Fashion Emergency


Fashion Emergency
by Lemur


FADE IN:

INT. DIVINE FASHIONS. - DAY.
(HOLLY)

A TALL BLONDE MODEL, HOLLY, STANDS BEFORE A RACK OF BRIGHTLY-
COLORED CLOTHES. SHE WEARS A FULL BODY LEOPARD SKIN DRESS
WITH A BLACK JACKET AND HIGH HEELS. SHE TURNS, HER BLONDE
HAIR SWEEPING ACROSS HER SHOULDER, TO ADDRESS THE CAMERA.

HOLLY

I'm Holly and this is a very special
edition of Fashion Emergency. Today,
we have a Divine Ruler who, one of
his trusted advisors tells us, is in
desperate need of color.

EXT. DIVINE PREDECESSORS STORAGE FACILITY. - DAY.
(BRAIN)

A MAN IN A DARK, VINYL-LOOKING, BLACK SHROUD, HIS DIVINE
SHADOW, STANDS BESIDE A PEDESTAL BEARING A SMALL, PALE BRAIN
WEARING A TRANSPARENT FACE MASK. A BEACON LIGHT FLASHES AS
THE BRAIN SPEAKS.

BRAIN

I am a Divine Predecessor and I am
here to represent my fellow
Predecessors. We are concerned about
His Divine Shadow.

THE MAN IN THE DARK ROBE MOVES HIS HEAD ALMOST IMPERCEPTIBLY
TOWARD THE BRAIN.

BRAIN (CONT'D)

I used to be a Divine Shadow, so I
understand the affinity. Black is
powerful. Black is disturbing, but
it's time to move on. Look at him.

HIS DIVINE SHADOW FIDGETS SLIGHTLY.

BRAIN (CONT'D)

The long robe, the hood - you can't
even see his face. He needs some
color. Help me, Fashion Emergency.

INT. DIVINE FASHIONS. - DAY.
(HOLLY, JACQUES, TINA, DAVID)

HOLLY WALKS PAST A RACK LINED WITH KNEE-HIGH BOOTS. THE BOOTS
ARE EVERY COLOR IN THE RAINBOW, SOME THAT AREN'T IN THE
RAINBOW AND SOME THAT ARE ACTUALLY RAINBOWED.

HOLLY

Okay, His Shadow needs some color
quick. We've gathered a group of
professionals to turn His Divine Shadow
into His Divine Rainbow.

A MAN, JACQUES, FLIPS RAPIDLY THROUGH A CLOSETFUL OF BRIGHT
CLOTHES.

HOLLY (V.O.)

We have Jacques Summers to help us
with clothing.

JACQUES TOSSES A RED, FEATHER BOA OVER THE CAMERA LENS.

JACQUES

I'm going to find some color, get Him
out of those black robes and that
hood. Liven Him up and find a lovely
shade that brings out his eyes a
little more.

A WOMAN, TINA, HOLDS UP HER MAKE-UP BRUSHES, FLAUNTING THEM
FOR THE CAMERA.

HOLLY (V.O.)

We have Tina Reeves to create some
magic with her make-up.

TINA PRESSES HER POWDER BRUSH AGAINST THE LENS OF THE CAMERA.

TINA

I'm really going to soften His style,
get rid of the harsh lines and dark
colors. Basically, I'll do the
opposite of what He's doing.

A MAN, DAVID, STANDS BEFORE A MIRROR, SHAKING A CANISTER OF
BLUE LIQUID FILLED TO THE EDGES WITH COMBS.

HOLLY

And David Jones will be doing hair.

DAVID FLASHES HIS SCISSORS, OPENING AND CLOSING THE BLADES
FOR THE CAMERA.

DAVID

I'll be doing His Divine hair. He
doesn't really have hair, but He does
have a lovely tattoo and I want to
see what we can do with that, make it
a little more interesting.

DAVID PAUSES, THINKING.

DAVID (CONT'D)

I guess we'll see.

INT. DIVINE FASHIONS. - DAY.
(HOLLY)

HOLLY SMILES.

HOLLY

We've got our experts and our fashion
emergency is on His way here now.

EXT. DIVINE FASHIONS. - DAY.

HIS DIVINE SHADOW WALKS DOWN THE URBAN STREET. HE IS FOLLOWED
BY TWO STRAIGHT LINES OF MEN WITH DARK BLUE ROBES AND WAFFLE-
PATTERNED FACES. THE MEN SHUFFLE ALONG, CARRYING WITH GREAT
ESTEEM THE BRAIN OF THE DIVINE PREDECESSOR.

INT. DIVINE FASHIONS. - DAY.
(HOLLY, HIS DIVINE SHADOW, BRAIN)

HOLLY TURNS TO THE DOOR AS HIS DIVINE SHADOW ENTERS.

HOLLY

His Divine Shadow, hi. Are you ready
for your fashion make-over?

HIS DIVINE SHADOW

I do not understand the point.

BRAIN

We talked about this. He has agreed.

HOLLY LOOKS POINTEDLY AT HIS SHADOW.

HIS DIVINE SHADOW

I have agreed. And I am ready.

HOLLY'S WIDE GRIN RETURNS AND SHE LOOKS TO THE CAMERA.

HOLLY

Okay. We've got our experts and now
we have our fashion emergency. When
we get back, we'll see if our Divine
Team is able to help His Divine
Shadow.

COMMERCIAL BREAK
(VOICE)

TWO HANDS UNFOLD AND A DEEP VOICE RESONATES OVER THE SIMPLE
VISUAL.

VOICE

The Dark Zone and the Light Universe
are the same. Yadda-yadda. Whatever
that thing says.

INT. DIVINE FASHIONS. - DAY.
(HOLLY, HIS DIVINE SHADOW)

HOLLY STANDS WITH TINA, JACQUES AND DAVID.

HOLLY

Tina, David and Jacques tell us they
have done what they can. Let's see if
it's a mission accomplished.

HOLLY TURNS AND THE CAMERA SWEEPS TO THE CORNER OF THE ROOM.
HIS DIVINE SHADOW STANDS BESIDE THE BRAIN BEING HELD BY ONE
OF HIS ATTENDEES. HE WEARS A SHIMMERING, MULTI-COLORED ROBE
CINCHED AT THE WAIST BY A RED BELT WITH DOUBLE NOTCHES. THE
ROBE DIPS TO A SHALLOW V-NECK DISPLAYING A DELICATE SILVER
CHAIN NECKLACE SUPPORTING AN INSECT PENDANT. THE TATTOO
DESIGN ON HIS BALD HEAD IS ACCENTED WITH GREEN HIGHLIGHTS AND
SMALL ROSES BLOOM FROM EACH SPIKE IN THE PATTERN. HOLLY TROTS
OVER TO HIM.

HOLLY (CONT'D)

The moment of truth: His Shadow, how
do you like your new look?

HIS DIVINE SHADOW LOOKS DOWN AT HIS NEW WARDROBE AND THEN TO
HOLLY.

HIS DIVINE SHADOW

I...I want you to kill yourself.

HOLLY'S SMILE FADES.

HOLLY

Kill myself?

HIS DIVINE SHADOW

Yes, kill yourself. But first, kill
them.

HE LIFTS HIS ARM, POINTING TO TINA, DAVID AND JACQUES,
COWERING OPPOSITE HIM. A BLUE-ROBED MAN STEPS FORWARD,
PUTTING A WEAPON IN HOLLY'S HAND. HORRIFIED, HOLLY LOOKS TO
THE FASHION EXPERTS AND RAISES THE WEAPON.

HIS DIVINE SHADOW (CONT'D)

Kill them.

HOLLY CLOSES HER EYES AND FIRES, GREEN WEBBING SHOOTING FROM
THE SKELETAL WEAPON AND INCINERATING THE TRIO. FRIGHTENED,
SHE TURNS HER EYES BACK TO HIS DIVINE SHADOW.

HIS DIVINE SHADOW (CONT'D)

Now...

HOLLY

Kill myself?

HIS DIVINE SHADOW

Yes.

HOLLY POINTS THE WEAPON AND PULLS THE TRIGGER. THE WEBBING
ENVELOPES HER HEAD, HER LEOPARD-PRINTED BODY TOPPLING TO THE
GROUND. HIS DIVINE SHADOW REGARDS THE FALLEN WOMAN, THEN
LIFTS HIS EYES TO HIS BLUE-ROBED ASSISTANT.

HIS DIVINE SHADOW (CONT'D)

Find my robe.

STEPPING OVER THE WELL-ACCESSORIZED BODY, HIS DIVINE SHADOW
EXITS THE SHOP.

FADE TO BLACK


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