Date: 1/9/02 Title: Starbuck`s Pussy Author: Betty E-mail: er.br@sympatico.ca Rating: PG, for off stage sex. Pairings: Starbuck/Apollo Archive: Yeah I guess so, if you want it. Category: Humour I think Series: Lords I hope not Disclaimer: This was written for fun and not for profit, even though I could use the money. Notes: This is Jen`s fault, she started the discussion on cats by kicking her`s. Warnings: I don`t think it needs any this time, correct me if I`m wrong though please. Summary: Starbuck finds a lost kitten. Starbuck was not happy as he paced by the shuttle waiting for the Commander and the rest of the council to finish up their business on the old freighter. He always hated having to stand around doing nothing. He had better things to do, like fly a patrol, play cards or, better yet, make love with Apollo. He grumbled to himself as he checked his time piece for the umpteenth time. "Lords how long are they gonna yak away up there, yak yak yak, that`s all them old goats do all day." he said as he kicked at a dirty old black rag that looked like it was ripped off someone`s old fur coat and just thrown on the floor in a heap "they can`t even keep this old rust bucket clean." The old rag let out a feline screech and jumped to it`s feet, glaring at Starbuck. "What was that?" Starbuck said as he kneeled down on the floor. Reaching out to the animal he cooed, "Oh frack your not an old rag, your a little pussy, aww I`m sorry, pussy. Come here." The feline was small and appeared to be only about three sectars old, most likely just weaned from it`s mother. It immediately came to Starbuck and jumped onto his lap. "Aww your a sweet little pussy, yes you are. Where`s your momma, have you lost your momma? Poor little pussy, I`ll take you home with me and take care of you. I know just how you feel losing your momma when your so young." Starbuck continued cooing as he carried the small feline into the shuttle. "Now, where can I hide you so the Commander won`t find you? I know in the storage compartment." Opening the door to the small closet, Starbuck placed a blanket from the first aid supplies on the floor and gently laid the kitten on it. "Now you stay quiet until I get you home." The kitten then turned around twice, scratched at the blanket, and laid down, falling asleep instantly. "Aww that`s a good little pussy." Starbuck cooed again as he shut the door just in time, as the Commander and the council had just arrived and started to board the ship. "All right lieutenant you can take us back to the Glactica now." Adama said as he sat down in the co-pilots seat. The flight home was uneventful, the small kitten hadn`t uttered a sound during the short trip, in fact he was still asleep when Starbuck was finally able to open the closet door to retrieve him, but quickly jumped into Starbuck`s arms when the sound of the door woke him. "What a good pussy you were, yes you were, now I have to find a place to hide you until I can explain you to Apollo." Starbuck soon found an old storage room that looked like it hadn`t been used in yahrens, and placed his new pet there along with the blanket from the shuttle. He then closed the door and left, but returned soon after with enough food and water to last one night. Over the next few sectons Starbuck kept the kitten hidden in the small room, bringing it food and water three times a day and spending centars at time cuddling and petting him. He was spending so much time with the kitten in fact, that Apollo was starting to wonder what his lover was up to, Starbuck still hadn`t found a way to tell him about the small animal, the one time he tried to bring up the subject Apollo had snapped at him. "We already have a droid daggit that I wish I had never had Wilker make and now your asking about a felix? " So he hadn`t tried again. He was starting to think that maybe he should just take his small pet home with him and let the cubits fall where they may. *** Apollo decided he had enough of Starbuck`s sneaking around everyday, going out for centars at a time and not telling where he was going or where he had been. He was starting to think Starbuck had a secret lover stashed away someplace, maybe he was seeing Cassie again.Today he would follow his lover, see where he went, and confront him. Following Starbuck was easier than he thought. He had only hidden in an alcove once, when Starbuck stopped by the ships main kitchen area, where he then saw the head cook give the lieutenant a bag of what looked like table scraps and a bottle of water. "Now what does he want with those things?" Apollo said to himself. He continued to follow Starbuck, his curiosity growing as his lover went down an old, seldom used corridor and entered an unused storage room. Tip toeing up to the slightly opened door his jaw dropped as he heard Starbuck`s cooing. "Pussy, here pussy pussy pussy, where`s my cute wittle pussy, there you are, come to daddy pussy, oh your such a nice pussy, are you purring, does rubbing against daddy make you purr, oh such a nice soft warm pussy...." Apollo couldn`t take it anymore and barged into the room. "*I suppose you thought you could get away with this*" and stopped in his tracks as Starbuck turned around to face him, "a feline? Your holding a felix, a real felix? This is what all the sneaking around has been about, you have been hiding a felix?" "He`s my little pussy." Starbuck whined. Apollo shook and grinned as he said, "Please don`t call him that." "Does that mean I can keep him?" Starbuck smiled brightly. "Yes you can keep him, but you do all the cleaning up after him, and the litter box does *not* go in the bedroom." "Litter box? Damn I knew I forgot something." Starbuck mumbled. *** Later that night Apollo stretched out on top of Starbuck as the two lovers kissed and caressed each other after another long and very satisfying evening of great sex. Suddenly there was a soft thump on the bed and Apollo`s eyes went as he gasped. "Starbuck I don`t think you licked all the whipped cream off my butt." "Hmm, what makes you think that?" "Oh it might have something to do with the fact that felixes *love* cream and yours is now trying to clean up what *you* left behind." Apollo said just before he quickly rolled off Starbuck and yelled "*get out of here you*" and jumped off the bed, running after the felix. "*Don`t you hurt my pussy*!" Starbuck yelled after him.