Well I Never...
Connor and
Dawn looked around before sneaking into Angels office. Yep this is where he
kept the alcohol. Once inside they began hearing noises of a different kind and
unfortunately they looked under the table just in time to see Angel and Spike
caught in a rather compromising position.
“Oh my god,”
Dawn cried out looking away.
Connor didn’t
really react, “Hi Dad, Hi Spike he said and continued to reach for the bottle
of Johnny sitting on Angels desk.
“Wait a sec,”
Angel said, “what do you think you’re doing?” he stood up about to try and stop
Connor when he realised he was fully naked.
“Angel mate,
not that I mind but for the nibblets sake surely you could at least put
something on,” Spike started concerned for his adopted daughter.
Angel was
forever thankful he couldn’t blush because if he could that’s certainly what he
would be doing.
“And lil Bit
just what do you think you’re doing? If you’re gonna drink we all may as well
have fun and there’s a game I’m just dying to play.”
----------------
About 15
minutes later Spike had carefully explained the rules of ‘I Never’ to them. It
would have been a lot simpler if his bloody sire hadn’t kept interrupting. The
rules were you went around the circle each saying something you have never done
and the other people in the circle had to each take a swig of the bottle if
they had, and thank god they managed to find a lot more bottles.
“I’ll start,”
Connor said giving Spike an evil look, “I’ve never given a guy a blow job.”
He watched as both
his father and Spike each took a long gulp unashamedly.
Spike looked
back at him, “I’ve never had sex on a kitchen bench.”
Dawn and
Connor both reached for the bottle getting looks from their respective parents.
“Are you sure
you guys never have?” Dawn asked amazed.
“Vamps don’t
have much use for kitchens,” Spike replied shrugging.
Dawns turn.
“I’ve never licked blood off another mans stomach.”
Again both
Angel and Spike reached for the bottle. This game was too easy.
Angel looked
Dawn right in the eyes and said, “I’ve never fooled around in a bathtub.”
“How did you
know?” Connor asked red-faced.
“Vampire
hearing.”
“But we hear
you guys in the bathroom all the time.”
“Not in the
bathtub, shower sometimes, floor usually, but not the bathtub.”
Spike, Connor
and Dawn all reached for the bottle. Angel looked quizzically at Spike.
“Dru,” Spike
explained.
Connors turn
for revenge. Spike took a swig from the bottle, “I’m thirsty,” he stated and
downed the rest of the bottle. “Well that and I wanna get all sloshed and have
really loud sex.”
“Ewww!!!” Dawn
said but due to her little experience with alcohol she was already tipsy.
“I’ve never
done it standing up.” Connor finally said. The boy just wasn’t that creative.
Angel and
Spike again drank, except this time they took much larger gulps realising it
would take a while for them to get drunk and trying to even the game up a bit.
Spike pondered
his next move realising that he could use this game to find out exactly what
Connor and Dawn had gotten up to.
“I’ve never
done it with my niece,” Spike stated. With this he got curious looks as nobody
took a drink. “Connor, don’t ya think there’s something you’re forgetting? Your
Angel’s son and I’m his childe, therefore we’re kinda brothers and if Dawn’s my
adopted daughter then she’s your niece.”
Connor didn’t
seem at all worried with this and simply took a gulp.
Dawns turn.
Her speech had begun to slur, “Well I’ve neevvver taken it up the ass.”
Angel and
Spike both reached for the bottle. If it wasn’t for the alcohol this game would
have been boring by now.
Angel looked
at her and Connor, “I’ve never given head in a highschool bathroom before.”
And again Dawn
and Connor bore guilty looks as they opened a new bottle and downed about ¼
each.
The game
continued and as Dawn or Connor ‘I nevered’ Angel and Spike both had a drink
just as when Angel and Spike ‘I nevered’ Dawn and Connor had to take one
occasionally Angel and Spike taking a drink at one of their partner’s ‘I
never’s’ and Spike kept getting really kinky ideas.
“I’ve never
chained my boyfriend up and fucked him senseless.” Connor said.
Angel and
Spike gulped down some more alcohol.
“I’ve never”
hiccup giggle Spike started, “done it on the lounge of the Hyperion.”
Angel, Dawn
and Connor took a drink.
“Actually Spike
I think we have,” Angel said looking at his Childe.
“Oh yeh that’s
right,” Spike said and took a drink himself still giggling.
“I’ve never
done it fully clothed,” Dawn stated bluntly.
Angel and
Spike took a drink.
Connor and
Dawn were both really drunk and with each kinky idea they were getting really
horny.
“I’ve never
done it in a cinema,” Angel said it didn’t matter that he’d never been to a
cinema with someone kinky enough to wanna do it there; he and Spike seemed to
be into staying home these days.
Again Dawn and
Connor took a drink.
“I’ve never
done it with a Wolfram and Hart attorney,” Connor said his speech slurring.
Angel took a
drink glaring at his son.
“I never did
it in my parents or parents of my boyfriend/girlfriend’s bed.” Spike said gleefully.
Connor, Dawn
and Angel all took a swig.
“It was right
after I... took my revenge.” Angel said before anyone could ask. “The way Darla
explained it it seemed to make sense at the time.”
But Spikes
attention was quickly taken away as he watched Dawn and Connor take a drink. He
knew he smelled them there, and he was so changing the sheets, actually Angel
so was, he didn’t do household chores that was far too poofy for him.
Dawn felt
really really sick, she was about to say something but she passed out, her head
landing in Connor’s lap.
Spike giggled,
“Lil Bit can’t hold her liquor.”
“You giggled.”
Angel said smiling.
“Did not.”
“Did too.”
“I so did
not.”
“You so did
too,” Angel said giggling at him.
“So did you
just then,” Connor pointed out, finding this hilarious.
Angel started
tickling Spike who was giggling insanely. Angel kept tickling him past the
point where he would have wet his pants if he was human. Angel turned to look
back at Connor but saw that he was sound asleep.
“Looks like
your boy’s not too good with the booze, Peaches.” Spike said slurring.
Angel kept
giggling, for some odd reason this was funny.
“You’re a
giggly one aren’t you?” Spike said.
“You started
it.”
“Did not.”
“Did too.”
“I so did
not.”
“You so did
too.”
“Wanna go have
sex?”
“Ok.”
----------------
The next
morning Dawn and Connor both woke up with massive hangovers, luckily Spike was
there with a glass of water and aspirin for each of them.
“Breakfast of
champions,” Spike stated.
“You don’t
eat,” Connor commented.
“Your point?”
Spike asked. “You two had a lot to drink last night.” Spike said smiling.
Dawn blushed a
crimson red when she remembered what she had confessed last night. “Crap...”
She said and took off for her room unable to face either Spike or Angel.
Connor seemed
less embarrassed and remembered the stuff that Spike and Angel had confessed
too, so he spent most of the day watching TV. Not surprisingly both Dawn and
Angel seemed to be AWOL for the day too embarrassed to face anyone. During the
course of the following days they both appeared out of their rooms eventually
but it took weeks before they could be in the same room, let alone look each
other in the eyes...
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