“So?” Elisabeth asked, as Katie and Kevin walked into Paul and Denise’s house. Everyone sat in the living room, watching the two.
“I’m fine.” Katie said, setting down Isabella’s baby carrier and working on taking off her coat. Her dirty blonde hair was pulled back messily in a ponytail and she had washed off all signs of any make-up. Instead of her outfit that she had been wearing for work, she had changed into one of Kevin’s tank tops and a baggy pair of pajama pants.
“The doctor gave her some medication to take to help her sleep and something to help with depression.” Kevin said.
“With having dealt with depression before, he wanted to make sure I was taken care of again incase I dealt with it again.” Katie said, pulling Isabella out of the carried and bringing her into the living room.
“We’ve got some stuff in the car too.” Kevin said, setting down the baby bag in the carrier and moving it out of the way.
“We’ll go help you bring it in.” Joe said, motioning for Frankie and Nick to come help him.
“We set up a make-shift nursery in Frankie’s old room. The crib is already set up and its right across from you guys.” Denise started saying, taking Isabella.
Katie wrapped her arms around herself, running her hands up and down her arms like she was cold. Her face looked blank, as if everything was still sinking in.
Peyton looked at Isabella, who was content in Grandma’s arms with everyone looking at her. The young baby didn’t know what had happened. She didn’t understand why her parents had spent their day talking to the cops and at the hospital. She wasn’t going to understand how things were going to be extremely hard, especially on Katie.
************************************************************************
Katie looked around the bedroom. She hadn’t been in this room since they had first moved to New Jersey. This was Kevin’s old bedroom. This was where he had grown up.
The bed didn’t have their comforter. The walls weren’t painted a deep green color. The nightstand didn’t have one of their many framed wedding photos. Her Boston Red Sox posters weren’t on the back of the closet doors. The pillows weren’t molded to their bodies, to their heads.
“Will I lose my dignity? Will someone care? Will I wake tomorrow from this nightmare?” Katie softly sang, leaning up against the bedroom door. That song from ‘Rent’ used to calm her nerves. That song and ‘A Little Bit Longer’ had been her song when she was sad or not wanting to eat. But, she couldn’t bring herself to sing that.
It killed her inside, that the one song that had helped her feel better would no longer be seen that way. It would be a reminder for the rest of her life of what had happened.
She slid down the door, curling up into a ball and trying to sing again. “Will I lose my dignity? Will someone care? Will I wake tomorrow from this nightmare?”
She looked around the room at all the reminders of what was changing and she took a deep breath. “Got the news today, doctor said I had to stay, a little bit longer and I’ll be fine. When I thought it’d all been done, when I thought it’d all been said, a little bit longer and I’ll be fine.” She started. A lump formed in her throat and she couldn’t fight against the tears that had started to slip out. “And you don’t know what you’ve got till it’s gone.”
The tears overtook her body and she started shaking. Her body shook as each sob hit her to the core. Each tear was one second of fear that she had in that closet, every worry she held, every moment she felt was slipping away. Every sob and tear showed a side she was too scared to show.
Kevin leaned up against the door, wiping tears from his own eyes. He wanted to hold her and swear that everything would be okay, that this was just another bump that they’d get through.
He ran a hand through his curly hair and from the other side of the bedroom door; he joined his wife in crying.