To my Daughter Rose

Happy Birthday little girl
I miss you lots, its a peril
each year coming to your spot
wishing you know your not forgot
Love you always Rose, you were a daughter
showing me to love, showing how to parter
here you lay now silently spoken
but my hearts yet broken
Child, I miss you and love you always
sitting her with you these days
silence has your voice, but your motions speak
I love you Rose, your the best, give or take meak
for me my daughter, your the best gift
happy birthday Rose, your yet living a swift
in my heart and memories, such a child
raising you from the tender times wild
I can' stop sayin' I love you, for its the truth
Rose, if you ever need me, mammas here, booth
Noone can keep you away, come to me when you wish
for I'm here rose, always my love is not a dish

Arkansas

From the valleys steep
Mountains high and deep
to the surging waters long
running always never gone


To the blue skies high
unending miles of birds fly
from the rolling hills and pastures
greens so soft and lucious calling masters


Air so soft in winds blown
so hot yet, but welcome shown
Sunshine to rain so quick
woods thin, and woods thick

Calling Fire

the storms of ages old fire
burn deep within me, this dire
year the pyro kills
drinking; death fills


cups of names be drunk
souls be caught and dunk
taken from the living
death; never giving


fires burn deeper in me
the desire, the want, the need
burning, calling out burns
telling my soul, its me he yearns

Gathered Apart

Given my heart
you tore it apart
now alone
Truth shown
within eyes
listen my cries
heard the night
lost fight
never again
should've been


death to me
look with glee
sit here now
you don't ask how
the blade through
old as now new
news travel short
this last resort
alone I am, always
be alone rest of my days

GoodBye

Rose child, how you holding up?
though I'm ni battle, your not shut
fight when you are angered, keep it out
seems like you've only been a shout
in my minds memories child
I'm missin' you like wild
come back to me soon hope I
sitting in this spot I cry
You've gone away for a short while I say
but really you were silenced that day
not so long ago, kissed you one last time
before you let go of your life,a sweet rhyme
you told me "mamma don' cry tis sad to I
Love you mamma, please hold me, I'm lost
did I do anything that I could pay a cost?
Mamma, I dn' wanna go, but they call
Goodbye mamma, I know we'll meet," I draw
Rose, please don' talk, I'm here, your here
I love you sweety, mammas here, as a tear
went down my face,I know this was goodbye.

Have you helped? or have you failed?

without your sound I have not voice
without your words I have no choice
without your eyes I have no vision
without your looks I have no decision

with your sound I have life
with your words I have strife
with your eyes I have seen

without your fights I have no skill
without your moves I have no thrill
without your teachings I have nothing learned
without your guidiance I have nothing earned

with your fights I have hate
with your moves I have fate
with your teachings I have bind
with your guidiance I have gone blind

so what? you think you've helped me?
as your sitting there, laughing with a glee
you'll soon learn that nothing you know
will help your kind survive, you'll be the last to go

Love

love is told to be everywhere in life
but I look around, and see strife
my mind is old, the body young
its not just started or begun
for me I'm old, life is no surprise
seeing so many princes fall and rise
the moon and stars come and go
but do they change? I don' know
watching times go by so rapidly
thinking back happily
to the easier times in my mind
where there was not many tears to find
of the faces of children I'd seen each time
walking later or early day or night
not many was there in fight
times change from then on there
but time I wish would go back here
to peace and quiet

Not Given a Chance

there are times I don' know what to feel
to think, that maybe, the bad isn't real
would be to be living a fantasy isn't it?
theres really no such thng as being to strict
beat the c hild sensless till its resting on the floor
least then, the child speaks no more
or how about wake the child and yell at it to come
down to beat it, pick it up and throw it like a crumb
really, see how much you love your child
but when the child moves no more you go even more wild
beating and bashing the child to only cause the shed
of blood and its brains, now lays dead

Pain

how can you say
that things will be ok
when you dont' know

how can you say you knew
what I now go through
when thigns are not exact

ragged things are now
soon, I will vow
to live again never more

take this breath
let me rest
just let me die

take this heart and it burn
take this lung and let it churn
to a messy oblivion

Summer Time Fears

You've been up all night, they were drunk
your things are already in the back of the truck
stayed up on caffine, writing, thinking, worried
time comes to go, in a way your in a hurry
but yet you don' wanna leave nor stay
the night long time faded into the day
when the fight started, your being yelled at
yet again for something you've not done, its crakced
your tongue flows free, quick and hot
theres no way in hades to make it stop
mom walks in, they begin to fight
things go from nerves to tears to flight
running quickly, away as he beats her
shes yelling, screaming, crying, taking off for shelter
running to your aunt terry's but he catches you
yoru screaming, backing away as he grabs and threw
down off her porch, called a Bitch, Slut, Whore
he means it, your hysterically crying scared
all the thigns he said-a lie- he never cared
he beats and grabs you till your silently submissioned

Troubled Death

Who am I to you love?
am I just someone you shove?
or someone you wish to hurt so badly?

I am not to have my say to things?
Nor am I to talk of the time brings?
I'm to shut u and mind my "master"?!

I ask you if love me you do
You say Am I to love who?
Look away from you heart broken

You laught at me for having feelings
for helping others in their dire dealings
but I am to know not true love?

Tonight I end my sorrowful life
I have to much sadness and strife
to carry on much longer goodbye.

Alone

alone once more
now closed door
the hearts beat
once high, now bottom of feet

finally the musik is seen
now a heart lay clean
but broken on the ground
what they say comes around

one now love never
again, he was clever
sticking in a knife
caring love and strife

broken, what once whole
left there for the cold
to pick up and carry left
off to where all is, death.

All Hallows Eve

witches, goblins, ghosts and ghouls
truth from lie, friends or foes
fearing what they do not know
through their eyes it'll show
fear the truth, comfort in lies
ignore the night, and innocent cries

flying, running, floating, and creeping
myths of past and future keeping
truth hidden from their view
only known to selected few
what they act is what they fear
never knowing that its near

laughing, cackling, moaning, and screaming
spells and charms, moonlight beaming
spirits come, but are they bad
whispering words, witches mad
evilness in the air tonight
be afraid, and be in fright


All Hallows Eve 2

it's all hallows eve
yet, I grieve
the pain from one
that had begun
the emotions of others
words faulty and shutters
open my mouth, shut once more
close my eyes, shut the door
this is not a good night at all
the moon rises then it will fall
the stars don't shine, nor the wind blow
not a sound is heard, not even a crow
leaves move, but no sound is heard
flapping of wings, but not a bird
is in sight; the wolfs howl
the sky replies with a scowl
things slowly fade away
the night of evil gives to good day

Bereft

looking back in hindsight
I see that my hearts fight
was not really a war at all
more so just wanting to fall
into your embrace and feel loved
but yet there was something above
my eyes that I could not see straight
losing the best thing in my life, I hate
to know that my heart still longs for you
making me cry sometimes, feelings blue
I know you are happy and thats very well
just wish that there was something that fell
along with the realization of you leaving
instead of my mind constantly teasing
hoping that one day, maybe one day
we'll be together, I pray
I miss you dearly and you'll never know
how much I love you, and it will show
I know I did wrong and I know that I lied
I weep the tears of sorrow, and still I cry

Goodbye

just sometimes
I wonder why
when the bell chimes
it makes me want to cry
sitting in this dark room
feeling the cold chill on my skin
the dawn brings nothing but doom
and the dusk ends what may begin
you wondered why those times my tears
covered my face, stained black and red
my eyes showed everything I fear
and then you knew, that I was dead
you wondered where this could've come
wondered why I had this pain
only words I could tell you is from
inside my heart where its rain
is your clouds of words in my heart
you are the cause of my death
you are the one that took me apart
I thank you, goodbye, for now I've met

Lone Wolf

Lone wolf howls to nothing
air, earth, fire, water stir something
a cry so sad, so hurt, and shunned
elements stir what's begun
howling to the land and sky
listen, I am the one who's cry
is the wolf alone, and sad
elemental earth, mad

Love And War

if all is fair in love and war
then why have all times before
my heart has fallen torn
wrapped around, is the veil worn
sorrow and death mask the face
tears of blood stain the place
love you I'd die for you
but my eyes deep blue
you did not see nor mind
what you could find
peace, love, happiness, rest
but instead, you manifest
distrust, sadness, lonliness, and pain
I wish I could cry acid tears of rain
maybe then you'd see how you hurt me

Mind Trouble

thines eyes wander this eve
fraid tell let pass what be
trouble on thees mind
in hindsight can find
what storms into thous sky
silence, in thines sigh?
cometh now from hence
awayeth, let us now commence
thines last dance
we must'nt, we shant
time a-waste
maketh haste
death cometh as thiefs
now ye's mind seeth
death

Mixed Feelings
this is dedicated to my love, Ael

I have a confession to make
but yet, I fear for what fate
will be drawn upon what I say
remember about the other day
whent he conversation was
college; I felt mixed cuz
I am happy for you, but yet sad
knowing why I don't, bitte I had
hoped you'd go to a great school
yet around you I feel like a fool
I'd miss you when you go
but don't stay for me, my eyes show
the love that I hold for you
my eyes misty blue
thats what was bothering me
sorry I didn't tell, couldn't see
how to get through the mist
words taht I couldn't list
how to express my feelings of bliss

Pink Carnation

of the hate and pain
and harsh winds rain
a flower reaches
through the breaches
pink carnation
why this tarnation?

dozen or less
thats been left
on the step of my door
whats this for?

sweet smelling, but deadly
wonderous, sweet medly
listen to the voice
that gives no choice

blow a kiss
before dropping to the abyss
where not even a sigh
can reach out to a cry

Questions

How can people ask me
why not write a poem of glee?
my response is why should I?
what around me is not in cry
there is little or no joy
so I ask them to ploiy
what is it that makes them smile?
for miles and miles and a mile
around me I only see darkness
thrown between lights harpness
created by deaths grin
so before the words begin
and you do not like whats written
then don't complain and be smitten
my words, my thoughts, my work
don't like it, then don't murk
and complain about my poems
I take them from my homes

Tear

my eyes begin to cry
this is my tme
to leave and die
never forgive myself for the lie

not knowing clearly the reason
wishing, the time and season
would fit my mood, of treason
hurting and my heart is freezin'

I'd done anything to see you laugh
anything that would not make you mad
my heart still yearns to have you back
but you are happy, and I am glad

A promise I made to you
only a heart I made blue.

Valley Night Walk

Though I walk through this land
this place, this valley darkness grand
once I was alone, silently walking
listening, others talking
around my eyes drank in the sight
unklike the day, it is a beautiful night
beside me once alone
now a shadow figure shown
taller than I, yes
but yet, none the less
we walk through this valley
watching others tally
strengthend by words
flying as birds
the moon shows peace
within a sky never asleep
a misty haze over the moon
the night is young, not soon
a deep feeling within
the moons light never "fin"

War and Destruction

Watching as the rain comes down
the wind moving, blowing things down
against the lightning thunder is found
the sky lights up the ghost town

darkness after the lightning is gone
be this the end, the spawn
of times chaos applaud
while little ones watch for dawn

complete storms rage the night
thunder rolling, bolts strike
no dawn is coming to light
everything sleeps through life

rain pleting against the glass
windows open shut the last
light strikes through past
now complete darkness at last.

Dreams Longing

in bed I lie awake, listening to my heart
listening to it cry that we're apart
the moon shines bright, and the star flies
just like the twinkle, in your eyes
closing my eyes I let the pain
fall to release the storm of rain
wanting to flood to bring you back
yet, theres something I slack
needing to feel your touch on me
wanting to have you set me free
needing to know you love still
that is all I wish, to be love filled.

Angel of Eternity

dancing candle lights
upon the ground so green
flying through these nights
candles gleam
my angel of eternity

black is the sky
red is the moon
we fly
never to soon
forever together

wild and free do we soar
green candles scent
healing every scar and sore
through the clouds we went
careless without worry

red candles light our way
flying through roses
beauty of the day
seen through nights closes
happy as can be

white roses of candles so pure
amorous with promises
healing lights do we cure
always thinking of thee

Bird Cage

Broken, captured, trapped, dying
Falling from the tree
Noose tightens around my neck
Suffocating on your words

Trying to hold flooding words
Breathing in the fiery smoke
Chocking on your commands
Suffocation no breathing

Swimming in all your rules
Trying to prove my innocence
Getting tired of fighting the currents
Drowning in all that you say

The dark used to hide my tears
Now, it must hide more
Your words bruised my body
Scarring my soul and spirit

Wanting nothing but denied everything
Freedom seems like a key lost
Your cage has me cornered
Cramping and failing to live my life

Loki's Dream A dream I had last week, one of those life changing, dramatic dreams that make you wish you either had a good singing voice, or a directorial debut at some movie studio. But since I'm not rich, nor famous enough to write a play, I'll just give you my dream in another form, a form I'd prefer honestly. Ya'll are really cool who read it all the way. Copy it and send it to everyone that can read!

Dream

Over mounts of gold, through my love's past
Behold the time and cry, behold thy fate and cry
For the hour was seven summers, the minute seven winters
And if only to breathe once more into her air
And live a second life I only dare
For has thy time for mine enemies, thy foes?
To conjure this flesh like the hunted does'?
Oh, the prey and oh, the hunted
Thy love, thy hand this heart only wanted
Yea, she still courts, yet as a bird she does so
And flies away, as this tongue calls not to go
But the time has past for lovers to care
The time has past for the world to bear
And if this flood of sorrow would fill me once more
This blood! This blood; upon the floor
As the life sprays the ground in wicked red
These eyes watch as it's soaked like bread
Wheat or whole, this bread seemed dry
It drank every drop before I die
Yea, the winter has filled the room
With all the screamers screaming of doom
The world cast from mine eyes
Overhead buzzes a corpse's flies
Soon they will have this mighty feast
And cure their hunger, the savage beasts
Before the death holds, before the heart folds
Before my breast no longer takes wind
Before voice can no longer send
I curse the land that drained my soul of light
And filled my dreams of death at night
This land, this graveyard, this horror, this pain
All a curse as my blood would stain
I curse the land the sells the love of peddlers
I curse the king and all his meddlers
I curse the land that cursed me first
I curse until my lungs would burst
But, before I could finish my seal that would last a lifetime
These lips shall not move, for my death would prime
The body grows weaker, the blood soaks deeper
And I for see all the sins and every crime
And it's dark, like curtains of an abandoned theatre it fills
I feel no body, no eyes, no mind, a land of damned hills
Mounds of bloody grass, upon which impaled sinners scream
I reach for nothing, and nothing is reached, could this be a dream?
A dream of nothing, that matters only to a greater being
A god that for told every death, his never seen
The author that wrote me, as I have been wrote
And she asked of me, dare I quote?
"Yea, lie of a lie, false of a falsehood
Nothing of you pure, nothing good
I made you a lie, in my image of lying
For you are deaths without even dying
Thou art a flea upon my brow
You are nothing but the truth now
You see that life is a riddle without a guess
For living a lie thou only test"
I stared in awe as my maker spoke
She new that my heart had broke
As I fall to my knee less knees
And screamed out all my pleas
I seen a spark of love in her eyes
I seen a shadow of doubt in her eyes
I seen the pain of guilt her eyes
All in one she devoured my being, my soul
I paid for my sins and paid heavy toll
Gone was I, but not anymore
My eyes opened, I lay on the floor
The blood was gone, in my bed it seemed
Then I wrote the dream I dreamed
For my words are wise, yea, youthful but true
I tried to solve my riddle, and finally came to
I realized exactly what I must always do
I must forgive my debts, and repay all of you
And forgive it all, and see it through
I must give my being as sacrifice
And no longer roll the deadly dice
Not believe in god, just in you I trust
And not give in to death's deadly thrust
Nor the game we all seem to play
So please, listen to the words I say
Thus, my life, my envy, my life, my lust
I grant all of you my undying trust
Oh, use it wisely; least you fail your test too
And forget all we know, or thought we knew
It's not how you live; it's how you give
It's not the conformed lives of so chosen few
Nay the lives of all of you
Not the good, the evil, the great, the poor
Your all the reasons we're living for
Not to fight or quarrel, drink from barrel
Nor drown our fears and regrets
Nay the lives of sorrow, wishing of no tomorrow
Nor spend our souls on handicapped bets
Least ye are fools, I know some have merit
Take my dream, and please share it
-Loki Dementia
Cool, eh? Hope ya like it, if not, that’s cool, least ya read it, right?
Thanks for the time!

Kapri's Poem

' We're bleeding and laughing, the roses are tainted, in glory isn't truth.
Mostly the morning never dawns if it's to save the passing of love.
I found in you what I wanted to find in someone.
But I lost the war and you kissed darkness.
Your scent lingering in the recesses of every shadow, haunting me in my madness, so insane a Malkavian would fear the torment I hold at bay.
The romance I'd forgotten reminded me that love is untrue, it's there and then gone.
No one knows this pain I buried so long ago.
Reawakened by lies and anguish, but denial lies inside each open door.
Never can comfort be won over by razor blades in disguise.
Condemned to never forget you and to never forget this ache that encompasses my soul and makes me go weak with the passion.
What mirrors may entrap the reflections of the soul.
But each taste is beauty and each remembrance is of blood.
Your pain outweighed your passion, but the demon runs her fingers through your hair.
In dark madness the end is undetermined, but yet we see it with eyes of ash.
And so I burn again, the throes of passion fresh in my mind.
This torment isn't truth but neither is anything 'real'...'

Goodbye

walking alone
its shown
through the tears
but not the fears
its shown through and done
whats now begun
is the pain
that constantly gain
up on me and pushes
from trees to bushes
I fall down
but yet a clown
is seen in me
will they with glee
laugh or cry with sadness
as I look at my own madness
I die slowly
not knowingly
I fell for my own knife
ending my tears life
drowning in them
I fall and again
get back up for air to live
but yet my heart can't give
what is needed to go on
so here I rest, gone

Dream World

walking alone
I know its shown
through my eyes
you see the cries
I stay away
fear of the day
comes to awaken
from my heavenly taken
back into the cruel
world to duel
away all my pain
watching the rain
come down
and turn smiles to frown
sleeping in my dream
wanting to stay clean
keep away from the evil
but yet deceitful
do the eyes show inside
hear my cry, I am me, me I am
this is how my life began
knowing what I'm to be
you don't know me
so listen up before you disagree
I am clean
I am me

Song: Blutengel -No Eternity
Mood: trance
Sitting here there is nothing
needing to roam, needing to fly
I have nothing but something
yet you are not by my side

the moon shines black
the sun has died
buried me out back
where I last cried

did you really precieve
the pain I felt at deaths door?
or were thou decieved
by my heart on the floor?

laying on the ground
where I was put to rest
here is where I found
the comfort of best

lonliness is me
and I of him
there is something you see
but it is grim

london bridge did fall
I had already drowned
no eternity to call
our own, only lonliness found

falling from you and you from I
call me back from death I cry
yet there is nothing
that you hear


From the heavens I may have fallen
white wings I can only try
to bring back to once brilliance
faery wings are mine, sometimes difference
faery to vampiric depending whom you speak

my heart resting in your hands
my trust in your heart
my promise of eternity to you

when words "I Love You" are said
that is one thats never a lie
you are my savior in my time of need
I just pray to be the same to you

carry you away from pain, hold your brokenness
keep you safe from all harm
you are my angel

Peaceful Sleep

The sun was sinking into the water, I watched as the black clouds moved across the water like stampeding stallions. As the sun was sinking, rays of light touched the graveyard. Willow trees and Pine trees stood firm like soldiers for the queen. Upon your tomb, four black roses and four red roses were placed in a vase of blood. Four deaths, Four loves, and blood spilled to hold the pain. Around your grave I placed four candles, each a different meaning. Green to heal the pain, White to protect you where you may be, Red for love and compassion to shine through you and I. The last one being Black, representing the distance between us. Death hath claimed thee in thines finest hour, and hath taken thee away from I. Tears begin to sting my eyes of light grey. Drops of blood spilled from the eyes that hath cried many rivers and lakes of sorrow. As each candle was lit, I could feel you drawing me into your cold, lifeless arms. I know you meant not to lose in my hour of need. I know your tears is the rain from the sky that falls overhead. As the candles grew brighter and the scent they held grew into a memory of you and I, my heart laid at your grave, crying the last river it shall cry. Your touch began to feel more lively, more tangible, I knew that I would not wake from where I laid. Rain turned into ash and ash turned into snow. So cold was it, yet so warm were your arms. Never moving, never protesting, I laid closer to your tomb, hopes to join you soon. As my eyes closed the sun had disappered and the willows began to weep and the Pine began to grow protective of its domain. You were there when I awoke from my sleep. I was finally with you once again.