As soon as I open the door and enter the loft I see my bed. I head straight for it and crawl in fully clothed. I pull the covers up around my shoulders and I feel like I could hide in here forever. I�m tired and although I don�t want to admit it my heart hurts right now. I close my eyes and sleep takes over from there.

I�m at the computer busy finishing up some last minute ideas I got after work for my newest advertising campaign when he comes bopping into the loft. He smiles at me and I can�t help but smile back. He sets his backpack down and is over to me within seconds. He�s on my lap and our lips are drawn together like magnets.

I stand up and pull him with me to the bedroom. He�s grinning and unbuttoning my pants as we make our way up the steps.

�We definitely want to lose these.� He purrs at me dramatically.

I stop and pull his shirt off then he attacks my face again with forceful kisses as he yanks my shirt up.

�Don�t want you getting overheated.� He smiles and sticks the tip of his tongue between his teeth seductively.

I have his pants unfastened in a flash and I push him back onto the bed tearing them the rest of the way off. He grabs my wrist and pulls me down on him. I work my way down his chest licking and nipping at his soft skin as I head for my destination. I haven�t said one word to him yet I feel like I�ve spoken volumes in the last few minutes. Right now words aren�t required for what I�m feeling, he knows it and he always has.

I lick the tip of his hard cock and firmly press my lips around it as I engulf it with my mouth. He moans appreciatively as my tongue is swirling around and around. I take all of him down my throat. His moans get stronger as I quicken my pace of sucking him and laving him with my tongue. I look up into his eyes and he�s watching me and I don�t see anything but lust in those baby blues.

�Fuck me Brian.� He moans and I smile as I keep on sucking his beautiful cock until his breathing tells me that it�s time. He�s covered in goose bumps and then I feel him shoot it all down my throat. I moan as I taste him, my need for him increasing tenfold.

He pulls me up on top of him and we kiss for what seems like hours just grinding on one another. Our hands are roving up and down one another wanting, no needing, to feel each other everywhere. We whisper nonsense to each other just lost in the moment of togetherness. He stops for just a second and I catch the pleading look in his eyes. He wants me right now more than anything else in the world and that look always makes me feel better than I ever have before.

I could lose myself in his eyes as I watch his face while I make sure he�s ready for me. The little moans he�s making as I open him gently with my fingers cause me to lean in and kiss him again hungrily. I swear sometimes I think if I could stay here in this bed with him forever that I�d finally be truly happy and at peace.

He�s slipping a condom in my hand and I can�t help but laugh a little at how impatient he�s being. I slip it on my dick and he�s handing me a tube of lube. I kiss his nose gently and lean in to softly whisper in his ear.

�You got someplace you need to be?�

He looks at me oddly and shakes his head no. I sit back a bit and give him a little smile.

�Then what�s the big rush?�

He groans and rolls over.

�I want you inside of me now Brian.� It�s a command more than anything else with just a hint of desperation behind it. He looks back at me when I take too long, but I can�t help it really, I�m just staring at how stunning he looks lying there waiting.

�God Justin, you are beautiful�� I whisper as I slide inside of him. I press myself against his back and hold him tight against me for a few moments until I hear his breathing settle down some. We start moving together in the familiar motion that we�ve perfected with each other slow strokes at first then faster until we�re both moaning and nearly ready to come.

That�s when I hear someone walking around in the living room. I�m disoriented and suddenly feel all alone in my bed. I look around my vision hazy from sleep.

�Justin?� I realize as soon as I say it that it can�t be him. He�s still in the hospital. My damn dreams take me back to great places sometimes.

�It�s me.� I hear Gus�s voice and I sit up.

�What time is it?� I ask looking around feeling like I�ve only gotten about ten minutes of sleep.

�It�s 9:30.� He�s in the kitchen now and I can hear the microwave humming within minutes.

�So I�ve been asleep about six hours?� I ask running my hand over my face and getting up to go to the bathroom.

�Try thirty hours.�

I finish in the bathroom and come back out.

�Thirty hours?�

He shrugs. �You�ve been asleep since I got here last night about this time.�

�Shit.� I mumble and yawn. �I�m still tired.�

�I figured. That�s why I let you sleep.�

The microwave beeps and he heads over to it and pulls out a huge bowl full of soup.

�Mom thought you might be hungry.�

�I actually am.� I sigh and sit down at the counter watching as he puts some of the soup into a bowl and slides it toward me.

�Aren�t you having any?� I ask as he places a package of crackers down next to the bowl.

�I already ate��

He looks like he wants to say more. When I don�t say anything he continues.

��at the hospital with Justin.�

�How�s he feeling?� I ask, remembering the headache that he�d had when I was there earlier.

�He�s pissed.� Gus states as he begins cleaning up some nonexistent mess on the counter.

�About?�

�His mom is driving him crazy. You disappeared. Take your pick.� He�s watching me now for some kind of reaction, but I�m not going to play into his hands.

�This soup is good. Did your mom make it?�

�Yeah, she did. Why did you leave?�

�Leave?�

�Don�t play stupid with me dad. We both know you�re not. You�ve been there everyday for nearly two months. His mom shows up and you bolt.�

�I didn�t bolt. I came home to get some sleep which I obviously needed if I�ve really been asleep for over a day. Besides, she�s there now. He doesn�t need me to watch out for him anymore, his mommy can do it just fine.�

�Ok maybe you are stupid.�

�Excuse me?�

�You heard me.�

�Gus, drop it. Okay?�

�No. It�s not okay. I�m not going to drop it.�

�Well then keep talking, but don�t expect me to listen.�

�Sit down; SHUT up� and JUST fucking listen for once��

I stare wide eyed at the little shit. I can�t believe he has the balls to talk to me like that. I�m almost proud of him for standing up to me and not taking anymore of my bullshit. I do as I�m told. I sit my ass down on one of the barstools and stare at him crossly waiting for this to be over.

�Now don�t interrupt me and don�t get up and walk away from me either. I mean it.�

�I�m going to tell you a little something about yourself. Okay?�

�I use to have this dad, he was great when I�d come over to visit. He�d laugh and have fun. He was in love.�

I start to say something but he silences me with a look.

�I know you don�t believe in love�. That�s what you say to everyone else, but I know that that�s fucking bullshit. You just told me yourself the other day that you love him.�

�I�m no good for him Gus.� I push the soup away having lost my appetite completely now.

�Shut up.� He glares at me and continues his rant.

�I know how you�ve been since you and Justin split up and I know how you�ve been for the last few weeks. The dad I remember is back. You smile again. You laugh��

He suddenly looks angrier than I�ve ever seen him. He walks away from me but I know he�s not finished. He�s pacing around the living room but he keeps shooting this irritated look at me.

�Why do you want to be miserable? Is that how you feel safe? Trying to feel nothing at all? But ending up feeling miserable?�

�Justin still loves you. I�ve seen you both lately. It�s like someone turned the lights on for both of you. Like you�ve both been stuck in the dark for too long and now that light is back on again.�

�He never stopped loving you and I know you never stopped loving him. This is stupid! All of this wasted time! You�re not getting any younger dad and neither is he. Get your ass up, get in the shower, and go to him. Fucking get your life started again before it�s too late.�

He stops and sinks down onto the sofa. The silence lasts for several minutes before he finally speaks again.

�You know what? I�m done now.�

�Good.� I say as I stand up.

�Do whatever the fuck you want. That�s what you always do.� His voice is low and raspy now.

I look over and realize that Gus is silently crying as he stares out the window. No sound, just tears streaking down his cheeks.

�I need to take a shower.� I simply state as I move toward the bedroom.

He wipes his tears quickly with the back of his hand and stands up.

�I�m going home.�

He grabs his coat and heads for the door.

�You�re not going to go see him are you?�

I don�t answer him, because I don�t know the answer to that yet. Silence fills the air around me, and then it�s broken as I hear the loft door open and shut.

To Be Continued