We`ll Save You By Betty & Jen Lmr Date: March 2001 Fandom: Battlestar Galactica Rating: R Category: Slash themes Disclaimer: Not ours. We're not making any money of off this. Feedback: er.br@sympatico.ca & jenny@jnrhome.com Summary: The boys are in trouble. Who will save them? Part 1 (Betty) Apollo and Starbuck were bound butt naked to the wall of the cold dark cell. Their captors, all evil sex starved woman from the planet Pong, had just entered the cell so they could use the warrior`s bodies once more for their sick pleasure. The leader of the group was about to approach Apollo when suddenly there was a loud crash, and the far wall burst apart, the air was filled with dust and debris. Everyone in the room either turned or looked up to see the source of the crash. There in the wall was a silver mini-van, and inside in it were five occupants, all coughing and spitting dust out of their mouths. The rear door slid open and three woman jumped out. "That`s it this is the last time Jade drives my van," Betty yelled. "She damn neared killed all of us," Jen added. "I broke a finger nail," Rita whined. "You think that`s bad, I hurt my wittle nose when it hit the windshield," Becky stormed. "Somebody help me," Jade cried from inside the van. "Get out of the van yourself," Jen cried back. "Hey, look naked men," Becky said as she pointed to the wall were our heroes were tied. "Hey want to sell them?" Jade asked as she crawled over the van. "That one looks like Starbuck, I`ll take him!" Rita yelled. "That`s because he is Starbuck silly and that`s Apollo, I want him," Betty said. "Nobody is buying these men from us, they are our sex slaves." Apollo and Starbuck looked at each other and then at the five new comers. "How do they know our names?" Starbuck asked. "I don`t know, hey, you guys, how do you know who we are?" Apollo asked. Jade spoke up first. "Don`t you recognise us? I`m Jade, that`s Betty, Jen, Becky and Rita." "RITA!!!!!!! NO! APOLLO THAT`S RITA, SHE`S COME TO GET ME!!!!!!!!!!!" Starbuck screamed. "That`s right, big boy. I`m here and these captors are outta here, then your mine." Suddenly the five new comers were giving our heroes captors karate chops, and kick boxing them in the face, which was pretty good considering not one of them knew karate or kick boxing. Soon the captors were laying on floor knocked out cold. The girls quickly untied the boys and threw them into the van. Before she had the chance to get her hands and Starbuck, Rita was pushed into the driver seat and forced to drive out of there. It should be noted that she did this under protest. Suddenly Apollo was heard to say, "Excuse me but could someone get her off of me?" Everyone turned to see Jade, sitting on Apollo`s lap and wiggling her butt. She looked at the other occupants and said, "What?" Then Rita suddenly turned a corner really fast and the van tipped over. It rolled down the hill and landed on it`s roof at the bottom of the hill. "Sorry I wasn`t watching where I was going," Rita said. "Great, now what do we do?" Starbuck whined. Part 2 (Jen) They all climbed out of the van and dusted themselves off. While everyone was busy making sure everyone else was alright Starbuck took the opportunity to make a break for it. Rita had her eye on him the whole time, however, and quickly ran after him in hot pursuit. Seeing that his lover was in trouble Apollo took off after both of them. Becky, Betty, Jen, and Jade just looked at each other. "Should we go after them?" Betty asked. "Nah. Rita can handle both of them," Becky assured her. "Actually, I think Betty was more worried about Starbuck and Apollo than about Rita," Jen put in. Jade couldn't hide an evil snicker. The four women looked at each other with expressions of dawning horror. Without a word they all took off running in the direction that Rita had headed. Rita and the boys must have gotten a pretty big head start because it was some time later before they managed to track them down. They had trouble finding them at first but after awhile they heard a male voice wailing in distress so they simply followed the sound. Sure enough after a few moments they came to a riverbank and there they were. A sopping wet Starbuck was tied to a nearby tree. A soaked and angry looking Rita was sitting on a large rock and had an equally drenched Apollo bent over her knees, his pants down around his ankles. "...And this is for making me chase you!" WHACK! WHACK! Rita was soundly blistering the Captain's backside with a switch she had cut from a tree. "This is for getting making me get all wet!" WHACK! WHACK! WHACK! "This is for the fingernail I broke!" WHACK! WHACK! WHACK! WHACK! Rita glared over at Starbuck who was protesting his lover's mistreatment. "You're next blondie!" Becky, Betty, Jen, and Jade fell onto the ground laughing hysterically.