A timid knock tried not to disturb the thundering growl of Rammstein as The Lovely Beta maneuvered her newly refurbished desk into one corner of the basement office. With her back toward the open door, she didn't see the petite brunette standing in the doorway.
�Beta? Beta!� Shouting to be heard over the music and holding both hands over her ears, the girl hunted down the stereo cord and yanked it from the wall socket.
�Hey!� The Lovely Beta glared from the corner and gave the desk one last shove. �I was listening to that.�
�Yeah, yeah, yeah. I have plants with better taste.�
The Lovely Beta rolled her eyes and kicked the office chair toward the brunette before taking a seat on the desk, �So what do you think? I have an office. Doesn�t that kick all sorts of ass?�
�Well?�
�Come on, Annie. Be happy for me.�
�I hate it when you call me that.�
�Deal. Are you going to help me or not?�
�I need more info.� Annie sighed as she sat down primly and settled her handbag in her lap. �You joined the PPC, whatever that is.�
�Protectors of the Plot Continuum.�
�And you have an assignment? Or something. You�re supposed to kill a Marty Stu and fix plotholes.�
�In a nutshell.�
�And you need me why?�
�For that big brain of yours.� The Lovely Beta grinned as she hopped off of the desk and hefted one of the banker boxes across the room. �This is the Wanderverse. Hard copy. Well, this box and about six more.�
Annie�s eyes turned saucer, �All this?�
�And a bag of skittles.�
�This is a crossover?�
�A crossover universe. A bad crossover universe.�
Paper rustled softly as the brunette began to read, �Highlander, Hercules, Buffy, X-Files, Pretender? Nash Bridges? Is there anything that isn�t here?�
�No Teletubbies so far.�
�Xena, La Femme Nikita, Gargoyles. Wow.�
�Now you see why I need you.�
�You hate Highlander.� Annie looked up over the rim of her glasses. �You bailed after the first season and you�ve never even watched a single episode of Walker, Texas Ranger.�
�It�s a Chuck Norris thing.� The Lovely Beta shuddered.
�There�s nothing wrong with Chuck Norris, thank you very much.� Annie sniffed, tucking the pages neatly back into the box. �What do I get out of this? I�m not even a PPC agent.�
�I can handle the killing and enforcing part but this level of research is a bit out of my league.� She smiled in what she hoped was an encouraging manner. �And you�re the queen of bad TV and useless trivia.�
�Not making it better.�
�And there�s a lot of equipment. Technical stuff.� The Lovely Beta motioned to several more boxes waiting to be unpacked. �Canon analyzers, a portal generator, all sorts of fun toys. I know you love toys. And I�m no good with anything smarter than a coffee-matic.�
�I�m sure they have manuals. You can read.�
�Would you do it for the good of the fandom?�
�And you think that killing other people�s characters and slandering their work is the right way to do this?� Annie�s eyes narrowed skeptically.
�You can�t exactly shove good taste and talent down their throats.�
�Still not hearing a reason.�
�How about this? You help me and I won�t report your fic. If it does show up on the boards, I�ll make sure the other agents go easy on you.�
�You wouldn�t!� Annie squeaked as the color drained from her cheeks.
�And I won�t assassinate your Mary Sue.�
�She�s harmless! Well, mostly harmless. She�s just a little Mary Sue and I didn�t even know what a Mary Sue was when I wrote her.�
�And your fanon bunny collection?�
�Hey! I�m learning. Maybe I�m not Miss Canon Crazy Glue but I�m getting better. I only used
two bunnies in my last fic. I think.�
�Do we have a deal?� The Lovely Beta raised one eyebrow challengingly. �Help me take down this universe and I won�t be the one hacking your fic.�
�Alright.� Annie sighed in defeat and reached for the banker�s box at her feet. �But I�m going to need some coffee.�
�One cup of caffeine goodness coming up.�
�And no Rammstein.�
�E Nomine?�
Annie relented grudgingly, �But only for the first two hours and then you�ve got to pick something less German.�
to be continued.....
