THOUGH DREAMS can be deceiving
like faces are to hearts
they serve for sweet relieving
when fantasy and reality lie too far apart
- slow like honey, fa |
|
recent
jelly / jelly archives
sunday, january 20
1:27 PM
jude law is one of the most gorgeous men alive. unbelievable. i'm watching i love you, i love you not this morning and all i can focus on is his golden hair and blue eyes and smooth skin and pretty face. god, he is the the perfect specimen. and then i can't decide if i think claire danes is pretty. she is, but then there are times she looks so awkward, and i can't stand it when she cries. she get's all into it and turns into this blubbering mess, with strings of spit stretching between her lips and everything. i guess that's why people cast her, she's real, not always attractive, not always perfect.
so claire loves jude, and walks her dog onto his street. she hides behind a tree. she watches him. then jude finally notices claire cause she writes him a poem for a class. and they fall in love (as much as high schoolers can). they spend days in central park. they kiss. they touch each other's hair. she cheers him on at lacrosse games. he listens to her read. but she's just to intense for him, too romantic, too serious, too poetic. she hates his friends yet he tries to make her feel comfortable. she's his katie and he's her hubbell. his friends don't understand why he 'chose' her. he starts to not understand her. so he leaves her. and then she cries and my heart breaks for her. but then come the strings of spit. so unattractive, claire. really.
the first time that i went there
there was silence all around,
and your street was almost empty,
and the sun beat on the ground.
and since then i keep on going
something pulls me so i go,
though i don't want you to see me,
i don't want you to know.
for i know you'll never love me,
i know you'll never care,
but still i can't help going
for the only place i want to be is there,
yes there... oh there.
thursday, january 17
12:32 AM
today was a very sad day. it already started off kinda sad with a sort of fall out with a friend. then, it seems, within moments, before my tears even dry from my cheek, i get a call that catherine's mother has passed away, in the hospital, with like tubes and ivs and all sorts of medical devices still connected to her. is that any way to die? to be lying in a hospital bed, hooked up to a machine? i guess i tend to romanticize things, even death. but it seems that nothing is romantic these days, not even my fantasies. i pray this passes and passes quickly.
saturday, january 5
10:25 PM
new year's eve was a night to forget. note to self: NEVER take home strange waiters, EVER. however i did kick some ass at taboo... who else do you know can get 9 words in a row in 60 seconds? huh? who?
a friend asked what my resolutions are this year. i don't have any. i never make resolutions. i don't know why. if i did i think one of them might be to spend less time on the computer (when it's not work related). i'm just filling my mind with junk, researching and reading useless article after useless article and useless web site after useless porn site.. um, i mean web site (i'm KIDDING, come on now). it's becoming obscene. i feel myself getting secretary spread and my organs settling into the lower half of my body. i guess it doesn't help that i don't have a job, a car, nor anyone to talk to or play with here at home. i get bored. i get restless. i also don't have any money so i can't work on any craftsy projects or take photos. i end up scavenging the pantry for food items and baking a lot, and eating. good thing i have a high metabolic rate, otherwise my resolution this year would be to lose twenty pounds. i think if i were to make a new year's resolution it would be for every minute spent online i will resolute to spend just as much time reading or doing yoga, or some other sort of exercise, maybe outside... walking or ride my dad's bike or something (once it gets warmer). it IS an addiction i have. i've come to that realization. hi, my name is jennifer... and i'm an internet addict... i guess i need to keep tabs of my minutes online then. is there software that'll do that for you? i know, i bet i can find some online.
more
jelly please
|
|
