start to write in your journal as always. Soon you hear Scott walking over to you, "What do you want?" You tease him "Hey watch it." He smiles at you, "Let me see," "Scott do you really have to do this every nigh?" "Yes," he looks at you sternly. You hold out your wrists as he checks to make sure there are no new scars. "All right, get some sleep." He kisses your cheek and goes to bed himself, Sam right behind him. You roll your eyes and smile, they may be "temporarily broken up" during the day, but they sure aren't at night. Part 13 Later that night when everyone's asleep you go into the bathroom, you open your compact and take out the razor blade you have hidden behind the mirror. You are so depressed still, but you know if you cut your wrists again Scott will find out right away. But if you cut your thigh, he wouldn't dare look. You feel bad about doing it, but you just can't help it. You sit down and make another cut righ under the one you made a few nights ago. You try not to do it, and if you can you don't, but some nights you just can't help it. The next morning Scott is in the bathroom trying to reach something under the cupboared when he knocks over some of your make-up. It hits the floor and sighs and turns around to pick it up when he notices the mirror in your compart is loose. He starts to fix it but notices something shiny behind it. He pulls the mirror out and sees the razor, there's blood on it. 'God Jess, you can't do this.' He fixes your compact, finishes his routine and walks out of the bathroom. He looks at you, "You, we need to have a little talk." You just look over at Sam confused, she shrugs and pushes you to go talk to him. He pulls you into the bathroom, which you think is weird, then he pulls out the razor. Scott watch your mouth open and your eyes flash fear, "Mind telling me why the hell I found this hidden in your stuff?" Your face changes to anger, "Why the hell were you looking in my stuff?" "I wasn't, I was looking for some asprin when I accidently knocked over your make-up bag, I thought I broke the mirror so I was fixing it, that's when I found this." He holds up the razor again, "So, we come back to my question, what the hell are you doing with this?!" You don't answer you just stand there thinking of what to say to him. He sighs, "Let me see them." "What are you talking about?" He just looks at you angirly "You know damn well what I'm talking about." That's when he notices what you're wearing, and it hits him, right after you got out of the hospital you wore a tank top and boxers. Then all of the sudden you started wearing this huge oversized t-shirt with boxers. He lifts up the shirt and sees all the scars on your thighs, his head drops and his hands immediatly run them through his hair. "God dammit Jess, you're killing me," the minute he says that, that old Fugges song pops into your head... Strummin' my pain with his fingers, singing my life with his words, killing me softly with his song.... "Jess are you listening to me?" Scott practically screams at you. "Yes, sorry, I just.." "What? Thought of another excuse for cutting yourself insted of talking to me??!" You're starting to get mad at him, "God Scott NO, would you just shut up!" You walk by him, he just stands there stund. Mark, Flip, Sam and Vince were all sitting on the couch listening when you came out, the bathroom isn't exactly soundproof. You just walked by them and went to your bed, you flop down and start to write Scott, what you want to tell him you just can't see to say. "Scott, Look I'm sorry I didn't talk to you, God knows I wanted to, but you have no idea it is for my to talk to someone. I'm so used to every little thing that comes out of my mouth being critisized. I can't talk about this, but I can write it. Why? F*ck if I know (sorry, you can yell at me later) I just... I can't help it ok. I know I shouldn't do it, you have no idea how much I know. But it's so hard, I can't handle it sometimes. I know I know, then come talk to you, but I can't. I know you somewhat understand this, but I know it's hard for you. I know how you treat people you're close to, I can see that it hurts, you try to hide it but it's obvious that you're in pain. God I hate seeing you like that, and it hurts worse because I know I'm the cause of that pain. Sometimes I wish I could just get in a car and drive away from everyone, then you could just forget about me and go on with your lives. Love you, Jess" You fold it and put it on his bed, he stormed of the bus after your confrontation, he was just so mad that you wouldn't talk to him. He doesn't realize how hard it is for you, so that's why you wrote him, which is what you should have done in the first place. No one dare talk to him, they knew better than to try and talk to him when he's angry, but Mark followed him to make sure he didnt' do something stupid. Sam was sick of sitting there so she decided to go find him, while Vince and Flip went to see what happend with you. Mark and Sam find Scott sitting on the stage writting furiously, Mark nudges Sam. "Go talk to him." She just looks at him, "Why don't you?" "'cause he'll bite my head off right now, besides you know Jess better than all of us, and besides you're prettier than me." She smiles at him and kisses his cheek. 'Anna's a lucky girl,' she turns her attention back to Scott 'and so am I' she thinks to herself . She walks out on the stage quietly so she doesn't disturb him, then squeezes his shoulders, they are hard as rocks. He looks up at her mixed emotions running through his eyes. She sits next to him and looks at what he's writting, from the looks of it, it's a song. "I just wish she'd talk to me." Scott says looking at Sam, she nods. "It's hard for her, she can talk to a complete stranger easily, but someone she cares about is..... Hard." "But why, she knows I love her and don't want to see anything happen to her." "Yeah she does, that what makes it so hard, she hates seeing the people she loves in pain, especially when she's the cause of it." She gets up and leaves to let him think about what she said. Meahwhile... "Guys please just leave me alone.." "No," Flip answers sitting down next to you on the bunk. You just give him a dirty look., Vince starts to rub your back, "Talk to us.." You give him the same look, "Hey don't look at me like that," You just start to cry Flip decides that Vince is the one that should be talking to you, so he gets up to go find Mark. "Come here baby," He holds you tight and you just sob into his chest. "How can you love me?" You ask through sobs, "You know why I love you! You are so amazing, you have dealt with feeling like this everyday and yet you are still here. You are so talented and beautiful you can do anything and it will be a succsess. You are real, you don't hide who you are." "Yes I do, everyday." You sob, "You don't have to, you have so much to live for if people only knew you like we all do they couldn't help but love you." That just makes you cry harder. Scott had walked in and seen and heard your whole conversation with Vince. He decided to let you rest before talking to you. Then he notices something on his pillow, he picks it up and realizes what it is. He reads it and smiles slightly, 'Sam knows her better than she knows herself.' He finds an empty notebook and decides that he will write to you from now on instead of trying to talk. Now that he knows how hard it is for you he wants to give you a way to talk to him without actually talking to him. He finishes his letter to you and puts it on the little stand next to your bunk, Vince is laying with you holding you as you fall asleep. He looks at Scott and smiles a little. Once Scott's gone he picks up the notebook and reads what he wrote. He smiles knowing that it will help you a lot and reminds himself to thank him later. Part 14 Vince decides he'd better go to bed before they start moving to the next town, he also knows you'll wake up some time tonight so he leaves the notebook on the table next to your bed. He knows you'll figure it out, so he just tucks you in and kisses you gently on the lips. A few hours later you do wake up and notice something on your table, you sit up and see a notebook. You open it up thinking Vince wrote you a note saying he was back on the tech bus but instead find a letter from Scott. "Jess, I'm sorry I tried forcing you to talk to me, I had no idea that it was so hard for you. I just wish you had written to me sooner, I love you Jess, you know that. I don't want to see anything bad happen to you, you have no idea how hard it is to see you with scars everywhere. I know you can't help it, you've told me, but...... It will always be hard to see them. So here's the deal instead of talking to me face to face write me in here. This will be our own way of talking without actually talking, k? I hope you write me, I don't want to see you get hurt again. I love you, Scott" You smile reading his letter, it will be so much easier to talk to him this way. There is so much that you have wanted to tell him but couldn't because you couldn't talk to him. Now it will be so easy to tell him everything. You get up to see if any one else is awake, you start to head for Scotts room but hear the all to familier noises coming from behind the door. You laugh and head back to bed, you lay down and are just getting settled when Mark peeks in. "Hey you, can't sleep?" You smile at him, "No, you know I never sleep the whole night." He nods, "Wanna talk?" You scoot over so he can lay down with you, "Sure, hope in." He climbs in next to you, as he climbs in he sighs "I wish this tour was over, I miss Anna." You smile, "I know you do, but I can tell when you're thinking about her." You smile, he smiles and gets the goofy look on his face that he gets when thinking of Anna. "That's the look," he snaps out of it and looks at you. "Hu?" "You get a cute look on your face when you think about her." He starts to blush a little, "God Mark, when it comes to Anna you blush constantly." He nods "I know, I can't help it." You just smile, "So what are you going to do once the tours over?" "Go home, relax, ask Anna to marry me." He answers casually, your eyes go wide and you smile,you hug him making him fall out of the bed. "Mark why didn't you say anything sooner!!" He just shrugs 'Guess the right time didn't show up yet." "Well have you....?" He reaches into his jeans pocket and pulls out a little black box, he hands it to you "I should get a womans opinion anyway. If you don't think she'll like it tell me so I can find one she would like." You carefully open the box to reveal a beautiful platinum band with diamonds embedded all around, engraved inside it is 'to my Anna, I will love you forever, you will always have my heart- Mark' you get tears in your eyes, "Mark it's beautiful, she'll love it." You hand him the ring back, he can see the tears and can tell it's not just from looking at the ring. "What's wrong babe?" He asks putting the ring in his pocket. "It's nothing" you tell him looking away hiding the sadness in your face. He turns your chin towards him, "Talk to me hun." You look at him as a tear falls down your cheek. "It's just......nothing" He pulls you closer and makes you look at him, "If it's making you cry it's not nothing." Mark notices you spining the friendship ring on your index finger that Cory gave you years ago. "I see what you're thinking." He takes your hand and moves the ring from your index finger to your ring finger, "You're wondering if that will ever happen aren't you?" You smirk and nod slightly. "And what makes you think it won't?" You just look at him "Who would want to marry me?" He smiles, "That's easy, Vince." "Mark I love him but the chances of him asking me are slim to none, and besides what would I do if he did. How could I choose?" Mark is obviously confused, "Why would you have to choose anything?" "Mark I love Scott just as much as Vince. He hasn't stoped loving me either, although he won't admit it." Mark just looks at you surprised, "I can tell when he hugs me he still loves me, he holds me so close and he is always smelling my hair. And just the look in his eyes when he looks at me, it's always this regretful look. He still loves me Mark." Part 14 Vince decides he'd better go to bed before they start moving to the next town, he also knows you'll wake up some time tonight so he leaves the notebook on the table next to your bed. He knows you'll figure it out, so he just tucks you in and kisses you gently on the lips. A few hours later you do wake up and notice something on your table, you sit up and see a notebook. You open it up thinking Vince wrote you a note saying he was back on the tech bus but instead find a letter from Scott. "Jess, I'm sorry I tried forcing you to talk to me, I had no idea that it was so hard for you. I just wish you had written to me sooner, I love you Jess, you know that. I don't want to see anything bad happen to you, you have no idea how hard it is to see you with scars everywhere. I know you can't help it, you've told me, but...... It will always be hard to see them. So here's the deal instead of talking to me face to face write me in here. This will be our own way of talking without actually talking, k? I hope you write me, I don't want to see you get hurt again. I love you, Scott" You smile reading his letter, it will be so much easier to talk to him this way. There is so much that you have wanted to tell him but couldn't because you couldn't talk to him. Now it will be so easy to tell him everything. You get up to see if any one else is awake, you start to head for Scotts room but hear the all to familier noises coming from behind the door. You laugh and head back to bed, you lay down and are just getting settled when Mark peeks in. "Hey you, can't sleep?" You smile at him, "No, you know I never sleep the whole night." He nods, "Wanna talk?" You scoot over so he can lay down with you, "Sure, hope in." He climbs in next to you, as he climbs in he sighs "I wish this tour was over, I miss Anna." You smile, "I know you do, but I can tell when you're thinking about her." You smile, he smiles and gets the goofy look on his face that he gets when thinking of Anna. "That's the look," he snaps out of it and looks at you. "Hu?" "You get a cute look on your face when you think about her." He starts to blush a little, "God Mark, when it comes to Anna you blush constantly." He nods "I know, I can't help it." You just smile, "So what are you going to do once the tours over?" "Go home, relax, ask Anna to marry me." He answers casually, your eyes go wide and you smile,you hug him making him fall out of the bed. "Mark why didn't you say anything sooner!!" He just shrugs 'Guess the right time didn't show up yet." "Well have you....?" He reaches into his jeans pocket and pulls out a little black box, he hands it to you "I should get a womans opinion anyway. If you don't think she'll like it tell me so I can find one she would like." You carefully open the box to reveal a beautiful platinum band with diamonds embedded all around, engraved inside it is 'to my Anna, I will love you forever, you will always have my heart- Mark' you get tears in your eyes, "Mark it's beautiful, she'll love it." You hand him the ring back, he can see the tears and can tell it's not just from looking at the ring. "What's wrong babe?" He asks putting the ring in his pocket. "It's nothing" you tell him looking away hiding the sadness in your face. He turns your chin towards him, "Talk to me hun." You look at him as a tear falls down your cheek. "It's just......nothing" He pulls you closer and makes you look at him, "If it's making you cry it's not nothing." Mark notices you spining the friendship ring on your index finger that Cory gave you years ago. "I see what you're thinking." He takes your hand and moves the ring from your index finger to your ring finger, "You're wondering if that will ever happen aren't you?" You smirk and nod slightly. "And what makes you think it won't?" You just look at him "Who would want to marry me?" He smiles, "That's easy, Vince." "Mark I love him but the chances of him asking me are slim to none, and besides what would I do if he did. How could I choose?" Mark is obviously confused, "Why would you have to choose anything?" "Mark I love Scott just as much as Vince. He hasn't stoped loving me either, although he won't admit it." Mark just looks at you surprised, "I can tell when he hugs me he still loves me, he holds me so close and he is always smelling my hair. And just the look in his eyes when he looks at me, it's always this regretful look. He still loves me Mark." Part 15 You get up and go sit on the couch leaving Mark on your bed stunned. "Why didn't you say anything, and what about Sam?" You put your head in your hands, "I don't know, I don't know what to do!" Mark gets up and sits next to you, "You have to talk to him." "Mark I can't, I mean what would I say??" "Just tell him the truth, or here," He hands you the notebook, "this will spare both of you." You stare at the notebook, Mark wants to leave you alone, but knows he better not. You open the notebook thinking of what to say. "Scott, I don't know how to say this, but I know, I know that you still love me, I love you too. I'm so confused, I love you and Vince so much, I don't know what to do. I don't want to hurt either of you, I'm so confused. I love you but I love Vince, I can't just pick one of you, you know I can't stand to see anyone I love hurting, that's why this is so hard. I don't know what to do.. I love you. Jess" You put the notebook under his pillow, you don't want to risk Sam seeing it. You can't bear to think that you might lose her too. You decided to go and find Flip to try and take you mind off things. You find him in the game room playing ping pong with one of the techs. "Hey Jess, what's up?" You force a smile so you don't have to talk about what's going on. "Nothing, mind if I play?" "Sure babe." You start to play, all of the sudden the door opens, "Hey man what's up?" Flip smiles at him, Scott ignores him and walks up to you, he takes your face in his hands and kisses you as hard as he can, your eyes opens wide and then close, you can't help yourself. You hear the door slam open and see Vince standing there fuming. "Get your hands off her." He growls, shooting daggers at Scott. Scott looks like he is about to say something but before he can Vince stalks up to him and starts punching him. Scott doubles over and falls to the ground, he gets up and starts to fight back. Flip rushes over to them and tries to break it up, you just stand there stunned, your chin starts to tremble and tears start streaming down your face, Flip looks at you confused as you run out of the room. Both Scott and Vince jump up to go after you, but Vince glares at Scott, he pushes by him and goes to look for you. "What the hell was that man?" Flip looks at him totally confused. "And don't say nothing," Scott sits on the couch rubbing his soar chin, "She's in love with both of us man." "What! What do you mean she's in love with both of you man?!" Scott just looks at him "Just that man" Flip sits down stunded. Meen while.... Vince has been frantically searching for you everywhere, he finds you hiding by the equipment cases on the stage crying. "Jess, baby what's wrong?" You get up and try to get away from him, you just really want to be alone right now. "Jess, talk to me." He stops you and turns you to him, "Hey what's wrong sweetie?" You turn your head as the tears start to stream down your face again. Vince reaches up and wipes them away, you look at him, you can see all the love for you in his eyes. That just makes you want to cry twice as hard. "I.... I just need to be alone that's all." You walk away from him slowly, he watches you leave a worried look on his face. Part 16 You walk away from the stage trying to find somewhere to think alone. You walk around aimlessly, crying and trying to figure out what you are going to do. You finally just lean against a wall and collapse. The sobs rack your body as you sit your knees pressed to your chest, you look up and run your hands through your hair. "God, why do you do this to me?" You don't see Vince standing not to far away, he is standing there tears in his eyes praying for a way to help you. He debates with walking over to you but decides against it. He watches you for a few more minutes before leaving, it breaks his heart to see you like this. A little while later you get on the bus, still crying, you walk right by all the concerned faces looking at you and collapse on your bed. Vince kneels next to you and gently kisses your lips. You open your eyes and look at him, he can see all the pain in them and wishes he could just kiss it away. He climbs in the other side and wraps his arms around you, you turn to him and he pulls you closer. You kiss him passionatly and lay on his chest, "I want to show you something." He whispers quietly. He starts to kiss your neck and slowly undresses you. Every time you tried to help him, or say something he would just silence you with a kiss. He carresses every part of your skin with such a gentle touch it makes you cry. He makes slow passionate love to you while carressing you softly, and whispering how beautiful you are. You can't help but cry as he brings you to climax. He pulls you on to his chest and holds you close the whole night. Another town another show, you have been trying to avoid Scott, as much for his sake as yours. You decide to go check out the stage and ask one of the tech guys if you could borrow a mic. He says sure and watches you walk up on the stage, you sit on the edge and feel compeled to sing the song that's been running through your head. Feels Like Home Something in your eyes, makes me want to lose myself, makes me want to lose myself in your arms. There's something in your voice, makes my heart beat fast, Hope this feeling last for the rest of my life And if you knew, how lonely my life has been And how long I've been so alone And if you knew, how long I've wanted someone to come a long, And change my life the way you've done It feels like home to me, it feels like home to me It feels like I'm all the way back, where I come from It feels like home to me, it feels like home to me, It feels like I'm all the way back where I belong A window breaks, down a long dark street And a siren wakes in the night But I'm all right 'cause I have you here with me And I can almost see Throught the dark there is light And if you knew how much this moment means to me And how long I've waited for your touch And if you knew how happy you are makin' me I never thought that I'd love anyone so much It feels like home to me, it feels like home to me It feels like I'm all the way back, where I come from It feels like home to me, it feels like home to me, It feels like I'm all the way back where I belong It feels like I'm all the way back where I..... Belong All of the sudden a pair of arms wrap around you, you jump then realize it's Vince, he hugs you tigh as you start crying again. Neither of you notice Scott in the wings, he wanted to go out to you but saw Vince and figured he'd better not, he wants to be the one hugging you, he wants to be the one that makes love to you, frustation fills his eyes as he watches you and Vince on the stage. Then he is startled by Sam, "Scott? Oh there you are, I need to talk to you, alone." Puzzled he follows her, "Scott, I love you, and I'm doing this because I love you. Scott, we have to break up." He looks at her surprised, "It's so obvious that you love Jess, I know you didn't fall in love with her on purpose and I know that you're frustrated right now, that's why I think it's best if I'm out of the picture." She starts to walk away but he stops her, "Sam, I'm so sorry, I never wanted this to happen." "I know Scott, but it did, I can't make you stop loving Jess, and I never would. I still want to be friends if that's ok?" Scott can't help but smile, "God you are amazing," Sam grins "Yes I am." They both laugh and go to find something to eat. Part 17 Vince is still holding you while you cry your eyes out, he knows Scott loves you, and he knows you're battling with your slef to decide who you love more. He can only hope it's him. You start to get up and he follows, all of the sudden you start to get drizzy. You stop and close your eyes for a minute. "What's wrong babe?" Vince can see by the look on your face something is not right. "It's nothing, I just need to eat something that's all." You hope you sounded convincing, you start to feel better and open your eyes when you collapse. Vince jumps and catches you, "Jess! Jess wake up, talk to me!" He kneels next to you to see if you're breathing. That's when he notices a small trail of blood, one of your scars ripped open. You're still breathing so he runs to get help, one of the tech guys uses his cell phone to call the ambulance. The guys are all in the game room when they hear the sirens, they all run up to the stage and see you lying there, Vince is next to you trying to wake you up. Scott runs up to both of you and drops to his knees "What happend??!" "One of her scars ripped open, she didn't notice I don't know how long it's been bleeding." By now the ambulance is there and the orderlies are moving you on to a strecher. Vince tells them what happens as they rush you to the hospital. He knew you hadn't done it on purpose so he wasn't in quiet a rush. Flip offers to drive him though. "No it's ok man I don't need a ride." Flip just looks at him like he's crazy. "I'm driving you, that's it." Once they're in the car Flip can see the worry in Vinces eyes, he can't sit still throughout the drive. "Calm down man, she's going to be fine," Vince looks at him "I know it's just............the thought of loosing her is..." " I know man, but you're not going to all right, you will NOT loose her." As he's driving he's hoping his words aren't a lie. He screaches to a hault in front of the hospital and makes Vince go find out what's going on while he parks. Mark and Scott pull in next to him. They all run in and see Vince running for a waiting elevator, they catch up to him and ask what's going on. He answers before they can even ask, "She still getting blood, but she's going to be ok." They all sigh with relief as they relax and catch their breath. You had enough blood pumped into you right away that you had woken up, so they had it put in by and IV. You are sitting in your room waiting for the ambush to arrive. The door crashes open and everyone rushes in, you can't help but laugh at their hurry. Vince and Scott are at your side and it hurts you to have both of them gripping your hand, the look doesn't go unoticed by Flip and Mark, they look at each other and wonder what's going to hapeen. You see them looking at each other and know what they're thinking, "Scott can I talk to you a minute." You look at him and squeeze Vinces hand hard to let him know you love him. Everyone leaves and waits out in the hall hoping to here the conversation. You turn to Scott, you can see the hope in his eyes, "Scott I haven't decided, I honestly don't know how I can, I love you both so much, this is killing me to have to chose between you!" Scott feels like he's just been punched in the gut, "I know Jess, I'm sorry, I just.......I can't help it." You can feel the tears well up in your eyes, he looks at you "God Jess please don't cry, I can't stand to see you like this." "Then help me, how the hell am I supposed to choose between you and Vince!!" "I don't know....." Part 18 Mark, Flip, and Brett are all waiting in a small room backstage.. "What are we doing back here man?" "Vince said he has to ask us something and made me promise not to talk to Stapp." Mark says shrugging. The doot opens and Vince comes in, he looks really nervous about something. "Ummm guys I have a favor to ask, but I have to try and talk to Stapp too. But....ummm....." "Come on man spit it out!" Flip smiles at him, "Do you think this is too much?" He pulls out a little black box from him pocket, all of the guy's mouths drop and slowly turn into grins as they see the ring. "Vince you dog! When did you decide this!!" They all ask at once, he can't help but laugh, "Remember the day she was singing on the stage?" They all nod, he blushes remembering.. "Well the night before that." They laugh and hug him, "But wait," Mark asks, "What do you need us for?" Then it hits him, "Oh man, Stapp will kill you," "I know dammit," he turns away frustrated, "Let me talk to him." Mark pushes out of the room before anyone can stop him, he finds Scott in his usual place all alone. "Hey man, can I talk to you?" Scott turns to him and smiles, "umm I have to ask you something," Scott can see he's battling with something in his head, "Anything man, what's up?" Mark looks up "It's about Vince man," imediatly Scott's face goes dark, "No man, please, listen, he wants to do something that I know and you will know when I tell you, will make Jess happy." Scott looks at him confused "He's going to ask her to marry him Scott," His mouth drops and his eyes get a hurt look in them. "Scott he wants to ask her during the concert, man please let him do this." Scott sighs and looks at Mark, "Get him in here." "Can I trust you to be alone with him?" "Yes just get him in here." Mark goes to get Vince and stands outside the door to make sure nothing happens. The tension in the room is almost to much to handle. "Look Vince, I'm sorry about all of this, I never ment to fall in love with Jess, and I wrecked a good thing because of it." Vince knows he's talking about Sam, he wants to say something but knows to let Scott finish. "I know how much she loves you and I would never stop you from marrying her.....As much as this hurts, my answers yes.." "You mean....... I can ask her tonight?" "Yes, I just want her to be happy, she's happy with you, any idiot can see it." Vince can't believe what he's hearing, "Scott I... I don't know what to say....Thank you." "Just make sure she says yes, that's what I want, now go try and calm down and I'll take care of everything else." Vince is a nervous wreck waiting for his cue in the wings. Scott forced you to watch the show tonight, you figured he just wanted to be able to see you and not have any tension there. You finally gave in and he dragged you to your spot, you noticed you're right by a set of stairs and wonder why, but once the show starts you forget all about them and have fun. All of the sudden right in the middle of a song he stops everyone... "Hold up guys hold up... I got a request from a very good friend of mine tonight, he said you have to help me out man. You know my girl friend loves you guys and I want to do something special for her. So.... Vince the floor is yours." At the name Vince your eyes just about pop out of your head. The security gaurd next to you puts a hand on your back and gently pushes you up the stairs. Vince is standing in the middle of the stage with a rose in his hand. "What are you doing????" You whisper frantically, "Just this." He whispers back, Scott hands him his mic and stands back hoping and praying you say yes. Vince gets down on one knee and you imidiatly start to cry, "Jess, I love you more than anything, you know that. I can only hope you let me love you for the rest of our lives, will you marry me." He pulls out a beautiful platinum band with a huge diamond in the middle. He looks up at you, you can see how nervous he is, you look at Scott, he just nods and looks towards Vince. You smile at him and whisper "Thank you" he smiles back, you look down at Vince and smile, "Yes." He jumps up and picks you up off the ground and spins you around. You can't help but laugh, the whole audiance cheered when you said yes. Vince puts you down and kisses you passionatly before walking over to Scott and hugging him. "Thank you so much man." Scott just smiles "There's a limo waiting out front, get her and get out of here." Vince just rolls his eyes, when Stapp does something he goes all the way. Vince grabs your hand and heads to the waiting limo.... Part 19 The limo driver is waiting and smiles when he see's you comming.he opens the door to reveal a large interior, there is a couch along the back, next to it a bucket with some champange chilling in it and two glasses next to it. You don't really notice the music until you both sit down and cuddle up next to each other, It's When a Man loves a Woman, "He really does think of everything doesn't he?" You look up at Vince smiling, "Yeah he does, Hey man where we going?" He ask the driver, "I'm not allowed to say, Mr. Stapps orders, but I know that you will love it." You are in Florida so you know Stapp has connections so you aren't worried about where you are going. The driver pulls up in front of Floyd's, he helps you out and you look at him puzzled. He just smiles and tells you to go in. You walk in hand in hand, the minute you walk in a waitress seats you at a table and brings you a big plate of spaggetie and meatballs and a note, 'Ladie and the Tramp, sorry man it fit.' You enjoy a perfect dinner, you can't stop smiling and looking at your ring. That's when you notice the place is empty, you were to enthraled with Vice to even look around. You hear the front door open and hear people talking. Soon Scott walks up the steps, you run up to him and hug him tightly, "Thank you so much, you have no idea how much this means to me." He hugs you back and kisses your cheek. "Yes I do, and you deserve it, he's a great guy, Jess, listen to him ok." He looks at you seriously, "I will, I promise." He smiles "Well then lets get this party started, come on!" As soon as he says that Pinks Get This Party Started starts playing, "You really did plan everything didn't you." "Yep, now lets party." The rest of the night is spent partying and watching Flip get drunk, "Hey Jess, me thinks you should marry me!" You laugh at him as he slurs his words and forgets April is sitting right there. She just laughs and helps him in the booth. She turns to him "Now hunny, would you really give this up?" She kisses him and he immediatly grins. "Soooorrry Jess." You roll your eyes and get up to see where Vince went. You see him at the bar talking to Scott, you come up behind them and grab Vinces hand. He doesn't even turn around he just smiles and squeezes back. "I love you." You whisper in his ear, Stapp just rolls his eyes at you. "What? You have a problem with it, leave." Vince almost chokes laughing and Scott looks at you surprised and then laughs. You dance the night away with the guys and feel happier than you have in a long time. Finally around 3 in the morning you and Vince decide it's time to go, Scott comes up to you and tosses a hotel card in front of you. "The limo will take you there, Sam packed both your stuff, go relax, enjoy, use room service as much as you want." You look at the card and see it's for the Hilton, "Wait Scott who's paying for this?" "Not either of you, so don't worry about it." He gives you the 'no more questions look' and walks away. You get in the limo and relax on the way to the hotel. You get in the elevator and realize you don't know what room you're in, Vince just takes the key and puts it in the slot to head to the penthouse, it works. "It's Scott, what else would he get." You laugh because you know he's right. You get to the door and when you open it there is a bunch of roses on the counter from the gang, "We love you, have fun! How do they do all this so fast?" You shake your head and go check out the other rooms.There are candles lit in the bedroom and music playing already, you know Vince didn't do it he didn't have time, "Scott wants us to have a lot of fun." He grins. You bite your lip and turn away blushing, Vince smiles and turns you to him "Now don't you run away from me," He lifts your chin and kisses you, "You're so beautiful." He whispers and pulls you to the bed. Soon you making passionate love to each other, he holds you close as you fall asleep. Part 20 The next morning you wake up to the phone ringing, You reach over a sleeping Vince and grab it. "Stapp what do you want?" He laughs, "How'd you know it was me?" "You gave us the room, besides who else would be calling us?" You can hear him smiling, "Are you having fun?" You smile "Yes, but I was going to ask you, how long did you rent it for?" "As long as you want, I just told the manager I needed the penthouse and where to send the bill." "Which is where, by the way?" You ask knowingly, "Yes Jess I'm paying for it, now enjoy yourself....." "Scott," you cut him off, "Yeah Jess?" "Ummmm..." "Jess what is it?" You can hear the concern in his voice. "Why did you do this, I mean...." "Jess I did it because I know how much you love him, and because I love you so much. He makes you happy, any idiot, including me can see that. He has loved you from the moment he met you. I didn't mean to fall in love with you, I hated myself for comming inbetween you. I really like Sam and I want to try and work things out with her. Don't worry about me, I will always love you, and I will always be here if you need me." "Thank you so much Scott, I love you too, I always will." "Now enjoy yourself and don't worry about a thing." You smile, "Bye Scott," "Bye Jess, don't wear him out too much." You laugh and hang up, you lay your head down on Vince's chest and relax, he wraps his arms around you and pulls you close in his sleep. Meanwhile............ "You did the right thing man," Mark is comforting Scott, "I know, and I know she loves him more than she knows. It's just hard...." "I know man, being away from Anna kills me, but I know she loves me, God I love her." Scott smiles at him, "I just hope I can work things out with Sam, I really like her and..." "She's good for you man, why don't you talk to her?" "I think I will." He gets up to go find Sam, he had invited her over with the guys and a few other people. He finds her in the studio downstairs talking to Flip. "Hey bud, what's up?" Flip asks him smiling, "Nothing man, having fun?" Flip nods and lifts his beer, Stapp rolls his eyes and smiles at him. "Sam can I talk to you?" "Sure Scott." She follows him to the sound proof booth and sits while he starts pacing. "Sam I really like you, you know that.........and..." He stops and stands before her "I want to give it another try." She smiles at him, "Scott, I know you still love Jess," His heart sinks, "But, I know that you aren't just doing this to try and get over her, so ............I'd love to." He grins and picks her up in a hug. She turns towards him and kisses passionatly. "I love you Scott Stapp." "And I love you Samantha Shuel." Part 21 You got a call from Scott later that day, telling you about what happend with him and Sam, he sounded so happy. The phone rings and you run to answer is "Lo?" "Jess it's Sam, how's the penthouse?" You can here the smile in her voice, "It's beautiful but that's not what you really want to know is it?" She laughs "No, have you even left the room?" "Nope, and I don't think we will." You laugh, you really hope you don't. "So how's Scott?" "He's great, and so am I?" "I"m so happy you two worked things out." "Jess thank you so much for making him call me that day. I really do love him, I can only hope he feels the same way...." "Sam, trust me, he does, just give him time." You know he does love her, he just needs time. You hear some noise in the kitchen "Hey Sam I gotta go, I'll talk to you soon?" "Yeah babe, have fun with your man." "You too hun." You hang up and go find Vince. He's in the kitchen making a sand which. You walk up behind him and wrap your arms around his waist and rest your head on his shoulder. He smiles and turns around in your arms. He leans down and gently touches your face, your eyes close at his touch, he lifts your chin and captures your lips in a soft kiss. His hand goes to your neck and pulls you closer to deepen the kiss. Your arms wrap around his neck and hold him as close as you can. "What would I do without you?" You whisper in his ear, "You don't ever have to wonder," He holds you close his hands on your back holding you as close as he possibly can. "I will always love you, don't you ever forget that." He whispers while holding you tightly. You feel a tear roll down your cheek as you turn your head into his neck. He puts his head on yours and just holds you. You look up at him and can't believe how in love with him you are. You never in your entire life thought that you would feel like this. You break away from your embrace to let him eat his food and relax, he smiles and lets you go. You go back into the bedroom and take out your notebook, you got the urge to write while in his arms. You had an idea for a song and have to write it down, the title came out right away, "Come What May" You decide to call Scott for help on it, and to see what he thinks. "Scott, I have to ask you some thing." "Sure babe what's up?" "Well I wrote something and need your help." "Read it to me." "Well actually I want to record it, but I want it to be a duet." "I bet Vince would do it." "No see I want to record it for him, he can't know about it." "Well what's it called, or don't you konw yet?" "It's called Come What May, I really want to do this Scott." "It's no problem babe, you're a great writter, I know it'll be great I just want to hear it before I do anything." "I know, when can I come over?" "Anytime babe, just say when." "When." You go out and see Vince asleep on the couch, you smile and leave him a note on a table next to him. It seems like forever until you pull up in front of Scott's house, he opens the door with a smile and brings you down to his basement studio. You just hand him your notebook and sit on the couch. He sits on the piano bench and starts to read what you wrote. When he's finished he looks at you, "Wow, this is really good babe, I don't think you need my help on it." "Not writting it, but recording it." "I'll get Mark, I can't exactly record it and sing it at the same time." "Not that talented are we?" You tease, he sticks his tongue out and flips you the bird before going to get Mark. You sit at the piano and start to play what you hear in your head, you start singing the words you wrote down. You don't notice Mark and Scott have come down, they just stand there stund listening to you sing it with such passion and soul. You finish and notice movement out of the corner of your eye, you jump and look at them. "Don't scare me like that," you laugh. Scott sits down next to you and starts to sing the song, just as you heard it in your head. Pretty soon you have a basic track laid down and listen to the play back. "Come What May" Never Knew I could feel like this Like I've never seen the sky before Want to vanish inside your kiss Seasons may change winter to spring But I love you until the end of time Come what may Come what may I'm will love you until my dying day Suddenly the world seems such a perfect place Suddenly it moves with such a perfect grace Suddenly my life doesn't seem such a waste It all revolves around you And there's no mountain to high, No river to wide Sing out this song and I'll be there by your side Storm clouds my gather and starts may collide But I love you (I love you) Until the end (Until the end) of time Come what may Come what may I'm will love you Come what may Come what may (Yes I will love you) Come what may For I will love you Until my dying day Part 22 You and Scott get a finalized compy done within an hour, and you rush back to the hotel. You open the door and turn to shut it, that's when you feel arms wrap around you. "And where were you hmmmm?" "No where, just making something for you." "Oh really, and what were you making?" "This," you hand him the cd, he looks at you confused, "Just listen to it.' He smiles and kisses you taking the cd, he goes into the living room and puts on the cd, you hear him turn it on then you hear someyhing you didn't know about, "Hey man, she really loves you bud.." You hear Scott's voice and smile. The song starts to play, you go lay down on the bed, you know he'll be in soon, and you're tired from recording it. Vince listens to it, and then he listens to it again. He walks around the penthouse looking for you, he finds you asleep on the bed. He lifts you up gently and helps you under the blankets before laying next to you. He pulls you close and holds you tightly as he falls asleep. You wake up a few hourse later warm and comfortable in his arms, you turn over and lay on his chest, as you nuzzle your head against it you feel eyes on you. You look up and see he's awake, "Did I wake you?" You ask quietly, "Yes, but I'm glad you did." He pulls you up and kisses you hard, you smile feeling his desire for you. He rolls you over so you're on your back, and starts to take off your clothes, you just lie there enjoying his caress. You stay in bed the rest of the day, talking, making love, laughing, and just enjoying being together. You never thought in your entire life you would find someone who could actaully make you happy, and now you have. You can't believe how many people worry about you now, you hate it sometimes. Just when you think you can just relax and not think about anything, someone will come up to you and ask if you're ok. You know it's because they care, but Scott and Vince are the only ones that seem to realize that you just need to be alone sometimes, so they let you. You hear a knock on the penthouse door, you reach for a robe abd go answer the door. There stands Scott, he breaks out into a smile when he sees you in the robe you just roll your eyes and let him in. "Hey I didn't want to bother you, just was curious what he thought of the song?" You smile at him, "He loved it, thank you." He reaches out and hugs you "Hey no problem hun, I'm just glad he likes it." He lets go and puts his hand on the doornob, "I'll let you go back to bed" he winks and goes out the door, "Bye Scott" You laugh shuttint the door behind him, then for the thrid time today you feel arms wrap around you. "God I love when you do that" You tell him turning around in his arms, "I love doing it" he puts his forhead on yours and just stares into your eyes. "God I love you, more than you will ever know." You smile, "I love you too, now lets go back to bed." You take his hand and start to head for the bedroom when all of the sudden you feel sick to your stomach..... Part 23 You rush to the bathroom Vince hot on your heals, and make it there just in time. You collapse on the floor exahusted, but feel a little better. Vince went to get you some water and crackers, he sits down on the floor next to you, you lay back aginst him and relax. You sip the water and eat a few crackers, until you start feeling better. "What happend hun?" "I don't know, I just felt sick to my stomach." He helps you lay down for while and falls asleep next to you, you go downstairs to the near by drug store and pick up a pregnancy test. You hadn't felt like that before and were certain you knew what it was. You head back up to the room and take the test, you sit anxiously in the bathroom waiting for the timer to go off. Vince reaches out in his sleep to pull you closer and discovers where you were laying is cold. He gets up and notices the bathroom door slightly closed. He knocks lightly and peeks in, just as the timer goes off. "What's that?" He asks opening the door and seeing the test. "You know what it is." You get up and go to look at the test, "Well what's it say??" He asks impatiently, "I'm pregnant" You look at him wondering what his reaction will be, his face breaks out into a huge grin as he hugs you and spins you around. You can't help but laugh at him, he lets you down and kisses you passionatly, before running to the phone. He calls everyone he knows, you just stand there arms crossed shaking your head at him. He just grins and keeps talking, finally he hangs up the phone, "You realize nothing is certain yet, I still have to go to the doctor." "Yeah I know, but I know it's right." You smile and reach for the phone to call the doctor. Your appointment is late that afternoon, you are just about to leave when Vince takes the keys from your hand. "I'm driving." You look at him surprised, "You don't have to come." "I know that, I want to." He drives you to the hospital and anxiously looks at a magazine as you check in and wait to be called. He's taping his foot impatiently and it's annoying you, "Calm down hun, you're driving me crazy." He stops and continues to page through a magazine. Finally your name is called, Vince jumps up and walks with you down the hall to your room. You get into the gown and sit on the table, the doctor comes in and does the usual checking "You know what's next" she smiles as you go do your thing. She looks at Vince and can see how anxious he is. She just smiles at him as she waits for you to get back. You come back quickly and hop up on the table again. She tells you she will be back in a few minutes and leaves. You are just starting to get impatient when she walks in again, "Congratulations Jess, you're going to have a baby." Vince jumps up and hugs you tightly, he pulls away with you still in his arms, "I'm gonna be a dad..." "Yep, and I'm gonna be a mom," you smile as he kisses you. The doctor quietly left after telling you the news, she could see how happy you both were and that made her smile. Part 24 You both decided to tell the guys in person, so you went over to Scott's house. You ring the bell and hear little footsteps, Jagger opens the door, "Hey bud." You smile at him, he grins and hugs you "Jessie!" "Jagger who is it?" Scott asks comming to the door, he smiles when he sees you both, "Hey guys whats up?" He invites you in. "Well.....are Mark and Flip here too?" He nods, and leads you to the living room where they were all hanging out. "Hey look who decided to leave the hotel room?" You stick your tongue out at Mark and sit on the couch, "So what's up guys?" Scott asks sitting in a chair across from you. "Well," you look at all of them, you have their complete attention, "I'm pregnant" you say your eyes scanning each one of their faces, Mark and Flip both start to break out into grins, they rush over and hug both of you. Scott is still in shock and you are afraid he will be hurt by the news. But insted he runs out of the room and grabs Sam, "Jess is pregnant," he says smiling, "What!!" Sam runs out and hugs you tightly, "Jess!! I'm so happy!" Scott hugs you holds you tightly, "I hope it's a girl and she looks just like her mom." He whispers in your ear, you smile at him. After the big hug fest Mark declared that is was time to celebrate, he fires up the grill and starts making burgers. The girls run in the kitchen and started to whip up some potato salad and whatever else they can find. The guys all sit on the couch making cracks at Vince about becoming a dad, but it's obvious everyone is happy for you both. "So have you guys set a date for the wedding yet?" Flip asks him, "We wanted to wait until the tour was over, and now that it is, I'm guessing sometime soon." "Does she want the whole huge churchh wedding or what?" Stapp ask hoping you don't want a huge wedding. "No, she just wants something small, friends and family, that's about it." They all nod, "She doesn't want to spend a fortune on it, thank God!" He laughs. You over heard them and walk in to the living room giving him a mock glare, "So what if I did want to spend a fortune?" You ask sweetly sitting down next to him playing with his hair. "Ummm you'd get it." He smiles, "Yes I would, good boy." You kiss him and you both laugh, you walk back into the kitchen to help the girls some more. "Man you are so whipped." Scott laughs, Flips cuts in "I remember a time when someone else was quite whipped himself." He looks at Scott smiling, "Yeah but that was then this is now, leave me alone." Flip looks at Mark "No" Part 25 The burgers are just about ready so you and Sam start to fix the picknick table on the deck. The doorbell rings and Mark runs to answer it, "Hi baby." He hugs and kisses Anna pulling her inside. She wraps her arms around his waist and follows him out back. "Hey Jess," She hugs you as you put the potato salad on the table. "I'm so happy for you two." You look at her like 'how did you know?' She just smiles "Mark called my cell phone while I was coming here, now where is he?" You smile and point to the living room, she goes to say hi to everyone else. You finish setting up the food and go get everyone from the living room. "Food's ready," You practically get plowed over by Flip and Scott as the jump up to go eat. Mark follows with Anna on his arm and stops to take Sam too. "Well at least one of you is a gentleman" she smiles at him and then Anna, "Yeah, I trained him well." You all laugh as they go get food. Vince gets up and pulls you to him, he kisses you passionatly and holds you tight. "You are so beautiful, I can't believe how lucky I am." You wrap your arm around his waist and walk to the deck to go eat. "It's about time you two showed up." Scott teases grabbing a fork. You roll your eyes and grab a plate, when you feel something, "Hun what's wrong?" Vince looks at you with concern in his eyes, every one stops and looks at you, you feel it again and smile, you grab Vinces hand and put it on your stomach. He smiles feeling the baby kick, everyone goes back to eating, they are relieved you have been doing so good, Scott especially. Sam and Anna motion you over to sit by them as they start to chatter abotu weather or not it's a boy or a girl and everything they can think of. You start to feel a little tired and go find Scott to ask him where you can lay down, "Are you sure you're ok?" He asks opening the bedroom door, "Yes I'm fine just tired nothing's wrong." "Ok, you can sleep in here and no one should wake you up." He goes back outside and looks for Vince to let hi know where you are. "Is she ok?" "Yeah she said she's fine just tired is all." "Thanks man." Vince gets up and goes to find you, he sees you asleep on Scott's bed and crawls in next to you. He wraps his arms around you tightly and holds you while to sleep. "God I love you," he whispers before gently kissing your lips and going to sleep himself. The guys noticed you were missing, so they went to look for you both, they found you and went to go get a camera. They start taking pictues, you just hug Vince closer. Part 26 The guys all walk back into the living room and let you sleep. "He's totally whipped" Flip says laughing, "And you aren't?" A female voice comes from the front door, it's April, " Mmmm baby you look hot." Flip smiles walking over to his wife, she hugs him and kisses him passionatly Scott and Mark walk over and hug her, she smiles and and hugs back. "So where's the happy couple?" She aks looking around, "Asleep in Stapps room, Jess was tired, and where Jess goes he goes." Flip smiles relaying the story what happend. "Now just why did you take pictures of them?" April asks eyebrows raised. "It's a surprise for something," Scott says putting the camera on the table. April eyes him some more but can tell he has something planned. A few weeks later..... "How about this one?" You ask coming out of the changing room of the bridal shop, Sam April and Anna are sitting on a couch being your judges. The dress you have on is a strappless off white gown. It has gold trim on the fitted top. It is actually two pieces but looks like one. You turn to them and see their mouths drop, you laugh "Ok by that reaction I think this ones it." They all nod furiously. Before you change you take one last look at yourself in the dress and smile. You come out of the dressing room and a sales lady smiles taking the dress to hang it up while you pay for it. The girls all look at the price and look at you surprised, "That's really resonable Jess, man I wish I could've found that great of a dress for that price." April says pouting, then laughs "You finish paying and turn to them, "Now it's your turn." You grin and go to your favorite place to find the perfect dresses. You pull up in front of the shop and all the girls jump out excited about getting new dresses. As you are all looking around for dresses, "Ok Jess I'm going crazy, who's your maid of honor?" They all look at you questioningly, "I'm leaving that up to you guys to decide, I love you all, I can't chose." They all look at you stund, "Jess you have to chose, you're the BRIDE!" "No, I'm not chosing," You tell them stubbornly, so they all go off in the corner while you keep looking for dresses. You find a beautiful purple dress that you are sure they will all like, when you hear them come back. "Ok Jess, we decided," April says looking at Sam, "Sam has known you the longest and you've been best friends forever, so we all agreed she should be your maid of honor." You smile at them, "I had nothing to do with this." Sam chimes in throwing her hands in the air. You all laugh and then you lift up the dress, "What do you think?" They inspect it carefully before asking how much it is. You show them the price tag, "God Jess you're comming shopping with me next time, how do you find such good prices." "You just have to know where to look." You smile and hand them the dresses. They all go try them on, you sit on a bench and relax, they all come out relativly at the same time. You just sit back, cross your arms and smile, they all look gorgeous, they all love the dresses so you go with them and pay for them. "There that's my important stuff, now lets go home girls." You try not to grin as you drive towards Anna's house knowing the surprise that's waiting for her. Part 27 As Anna walks up the side walk she can't stop wondering why you dropped her off first. She was out of the way of the others, and it was just strange to drop her off first. She opens the door and sees a trail of rose petals, curious she follows them. As she is walking down the hall she sees they split into two, one path leading upstairs and one leading to the dinning room. The one leading upstairs has a sign by it that say 'not yet' so she follows the path into the dinning room. When she pushes open the door she sees a beautiful site. The table is set with two clear crystal plates a delicious meal of spaggeti on them, candles lit everywhere, and a dozen red roses in the middle. Mark walks in with a bottle of champange and two glasses. He smiles at Anna, "Well what do you think?" She just stands there amazed, "Mark it's beautiful, but why?" He gets a serious look on his face as he sets the the champange down. "Well I wanted to ask you something," He looks up at her and can see she knows already. "Mark you're not.......are you?" She asks questioningly, he pulls a the black box from his pocket and kneels in front of her, tears immediatly fill her eyes and her hand goes to her mouth. "Anna, you know I love you more than anything, I wanted this to be perfect so I even had Jess give me her opinion." He says opening the box, she gasps and can't help but smile as the tears flow. "I love you Anna, will you marry me?" He looks up at her with hope filled eyes, "Yes, yes a thousand times yes!" She hugs him tightly and pulls him up. He holds her and grins "You've just made me the happiest man alive." He tells her kissing her passionatly. A few minutes later Mark is calling Scott and the guys to tell them the news. "Lo?" Scott answers "Hey man," Mark answers calmly, "Don't even start, what happend?" Mark just smiles "I'm engaged man." Scott grins and turns to you, Vince, Flip, April and Sam, "She said yes." you all smile. "So you comming with us to help Vince out man?" Scott asks "Yeah I'll meet you guys there." The guys all kiss their girls goodbye and go help Vince pick out his tux. While the girls stay in and pick out music the guys go with Vince to get fitted for their tuxes. "I never thought I'd have to wear one of these again." Scott says as the sales lady helps him with his coat. The guys have slightly different tuxes than Vince's, but for the most part are the same. "Well what do you think?" Vince asks turning to them, "I think you should tell us who your best man is." Flip says fixing his coat. Vince looks at him and smirks, "I was wondering when you'd say something." They all look at him, he looks like he really doesn't want to hurt any of them. "Look man we don't care who you pick, we're not going to be mad, jeez we're not women!" Scott practically yells. They all laugh but Vince shakes his head "I'll tell you leter ok?" Satisfied they all go back to making sure their tuxes fit right. As Vince is paying for the tuxes they guys head out to the car, "Mark, I gotta talk to you." Vince says looking up. "Yeah man what's up?" Mark asks walking over to him, "Would you do it?" He asks quietly, "Do what man?"Mark looks at him confused, "Be my best man." Mark is stunned but smiles, "I'd be honored man." They hug and Mark follows him out to car. Flip and Scott figured it out right away so now they had one thing on their minds, bachelor party. "So Vince, how many strippers you want?" They all tease, he rolls his eyes and laughs at them. "Look I don't care what you plan, just as long as I'm not drunk for my wedding, I want to remember it all righ?" They all nod, and grin at each other, "This is going to be fun." Mark grins. While the guys were gone you had tried listening to CDs and finding songs that would be good, but you didn't come up with much. That's when it hit you, "Do you think the guys would mind playing?" April, Anna, and Sam look up, "I doubt it Jess, in fact I bet they'd love to." You smile hoping they're right. Just then the guys walk in talking about the bachelor party. "Man I think we need at least 30 strippers." You just laugh, knowing them, they'll just go hang out somewhere drink, and make fun of Vince. But even if they do throw a party you don't care, and you know he doesn't either. "Scott can I talk to you?" You ask getting up from the pile of CDs around you, "Shure babe." You walk into the kitchen and grab him a beer. "What's up Jess?" You sit down and relax, "Would you play at the wedding? I've been looking and looking through CDs and I know now that I don't want some dj playing crap at my wedding." Scott smiles at your remark and takes a sip of beer. "Well?" You ask impatiently, "Hey guys get in here," Scott yells through the door way, they walk in and lean against the wall, "We just got another gig." Scott smiles, "Where?" Mark asks confused. "Jess and Vince's wedding dork." Scott says giving him a 'duh' you laugh as they grin. "Cool man," Mark smiles at you, you smile back. "Thank you so much." You smile hugging them all. "Hey no problem, any special song we need to get ready?" You look at Scott surprised, "No, no, you're doing enough as it is." Part 28 It's the night before the wedding, you are at home wating for the girls to show up for your bacheloret party, you told them no male stripper, just a chick party. They thought that sounded like fun, they are bringing sleeping gear so they can stay over and help you get ready. Vince is out with the guys doing God knows what, you don't want to think about what Scott would plan. The door bell rings and the girls plow in before you can answer it. "Hey Jess, ready to party?" Anna asks you grinning, you laugh and help them with their stuff. Soon you are all pigging out on food, watching chick flicks, sleeping bags are everywhere, it's a total girls night in. Vince on the other hand is out on the town with the guys, they go to a few strip clubs, the guys drink a bit, but Vince wants to stay pretty sober for tommorow. For the most part it was just them hanging out, but Scott insisted on buying him a lap dance, "Come on man, Jess knows you're not going to do anything, just one?" Scott is relentless so finally Vince just gives in, Scott buys Vince and himself one, although it's clear to Flip and Mark that Scott enjoys his a lot more. By the end of the night they are all a little tipsy but not too bad, by morning they will all be back to normal. Vince is staying at Marks house so he won't see you until tommorow morning. As Mark is about to head upstairs he stops and turns around again. "Why'd you pick me man?" By the look on his face it's obvious he is genuinely curious, "Because you stopped Scott from killing me and you're my friend." Mark smirks, "If he killed you I would have gotten my ass sued, I had to man." They both laugh, "What did Scott say?" Vince asks "He just said you made the right choice."Mark turns and goes upstairs to bed while Vince goes to the guest room. The next morning....... You get up bright and eary to start getting ready, you can't stop smiling and the girls all tease you about it, Anna does your hair, while April and Sam do your make-up and nails. Finally it's time to put on the dress, they help you zip up the back and fix it so it's perfect. You hear the limo pulling up so you turn around. The girls are dressed, ready and crying already. "God you guys don't make me start" you say laughing, you all hug and head outside. Scott insited that you arrive in style. Mark knocks on the door and peeks in to find Vince a nervous wreck, just like he thought he would. "Hey man, calm down, everythings going to be fine." Vince turns around and smiles at Mark, "I know man, it's just, I've got this weird feeling somethings going to happen." Mark laughs "Yeah somethings going to happen man, you're getting a wife." Vince rolls his eyes but before he can say anything the door bell rings. Scott and Flip walk in dressed and ready to roll, "Come on guys lets get this show on the road." They walk out to Scotts car and head to the beach. The is a huge tent set up on the beach and an area for the ceremony already set up. You got there before the guys to have pictures taken so now it's their turn. They take a few serious pictures, but the rest were fun and crazy. You had told the photographer just to have fun, you only wanted a few certain pictures so she did. Guests start arriving and it's getting closer to the ceremony, everyhting is almost set. The guys take their places, there is a beautiful sky behind you. The music starts to play and Vince looks up to see you at the end of the isle. He immediatly locks eyes with you and you smile. So far everything has been perfect, but that weird feeling hits Vince again. "And if anyone has any reason why these two should not be wed, let them speak now or forever hold their peace." Mark and Flip both squeeze Scott's shoulders praying that he won't screw this up. Mark looks at him with a 'don't you dare' look. Scotts eyes are hard no emotion showing, he looks down and away from Mark, but doesn't say anything. "I know pronounce you husband and wife, you may now kiss the bride." You turn to each other, "God I love you" Vince whispers before kissing you passionatly. Everyone except Scott is grinning as you walk down the sandy isle. Part 29 You and Vince walk arm in arm to the tent and get the party underway. Everyone follows and the guys climb up on the stage that was built. Mark can see somethings eating Scott and he thinks he knows what it is. "Scott come here." Mark calls him over to a corner and decides to be direct. "You love Sam right?" Scott looks at him confused, "Yeah, why?" Mark stares at him trying to think of the nicest way possible to tell him, "Then do yourself a favor and talk to Jess, it's so obvious you still love her man, both you and Sam are going to get hurt if you don't talk to her." Scott nods, and decides he'd better find you. He see's you in a crowd of people talking and laughing. "Umm Jess, excuse me, could I talk to you for a minute." You nod and say be right back to your guests. He leads you outside the tent and a little ways away. "Jess I'm sorry about this, but I can't help it, you know I would if that was possible." You look at him confused, "Scott what are you trying to say?" He turns to you "I love you Jess, and not just like part of the family, I want to be in Vinces place right now." You weren't expecting this at all, "I..I need to sit down." Scott quickly grabs a chair from by the alter. "I'm sorry Jess," You can see how frustrated he is with himself, "Scott why didn't you say anything, I mean after you and Sam got together I thought...?" He runs his hand through his hair as he starts pacing "I do love her, but I love you too, God this is so f*cking hard, I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said that." You get up, you both have tears in your eyes, you know how hard this for him. "God Scott, you know I love you, but..." At the word but, you could see his heart breaking, that only makes you cry harder. "Please don't do this to me Scott." He looks into your eyes, "I should just leave," he turns and starts to walk away. "No, Scott you can't leave, I want you here, and you made a promise to me, you promised you'd play." He looks back at you and can see you mean what you say. He walks back and hugs you tightly, "I don't know if I'll ever stop loving you like I do, but I'll try." He whispers in your ear, "That's all I can ask for." You answer pulling him tighter to you. You fix your make-up and walk back in the tent with Scott. Vince looks at you and can see you were crying, he glares at Scott wondering what he did to you, but before he can confront him Scott hops on stage and starts to jam. They play all you're favorite Creed songs, in fact they play all of them. The night is coming closer to and end and you figure that Creed will be winding down their set when a familier melody hits you. You look up to see Scott starting to sing Come What May, you notice Amy in the corner waiting for her cue. You look at Scott and mouth 'thank you' he just winks as he sings his heart out. Scott decided to tell Sam everything that had been happening, he told her how much he still loved you and about the bachelor party. He was surprised when she just rolled her eyes after telling her about the lap dance. "Scott is was a bachelor party, I was expecting that, now if it was a regular day, your ass would be grass." He can't help but laugh, "Scott I know you love Jess, you're not the best at hiding it. But I know you would never come between her and Vince. She loves you too, and she wants you in her life, you wouldn't be here if she didn't." She sighs, "I'm not helping this either, you need some time to figure out what you want, and if I'm a part of that. I will be housitting for Jess and Vince if you want to find me. But take you're time Scott, trust me, I'll wait for you." She kisses him softly on the lips before saying goodbye to you and Vince. Part 30 The party is winding down so Mark grabs Anna and whispers "I think there's another trail of rose petals at home that need to be taken care of." He grins at her and wiggles his eyebrows, she laughs as he leads her over to say goodbye. "Sorry Jess, gotta have some fun with my man too." You laugh as you hug her goodbye, "Don't do anything I wouldn't." She grins and follows Mark out of the tent into the night air. Scott Flip and April are really the only ones left so you start walking around, cleaning up. You look up and see a distant look on Scott's face, before he puts his head in his hands. "Hey, what's wrong?" You ask sitting next to him, he proceeds to tell you the whole story about him and Sam and everything that went on. You listen carefully and watch him carefully. "What am I supposed to do Jess?" He pleads with you, "that's up to you Scott, but I know Sam, she will wait." After you walk away Vince sits down next to him exhausted. "I'm glad that's over." Scott just nods, "Why was Jess crying?" Scott looks up surprised he didn't even think Vince knew anything. He sighs, "It's my fault, I still love her, I would never intentionally do anything to come between you guys. I love you both, but I can't help how I feel." Vince is stuned, he gets up from the table and walks away. Scott instantly regrets telling hi, "Vince, get back here man, God I knew I never should have told you." Scott gets up running his hands through his hair. "I'm sorry man, I never wanted this to happen, I should just leave." Scott turns to the door and starts to walk away, "Scott what about Sam?" Vince asks making him stop, he sighs and turns around. "I don't know yet, we broke up so I could think about what I want, I love her, I really do." "But?" Vince asks knowing there is one, "As much as I try I can't keep my mind off Jess. God I'm sorry Vince," Scott looks like he's about to cry so Vince doesn't push him anymore. "I know you love her man, and I know you would never do anything to hurt either of us. You just told the truth, I admire that." Vince hugs him before talking to Flip and April. You walk over to Scott and sit down next to him again, "Scott how is this going to effect our friendship?" "It won't Jess, I won't let it, you two are my friends and I'm happy that you're happy together. I know how happy Vince makes you and I would never come between that." "You make me happy too Scott." He smiles, "Yeah but more like a brother and sister kind of happy righ?" You smile at him, "Yeah, and I wouldn't trade that for anything, how could I not love my big bro." He laughs and you hug. You are the one to squeeze him tight this time, he will always have a part of your heart. Part 31 April and Flip decide it's about time to leave, they say goodbye and tell you to have fun on your honeymoon, you asure them you will and hug them goodbye. You and Vince head out to the limo waiting to take you home, your honneymoon starts tommorow, you are going on a two week cruise of the carribean. Scott had already left, he said he was tired but you knew he wanted to see Sam. You and Vince finish cleaning up and head home for the night. You get out of the limo and walk down the path towards the house, you reach the door and are about to go in when Vince picks you up and carries you. He kisses you passionatly as you are going up the stairs to the bedroom. "So you can't even wait until tommorow hu?" You tease as he lays you on the bed, "Nope, and neither can you." You blush and laugh because he's right. "I'm not going to get any sleep tonight am I?" You smile at him, "Nope, now where was I..." While you and Vince were busy at home Scott went over to Sam's place. He rings the bell but no one answers, he figures she's asleep so he tries knocking. "Sam? Are you home, I need to talk to you." This wakes her up, she crawls out of bed in her pajamas, which she forgot was a pair of Scott's boxers he left once and one of his t-shirts. "Who is it?" She says groggily walking to the door, "It's me, Scott." She opens the door surprised, "Scott what are yo...." Before she can get another word out, Scott's hands are every where and he has her locked into a deep kiss. She tries to pull away at first but loses the battle and allows him to have his way. Finally he pulls away, "I love you, and I want you in my life more than anything, I know that now, I never ment to hurt you, I'm so sorry, can you ever forgive me?" She stands there stund a minute, before answering him by kissing him even harder than he kissed her. He smiles as she kisses him, "God I love you" he whispers in her ear, she grins knowing that it's finally completely true. "I love you too Scott." When you wake up the next morning you go downstairs to make breakfast and see something on the dining room table, you walk over to it and see it's a nice matted board with pictures of you and Vince printed on it, there is a note attached, "This is a little belated wedding present, we thought you would like a little look at what we all see when you two are together. So here it is, enjoy." You sit down and start looking at all the pictures, you see one from the day you fell asleep in Scott's bedroom and tons of others that you had no idea were taken. You smile and lean it against the wall so you remember to have it framed. Seven Months Later......... "Get this thing out of me!" Vince can't help but laugh, "Hey you did this to me, so stop your laughing." You are in the delivery room about to give birth, while the rest of the gang is in the waiting room. You hear a knock on the door, Scott peaks his head in "She hasn't broken your hand yet?" He asks looking at Vince, you glare at Scott, "Uh oh the death glare, only one conclusion, she's pregnant." You pick up your pillow and throw it at Scott. He laughs and kisses your cheek. "How ya doing babe." You glare at him, "How does it look like I"m doing?" He laughs, "Like any other pregnant woman about to give birth, pissed off at men." You nod, then laugh, "Well I'll leave you alone, I was voted to come check on you, see you late guys." You tell him goodbye and feel another contraction, "OW, damnit do these things ever end." Vince smiles and sits next to you. Pretty soon you are in labor and ready to kill Vince and every other male on the planet. "Almost there hun, almost there."Vince whispers to you holding you as you push. What you really want to do is whack him upside the head, but decide against it. "One more push will do it." The doctor tells you as you push as hard as you can. "It's a girl" the doctor smiles as you collapse on Vince. He is grinning and kisses you softly. Ten minutes later you are in your hospital room holding your little baby girl while Vince went to get the gang. There's a knock on the door and you smile as you here the guys outside talking. "Come in," you smile as Scott, Sam, Mark, Anna, Flip, April, and Vicne all walk in. They are grinning, "Looks like we got another little kiddo in the family." Scott grins at you, "Would you like to hold her?" Scott grins even bigger and gently takes her from you, "Man you look just like your mom, cutie." You laugh as she gets passed down the line and know you're going to have no trouble finding a babysitter. That's when you notice Sam's hand, "Samantha, is there something you want to tell me?" You ask crossing your arms over your chest, Scott imideatly blushes, and Sam proudly displays her finger for you. You grab her hand, grin and hug her, Scott starts to slowly head to the door hiding his red face. "Get your buns back here," He smiles and turn around, you just look at him waiting for an answer, "He asked me last night Jess," Sam finally does it for him, "What can I say I realized what I might lose, so I made sure that didn't happen." He shrugs and you grin. You are finally happy with your life, and everyone else has finally been able to see the real you. The End.