"NOT TO WORRY"
Time passes by, sometimes in a hurry,
Our thoughts, our family, but not to worry.
Sometimes you feel sad, happy, or all alone,
But not to worry, there's a second home.
Our beliefs, our feelings, we keep within,
But it all comes out when we think of him.
The way he laughed, his love, his face,
But not to worry, he's in a better place.
He's gone forever, you think, 'what to do?'
But not to worry, he's always with you.
He might be gone, but we're always here.
We'll share our love and pass the fear.
Know he's happy, know he's free,
But not to worry, let it be.
Jesse Stoner
Our loving son Jesse, was murdered on May 30, 2000, along with his best friend, Jason Thompson.
The poem, NOT TO WORRY, was written by Jesse 2 weeks before his death, for a neighbor, when
her husband passed away. He had such talent. We miss our baby so much. God bless you Jesse and
Jason.
Our son was ripped from this world, by the hand of man. It was not God's will, but man's that took his
life. He died from gunshot wounds to the head and torso, in the back seat of a car. We stood there in the
parking lot for 4 hours, staring at the car with yellow tarp covering it. God, how we wished we could have
held him and told him how much we love him and said goodbye. Our only comfort is knowing that he is in
the arms of the Lord, and that he did not have to go on his new journey alone. He had his best friend Jason
with him. Now they are both in God's house.
Jesse was a good kid. I know most parents say that, but he really was. He was a class clown, and he was
bestowed that honor in his Senior yearbook. Of course we didn't know that until we received the book a
week after his death. He was also a fairly good artist. One of the pictures is a self portrait he did of himself.
He wanted to become a firefighter. Some way he could help people.
Jesse had his first love in 1998. When they broke up later that year, he was so distraught, that he took an
overdose of pills. We were on suicide watch for 3 months. He finally got over that and life was great. He
had gotten a job working for Interstate Batteries. The first part of May of 2000, he dropped a jar on his
foot and severed a tendon, which required surgery. He was laid up at home for a while, so I guess that
was our time with him. When he was killed, he still had a cast on his foot. He couldn't have run, even if
he wanted to.
Dennis Cramm, the boy who killed him and Jason was found guilty of first degree murder and is currently
serving a 60 year sentence. He won't be eligible for parole for 50 years. His father, Dale, is in jail on drug
charges. We just wish that he would have been brought up on murder charges as well. He planted all the
guns about the yard that day. He pleaded the fifth on the stand. Some father!
"My Son"
My dearest Jesse,
How I wish you were here.
The days and nights go by,
And we can feel you near.
You were taken so suddenly,
At a very young age.
We fight all the feelings,
But we're still filled with rage.
The young man who killed you,
Now sits in a cell.
He's the one who took you,
And gave us this Hell.
We pray you are happy,
We know you are free.
But it doesn't heal our hearts,
When here is where you should be.
I wait for you to come home,
Just out with your friends.
But I know that won't happen,
Dennis Cramm brought it all to an end.
My heart is so heavy,
It's been torn from my chest.
How could God have taken,
One of his very best.
I suppose life will go on,
For your father and me,
And one day your beautiful face,
Again we will see.
Help us through this life, my love,
I pray on bended knee.
Until we are together again,
For all eternity.
Mom
"Parents' Pain Grows Since Son's Murder"
By:Julie Muhlstein
Herald Columnist
You are getting out of the shower and find a lump in your breast. And
doctors discover cancer. You miss so much work that bills go unpaid. And
filing for Chapter 13 bankruptcy is the one hope for keeping the house. You
are driving home and get in a traffic accident. And the truck you've had
since 1988 is totaled. All these things happen at once. You feel ... what?
Like giving up? Or, having just undergone a mastectomy and facing radiation
and chemotherapy, would you pronounce the cancer "just an annoyance"? Would
you say the disease is "no big deal"? Can you fathom anyone saying that? I
can. Since meeting Donna and Ken Stoner, I can fathom it. "We've already gone
through the worst thing we're ever going to go through, the loss of our son,"
Donna said Thursday as a torrent of rain fell on their modest south Everett
home. I can fathom it, but I can't know how it feels. "Sometimes people say,
'I know how you feel.' Well I'm sorry, you don't," Donna said. "Not unless
you've lost a child through murder," said her husband,. Their son, Jesse
Stoner, and his friend Jason Thompson, both 18, were gunned down in a car
last May after a fistfight they had gone to watch ended in gunfire. On Feb.
26, a Snohomish County jury found 18-year-old Dennis Cramm guilty of
first-degree murder in the killings. Three days into the two-week trial,
47-year-old Donna was diagnosed with cancer. On March 2, she had a radical
modified mastectomy. She'll start radiation and six to eight months of
chemotherapy later this week. Ken, 49, was headed home Monday afternoon when
his truck hit a car making a left turn in front of Mariner High School. "I
have no vehicle, and I'm still hurting," he said. Yet, the couple seem hardly
fazed by the accident or the cruel disease heaped atop the nightmare from
which they can't awaken. Nine months after the teens' deaths, life is still
all about Jesse. An urn containing their only child's ashes rests on a stereo
speaker. White leather baby shoes, sturdy and scuffed, are there, too.
Pictures of the tall young man -- smiling, wearing a silly hat, posed with
Jason -- flash by on their computer screensaver. In the bedroom of the
couple, who will have been married 25 years come June, snapshots cover the
walls -- a toddler in a laundry basket, a kiddie-team basketball photo, young
teens dressed for a date. The trial made it all fresh, the loss, the pain.
"We wanted Dennis to pay. We'd prefer that his father would have to pay
also," Donna said. Dale Cramm pleaded guilty to two drug felonies and
asserted his Fifth Amendment privilege during his son's trial. "What kind of
father puts guns around and leaves his son out to dry?" Ken asked. Donna,
describing herself as "a spiritual person," said she prayed to forgive Dennis
Cramm. "In the courtroom, I made eye contact with him. I felt sorry for him,"
she said. Her husband, a Roman Catholic and deeply religious, said they don't
approve of the death penalty. After the verdict was announced, Donna
approached Dennis Cramm's mother, Jacque Cramm, and gave her a hug. "We're
not the only ones who have suffered," she said. Their hearts go out to Sonny
and Mary Thompson, Jason's parents, to the boys' friends, and to anyone who
has lost a child. "We used to watch the news and see school shootings and
violence. Now we have an inside view," Ken said. "Before, we felt for them.
But we didn't know. Now we do." Their financial struggles stem from health
problems and work time lost after Jesse's death. Ken is employed by an
electronics company in Bothell. He wasn't paid for absences taken for
hearings in the case or during the trial. Donna, who has worked at JanSport
but isn't now working, isn't sure how she'll handle chemotherapy. "We are in
the middle of filing bankruptcy," she said. "Everything's up in the air. We
don't know if we're going to end up losing our house," Ken added. Any one of
their setbacks could be seen as a last straw. "We're usually pretty
optimistic, but we keep getting dumped on. It tends to wear you down," Donna
said. "All we can do is keep on keeping on," her husband said. "If it wasn't
for my belief in Christ, that and the love of my wife, I don't know what I'd
do." There were long silences as I sat with the Stoners. The clock ticked.
Jesse's dog, Swisher, snuggled on the couch. Donna, petite with dark curly
hair, wiped her eyes. "Since the trial, we wonder, 'What do we do now?' We
have no other children," she said. "Now that it's all over, it seems like
he's slipping away." "We were hoping someday that Jesse would have a family,"
Ken said. "We would have loved having a little Jesse and Jessica running
around the house." Fighting now for her own life, Donna said softly, "It's
something we'll never know."
Contact Julie Muhlstein via e-mail at
[email protected] , write to her at The Herald, P.O. Box 930,
Everett, WA 98206, or call 425-339-3460.
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